The Wild Rose Bush 2g595l

The Wild Rose Bush By Doreen Brust Johnson

The Wild Rose Bush Copyright 2021 Doreen Brust Johnson Rivershore Books All rights reserved

Table of Contents

Dedication To my Readers and Friends Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen My COVID-19 Life Acknowledgements Other Books by Doreen Brust Johnson

Dedication

This story is dedicated to . . .

To my mother, Elsie Frey, I am forever grateful for your hard work and determination you gave in order that Edwin and I could one day have an easier life away from the farm. It was not perfect, but I do appreciate you doing what you felt would be the best for us. Had it not been for you I would not be able to author these four books. It is disappointing that you are no longer with us to enjoy the fruits of your labours. Being an author has given me numerous opportunities to experience the world of writing that I so long dreamed of. Sixty years it took, but like you I persevered even when the road got tough. Thank you. Your determination to also give us a Christian education shall never be forgotten or under-appreciated. Rest in your heavenly home. You shall always be ed with love.

To my father, Rafael Frey, who each day showed me how a father should and could love his children. Each night as I cuddled with you before going to bed you ever so tenderly sang to me. I am thankful to have had you to share my difficulties with each day. You were also adamant that God be kept in our lives. I shall always you with the tender love you so generously gave each and every day. Rest in your heavenly home. I shall always you with love.

To my brother Edwin. I have so many memories of our growing years together. I cannot begin to list a little portion of them. Rest assured I think of you with much love. You were the best brother a little girl could have even when you

whined about doing chores I loved you. My special memory is when we ran all over town visiting the forbidden train tracks. I shall forever you with love. Rest in peace.

To my Readers and Friends

I am forever grateful to each of you for your loyalty and dedication as you follow my journey through the writing process. Your endless and encouragement will never be forgotten. The historical stories of life in the early years mean so much to me as they bring back memories of both good and bad times. I am sure you too have either experienced or heard these stories. Their times were stressful, but yet so simple. These memories leave me in awe of how strong and resilient our forefathers were. Let their experiences and those of our lives make us stronger. It is important that we share this past with the generations to come. I to each of you God’s richest blessings as you and your loved ones continue to walk this path at times of uncertainty.

Best Wishes, Doreen

Prologue

I could hear the wind banging against the door, trying as hard as it could to get in. The cold winter rains had come early. Together they were pounding on the clean clear windows with a determination that was sure to leave them looking as though they had not been washed for many a year. Now that is if they are not broken, lying in shreds on the long, wild, pale green grass, before they decide to move on to another unsuspecting area. In my later years I have been thinking back over my crazy life that I have so carefully hidden in the back of my mind. While I have never wished to think of some of my previous existence, I feel that perhaps now is a good time to face it before it is so late I shall only be left with regrets. None of us can change our former times—some may be good, some sad, some happy, some private, some embarrassing—but regardless it is our history. We cannot have control of where our lives take us while we are young, only when we as adults leave home. My name is Anna. I was born to Dwight and Ruby Barnes on Tuesday, September 27th, 1938 in our slab farm home near Sheffield, United Kingdom. My oldest child Susan and brother Tito shared their single bed with their little sister Lulu. Just like me they were baptized at the farm in the Lutheran faith soon after they were born. My husband is Bud. Stepping back to when my mother Ruby was a young lady; she re wearing a dark blue dress with a low waist emphasized with a matching twoinch-wide imitation belt. The long sleeves nearly covered her hands. She wore her only pair of brown stockings and black flat shoes with a strap. Her shoulderlength hair was brown with a ripple of tight waves. For everyday household work, she wore a dark blue, short-sleeved dress with tiny white flowers. It had seen many a washday but was still holding together. My father Dwight was a handsome gentle man of average height and build. His favourite, and likely only, outfit he had to go to town or visit was a pair of dark dress pants, a plain medium blue shirt with long sleeves, and a tan coloured home-knit button-down sweater with a shawl collar. He liked the pockets and long sleeves. His light brown vintage style hat went everywhere with him except the barn and field. For that he wore an old black one that he inherited from an older brother. Before he washed up at the well, he would remove his hat, giving it a few slaps against his pant leg to shake the dust off.

Some of my fond memories of my parents are when they dressed for church. My father, Dwight, wore a three-button suit with shirt and tie. With a neat short cut hairstyle and a well-trimmed mustache, he did look handsome. His attire was finished with heavy wool socks inside his much-worn ankle high-laced boots that my mother had polished the day before along with hers. As long as I can my mother was a stout lady with dark hair pulled back into a bun. Her good dress was black, long sleeves, and a matching belt around her ample waist. She too wore her ankle black laced boots. Around the farm my father was like other men wearing overalls covering his plaid shirt. My mother, like her mother before, wore a plain style dress of a dark print material as other ladies. Mother enjoyed walking through the fields of vivid wild blue bluebells. My mother Ruby was born on September 30th, 1914, the year that World War I began. It ended on November 11, 1918. Records claim it was directly triggered by the assassination of the Austrian archduke and his wife. It was known to be the first truly global conflict. It was Friday, September 1st, 1939 that Nazi invaded Poland. This was the act that started World War II that ended on September 2, 1945. It was also the day that changed the lives of those around the world forever. World War II involved 61 countries and three quarters of the world’s population. 50 million people lost their lives during this terrible time. Seeing an opportunity, my parent’s thought there would be a better life in America and so along with other relatives they managed to board the boat to America where their family stayed on a farm.

My father, Dwight, soon worked in the field as a farm hand. My mother, Ruby, worked both as a farm hand and a caregiver taking care of the farmer’s sick mother that was living with them. Our home on a farm that we were working on was behind their house. Several young elm trees were growing tall and firm to the side of our place. Our place was actually a slab granary with no windows. The only way we could see the cherry blossom tree they were so proud of was to go outside. It was much too young to have many pretty pink blooms, but I am sure it will grow to be a beauty. The only thing that sticks in my mind is the apple boxes we used for furniture. Every time someone came to our house for any reason the adults all took a walk outside to check on this unusual tree. Mother milked the cows, fed the chickens and pigs as well as helping with laundry all the while taking care of us three and a weakened frail lady that spoke no English. Together they came to care for each other. With smiles and signs they soon were able to communicate gradually bonding into a strange friendship. Mrs. Lopez seldom spoke to anyone, but when no one was around to see or hear she smiled for mother. For some unknown reason she trusted Momma Ruby as she had become known. At the same time Momma Ruby never told anyone of their friendship. Years later she told me that there was something that had happened in that family no one was willing to speak of. It was not Momma Ruby’s way to pry into other people’s lives just as she was not willing to share our business with them. One day as she entered the small barren room where Mrs. Lopez lay, wearing her usual thin green nightgown with tiny yellow flowers; in the corner of the back parlor, she heard a faint sniffling. Who was crying? Creeping over to the side of her bed, she gently laid her hand on Mrs. Lopez’s shoulder who turned her face into her thin pillow that was nothing more than two layers of an old threadbare towel. Momma Ruby felt she was embarrassed to be found crying. Whether it was to be from loneliness or physical pain she was not to ever discover. No one was allowed to enter her room unless it was Momma Ruby taking care of poor Mrs. Lopez. One day she discovered that Charles, my brother, had quietly crept in without startling her. No one would have known except for his humming a tune that was only known to this special shut-away lady. He had been

wandering around the corral as Dad worked, lost in his own world. Suddenly Dad said he realized he should listen to the tune. Being a person with a natural gift for music he later hummed it to Momma Ruby. “Where do you think Charles has heard that?” he asked. Stopping in her tracks with her heart pounding loudly in her chest, she knew. This could mean trouble for our family. To break this rule could mean that we would need to leave with nowhere else to go. With frightened tears streaming down her thin cheeks, she told her husband what she feared. Following a short quiet discussion behind the straw stack where no one would see or hear, they decided Dad would talk to Charles. Being a quiet, gentle man who vowed he would never strike anyone, he first explained how and why we were able to live with the Lopez family and what this meant to our family. They quickly spoke of the rules that Mr. Lopez felt were important to their family, and so we must obey them. Charles agreed. As she tucked him into bed each evening, Momma Ruby would in a couple words tell him how his new friend was doing. This satisfied him, at least for now. Dad was right. They must have frequent short talks with Charles as he was just too intrigued to be trusted. It turned out Mother said Dad had made a good choice. As long as they gave a regular report, Charles was satisfied. One day Mr. Lopez, a gentle but firm, tall, thin man heard Charles singing “You are my Sunshine.” A few minutes later he asked him if he liked to sing for people. “Guess so,” came the solemn reply. “But I have no one to sing to.” “What if I was to tell you that I know someone that would be happy to listen to your singing. Would you still sing then?” “Guess so.” After thinking it over for a minute Charles added, “I am just a boy. No one wants to listen to me. I can play my dad’s mouth organ too. I know I can ’cause my dad showed me how.” “Well, Charles, I know you can. I will speak to your mother, and then we shall

talk again. Alright?” “Yes sir.” And that was how it began. Charles sat on the floor singing and playing while Mrs. Lopez hummed softly in the background never turning her face, but Charles said he just knew she was smiling just for him. Shortly after, Mother thought that Esther too could do something to help Mrs. Lopez feel better. Little by little their trust grew. Each day Esther would quietly tiptoe in to brush her hair that had become very thin just like her frail body. Esther said she would brush and brush until it shone like the stars in the prairie sky on a clear night. My dad could neither read nor write as his father felt there was no need for him to go to school. There was just too much work to do on their meager farm. His music ability that was growing inside him was his comfort. He was happy with his life working with the farm animals and in the fields. With my mother working beside my father, he said there was nothing more a man needed. His dream was for his children to grow old loving the land just as he did. He would one day have his own farm that Charles would be able to take over from him. His daughters that he adored would one day marry a farmer nearby. His life would then be complete. As for me, my job was mostly making meals and baking the bread. Because Daddy would say, “Oh Anna. You can bake bread just as good as your momma. You will one day make someone a wonderful wife.” I did not want to be a wife. I wanted to be a teacher where I could spend my days reading, but I knew not to even think of mentioning it and so I just smiled and went about my chores without a complaint as I dreamed of teaching in the little one room school. Bud’s father and mother were both completely uneducated. His mother was a small timid lady with a weakened body from birthing too many babies. While she loved each baby she was taken during the birth of her tenth child. Mother went on to tell me that her father-in-law was a stern man frequently whipping his children with his belt for making mistakes while doing chores that no child should have been doing. For some reason Momma Ruby told me very little about her parents. They both

ed away in 1935. All she knew was that her father Dwight had the bloated stomach. Her mother Ruby was always a little on the sick and weak side but did birth lots of babies. All were girls, but for three boys.

It was not until I was in my later years that I began to talk of my family and my own life. I had so much to tell. I spent many Sunday afternoons in the living room while visiting with my daughter Luella and her husband Frank Harris with my story telling. She was just too happy to hear it all as she sat with her knitting on her lap. She was always making a new sweater for someone. A lot of it I did myself, and some like me, my mother Ruby still did not find herself willing to speak of it. I have pieced it together in my mind like this. I did not wish to forget our family’s past just as I did not want Luella and Tito to not know it, so I did my best each day to recall my mother’s stories and mine so I could look back on her life that was what made my mother her and now me. After so many years I shared the parts of their sister Susan’s short life with us. Most of it, I found the pain too much to bear. Each day my thoughts began with my memories of her curly brown hair and smiling face. As I drifted off to sleep it was the same. I would not leave her memory behind, and yet I just could not speak of it. There were times that I went to the barn to speak to Bud only to surprise him sharing his thoughts of Dolly to himself. He missed her too. After we cried together in each other’s arms we shared a short prayer that God had taken care of this special little soul. Our angel, whose life was cut much too short. I am afraid the why shall never be answered. During this time there had been a storm looming overhead for several days when finally it broke into a typical Chicago fall storm. The dark blue sky suddenly let streams of large cold raindrops fall fast and hard. The rains were coming faster than the dry earth could begin to soak it up giving way to puddles of water everywhere. The fall days cool down quickly. Being known as the Windy City, it was holding true to this name. While it is usually nice during the day, the cool evenings were coming earlier than usual. Seems like it will not run out of wind for a day or two yet. As I went about my barn chores, doing laundry, cooking meals, and raising our children, I thought how sometimes our life is so similar to that of my mother Ruby’s life. Just like she told me, farm life is pretty much the same year after year regardless of where you are. If you have good quality soil, healthy animals

that can help produce feed and food and you work hard, you can survive. She never mentioned getting rich. No one did.

When we came to America, we all worked hard at settling in. After a time Bud’s two brothers said they both had that feeling that something was not there for them. Their parents and mine had ed away. In time they found it necessary to move to Canada due to work. Each letter was filled with how settled they were. Please come too, was their regular invitation. There is work here for those that seek it. Bud and I both had thought that America would have been our new home, but for some reason it was too different. Work did not seem to be there as we anticipated. The Colorado weather was much too dissimilar to the country we had left. The wind never seemed to stop. It just seemed to change direction. Never did I think that we would be making one more giant move before finding our comfortable home. Plans to move once more were in the back of our minds, but this time with a small amount of hesitancy. Are we being too difficult? While we had worked long and hard it seemed as though there would never be anything more for us. We would always be working for someone else in turn getting us no further ahead. It was not long before we agreed that if we had stayed in Colorado I would forever be doing housework for someone else and Bud would be cleaning stalls at the Livery Stable. These were great starter jobs in a new country but not ones that we hoped to be doing forever. With some help and much urging from Bud’s siblings we decided we too would make the move before we would be finding ourselves paying adult fare for Tito and Luella. Tito said he was happy to move. He did not fit in with the others at his school. They liked to tease him about his accent. We were not aware of this, but thought at his next school I would be paying more attention to how my children adjusted to one more new home. All we had to take with us were our personal clothes. With two old suitcases packed we boarded the train once more. The only people we had to say goodbye to were the landlord and the two people that had hired us. When we were on the train, Bud said what a cold and lonely city Colorado was for his family. We both knew that in some way it was partly our fault. Perhaps we just didn’t fit in. Canada can only be warmer.

In the early morning hours as daylight began to come, we arrived at the New Westminster station to the happy smile of his oldest brother. As Gus drove along showing us some of the sights that he thought might catch our interest, he suddenly braked, causing the children to lose their balance as they stood craning their necks to see everything at once. “Did you see that sign?” Gus asked anxiously waiting for our response. It took both of us a minute to see the sign posted beside the road that read “Help Wanted.” “For where?” I asked. “Let me see. The printing is so small I can hardly read it. I will take a closer look.” With that Gus was out to return in a quick minute. “I know that man. He works at the Grain Elevator. I do not need to tell you what that is, do I?” “No,” said Bud. “That sounds too good to be true, but let us go there and see. We must tell him that I cannot read very well. My numbers I know. For some reason letters just would not stick with me so I concentrated on numbers. I knew I could be good at something,” he laughed. “Not that good,” said Gus. “I have five young ones and you have two or have you not noticed?” Sending my face into a bright red Gus began to really enjoy his moment to shine. Being a private man Bud did not know just what to say either. “That is alright brother,” Gus laughed. “I know you can do it. However, you have not told me how you got so good with numbers and not with letters,” he stated with a mischievous look on his round face. Then came the shouts from the back. “I can see the elevators, Daddy!” Bud was saved from any more embarrassment. Well for now. The grounds around the elevators were neatly trimmed. Around the back were several rich green shrubs shaded by a couple taller trees. I decided the neatly mowed grass was just right for the three of us to stretch our legs. This looked like a nice place for them to run around a little to wear off some of their energy as well as our waiting time. In a short while the men came back waving us over to them. They were both smiling so I had a good feeling that all went well.

Before Bud had to answer that previous question, Lulu interrupted with one of her questions. I could see relief cross over his face. “Did you get work, Daddy, did you?” “Yes, Lulu, I did.” followed by shouts of joy from all of us. “Do you go to work tomorrow, Daddy?” “Yes, Lulu. I do. Tomorrow Mommy will take you and Tito to see your new school while I go to work. I am just as excited as you are.”

Chapter One

Our first Canadian summer came to a close with a note of excitement. For the most part we enjoyed a hot dry season. Just about the time we felt we could not take another day of the heat, we were blessed with some rain. Super tiny raindrops hung onto the branches like little sparkling crystals as the sun began to shine. The air smelled fresh and clean. At times it lasted for a partial day, and other times for two days, falling heavier during the night hours. Never more. No one was complaining. It seemed to be enough rain to feed the vegetation. That was all we wanted and needed. For our family it felt perfect. It was Canada. At last we were home once more, feeling as though this was where we were meant to be. This is the time to stay. We worked hard to get our Canadian Citizenship papers for this grand country we were enjoying so much. We soon were able to locate a Marks & Spencer store near where we were living. A little touch of home. Most of all I was able to locate the chocolate covered biscuits we all loved, especially me. A great surprise to be able to purchase a few of our favourite British treats. Each time Bud would put his arm across my shoulder giving me a little squeeze. As I looked up at his smiling face I would say, every time, “Home is not so far away after all.” What a great welcome to Canada we have been receiving. We are both aware that neither of us will be able to earn a higher wage until we become a Citizen of this new country, but we need to start somewhere. I hope to be able to get some work doing housework to start with. “So Anna,” asked Gus. “What do think of your new country so far?” “When I was walking around I felt as though we were home at last. The air smelled like home. It was full of fresh grass and trees. I am sure this will be home for us. It feels just right.” “That is just what my Hannah kept saying. The Canadian air is like the air when we were young. Clean and fresh with both a cold nip to it during the winter months that turn into hot and dry air during the summer. We get a little of everything throughout the year. Just like we should,” she would say emphatically. “Never would I contradict her especially when she is right.” So good to see that Gus still adores his wife like the day they married.

In the next few days I prepared Tito and Luella for their first days at another new school. Hannah was a great help to me explaining just what all is required to them in school. They would be attending the school within walking distance from the suite they had rented for us. Again it was small but certainly adequate. We had so little to add to the simple basic furniture that was already in it. After supper on our first night there, Gus had asked Tito if he knew what his name meant. Of course he did not. I had forgotten to explain it to him. “So who is going to tell me? The kids in Colorado told me I had a strange name. Is it?” he asked. “Not if you were your grandfather. He had a friend that he was very close to with the same name. He wanted all his grandsons to be called Tito after this great man that was Spanish. In Spanish it means uncle. Luckily you are the only boy or there would be cousins running around all called Tito.” “So what does my name mean?” asked Luella. “I have no idea dear,” I replied as gently as I could. “There was a lady in our church when I was a young girl that was very pretty. Her name was Luella and so was her daughter. I just thinking that if one day I had a baby girl I would call her Luella because I knew she would be just as pretty.” “Oh Momma! You just made that up did you not?” said Luella. Before I could answer Bud reassured her that was a true story. It was his favorite name for a little girl, he explained as he looked at her with that adoring smile that he seemed to have just for her.

The next year flew by so fast I could hardly take it all in. Both Tito and Luella settled into their new school quickly making friends with kids that lived in our neighbourhood. They were always happy and included in the outdoor games. Tito played ball in the street with the other boys. Luella skipped with the girls. She soon learned how to play jacks and hopscotch. They were happy to go to school to see those friends they only saw while there. One day she came in asking for a Hula Hoop. Now what is that? Her friend came along just for or to help convince me. Either way when I looked at hers I thought that would be a good toy for Luella. To me it just looked like a large plastic circular tube that they rotated around their body, limbs, or neck as they tried to keep it spinning longer than their friends before it fell to the ground. Such great physical exercise I thought so I said yes, sending them both into gales of delight. Luella came to be known as the girl with the hair ribbon. Another dream of mine was to put hair ribbons in my little girl’s hair. I know one day she will put a halt to this but in the meantime I will buy hair ribbons as much as I can. Hair ribbons and a handkerchief were two things my mother said all little girls should have. I never go out without a clean well-pressed handkerchief in my purse. I may not have money, but my purse goes with me as though I do. Shortly after settling into our little Canadian home, the land lady Mrs. Hill said I could borrow her sewing machine as it just sat idly in her closet. It came with a warning though. It is on its last legs and will not be worth fixing if it decides it has had enough. I quickly came to love this very much-used Singer sewing machine. It was a table top that I turned the wheel with my right hand as I fed the material in with my left. I saved all the thread I could from old garments. Sometimes my sisters would include a partial spool of thread in their care parcels. Each time I used it I said a silent prayer that it would not be the last but alas it eventually gave up. Bud did his best to try to get it to work some more but that was just not going to happen. When he saw the disappointed look on my face he said, “Cheer up my dearest. There is a man at the mill that fixed his wife’s sewing machine recently. I will ask him tomorrow if he has any ideas. Try not to worry. If I can get it to work for you, you know I will.”

The next evening as soon as he hung his coat up, removed his shoes, and washed up he gave me a hug, holding me extra long. I knew then his answer was no, it could not be done. I wanted to cry, but I was not going to act like a spoilt child. If it was worn out then so be it. One day . . . “Old George said that when the innards are worn out there is nothing we can do. He suggested we could place it somewhere just to look at.” “We sure do not have any extra room for that. Perhaps if it had been my mother’s it would have had some sentimental attraction. Any good ideas we can do with it now?” I asked trying to stop my voice from trembling. “There is a fellow that has a brother living in Hope that speaks of a store in their town. The owner takes them and displays them in his store for people to ire. He just might be interested.” “Gee Bud. That gives me an idea. How about if I ask Mr. Moore the next time I walk by his department store if perhaps he would like it in remembrance of his long-time customer Mrs. Hill. I know she shopped in his sewing department for many years. All he can say is no.” “That is a great idea. Somehow I think you will just happen to go by tomorrow. Hmm? Am I correct dearest?” “You are!” I said laughing. “You know me too well. But you know I like to stop in there fairly frequently in hopes that one day I just might land a job there.” The next evening I was so eager for Bud to return from his work. I just had to tell him the story of my sewing machine. I can hardly believe it myself. When we finished our supper and Luella and I had cleaned up the kitchen he said to me with his mischievous smile that give him away every time, “So what did Mr. Moore have to say?” It is the same smile Tito has. Neither of them can keep a secret from me especially when they are up to something good. “Oh that! The sewing machine you mean. With that his story began. He would love to have it, he said. That sewing machine had sat here in my store for a couple years when one day I looked out the window to see a young man with his head bent low as he walked into the wind with the cold snow blowing into his face. Why would anyone be out in this blizzard Mr. Moore asked himself. I can not understand it. Is he lost?

“Turns out it was a young Mr. Hill looking for something for his Mrs. She had come down with something, I can’t just what it was but she would be tied to the house for some weeks. He said he thought this would cheer her up. I am sure it did, as she frequently over the years has been in here to purchase material for a project or other. That was many years ago. Over the years when there is a bad snowstorm I can count on him in the wind and snow to stop in just to shoot the breeze. “We became friends. How can you not like a man that will weather a storm for his Mrs.? She was a nice lady too. I was sure sad to hear of her sudden ing and then Mr. Hill having to move away to be closer to family. I will find a way to move things around to show it off. Thank you so much for thinking of me. Drop it off anytime you can get some help bringing it over.” Whenever I had a flour sack or a sugar sack I would wash and rewash it scrubbing the printing with my lye soap to remove the red advertising just like my mother had taught me. This was a project I saved for the winter months. Laying them outside on the clear white snow with the hot sun shining down the colour eventually drained itself leaving the sacks a clean milky white. Sometimes this took as many as seven times washing each with a hard scrubbing on the scrub board that left my knuckles red and bruised, but I needed every piece of material I could get my hands on. Hopefully another sewing machine opportunity shall come along. During the day was the best time for light at the kitchen table as it shone through the window. This was also the time I was away working at the bakery. It was a juggling match, but I usually managed to get the mending that required a sewing machine for better results done during the day on my days off. I was accustomed to hand sewing in the evening by a dim light. Now I shall be doing all my sewing and mending by hand. It works too but takes so much longer. Even with my thimble my mother had given me when I left home some of the heavy material left my fingers bleeding from the needle holes poked into them. I was so fortunate to get a job in the bakery that was close enough for me to walk. It saved on both time and bus fare. I began at six in the morning helping the baker mix the dough for the buns and cinnamon rolls and cookies. Yesterday I was asked to decorate some cakes as the cake decorator was too sick to come to work. I instantly loved my newly found job. Both excitement and nervousness overcame me. No matter what I would try my best. How hard can this be?

After a few short words as to what the manager thought our steady cake decorator did, I was left by myself. Suddenly I could feel the water building in my hazel eyes. There were tips and tubes that I had never before seen. However was I to make a cake look beautiful? I did not know how to make roses, or any flower for that matter. I wanted to run out the door and hide in some far-away dark corner where no one would ever find me. After a moment of hesitation that seemed to last for hours I felt my mother beside me. Chin up my dear. The Barnes family never backs away from a challenge. Use your imagination for something besides telling yourself stories. Mother was right. I could and I would do it. If Bud can meet his challenges so can I. We will succeed, slowly but surely for a better future. We will do it together. We will do it for our children and their education. By the end of the day there was icing from one end of the counter to the other, and some on the floor which I pretended to not notice. Three cakes were decorated waiting to be picked up for their evening birthday parties. I must say they did not look too bad considering I had to be creative. I think I invented some new flowers that God had not thought of just yet. Mother would say there is a silver lining in everything. For me today it was that I would be outside in the fresh air walking home deep in thought when our customers collected their cakes for their someone special. In the morning I shall know if I still have a job or would I be the one cleaning the floors after hours. At four in the morning Big Ben began to rattle and shake. Oh no. It can not be that time already. Bud was dressed. “Do not worry my dearest all shall be well. I have a secret to share with you. As we were leaving the mill yesterday the foreman mentioned how he was looking forward to dinner. It was his birthday and his wife was going to surprise him with a beautiful cake from the bakery. Not just any bakery, the one you work at,” he said as he kissed my forehead. “Now my dearest, we both shall get ready for our day. You will be just fine. Perhaps tomorrow night I will share with you a little of my first couple days. It will make you feel instantly better, I promise.” A year has gone by and I am still decorating cakes. The flowers would even be recognizable by God. A few weeks after what I felt was a disaster Baker John shared his secret with me. One customer asked him where I came up with

flowers that looked like that. With that twinkle in his eye he said why in Britain, I told them. I saw lots of them growing wild in the hills when I visited my sister. Your cakes are lovely, Anna! Stop worrying. Months had flown by like they all seem to. It was my day off. I was feeling a little down from too much work. I decided that no matter what when today came I was walking to Hibbard’s Dept. Store if for nothing else but to browse to lift my spirits. When I woke to a howling wind I thought it was the end of my plans. Guess that is not going to happen once again. About mid-morning I thought, no nothing is going to deter me. I need this day off. I could tell the rains were not that far off in the dark blue sky. Surely they shall hold all their moisture for a few hours until I return. As I wandered around the store spending more of my time in the fabric department my spirits began to lift. I was feeling like I was on the moon going for a ride to places unknown. One moment I felt like a child in a candy store, and the next a man in a hardware store, a schoolteacher in a Book Store. I could not stop smiling. My next stop was in the china department not that I was in need of more dishes. We had all we needed. “Anna. Anna!” came a familiar sounding voice. I could not put my finger on just where I had heard it before when before me stood a tall gentleman with dark brown hair and a smile as big as a dinner plate. “Mr. Moore. I apologize for being in my own world dreaming of all the pretty things you have in your store.” “That is good. It is so good to see you happy in my store. I tried to reach you. I would like you to work for me. It is the fabric department that desperately needs some care and organization. Would you be interested enough to stop decorating those beautiful cakes and look at fabric and ribbons all day? Your pay will be more than you are making now. Also you will have sick time. Holiday pay will be held for you. We have a lunchroom where you will meet other staff from other departments. What else do you wish to hear to convince you?” he said with a laugh.

I stood as though I was glued to the floor. Much as I tried I could not answer. My tongue was stuck in my mouth that seemed to be filled with feathers. For all I was worth I knew that I must answer. This kind man did offer me a job, did he not? “Anna. Are you alright?” Mr. Moore was asking me with a definite chuckle in his soft voice. “Mr. Moore. I apologize for my inability to be able to speak. Imagine that, me not being able to speak. Your offer sounds so very good, but I would need to give my fair notice at the bakery.” “Then it is settled. Let me know when you can start. I am looking forward to having you added as a member of our team. My customers will love to have you here to assist them with their needs.” With that he turned and walked away. As I remained frozen in my shoes I was certain I noticed him take a quick peek over his shoulder. Mr. Moore was still smiling and so was I. That night Bud and I celebrated my new job by splurging with two cups of coffee after supper. There were no special sweets to go with it, but my excitement made up for it. Luella was excited too but Tito couldn’t understand what was so special about working in Hibbard’s. Bud just kept smiling. He was very proud of me he continuously repeated.

I find myself thinking back to how the strange sound of the wolves howling would frighten us children when we were young. They would tell us how they were just talking to each other but because the night was still it carried their voices from afar. When they asked about the big shining eyes they could see in the dark, Charles would say they are the reflections from the man in the moon. And so I believed him. My mother had told us the man in the moon was a friend to all as he helped to show the way to those that were out and about in the night, and so I too tell this to my children. Sunday was over and that meant the workweek was here. No more time off. When I think of the feel of the cool fresh fall air I am reminded of the longer days of working in the fields before the winter snow would arrive. We all worked hard to help bring in the garden vegetables for canning for our winter’s use. Whenever necessary farm children would have to go to the field to help their dad even if it was just in a small way. Their dad would tell them this was how they learned as well as sharing the workload on the family farm as this is what a family does. These are memories they shall savour forever as they them on to their children. When my children were young I would point out different types of wild grasses that grew along the roadside. The green grass was tall waiting for the grazers, animals like the horse or a cow on the loose, to forage. The odd lonely White Wild Indigo stood tall loaded with white blooms so heavy it could barely stand. My favourite was always the low soft coloured fox tail waving its fluffy plumes in the breeze. We would look far up into the blue sky at the fluffy white clouds floating along. I told them stories of how when Uncles Charles and I were young we ran out to our forest looking for anything that moved especially a bush rabbit. We loved the way they hopped. How Uncle Charles would climb up the tree to peer into the nests that a mother bird had left while searching for food for her babies. How we knew that we must never try to touch the nest for fear the mother would not return to her babies. For some reason he was more fascinated with the eggs in a teal speckled shiny colour than seeing a baby bird. Perhaps because they were so small and delicate looking.

They asked to hear more stories of when we were young as though that was something unheard of. One day they will be sharing similar stories with their children. I would tell them how the road leading to our farm was bumpy from the ruts that had formed after a hard rainfall and now had dried with the wheels from ing wagons having left their grooves cutting deep into the road. These ruts often prevented rainwater from flowing to the side of the road into the dirty ditches. Rough roads make it difficult for the horses to walk as they pulled the family wagon along hoping to stay on the roadway and not find it pulling them into the ditch. When at last the team was guided off this main rutty road onto a less traveled roadway that was more of a trail of trampled wild grass with two narrow ribbons of dirt peeking out leading us into the bush. We were now homesteaders on a farm approximately thirteen km north of a village with no power, electricity, or a well pump. We pulled the water up by hand with a pail tied to the end of a thin worn rope. The seasons changed at their own whim. At times we were looking forward to the next season, but other times not. It came regardless. We could be enjoying the beautiful warm fall days in summer clothes to wake up to see the outdoors swathed in a thick fluffy overlay of pure white sparkling snow. The first snowfall was the most pristine as there had not as yet been anything to leave the slightest dingy spot to mark its visit. Our winters arrived anywhere between the first of October and the 30th. Spring runoff would be like a thief in the night turning our white snow into ice-cold water to rush along the ditches until they were filled to the top normally around the beginning of April with the temperatures gradually getting warmer. When the weather had sudden spurts of warmer than normal temperatures creating a sudden runoff we could experience flooding. Not only would the ditches be filled to the brim with cold running water, the fields would be left too wet for the planting season to begin delaying the fall harvest. Then there was the concern of getting the crops removed before the first snowfall. Then along came spring with the hungry mosquitoes. They feed on warmblooded people and cattle. Mosquitoes breed during the warmer months

with the females depositing their eggs on the surface of water in groups of 50 to 200. All 200 must be here seeking their next meal. Summer was hot and dry. The breezes were warm as the hot sun beat its way down upon us. Each time we went somewhere it was either stifling hot or the wind was busy blowing the dust from one area to the other leaving a fair share either in our hair or on our faces. We would wake to the friendly chirp of the birds that returned to visit for another summer. The animals were roaming the farm from morning until bedtime. They seemed to know where the best rich green grass was. The water trough was in the coral filled with fresh water each day ready for them to have a drink. Salt licks lay among the trees for them. Before we knew it the winter snow stole its way into our lives again, it came and came as though it had no idea just when to quit. It would be so deep you could not see where the side of the road was. The swirling snow that softly landed on the sparkling white snowdrifts was so pretty to look at. Once again the deep ditches would be filled to overflowing with the cold crispy white flakes as it drifted in. Fence posts would disappear under the deep snowfield. Icicles hung from the rooftops waiting for us to break them off to lick their frozen water. The weather circle had begun once again.

Try as I might my thoughts keep turning to times of yesteryear as I walked back and forth from my job. Like when the summers were hot and dry with dusty roads. The men and boys wore hats to help keep their hair dust free while ladies and girls wore kerchiefs over their hair. Life here was not at all like life in Colorado. It seemed as if we had stepped back in time just a little. The people were friendlier. It was more peaceful. The pace was slower. In town everyone took time to say hello and have a little chat. If they had not met you they introduced themselves. It was as though they had always known us. Tito quickly picked up on saying eh making us laugh. Both him and Luella were losing their English accent. They loved to tell us how they fit in with the others.

There are still times when I think back to when I was a young girl of the coyotes and wolves. We would stand to peek out the window into the dark just to check if there were glowing eyes peering at our house from the pack of coyotes that liked to keep watch with their bright shining eyes and eerie mournful howls. In the background we could hear the howl of the wolves as they called to each other telling them where they were. Their howl could be heard for six miles. Wolves are not known to attack humans even as we felt the chill run through our bodies just from the thought that there were so many out there near our house. The coyotes were a little different. While they too traveled in packs they would attack if threatened or in desperate need of a meal. As long as they couldn’t see us or smell food we felt safe inside. I do still feel the quivers when I think of the times Dad would prop the door shut so it would be more difficult for them to get inside our home. Then he would move his chair to the front of the door so we children would feel that he would be able to fight them off should they try to push our door in. Even though we knew he kept his gun in the barn we were able to go to sleep knowing we were looked after. Now our children will occasionally nights where the only sounds to be heard are the cars and perhaps a siren as someone is in need of help. Now they each can earn a little spending money on their own. Tito delivers newspapers while Lulu babysat for the neighbours. She even does some housework for another neighbour. Today whenever I know company is coming I am sure to have something baked to serve. I try my best to keep some cookies ready for a daily treat. We are all enjoying this life more and more each day. This year as soon as the ground warmed I planted some marigolds and asters. The water from the melted snow had been guzzled up by the black soil as it waited upon the warm spring air. As I stand there with the hose giving them their drink of cold water I get reminded of the wild flowers that grew for us each year as I would hope they would receive some water from the rains, but not so much they would drown. Each spring I looked forward to the wild flowers blooming among the fresh green grass throughout our farm. Somehow I still fondly them. There were vivid orange tiger lilies, creamy yellow buttercups, blue bells, and bright yellow lady slippers. Dandelions also grew there spreading their seed in the fall

winds. Bull rushes grew in the ditches waving their brown fuzzy heads in the breeze. We called them cattails. Here and there we could find a few pussy willow bushes growing wild. That was some of the beauty of country living. They thrived on the hot summer sun with the bees buzzing as they visited one flower after the other in the quiet hot summer sun. Working in the garden was a time to enjoy the quiet calm of the breeze moving the leaves on the spindly plants back and forth.

Chapter Two

Living here in the city there are times when I miss the quiet peaceful life. Most of all, I miss not being able to see the wild bushes and flowers. We do hear the crows cawing to each other. There never seems to be a minute of stillness. The traffic seems to whiz by as though there is not a second to spare. Emergency vehicles flew up and down the roads as they hurried to save someone’s life. The lights on their vehicles flashed on and off in a bright red that told us to get out of their way. As a young girl Luella loved to sit in the hot summer sun just to watch the butterflies fluttering about with their delicate yellow wings. She too enjoyed her quiet time, but has quickly come to like the city life better. She likes the bustle of people moving around. Her discovery of the neighbourhood library gives her so much joy. The excitement steams from her whenever she prepares to return books and then search for others new to her. Not for a minute would I wish to change my city life for that of the far away part of our country where you are all alone with the wild animals and birds. Your family was your only company most every day throughout the year and yet many times I would like to have a little of that quiet still time to mellow out but not for long. Just a day or two to unwind from this hectic pace that is called city life that I sought so hard to get would be nice. School hours on the farm were filled with arithmetic, language, spelling and reading. These were the only subjects offered. I wanted more for my children. I wanted them to have easier jobs. Jobs that they have been dreaming of. Be it a doctor, a nurse, a teacher, or a clerk in a store. Those were choices that were not available on the farm. Now I can see it being within arms’ reach. Unless I get too wrapped in my city life to stop and these times I do not realize just how good my new life is. Here I can and do leave my door and window open to let in the fresh air anytime without a moments’ hesitation. We do not even have a key for the door into our home. I do close it when it is time to retire for the night more so that a stray cat could not wander inside than an inquisitive person. To these hard times is to keep us grateful for all that has been given to us in this new life. Showing her biggest smile Lulu says that she has to wear dresses every day to school! No more hand-me-down overalls for that girl. She

also wished to be called Luella from now on. For Tito she is still Lu. Luella now has a bread machine. Never did I dream of such a thing. Before she leaves for work she places the ingredients in the machine and then sets the timer. When she returns all she needs to do is remove the loaf of fresh baked bread to supplement their supper. The house also has that delicious aroma. She says that is her style of baking bread. If it works for her I shall not complain or criticize. I did wish for her life to be easier than mine.

Auntie Hannie is now frail living in a home that can provide her with the necessary help she requires. Occasionally a lady from the church that she had attended will stop in for a visit. While there she would assist Auntie, as they all call her, with dropping me a few lines to say how she is, and what is happening with her health wise. It ends with the reassurance that she is in need of nothing just my treasured letters that someone will read to her. Ever since she had the bad experience of a stranger entering her room while she was having her lunch in the dining hall with her friends she felt uncomfortable being outside her private room. Slowly she is gaining a little more trust each day. Upon her return she found her things were strewn around the room. As though this was not upsetting enough it was made so much worse with the discovery of her missing purse. She never kept much money in it, but the little she did have was for when someone went to a big store she could ask the staff member to pick up something for her. It was usually a personal item. It was little comfort to know that there were two more rooms ransacked at the same time. This now began the days of locking the entrance door. We are able to leave our homes unlocked while away for the day, but the vulnerable are not safe.

Seems as though I still spend a lot of time thinking back on our life we left behind. Bud had been working at the Livery Stable in town ever since we arrived in Colorado. He was fortunate that he walked in on the day they needed to hire a hired hand. Before his duties were given to him Bud said he would take the job. Roger Manse was a large muscular man with the appearance of someone who spends each and every day outside regardless of the weather. His skin was darkened from the sharp wind and hot sun. His steely eyes probe into your thoughts as he looks for honesty. “Well now,” said the smiling Roger, “I like a man that is eager to work. Let us give it a try. See you here at seven sharp.” Bud said to me that all he could do was stare at his back as he walked away. So the next morning he began his first job away from the farm. At the end of each day he returned home tired and hungry but happy. Much to my relief he loved this job. As we all sat together at the evening table we each shared something of our day that we enjoyed. Bud’s days were long but that was what he was accustomed to, and as he said what would he ever do in the city without his horses to care for. The little suite that we rented from an elderly couple was warm and bright with little furniture. We had our beds to lie on for a good night’s rest, a table with chairs to sit on as well as a older worn sofa to relax on before going to bed. Our ice box sat on the back porch. Both Bud and I would look at the sofa and chuckle. It was so bright. The buttercup yellow flowers, grass green leaves, and tiger lily orange flowers gave it the appearance of being so alive it could walk away at anytime by itself. Many evenings he would say to me, “I wonder what Kirk and Ava are doing. Let us hope that they too have found a new easier and more reliable life somewhere else. I do miss the sound of his heavy horses as they came trotting into our yard with their harnesses shaking.” “I do too. Ava was such a good-hearted friend. I also think very fondly of Mr. and Mrs. Watson. Each time I am in a grocery store purchasing honey I think about Mr. Parsons and how hard he worked looking after his bee colony. To me it seemed like a lot of work for little return.

One day as I was shopping in the local grocery store I stopped, like always to gaze at the numerous containers of honey on the shelf when a lady appeared beside me. Not saying anything she just stood there taking in all there was to choose from. For some reason I felt that I should strike up a conversation with her. Of course honey was my subject. While she did not speak I had the feeling she was enjoying being included in a conversation. I told her about the bees on our farm, which quickly perked her interest. Not offering anything I then asked her if she had lived on a farm. In a very soft voice she said her parents were farmers many years ago moving into town when she was two years old and so has no real memories of farm life only what she has heard them speak of. After a short time of more idle conversation we parted ways as we both continued to do our shopping. It was a couple weeks later in the cereal aisle that she walked over to me. With the faintest smile she said, “So here we are again. This time it is breakfast food.” Now I noticed her words were carefully spoken as though she had trouble getting them formed and then verbalized. I needed to take the same amount of care to understand, but in a moment we were able to carry on a conversation that mostly consisted of the price of groceries. After going our separate ways as we concentrated on our individual lists, we found ourselves completing our grocery expedition at the same time. Thanking the cashier and gathering my several bags I meandered outside to my car. As chance would have it we were parked close to each other so we once again struck up a conversation. This time I saw a smile cross her face that seemed to have her relax a little. It was as if a hundred pounds was off her shoulders at last. I thought of inviting her to my place sometime for coffee, but there was a hesitancy that I could not explain. Inside me was a feeling that there could be something lurking that I may not wish to be involved in. Yes, I need to get to know a little more about her. Well, anything will be more than I know now. Is she hiding something or just shy? Today she told me her name was Wanda Allen. She was a waitress working the

afternoon shift. She was medium height, slightly on the stout side with a bright red fluffy hairstyle that looked stunning on her. The loose curl gave her a look of interest. That person that you just want to get to know because you can feel she would have an interesting story to tell. Hmm, but how do I go about it? For sure she will ask me about my story. Am I ready to share with just anyone? As though reading my mind she asked me if I knew where the Rascal Rally Diner is because that is where she works. She starts at two in the afternoon. So would I be able to meet her there say at one o’clock this coming Friday for a cup of coffee and a chat? I carefully explained that I work in Hibbard’s Department Store. My days off are Sunday and Wednesday. My Sundays are filled with church in the morning, then relaxing as I catch up on home chores. Then dinnertime is family time. “Would a Wednesday possibly work for you?” I asked. “I really would enjoy spending a little time just chatting. By the way I am Anna Miller. I can not your name and I know you just told me.” “That is all right because I am not sure I even told you. Wanda Allen. And yes, that will be fine. My life is not exactly overflowing on the social calendar,” she said with a forced laugh. “Me neither,” I said trying to not sound like I had a bunch of friends which I really did not. I was friendly with two ladies that I worked with and one from church. Then there is the neighbour family that is so kind to us. That pretty much does it, I thought. Before I knew it Wednesday had arrived. In these past few days I never once thought of my previous life and just what I was willing to share. I was too excited about making a friend, a friendship that I hoped would lead us to a comfortable place in our lives. I dressed in a blue dress that I wore to work. Took a little extra time to fix my hair. In the end it still looked frizzy and curly to me, but what could I do. It was what I had been blessed with. Plain brown was just nothing special not like Luella’s jet black curly hair. Now Anna, do not be vain, I chastised myself. You are not about looking pretty, Daddy saying it is what is inside your heart that people will see. Let it shine! It was when I moseyed inside through the cheery yellow door leaving the cool breeze outside that I suddenly felt nervous.

Was this a mistake? Just then I heard “Hello Anna,” coming over my left shoulder. Too late now to leave so I may as well take a deep breath and give it my all. I can do it, I am sure I can. Just like I had promised myself when Bud was taken from me. It is a part of looking after myself. Making myself a life in this busy world. Wanda showed me to a table near the back corner of their dining area with the confidence I would never have guessed she possessed. For a few moments she was all waitress. The tables were sparkling clean. Each table was covered in the popular red and white checked oilcloth. Chrome chairs with a black cushion on the seat were clean and neatly placed at each setting. Flatware too was clean and shiny as it rested on individual white paper napkins. The centerpiece was a cluster of salt, pepper, ketchup, mustard, and sugar supplies. The ashtray had been washed clean from the previous patrons. While I seated myself choosing a chair that would keep my back to other patrons, Wanda filled two cups with steaming hot coffee accompanied by a fresh baked cinnamon bun for each. The yummiest one I have had since I left the bakery. Suddenly our visit became a feeling of awkwardness. We had finished the subject of coffee and buns. I could tell we both felt we must now bring out a little of our personal lives. I knew we must be honest with each other if we wished for a true friendship to arise just like fresh baked yeast dough. “So tell me Anna, where was your farm and why are you not still there?” Taking a deep breath I hesitated for a moment looking into her eyes. Would I see understanding in the deep brown eyes that did not go with the red hair, but they seemed to be what she had. “Oh Anna. Do not fret. I will never ever tell anything to anyone else. My story is not pretty but it is what I have. I have decided I really need to share it with someone. You.” “You are right Wanda. I have spent so many years trying to go through life as though I have no story. One of these days it is just going to pop out of me when I

least expect it so I think I would rather share it with you. We will need to meet many times to begin to cover it all. So for today how would it be we just open the door a little? What do you think?” “That sounds good to me,” said Wanda. “For starters my husband is in jail and has been for a couple years now. I have two sons that are working in Chilliwack. The distance of 60 miles makes it plausible to have them home for one visit a year. More would be better but they must work. “John my oldest is planning to marry a petite little dark haired lass Helen. Just when this wedding will be I don’t know. Charles, he is three years younger, is now seeing a blonde girl by the name of Julia. I just hope they both settle down with a nice wife and then give me some grand babies to cuddle. Every time I see them together I find myself just looking at the girls until I hear MOM! They read too much into me,” she said with a little laugh. “I know what you mean. My husband Bud fell victim to a tragic accident three years ago while I was away visiting in the heart of the city for a day. It was a day that my children and I shall never forget. I have a son Tito and a daughter Luella. Her daddy called her Lulu when she was little so then she was Lulu until we moved to the city. She chooses to be called Luella. Tito seems to call her Lu more than anything else. As long as the others do not she is fine with it. “While we lived on the farm I knew how to keep every corner of it running, but city life had brought some new things to learn for both of us. I do love it and certainly this life is much better than the farm life. To that I shall never return. “At first I was so afraid that I could never make a go of it on my own, but now I seem to be managing quite well. I was so fortunate to land a job in the department store as it is so much easier with better working hours than the bakery.” “I understand what you mean. When Curtis was sentenced to his jail time I was so mixed. With one hand I felt I no longer had to worry about his gambling habit, but with the other I wondered how our lives would be in this new way. I don’t wish for my sons to follow in their father’s footsteps. For a while I was afraid Charles would choose the same path. For some reason as much as I talked to him about it he seemed to find it exciting. He clearly thought I worried too much over nothing.

“The day the officers came to arrest Curtis, Charles answered the door. I think that was the moment that it became real for Charles. This was no longer a game. That night he cried himself to sleep. There didn’t seem to be anything I could do or say to stop his heart from breaking. Over and over he would say, ‘How could Dad do this to us?’ ” When I heard JAIL I could have sworn that she yelled it. My heart took a jump. She just kept on with her story as though it was nothing new to me. Perhaps she thought I already knew about it. In some of these towns news travels fast especially your personal news that you had wished to keep private. I did my best to not be rattled by her declaration. I noticed her hands were shaking so I calmly reached over to put one hand on top of hers that then seemed to calm her at least for a moment. By this time it was only a few minutes before she was to begin her shift. I suggested that we continue with our stories another day. With that agreement we parted until next Wednesday. Stepping outside into the brisk wind that had arrived unbeknownst to either of us I realized just how good fresh air could feel. I took a quick peek over my shoulder to see her walking into the kitchen carrying our cups and plates. What a burden she has been carrying although I doubt there are few people in town not aware of her plight. Only a strong lady can hold her head up as she smiles her way through her job. No wonder she always appears to be carrying a large load on her shoulders. She has one to carry. As I walked to the bus stop in the morning I noticed my footsteps were much lighter. I wore my winter black boots as it felt and looked like snow was on the way. For a moment I wondered just what has taken my load off my shoulders. Then as I sat looking out the window at the shops as the bus made its way to downtown I realized just what it was. Even if I have it a little tough there is someone else that travels a much more difficult path. Tonight I shall be sure to thank the Lord for what he has given me instead of just asking for more. The man that sat down next to me appeared to have been working outside as he was dusty and dirty from a long day I am sure. Soon he began to snore with his head lolling forward and his mouth wide open. A few stops before mine, Bill the most likeable driver came down the aisle, stopped beside him to give his shoulder a shake. “Alright Jerry this is your stop.” With that Jerry got up and

wandered out the back door stumbling as he went. As the bus began to rumble on I once again sat mesmerized as the small city world flew past the window. engers sat quietly looking out the windows as they reflected upon their busy days. Most were too tired to speak. Going in and out of my mind was the thought if I should share with my children, Wanda’s story. Perhaps not until I have more information. When I opened the front door after my busy day at the store I could smell dinner cooking. Wonder just what we will be served tonight. Luella had made supper once again. Before I had my well-worn brown coat off and hung up, Tito entered the kitchen door exclaiming how hungry he was. That is nothing new. He always is hungry, but at least he will eat anything and everything in his sight. That boy has hollow legs. I am so grateful that both my children have helped pick up the slack with losing Bud. Their hearts are still breaking as I see them trying desperately to be brave. We all miss him so much. Tito is not as eager to do chores that are not assigned to him without a little prodding, but I am grateful that he always brings in the bucket of sawdust after having loaded the hopper. He even lights the stove for Luella when he comes in. When I see them now I wonder where the time has gone. How can they have grown so big in this short while since we moved into this new city. On the farm they were young children running through the tall trees with only the odd sprinkle of worry. On these cold winter days that are creeping up on us so quickly I get reminded of the cold winds on the farm. This time it seems that fall had ed us by. We have gone from sunny cool days with barely any leaves blowing off the tall trees floating to the ground to suddenly there being virtually no leaves remaining on the lonely branches. Seemed as though it happened over night. While the temperature is much warmer the dampness makes it feel cold. The dampness was the first thing Bud noticed when we moved, but we all adjusted quickly. There was to be no whining. This is home.

Chapter Three

Most of the houses did not have proper ventilation to prevent the humid air from being trapped inside thereby causing too much moisture in the air. So far we have not experienced leaky pipes or roofs. With Bud having left us soon that is a frightening thing I try not to even think of. Whatever would I do? Luella makes up for Tito’s lack of reading. Moving here she thought she had found a gold mine. Her friend introduced her to the library. With her library card she is able to bring home up to five books each time. That keeps her busy until the next Saturday when she returns them to take out more. She loves her books and dreams of one day writing one to be placed in the library for others to read. With doing her chores at home and homework she still finds time to read as well as do some chores for a neighbour lady for a few extra coins. A very few. She likes to look after herself. Luella is so independent except for when Tito is there to help her with whatever it may be. He enjoys being the older brother. It brought to mind just how much Bud enjoyed being with our children. Whenever he was home and they were in the house he was happiest when he could just sit and watch them do whatever it was they were into at the moment. The sight of them brought an instant smile to his face. He would say that he was the proudest Daddy of all. Our frigid winters on the farm always seemed long as our outside time was shortened due to the wild animal life preying on us. These days of the freezing windy air kept it to just what was necessary. I can hardly think back to just how cold it was. Forty below was a very cold day while thirty below was a normal winter day. Now in this short time I can barely imagine it. During the time that I was growing up I crept closer to my sister whenever I woke to the sounds of the cries from outdoors. Her comforting arm around my shoulders soon brought me back to my sound sleep. Besides that we kept each other warm. When the snow began to fall it seemed to just pile up higher and higher. While it banked against our slab home we knew this added warmth to the inside. The howl of the wind mixed in with the howling wolves and coyotes made the dark outdoors frightening for the children. From the time they were preschoolers I tried to teach them how to distinguish one from the other. A wolf’s howl is social in nature but also serves to defend their territory against

others. Gray wolves, or often called timber wolves, have a low-pitched howl that is long and drawn out. Their doleful cry seems to define the wolf for most of us. Howling keeps the of a pack physically together. A coyote on the other hand will yip and bark to howls and huffs. Their bark like howl is used when they get serious about a threat. It can be heard for a long distance. I am not sure, in fact I don’t know just how Bud could tell when there was only a lone coyote or wolf as opposed to a pack. A coyote can be confused with a dog. However a coyote has a slender snout, large pointed ears and a bushier tail usually tipped in black. A wolf on the other hand also has long bushy tails that are often black tipped with a little yellow unlike the coyote. Wolves like to disguise themselves by rolling in the excrement of other wild animals with a strong odor. They have a keen sense of smell that usually travels nearly two miles. They are the largest of the wild dog family. At times it was hard for me, just like my mother was concerned that there were times the glass would shatter as they shook in and out in their cold shabby frames from the strong wild winds. Had it broken I could not imagine where we could afford to get another piece of glass to replace it. Now we can just call the Glass Man at Your Service.

A while before Christmas came I was sitting in the lunch room with the usual group chatting of the special treats we would be making for the holidays. Each family had something different and special that had been a tradition for generations. Everything sounded so yummy. By the time our lunch break was over everyone was drooling for Christmas to get here. “Life was certainly different where you lived,” commented one lady the following week as a couple of us stopped to chat in front of the drugstore even though the breeze was strong with a bite to it. “City living is definitely a lot easier. Few of us realize this, and certainly the young people have no idea,” another commented. “That is true, but I am enjoying it as is my family. At the same time I often think how fortunate my children are to have not had an easy carefree life. It has definitely helped them to grow up faster and stronger. Out of necessity they have been able to be independent at a younger age. Life will always be full of bumps and lumps along the way. I have wanted them to have an education and a better life, but not one where everything is handed to them on a platter. Good thing because I cannot do that for them. They will need to make their own way in this busy world,” I said. Gloria, an outspoken lady with a quick wit began saying how her son Ben had told her how Tito had said how he had to chop wood at such a young age and seemed to be so proud of himself. Ben said that the boys at school like to hear Tito talk about his life before coming to the city. “So what do you think of that?” Gloria said she asked Ben. “That is so cool. He was so lucky,” said Ben with a big smile. “Dad would never let me use an axe.” “So one day when Tito came here to visit,” Gloria said. “I asked him about some of his chores which he was happy to tell us about,” Gloria went on to say. “That evening Eugene and I talked about it after our children had all gone to bed. With that we decided that perhaps they needed to see just how much fun it really was.” “As of today we have not been able to get started on our plan,” said Gloria “as we are busy getting our ideas set up.”

“What a great idea!” stated Peggy. “I would like to have my children included in this lesson. There should not be any concessions for bad weather.” “Does anyone else want their children in on it?” asked Gloria. “Yes, let us all do it, but we will need your help Anna,” spoke another lady. So with that ideas were brought together for a two-week period. While some of the things could not be done in the city so substitute ideas came to be. They were sure the neighbours would be happy for the extra help. They were in agreement they were not to receive any money for this since Tito and Luella did not get money. They did it because they were a part of the family. Now their new friends will learn to be a part of a family and a community. Not a word was to be said until it was time to begin. What a surprise they shall get. As I wandered on home iring the houses and cars I began to realize just how different life really has become for my family and I. We are truly enjoying it. I love Canada. Most of our suite was above ground enabling us to see outside. Our bedrooms were small, but each bedroom had a comfortable bed to curl up on after a long day of hard work or play. The living room curtains were a floral colour print with a light tan background. I thought it was a little busy, but at the same time no one could see inside. That was most important to me. The curtains in the bedrooms were plastic with pale blue flowers against a dark brown background giving us privacy. The table was a light brown pine with a drop leaf where one could see initials engraved in the top. I thought this gave it the character of a family having enjoyed many meals there. There were three wood chairs leaving room for two rockers in a dark burgundy with a doily to rest your head on to keep the chair clean. When I really thought about it, it came to my mind that they either really liked brown or they had a good deal on it. This appeared to be a little of both. I frequently remind my children and I just how good we now have life. It could have been the windy day with a cold air flipping around that sent a chill through my bones with the sky showing clouds of heavy white puffs that changed to a light gray as they moved along leaving a message behind that winter is soon coming. This is just another warning in our life. It will be one that we do not always heed.

Spring would soon end leaving us with a beautiful warm summer to enjoy. Buds had turned into fragrant blooms; the wet ground from the thaw has now turned into dry hard packed dirt. Dark clouds in the sky had turned to white fluffy puffs telling their story in a variety of shapes and sizes. The older people would begin to lose their aging pains as the warmth from the bright sun shone upon them. Dogs enjoyed finding a warm sheltered spot to laze about to soak up a few rays. Lazy cats too lay near the sheltered areas enjoying the heat with only a thought of mice running before them. Even the wild grasses gently waved back and forth as though they too were out of energy. I still enjoy visiting these days but only in my mind. It is too close to farm life. Now as I walk about town I see the grass neatly mowed and trimmed. Young girls can be seen twirling their hula-hoops in a beautiful array of colours instead of working in the house helping their mothers. It appears posture and rhythm is everything. The hula-hoop, invented in 1958 is d as I by shops as the best way to hoop your way to fun and fitness. Each one was trying her best to keep her hoop twirling around her waist longer than the others. Some twirled their hoops around their limbs and necks as well. When the day is warm younger boys are seen running around in their cowboy costumes of play pants with plaid shirts chasing each other as some pretend to be the good guy while others are the bad guys falling to the ground when caught. They pretended their guns made from branches were real as they shouted bang! bang! sending the other guy to fall face down on the ground. In their minds their hats were cowboy hats as they raced around on imaginary galloping horses. The young girls sit on the lawns wearing bright coloured shorts with white blouses and barrettes in their hair with the warm sunshine shining down on them with plastic dolls playing house as they chat to their friends about how many children they would have when they grew up. Some were lucky enough to have a mother who could sew to make extra clothes for their dolls. They were the envy of all. If I should be lucky to have a granddaughter I will sew as many doll clothes as I can for her. I have dreamt of having pretty material to make adorable dresses for my granddaughter with matching dresses for her dolls. I would make dainty white pinafores for sure. Pretty nightgowns with sleep hats to match. Maybe I will even have more than one, granddaughter that is. Boys are good too just not

as frilly. One day when I can home from my job Tito and Luella greeted me with wide smiles. This always makes a mother suspicious. “What happened?” I immediately asked. We were now living in a very small suite with Mr. and Mrs. Price that we quickly became very fond of. They were so good to us. It was barely large enough for the three of us, but it was all I could afford. “Nothing,” said Tito. Luella cannot keep a secret. With a look from her brother she never said a word. In seconds she turned and looked over near the far wall where a treadle sewing machine sat. “I did not tell,” she immediately said. I felt my legs go all rubbery. Looking at Tito I saw a son who could no longer keep his exhilaration to himself. There was that give away smile of his all across his face. The only thing I noticed was that my easy chair was moved. Just as I began to ask why he moved my chair I noticed it. “So Mom. Do you like it?” he asked. “It’s beautiful, but how did it get here and from where?” Now I had to sit down. I felt so weak that they had to laugh. “Gee Mom. Are you all right? It is only a sewing machine. It belonged to Mrs. Price. Then a few years ago when she no longer used it Mr. Price stored it in the shed with the spiders. You when I started hanging out with Mr. Price not long after we moved here in the shed do you not? That is when we dug it out because Mrs. Price wanted to give it to you. “Yes son. I sure do. Thank you for all the work you did helping Mr. Price. I did not know you were so good at keeping secrets. And Luella kept the secret too!” The smile on her face said just how proud she was of herself. “I will be so busy sewing I will not have time for anything else in the evenings.” “By the way Mom, there is no tooth fairy either,” he said with that mischievous look on his face as he turned away. I know my son. He likes to stir up a little

commotion. As usual I was going to go directly to the kitchen to prepare something for our dinner. Tonight I just wanted to ire my gift. First I shall run upstairs to show my appreciation to a generous lady. Luella came in to set the table. Still wearing that smile. We talked about how much I loved their surprise and how she was now able to keep a secret. Tomorrow may be different. We quietly sat down and ate our dinner of meatballs, potatoes and beans each in our own thoughts of the day. Before we left the table we each shared what was new on this day. Today I said nothing. It was their turn and mine to just listen as I ired my loving family. Together Luella and I washed the dishes and put them away. I finished setting things out for the morning just in time to hear Tito call me into the living area. Tito had finished cleaning and polishing our shoes for the next day. Bud had a thing for clean shoes so they had been taught well. They quickly completed the other few chores so we could all be finished for the evening. What now does he want I suddenly thought. I want to be finished so I can sit my weary bones down for a while and ire my gift. I could tell that Tito had something to say that he just could not hold any longer. “Mom, you should have seen all the spiders in the corner. Did you know that spiders eat insects? That is what Mr. Price said. Cleaning them and the mess they leave behind is a yucky job. Then I helped get all the dust and grime and stuff off it. We worked really hard cleaning and polishing it up. Then one day when I came home from school he told me how he found some varnish that he coated the wood with. That sure made it look like new. Do you not think so? He oiled and greased all the parts to make it run as smooth as a new car. It is all ready for you to use. Mrs. Price even gave you her cloth that she had left over. Do you like it Mom?” “Yes I do. They could not have given me a better gift or one that I need more. Now I can catch up on my mending so much quicker and easier. Did you say Mrs. Price gave me some cloth too?” With that Tito and Luella disappeared quickly returning from Tito’s room with a pile of cloth and a box that rattled. Luella was just as excited as I was to look it

over and over again. There were even some loose pretty buttons in the box with the threads. If only my mother was still here to see this. As a reward once in a while I will suggest we go to the corner store for a creamsicle. This was an orange flavoured Popsicle with vanilla ice cream in the middle. The mind behind this delicious summer indulgence was an eleven-yearold boy. Tito seemed to mention that to me quite often, and I did not mind hearing it. I often thought this was such a brilliant idea. Most everyone, especially me, loved this summer treat. Tonight I felt we deserved to celebrate. We would bring one home for each Mr. And Mrs. Price. It was a couple months later after church that an older lady came up to me. I did notice her before. After apologizing profusely for my ignorance she just laughed as she tried to say she was not offended. She did not recognize me until I was pointed out to her the previous week. Seems we just do not run in the same circle. It could probably be an age thing. This lady said she had been told by Carol Price the story of the sewing machine. Now Clara Hill is beginning to clear out her closets. It appears that within the next while they will need to move into a care home in the city in order to be nearer to their children should they require assistance. “If you are not offended,” said Clara “I would like to give it to you as I clean out. There is material there for boys’ shirts as well as dresses for that cute little Luella. She is so cute. Reminds me of when my daughter was little. I did tell the people at the second-hand store they could have the sewing machine when the time came.” “That is quite alright Mrs. Hill,” I said. “But I am so grateful for the material if you have no one else to share with. I do not wish to be greedy.” “No, there is no one that is interested so I am very happy to have connected with you. You know men, that husband of mine, as much as I love him keeps telling me to get rid of it so we don’t have to move it too. And one more thing, please call me Clara. I also think there is a soft ball somewhere in that stuff. I shall give it to Tito if he does not already have too many.” “He does not have a ball at all so you will have made a friend for life. I know he has been wanting one but there is always something that calls for our money.” With that we parted company for the day so she could walk home with her

husband.

Chapter Four

Each Wednesday when Wanda and I met there had not been an opportunity to discuss anything private. Either it was too busy or someone else was stopping by our table to say hello. This coming Sunday afternoon all our children were going to be busy with their friends so we promptly made it a time to meet at her home for a couple hours in the afternoon. As I stepped through the doorway I could feel the warmth generating from my new friend. It was genuine and heartfelt giving me a warm cozy feeling. Their small suite at the back of an older home painted in a warm white with a subtle blue trim gave the look of elegance. It was a simple home with just enough extras to give it the look of having been thoughtfully cared for. Most of all it was cozy. We sat at the table covered with the popular red and white checked oilcloth that showed no sign of wear as mine does. The linoleum floor covering was washed and waxed to a beautiful shine. The small black diamond pattern imprinted onto a beige background had a few wear spots near the door. This was to be expected. I noticed her pretty curtains as soon as I entered. Like mine they were small flowers on a plastic material. As I took my first bite from the oatmeal raisin cookie she had just baked the previous day, Wanda began to tell me of her life as wife to Curtis. The best part of it was her sons, John and Charles. “They are clearly the light of my life,” she said. “Actually they always will be.” “I understand that. I am not sure how I would manage if I did not have Tito and Luella. But do continue with your story.” “When we were first married Curtis was the perfect husband or so I thought. Right from the beginning it appeared he was so happy to come home from work where we could be together. Curtis helped me around the house. I became pregnant on the night we were married, I am sure. Being young and naive I never thought anything of it whenever I bumped into anyone I knew and they began to ask me how I like being married to Curtis. They were just being friendly, I thought. One time I noticed one of the women giving another a strange look as they listened to me speak of my wonderful husband, and how fortunate I felt I was to

have him. As we chatted another time I mentioned how sorry I felt for Curtis as he dutifully visited his father in the next town every Saturday. That poor man is so ill, I thought,” said Wanda. “ ‘I did not know his father was ill,’ stated Lois in surprise. “I looked up just in time to see Rita poke her in the ribs giving Lois to jump a little. It was clear she had just realized she had said something she should not have. Now the cat was out of the bag and I instantly knew they were privy to some information that I needed to know. “I did not probe. I just outwardly asked what that was about. I need to know what they knew about Curtis that no one wanted me to know. Suddenly they looked like a group of sullen clams. One by one they excused themselves as they had work to do at home leaving me standing there pregnant and baffled. It was clear something was not as I thought it was and I was going to find out. “During the next few weeks as I asked uncomfortable questions that finally prompted one lady to say, ‘Wanda, we all really like you and wish you the best, but this is not anything any of us feel we should disclose. Sorry.’ “As she walked away I began to think about who did know and would tell me. It would not be any of the neighbours. As much as some of them liked to share just everything before anyone else can they had suddenly become tight lipped. This must be serious I said to myself. “After a sleepless night I knew just who would know. “ ‘So Father,’ I began, ‘I have a big problem and I feel sure that you are the best one to help me.’ “ ‘Of course Wanda. If I can I surely will. Should we pray first? I feel pray helps a discussion to go smoothly.’ “While I said yes I was thinking that perhaps this one is not going to be so smooth. I am going to refuse to leave before I get answers. “ ‘Now Wanda, what is your question?’ asked Father.

“ ‘Actually it is not just one question, but likely a series of questions. I need to sort my mind out.’ “ ‘Certainly. Now what is bothering you?’ Father asked clearly not having any idea what lay ahead. The whole town thought we were deeply in love. So did I for that matter. Frankly I have been thinking just how naive they thought I was. They will see. “After explaining the drift of my conversations with community ladies he began to go red in the face. Father was a tall man of medium build always appearing to be confident and genuinely friendly. Father spoke with a caring sincere voice. Ready to help each and every one of his flock. Well, now it is time for this lamb to get some answers that he appears to have. “ ‘So Father, just what is the real Curtis? What kind of trouble has he been in that everyone feels the need to cover for him? I am here today to get some straight honest answers so I will not have to go to the police station.’ “By now he was stuttering and shaking as he shifted in his chair. He was beet red around the collar that suddenly seemed too tight for him. “ ‘I have lots of time Father. I am going nowhere until I get the truth out. The truth that I should have been told before we married. I now have a child on the way and I want to know just what lies ahead for us. If you wish I can give you reasons besides that as to why I feel things are not right.’ “ ‘It was before you came to our community so there never was a need to tell you anything that Curtis did not wish to share,’ Father began. ‘I truly thought he had changed as he had promised he would. There were no outwardly signs that he had not until just after you were married. If you like Wanda I will speak to him again.’ “ ‘So what would you be speaking to him about?’ I asked without wavering. “ ‘Now Wanda I am not sure Curtis wishes me to discuss this with you as our talks are confidential.’ “ ‘If that is your decision I am then off to the police station,’ I said as I got up. ‘As his wife I have a right to know just what kind of marriage I am in. Is my life in danger?’

“With no answer coming I started for the door. ‘You know Wanda, sometimes it is better some things are not known.’ “ ‘Not with me!’ With that I left loudly closing the door behind me. “ ‘Well,’ said the officer in a tone that told me he did not know just how to answer. As my luck had it, his superior came walking past. Seeing how upset and angry I was he stopped in his tracks looking from me to his officer and back. “ ‘Do we have a problem here?’ he asked. “ ‘Yes we do. I am Wanda Allen the wife of Curtis Allen.’ Now I knew I had struck a chord. “As he stammered a little while he ushered me into his office as his face turned the colour of milk. Closing the door behind me he asked, ‘Is there anything I can get you?’ “ ‘Yes there is! I want some honest answers now. Why is everyone covering for my husband? No one wishes to say anything. It is very apparent to me they know something that I would not be happy about. As his wife I have good reason to know. Now I ask you politely, please be straight-forward from the beginning. Does he have a record, has he killed someone, is he a thief? Just what is it?’ “ ‘I wondered just when and if you would come calling. Yes there are happenings that any wife would be upset about and rightly so. I tried to get Curtis to be honest with you before your marriage, but he can be very stubborn and violent when pushed. I think you will need to share with me your life with Curtis so I can fill you in.’ “ ‘In other words you are cautious to not disclose anything I may not be suspicious of instead of telling me everything,’ I said in an indignant voice. “ ‘No Mrs. Allen I will share with you all you wish to know. I promise.’ “ ‘Curtis has no idea what life for me has been like,’ I said feeling embarrassed. ‘He knows nothing of the real Silas, a Swine!’ “When we first married he said he had found some work for me,” Wanda said to

me. “I needed to help out as his wages were not as large as they had been. Mr. Powell at the feed store had to cut back to keep the store open. This job was close enough that I could walk to and from work. Silas will pay us good money. When I asked what type of work he said house cleaning. ‘Silas just might have some mending for you to take home. I am sure he will pay extra. He has lost his wife to diphtheria, a highly infectious disease of the respiratory tract.’ I did not even know Curtis knew such big words. Guess Silas told him. “ ‘Each morning as I think of Silas a large knot forms in the pit of my stomach. I want to throw up, but there is no time for that. I am always rushing to get there in time so I do not need to perform extra services to keep him from docking my pay. “ ‘I wondered if I should tell him just what all I need to do for my pay, but I am too ashamed. Curtis will feel I have disgraced him. Being such a gentleman I am sure he can not even fathom what some men are like.’ As I said that I noticed the officer taking a deep breath as he was trying to regain himself. Did I say something I should not have thereby triggering a dangerous memory? ‘Each night I bring home mending from his neighbour to be returned on my way to work in the morning. I have frequently tried to talk to Curtis about finding a different job, but the conversation ends with telling me how I should be grateful for a great man like Silas. He pays us well. Yes, I agree he does but must I pay such a high price for my wages?’ “As I walked home feeling more and more anxious of the conversation I just had with the officer, old feelings began to return. I knew then I had to tell it like it is for the sake of my sons. Were these things something that I am making too much of? Curtis is forever telling me not to be a prude. While I say I just wish to be respected I feel there is more to all this than Curtis wishes me to know and feel. Just what is in Curtis’ life? “ ‘Everyone in town knows what a tyrant Silas is,’ said Father to me a couple days later. ‘Our congregation has been very worried about you working for him. No one judges you for the decisions you must make. I do have another job for you, but there will need to be some adjustments in order for you to change jobs.’ “ ‘That sounds very good Father. I also want to know all about the man I am living with. How can I be a loyal wife to someone who does not respect me? Please Father, tell me about my husband. No one is brave enough to say

anything. Is he a womanizer? Just what is he? I am so afraid my sons will hear something at school. I know boys can be cruel with their harsh remarks and they do love to tease and torment their peers.’ “ ‘Because you have two sons that will soon be nearing their teen years it probably is best I am straight with you. You are absolutely correct. Someone will sooner than later say something to give them to wonder what really happened, and if there is more that is being kept from them. “ ‘Now mark my words, Curtis will be enraged should he find out of our conversation. But you are correct your sons will need to be told the truth. It will take some careful planning on your part as to just what and how you shall share it with them. After all, he is their father. Often the children will take the side of the difficult parent as children usually have a need to protect the one they feel is not being treated fairly. I feel it is important that I share this conversation with the Senior Officer just in case he finds a way to get violent.’ “As I traipsed on home following my meeting with Father I could not believe all he said, and yet I knew it had to be true. He would not make this up. I could feel goose bumps ri my back. My stomach was beginning to churn. I knew there were some people with a double personality but my Curtis? That can not be. It is one thing for someone to some day say he likes something when the next day he does not, but this is much more than that. I know I cannot turn a blind eye to this man nor will I remain a wife to him but first I need to hear him out. Just how much will he lie to me? I want to look him in the eye when I talk to him. Perhaps I should arrange a sleepover at someone’s home for my boys, but who and when? I need to know soon before I go crazy with worry and frustration. “It seems as though God has a plan for us. Two days later I received a call from my parents. Grandpa wants the boys to go fishing with him. It would be an overnight stay. I was ecstatic on one side, but on the other I became more nervous. Would I be as brave when he stands before me shouting furiously as he does over so many little things. Would John and Charles be excited or suspicious? What if they start asking me questions? Without giving anything away I said that I was feeling as though I really needed a little break from them so I hope they will agree to visiting with you and Grandpa. “ ‘Tell them I will make donuts for them and pancakes with Saskatoon berry topping just for them if they promise to come,’ said my mother. ‘And do not

worry dear, we will send their bus fare. John will be fine to care for Charles for that short ride.’ “Even on the phone my mother could see through me, and my fears. We did not live far apart but without a car we had to take a bus. Now when I think about it Curtis never left me any spare change at home saying he will take care of it when he returns. Now the bells are beginning to ring. I am waking up at last. “That night I shared this news with my sons. Much to my relief they were both so excited. ‘How soon can we go?’ asked John. ‘I think next weekend suits them both,’ I said. ‘They are so anxious to just have a little time alone with you, and Grandpa seems to need it most. He seems to be getting old faster than Grandma.’ Do not say too much I chided myself because that is always when I give something away. Now I must work on my plan I thought to myself as I felt a slight quake in my knees. “Finally the day arrived when they would board the bus that would take them directly to Grandmother’s house. They would not return until Sunday evening after supper. I told Curtis I was making his favourite supper, fried chicken so do not be late. ‘I will not be my sweet,’ he replied trying to be calm and nonchalant. I knew him too well. “Clearly this was not fitting in with his plan as he usually is late on a Friday night. As I handed him his lunch at the door I gave him my sweetest smile as I rubbed his back just the way he likes before putting his jacket on. I knew that what I had planned was not going to be what he anticipated. It was clear this was mes his plans for the evening. “When he arrived home a little later than necessary the house was filled with the delicious aroma of chicken with fresh dill cooking. An apple pie sat waiting on the cupboard by the open window to cool. The table was set for him at one end and me at the opposite end. The fragrant smell of fresh coffee filled the room. “I carefully set the dishes on the table for him to help himself. As I began to pour coffee he said, ‘Shouldn’t we be having wine tonight? You know how I love my red wine with dinner.’ “By now I was shaking so much I was sure he could see right through my charade ‘No, tonight we shall have our wine later. Tonight we shall just talk while we eat,’ I said never looking away from his nervous face. His eyes began

to tour the kitchen but I kept on talking. I knew I was rambling as I did my best to not appear as nervous as he was or as I felt. Now is the time. If I do not speak up now I never will. I gritted my teeth as I took a deep breath permanently plastering a calm look on my face. “ ‘So, I have been wondering what keeps you so busy at work that you must stay late so often?’ I innocently asked. “ ‘Oh, we are just so busy each day that I need to catch up. Do not worry. I will catch up soon.’ “Ignoring his last comment I quietly said, ‘If you are so busy how do you manage all that time with Jeanie and Tina? Is that where all your money goes? Buying them pretty bracelets? Tina does like pink. She said that the pink one is her favourite. The one she got from her boyfriend, but she could not tell me his name because he said not to. Now is that not strange?’ “My knees were shaking under the tablecloth as my voice got louder and louder by the second. I would not look away. I felt my chin quivering. No, I will not cry. So help me I will not. To look into his eyes as they became more infuriated all the time calling me a liar now as he began to scream at the top of his voice. I recognized the familiar pitch of that voice. “From the corner of my eye I saw his fingers slowly moving towards the peppershaker. I was waiting for the moment he would strike sending it hurling across the table like a flying rocket. With barely a second to spare I held my dinner plate in front of my face letting the chicken slide off onto my dress only to enrage him more. “He shouted so loud the spit was running down his chin as he called me b#!*h, s#!*t, and everything else that came out of his mouth as fast and loud as possible. Suddenly he began throwing the dishes at the walls landing on the floor in dozens of pieces. ‘There goes your dishes that you loved so much,’ he shouted at me as more came hurling towards me. All I could do was cover my face with my arms. I had never seen a man so incensed that he was seething like a mad dog throwing everything in his reach. Then he moved to the cupboard pulling the remainder of the dishes out to land onto the floor as they too broke into pieces. “Little did he know how much I hated those ugly dishes. All these years he thought he had pulled the wool over my eyes, but now this laugh will be on him.

“I had wanted a decent set of dishes that I could be proud to use when someone came. Perhaps most of all for my mother. Every mother wished for her daughter to have nice things in her home. “When I opened the box I thought what ugly dishes but not wanting to hurt his feelings I said how lovely they are as I thought maybe bit by bit the children will break them. To this day not one has gotten broken. “It was some time later that I visited the Red & White Store in town. I liked that store but it was just too far to walk carrying my purchases so I remained a customer of the general store. As I browsed through the store I noticed a few pieces of the dishes just like mine. I stared at them. How could they be so cheap? I had never seen dishes for so little before so I asked. “ ‘Well a while back a man came in asking to buy a set of dishes for his sister that he was going to visit. He had very little money and it didn’t matter what they looked like. I ordered these because they were the lowest price I had ever seen. He promised he would take them all. There was no way anyone would even stop to look at those dishes because they are so ugly. That poor woman that received them. I felt just sick to my stomach that some dear lady should have these. One place setting had some pieces broken so I am left with these. Soon they will go into the garbage.’ Now I knew why Curtis told me they had mistakenly sent one place setting less. When the other comes in he will get it for me.

“With a faint shake of my head I suddenly came to my senses telling me to run for the door, but Curtis was too fast for me. His fury seemed to spur him on. He grabbed me by my hair pulling me into the room. As I screamed for my life I fought back as much as my slight frame would do against his six-foot stocky build. “Just as I stumbled he grabbed a table lamp swinging it at me, but my fall saved me. I do not know what I tripped over. It was just enough to make him call me more names thereby distracting him for a second. Instead the lamp landed against the window breaking it into small pieces. Now he was on top of me kicking me in the ribs telling me what an ugly b#!*h I am. “I tried to scream for help but not sure if I could make a sound for anyone to hear as his brutal kicking continued. As my world became black I felt there was someone else there. Someone that would save me. “The next day I woke in the hospital. My eyes were so swollen I could not see. The nurse was beside me telling me not to move as she placed fresh ice packs on my face. ‘Do you know your name?’ she asked. ‘Wanda,’ came my weak reply that was barely audible. Then the black curtain fell down across my world once more. “It was two more days before I woke to a room that appeared to be full of fog with everyone talking as though they had just sucked in some helium from a balloon. My family was all there except for Curtis. My eyes quickly searched the room just to be sure there was no sign of him. Just the thought of him makes me shudder with disgust. It revolted me to think I had shared a life with that beast. “John and Charles both stood solemnly at the foot of my bed. Their eyes were red and swollen. Never had I wanted to have them put between their parents but now it was too late. Neither one spoke. When I asked them if they had any questions they just barely shook their heads and sniffled some more as they drew themselves closer to their grandmother’s arms. “In the following weeks that I spent in the hospital the Chief of Police made it his mission to see what else he has been involved in. Curtis’ calling card was telling a story that sounded familiar to him only not all his victims survived. What kind of animal had I married and how could he still be loose walking around to prey on other women?

“Slowly things are starting to make sense. He had extremely few friends saying it was because he had been too busy working. Working at what? He never wanted anyone to visit. For some kind of strange reason he always saw something wrong with my friends discouraging me from spending time chatting with them. I was so blindsided by his charm that I am now embarrassed by my naivety. My friends must think that I am just plain stupid. “Two more weeks dragged by until I was released from hospital. My awake time was spent thinking of this terrible situation I let myself fall into. I not only feel embarrassed but humiliated. My husband was in jail. My sons were home, but deeply distraught. “My mother had moved in with us to keep some semblance of a normal life if for no one else but for John and Charles. My father had remained at their home to continue to work. Along with of the church they were clearly ing us with both their kindness and generosity. Welcome prayers were flowing in.” Wanda told me how the red and blue on her face and arms had now turned to a yellow and green. Her ribs were beginning to mend, but still every bone in her body felt as though it was in a million tiny brittle pieces. She felt as though she had been punched and battered within an inch of her life. Apparently she really had. The doctor told her she was lucky to have survived. It is beyond my comprehension how anyone that has been treated so cruelly could put it behind her even if it is in order to encourage her sons to live a better life as they put this horror behind them. They are all learning to trust once again. On top of that John and Charles have the shame of a father serving time in jail to deal with. My heart breaks for each of them. Will they ever recover? Will they ever be able to fully trust again? While Curtis is serving time for attempting to kill Wanda even if it was in a fit of rage, his lawyer tried to say he was not in his right mind. Well, I guess not but all the same, “jail is too good for such a demon,” as one witness said with so much hate he had to be reminded to remain seated. As I walked home in disbelief later in the afternoon I could not really take in all Wanda chose to share. It shall be days before I completely finish revisiting her life of terror. As she spoke I felt the horror building up in my stomach. I tasted

bile as it rose in my throat. It was easy to see she had a need to share that heavy burden as she let it all tumble out of her, word after word. I need to to make time for my friend. Already Bud seems like an angel that was taken from us much too soon. No wonder my mother always said there were people with worse problems than yours. Wow!! Was she ever right? But then mothers usually are.

The crops and gardens flourished. The bountiful harvest filled everyone’s faith in the predicted cold winter to come with enough food to feed their families. A perfect summer was in sight. Some days later I was standing next to the rows of cabbage and beans that were ready to pick as I ired the wild Switch Grass growing not far away. I loved watching the green and white long blades as they swayed in the cool breeze. Even though the blades fell into a tangled jungle they looked so carefree and buoyant. The evening sky was beautiful to see with the dark blue clouds rolling into the still pale blue tufts. From past years this told me I should seriously begin to harvest my garden. It is a lot of work having a garden, but it has been good for me. It helps me with stretching my paycheck. We eat better I think. Tito and Luella frequently grumble when they are asked to help me weed the large garden, but once they get started they forget and a cheerful chatter erupts. I plant two extra rows of peas that they can have for their fresh picking whenever they wish. That is two rows they tend with the best of care. Just in this last season they have begun to take pride in our garden without requiring prompting. While I don’t like them bragging I do turn a deaf ear whenever I overhear a little of that regarding the garden. For some reason or other not everyone is able to enjoy the fruits of a garden. Most of all, this is the time that I spend alone in my thoughts as well as alone with Bud. We always shared everything with each other. We kept no secrets. We told each other how much we loved our family. We both spoke of how difficult our days were and why. How our tired bodies ached at the end of the day. How proud and blessed we were of our life. We slept in each other’s arms. God has certainly been there for us. When I completed rereading my letters in my mind from Buds family over and over my mind went back to a few weeks ago. My thoughts had been deep into their letters as I briskly walked home, I was not aware of the storm moving in so quickly until my hat went flying off in the wind leaving me to give chase. By the time I managed to catch up to it, it had landed in the wettest spot on the road ahead. I snatched it up before giving it a chance to move on, but not before it took a good soaking. I will need to hang it near the stove with a sawdust burner to dry so I can brush it out before going to bed.

This was my only hat. It was my church hat, my funeral hat, my visiting hat, and my work hat, and anything else I might require a hat for. It not only kept my hair in place, it kept my head warm during the cold winter weather. When I got home I wasn’t sure if I should set my hat to dry first or my hair. With my mind nearly made up Tito and Luella came in taking one look at me Tito said, “Wow Mom! You are a mess. What happened to you? Did you get in a fight?” I was sure I did not look that bad until I checked myself out in the bathroom mirror. Then I had to laugh. “You are right Tito, I am a mess, but no, the only fight I had was with Mr. Wind on my way home.” Standing there with a serious look on his face for a minute he said, “Ya, Mr. Wind can be a tough old bugger.” “Tito! That is not a word I like you to use. When you are grown up you can go out behind the shed and use it, but until then not in here. Understand?” “Sorry,” came a quiet reply as he continued to look me over obviously not sure just what to make of my new look. I am sure they were both trying their best not to laugh. I did learn a lesson from Mr. Wind though. Since my purse is not overflowing with money I shall carry my kerchief in it should the moment arise that I may need it again.

Even though I have read and read the letters from Gus and Hannah I am still trying to comprehend it all. How can this be I wondered. Hannah was the liveliest and most healthy person I have ever known. Always be positive and always full of life. But here she clearly writes an unsettling story. I try to not read them every night, but I cannot leave them alone. Whenever I am walking they play through my mind. My extra pennies I use for stamps. The first few times I read them I could barely see through my tears. We had always said the other was our sister of heart as neither of us had a sister by birth. The only one I had had been born sleeping. When Hannah and I met we instantly bonded just as though we had always known the other.

Dear Sister Anna It is my turn to visit my friendly doctor. Not that of someone else. Following an examination with many questions, he sent me to the hospital for some tests. Little did I know that when I was there he had itted me. It was Easter weekend. Every doctor was away for the weekend and so I sort of patiently waited it out having many tests for him to peruse on his return. I was bored. The days dragged on. A few days later he confirmed it was a kidney issue. One that was causing them to not work properly. This could be a disease that affected most patients in my age group. Only a biopsy can tell for sure. Tuesday morning I was sitting calmly in his waiting room while I waited my turn absently turning pages in a magazine that lay among the pile on a table next to where I sat. As I was being fitted into his busy schedule the wait was long but well worth it. I knew I was fortunate to have an appointment at all. He was the best kidney specialist around. Besides, he owed my family doctor a favour. Dr. Torres was a tall slim man that rarely smiled. In his soft spoken way he was all business. While he had a pleasant bed-side manner he was clearly a man of few words. There was no idle chit-chat. He would need to take a biopsy. For this I would need to be checked in to the Royal Columbian Hospital on Columbia

Street, New Westminster. This he wanted done right away. I would need to remain there either for one or two nights. This wouldn’t be exciting but I agreed. After a blood test and getting settled in my bed nurses were in and out taking my blood pressure along with everything else they could think of. Nearing the end of the workday Dr. Torres came in. A couple words to say that it would be the next afternoon before a room was available to him to perform the procedure. Without another word he left the examining room leaving me to wonder just what was going to happen. Upon his return he handed me a form with instructions for the hospital. I was to report in right away before I should lose the bed he had on hold for me. My evening there was spent in a corner bed near the door along with three other patients. Two were ladies, but the other was a retired doctor. He wanted a private room explaining to the nurses he knew what all goes on during the night. He needed his rest he repeated to no avail. Finally the head nurse had had enough I guess and informed him that now he was a patient not a doctor. With that she turned on her heals and left the room. After sulking and muttering to himself for a while he turned his light off so he could sleep. And so could we. The following morning the breakfast call came at seven. Each of us was served a portion of hot oatmeal porridge, toast, and a dish of fruit. Beverage was coffee, black with cream and sugar on the side. Minutes later we all knew that the Doctor thought he does not eat oatmeal. He eats bacon and eggs for breakfast. “Not in here,” the head nurse informed him. Another lady complained she did not like the way her bread was toasted and she always had rye bread. Again, the head nurse to the rescue. “In here that is how it came today. White bread only as that is what all your doctors have ordered.” If they actually had we never knew. Shortly before noon I was wheeled out into a small room that had a table with a monitor on it. Silly me. I stated out loud that I would be able to watch just as the doctor entered. With a sneaky smile he said, “no you will not because I will be in the way.” They turned me on my side so I was facing away from the monitor. As the doctor was explaining to me just what was needed to be done, he froze my kidney area.

As he had told me he would talk to me, but I was not to talk to him. Before I knew it the process was over, and I was once again wheeled back into my ward. The one with the grumpy doctor lay opposite me. Arriving back to my bed I was brought a light supper of vegetable soup and toast. A cup of warm tea sat on the tray beside a digestive cookie. Now I am not a tea drinker, but he is according to the nurse so all his patients receive tea following their procedures. Dr. Torres believes it is good for the tummy. So tea I had. Did I enjoy it? No. Did I drink all of it? Yes. I just knew that the nurse would be recording it on my chart along with other important information. I was not ready for a lecture that was sure to come. After a fairly comfortable sleep that night I waited once more for Dr. Torres to come in to check on me. He insisted he see me before I dressed. That would be somewhere around ten in the morning. The other patients were able to discharge themselves when they were dressed. They did not have Dr. Torres. I felt good about his thoroughness. I knew I was in good hands. After my surgery and the following night the nurse came in every three hours to help me turn. While at my bedside my vitals were carefully checked and recorded. For now I shall sign off. I promise I shall write of my next adventure. Please try not to worry. Your loving sister, Hannah

I can hardly believe what my eyes are reading. Tomorrow I shall look for a pretty card to send her. Maybe it will cheer her up. My mind will not rest until I receive another word from her.

Hello Anna. I will get to the point.

The following week I went to his office where he informed me that I had a kidney disease. It was called Nephrotic Syndrome. For the next three months I am to take the prescribed dosage of prednisone each day. Each morning I am to check my urine for any signs of too much protein. And so it begins. After a few months the pain in my kidneys will subside. I shall wait and see. Gus is very good picking up the heavy duties from me that I had been cautioned to not do before Dr. Torres released me from this limited amount of exercise. We are so fortunate to have such caring and loving husbands. Someone trained those brothers well.

Yes, I thought. Someone had. I feel so bad that we do not live closer like we did when we first arrived in Canada. Then I would be able to lend a helping hand and a soothing ear.

It was but a week later that I once again sat in his office to receive the results of the biopsy. Not good. I was so disappointed. My heart fell. My head was swimming. I tried my best to concentrate on his words and not my possible fate. Sometimes this is difficult to do. After a run down on the disease he softly told me there wasn’t much that could be done. Prednisone, a synthetic drug was used with some success to rejuvenate the kidneys. The only other options were to take dialysis or just let nature run its course. I agreed to take this new drug. The one with many side effects. The side effects will be mainly weight gain and insomnia. Neither one do I really need or want, but . . . Over the next couple years I can expect to spend two and three nights wide awake to then spend the following day and night asleep. There will be no regulating my sleep time. The weight gain will come along with it no matter what I eat. It will also change my metabolism for good. Apparently over a short period of time I will go from the undernourished look to the well fed look. Along

with this will need to come a new wardrobe. I have always heard that in everything there is something good. Mine will be a new attire, but I am too tired to shop. Each morning when I arise the first thing is to check will be my weight and then test my urine for protein. My progress is closely followed by blood work and regular phone calls from the doctor at the hospital who tested my blood. After a year I should have three months or more when my protein levels will be normal, but then once again it may rise and rise some more. Should that happen I will be where they can no longer prescribe prednisone again. Then I will once again need to make a rash decision. This time cyclophosamide, a chemo drug, go on dialysis or let nature take its course will be my options. For now I will have much to think about. Of course, he said not to worry until I need to. I wish it would be as easy to take such advice as to hand it out. Since this drug is still on trial. Dr. Torres thought it could be time to go on the transplant list. This is a long waiting list at best. After using my five minutes to decide I thought I would stick to my decision to go with the drug. If that didn’t work then it would just be up to God to do what he felt was best. I trust that all is well with you and your family. I promise to drop you a line if there are any changes. Love to all from Gus and Hannah

Hibbard’s was going well. I have come to love this job even more than I ever thought I would. Imagine, this poor little farm girl working in a department store. The staff and management were very nice. Each one did their part of the little extras over and above their particular jobs. When I first began working there I was in the shoe department for three days. Then I was asked to fill in with the dress goods department. I liked the feel of the beautiful fabrics there but what a mess to clean up each morning as well as throughout the day as time provided. It seemed as though every mother brought her children with her as well as those in the neighbourhood. They ran between the large bolts of fabric as they played hide and seek with the other children. No matter how much we politely asked them not to, the game continued. While we warned them and their mothers that one of the large bolts would fall on them no one listened until the inevitable happened. A full bolt of heavy fabric fell on a rambunctious loud young lad with a strong set of lungs. He drew enough attention for customers from elsewhere on the floor to come over to see if there was a serious accident. After taking a look at him the answer was the same. Oh, it is just the Green boy leaving as they shook their heads. One day a lady left saying loud enough to be heard, “Someone should teach that mother how to train her children.” While we all agreed with her it was not good store business to comment. Just smile and clean up. We never knew just when the store supervisor would be patrolling in our area. The staff was to adhere to a strict dress code as well as display a polite and friendly manner to each customer. Besides I not only needed this job I enjoyed it. I enjoyed working with the public. Most customers were ever so nice and friendly. It gave me a feeling of pride each time I assisted a customer with measuring out the material required for her project be it curtains or a new dress. To me this was more fun than work and I got paid for it. I had made friends here.

Our lunchroom was fairly large. Large enough that ten people could sit at each round table. The conversations were light and funny. Sometimes I laughed so hard my insides hurt. The best part was that I was making friends even though these people did not work in the same department as I did. While the place I saw them was at work, my breaks were the only time I had a chance for visiting anyway. Stories were often told about happenings in other departments. It was not just the one I worked in that was a little crazy at times especially when it was full moon. This seemed to bring out the weirdest side in some people. We came to know which customers would be in the store that day and what to expect. I never gave it a thought but a nice-looking man from the office usually sat next to me. I heard that he worked in another one of Hibbard’s stores coming to this one every once in a while for a couple days. No one seemed to know just what he did. For some reason most everyone sat in the same spot each time. I was the only one in my department that was on break at this particular time. Once again I had been moved. This time I was moved to the drapery department. For some reason most clerks had difficulty determining how much fabric the customers needed for a specific curtain. They always came in with rough, sometimes very rough window measurements. To me this was a fun challenge. Only once did I sell a lady too much material. She of course brought it back wanting a refund on it. With the managers approval we gave her the extra money we thought she had spent. Bundled the large piece into a neat package and placed it in the odds and ends basket. Soon it sold for what I do not know just that some lady had a use for it. All was not lost or wasted. When break time was over we all went our separate ways. As the drapery department was upstairs I took the elevator and so did Louis. I was not aware of anyone’s last name so it made no matter to me that Louis’ name was the same as Mr. Moore seeing as it was a popular name around town. Something I had not noticed. All the ladies were clearly giving him the eye to which he seemed to not pay any attention. Louis was about five foot ten or eleven of medium build. His dark wavy hair gave him a very debonair charm to go with his friendly smile that he always wore. With his dark brown eyes and a straight nose that turned down slightly, he

looked like a sophisticated French man in his stylish suits. Most of all he was a perfect gentleman. I had to agree with Nancy. He was dashing. I did notice that whenever he ed us the rest of the staff would look from Louis to me, and back again with a sneaky smile as though they shared a secret. Louis had a way of including everyone in the conversation, especially me. I was the quiet one of the group. He just naturally made everyone feel important. Their opinion was important to him. After washing my hands at the sink provided, I just gave the others a friendly smile as I said hello quickly sitting down on my usual chair. I knew it was my chair because the top of the back had someone’s initials scratched in it. Nancy sat across from me. No matter what the day’s discussion was about I did not contribute other than to in the laughter or when I was directly spoken to. One day when Nancy and I were both on the elevator as we headed down to the lunchroom, she took hold of my arm giving me a little tug. “You know, Anna, I think Louis is sweet on you.” “Oh Nancy,” I laughed. “He is not! He hardly pays any attention to me.” “Oh yes he does. Yesterday I ducked out of getting on the same elevator as you to let you be alone with him. He took advantage of the moment you entered the elevator to put his hand on your back. I saw that special sweet smile he gave you as he looked into your eyes. Did he hold your hand? Kiss you? Ask you for a date? I bet he did!” “No Nancy.” “Well your face is a very pretty red right now. See you later.” With that she slid out the door leaving me shaking as the elevator operator smiled. For some reason the remainder of the day I had butterflies flittering around my tummy. Later that night as I climbed into my bed they were still there. The last I as I drifted into dreamland was that charming smile and the scent of musk cologne.

Chapter Five

Several months later a notice was out that Hibbard’s was hosting a Christmas dinner. There would be turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, and cranberries followed by a surprise dessert. Spouses were included. We needed to sign up soon. Our lunch break was filled with excited chatter as to who was all going to go. Which spouses would be attending and so on. Nancy promptly took the opportunity to ask me if I would be attending. Before I could answer Louis stated that of course I would. Why wouldn’t I? “The rest of us will be there and so you should be there as well Anna. If it is all right with the rest of you I will reserve a table for our group since we need a big table. Is that all right with everyone?” Suddenly the excitement grew with Nancy not taking her eyes off me. “I will pick you up Anna, that is if you have no other ride.” “Thank you Nancy. I would love to ride with you. But since the bus gets me to and from work it would likely get me here for dinner. And no Nancy, I am not afraid of the boogeyman like someone I know,” I said laughing while I watched her face turn pinker and pinker. With that Nancy and I began to laugh as her face turned into red. When the tears subsided someone said, “Alright you two. Tell us. No one leaves until our little group without knowing the story.” Of course they all chimed in that that was our group tale. We share our troubles and our fun. It goes no further than this table they insisted. “Alright, but Anna if you get a hot date you must share details with me.” “Oh Nancy! You know I don’t have time for that!” On my way home from work I sat in my usual seat feeling the same motion of the bus as it roared and jerked its way from the downtown area taking riders nearer their homes. My mind was now on the Christmas dinner. Oh how I would love to attend, but what shall I wear? I have never been to a fancy dinner before. It is free to all staff with a $3.00 charge for their guests. Well I have no guest so I needn’t worry about that. Should I spend the $3.00 to purchase some material from the discount floor and make myself a new dress?

By the time I crawled into bed my mind was wondering what colour material should I buy. What colour do they have? May it not be green or yellow. Those colours do not look well on me. In the morning I will take my dress pattern out to see how much material I would need to purchase. I may not have enough money for any so there is no need to worry until lunchtime. As I hurrying to the lunchroom for my morning coffee break who should grab my arm but my friend Nancy. Before I even said good morning her words were falling out. “So what will you wear and don’t tell me your are not going because you have nothing to wear.” I had to laugh. She keeps me on the happy side. After confessing I was going to quickly eat my lunch and then go to the This & That department for material I heard, “Great! I will go with you and don’t worry, I will not tell a soul.” “Sure Nancy you won’t tell, but everyone can read your mind. It is so full of mischief. I would love to have your company anyway.” I am not sure if it was because of my nervousness or if it was Nancy bubbling over that was giving it away. As we stood to leave Louis said, “You two have fun shopping and do buy the store out.” Riding home that late afternoon I felt giddy myself. I had purchased some pretty blue fabric with silver sparkles that just happened to be on a two hour special. I had not even been aware that Hibbard’s had such specials. Clearly Nancy wasn’t either. We were so excited I could barely think. As I ired the blue fabric an older clerk approached us. She forgot to tell me there were two bolts they were clearing away as they had never sold. One was the blue with the silver sparkly threads. The other was a pink. Immediately I knew the blue one was for me. Walking to the elevator Nancy said, “Today has to be your lucky day. I have never heard of selling dress fabrics for next to nothing. Don’t say anything as it may have been a mistake.” I quickly finished my dinner that night cleaning up with lightning speed. All the way home I looked over my shoulder expecting to hear someone threatening to turn me in.

By the time I finished cutting the last piece my eyes were tiring. My heart had pumped so many extra beats since lunchtime, it was no wonder I was feeling tired. A few weeks later Nancy and I walked into the ballroom that was fit for a queen and her escort. Streamers with sparkles were blowing in the gentle air. There were white sparkly stars hanging everywhere. Next to the dance floor was the largest indoor Christmas tree I have ever seen. It was covered in so many lights with silver icicles it shimmered in a beautiful glow. Each table was decorated with the finest china in a Holly pattern with poinsettia flowers on white linen table clothes. Candles were everywhere with mistletoe hanging from the doorways. At the sound of music following this delicious dinner my hand fell into that of the most handsome man with the familiar smile. We danced the night away as I was swung this way and then the other. We were the center of attention as we danced in the middle of the floor doing dips and turns. My dress was the most ired. Suddenly I was not able to catch my breath as I fought the blanket off. I was in my bed! Did this really happen? I curled back under my blanket and closed my eyes hoping prince charming would come back. Alas. He was nowhere to be found. I made no mention of my beautiful dream to Nancy. I had a feeling she just may not be able to keep this to herself. Actually it was a little embarrassing. This was for teenagers and not older women. Each time I held my dress up I was iring it more and more. Finally I just had to try it on. It was lovely. If only Bud was here to escort me. We made a lovely couple on a dance floor. Well, so we were told. The few times we were at a dance we participated in the conservative numbers like waltzing and a two step as we looked into each others eyes. We did love each other. There was no one I would rather dance with than my beloved Bud. We had started to practice the polka in our little suite whenever we found some good music on the radio. We told no one. Bud said he wanted for us to be comfortable doing the old time waltzes for when

Tito and Luella got married. He wanted them to be as proud of us as we were of them. Secretly I know he really wanted us to look good on that dance floor. He was not fooling me. Finally the big Christmas party was here. The anticipation had been building to the breaking point. We were all as excited as a group of teenagers. With a delicious turkey dinner being served how we could not all be waiting in anticipation. And I had a new dress to wear. This is my first new dress. I had always made sure Luella had something nice to wear that I never concerned myself with what I would wear, and Bud never mentioned it. Luella said this year it was my turn. When Nancy came to pick me up she said I definitely looked like Cinderella. By the surprised look on her face I knew she sincerely meant it as a compliment. I was so excited. As we walked into the dining room that had been turned into a ballroom she asked, “Where is Louis? Can you see him?” “No! How do you know which is our table?” “Louis told me. He said there is to be a bouquet of flowers in the middle. One flower is for each of the ladies at our table. Isn’t that sweet?” The flowers took my breath away. There were enough roses for at least one for each of us in every colour we might like to choose just like he said. The scent was wonderful. A pretty narrow red ribbon was tied around each with a sprig of white baby’s breath. Within minutes our table was full. Our little group was together full of chatter as we shared our thoughts of the evening to come. Louis was nearly the last one to come, but come he did looking more like a prince than a fellow worker. After a short welcome address by our boss Mr. Moore, his wife said a short prayer. Our dinners on white plates were now being served to us by young ladies in black dresses covered with white aprons. Service was efficient and elegant. The surprise dessert was a fancy chocolate sleigh filled with two miniature white balls of ice cream. Too pretty to eat, but we did after a few oohs and aahs.

Before opening the dance floor for the evening Mr. Moore thanked everyone for being such a wonderful part of his team. A team that he said he was very proud of. Much to both my surprise and embarrassment I was asked to dance by several men from other departments that I had come to know a little. Nancy was soon kicking up her heels too. It was very quickly apparent that I was much more reserved than Nancy. She was getting right into it with a few of the sprightlier men. They were having a great time. Even those that were not dancing enjoyed watching them as they too spun around the floor. Before I realized it Louis was beside me with his hand resting on my lower back. “Anna, please do me the honour of dancing with me. For the remainder of the evening I mean. There is no one here that I would rather dance with. Please?” As I looked up into those sparkling eyes I felt my cheeks getting warmer and warmer. I think I said yes or something like it. Before I knew it I was in his arms as we circled the dance floor. I felt like I was the belle of the ball. Number after number we danced, twirling first this way and then that. I found myself relaxing more and more. I couldn’t stop smiling into his eyes. As the music turned to a Boogie Woogie Mr. and Mrs. Moore went by. With a wink at me, Mr. Moore said, “Now don’t let that brother of mine dance you right off your feet Anna.” With a chuckle they moved on as I looked in shock at Louis. I thought that number would never end. It was like there was someone else in my body moving my feet first this way and then that. When it did end Louis held me closer as we moved to the rhythm of a slower waltz. Ever so softly and gently he whispered in my ear, “Anna did you not know I was his brother?” “No I didn’t. I thought you just worked here. Why me?” “Because you have the personality that I like. You are smiley but not loud. You are friendly to everyone and most of all you are beautiful in blue.” “Oh Louis. I am just a poor widow with two children.”

“I had heard that you had a son and a daughter. I also heard that you were a widow. Tell me about your children. What do they do?” “Tito is the older one. He is finishing his high school years working part time in a body shop. He tells me he moves cars around on the lot as well as cleaning them up in preparation for the body man to repair. Tito often tells me about what he has done that day to help with the cars. He is learning so much. I have a feeling that one day he will be a body man, but first he must finish high school. His dad and I did not do without for them to slacken off. We want better for our children. “As for Luella she is in high school as well. Her grades are very good, but then she loves school. Anything with a book is her thing. She says one day she would like to write a book. I hope she does. “Yesterday she came home with great news for me. It was great news too. Without so much as a hint she applied to the bakery close to our place. She said they were hiring. With her I can melt your heart smile she told me how she got the job. I am so proud of her. She never even hinted that she was up to this or asked me for any advice. They don’t seem to want that from Mom anymore. For now she says she is just helping out everywhere but dreams of one day being their cake decorator. She said she knows her daddy will be proud of her even if he is not right here. I said these things because I wanted Louis to know that while their dad is not here any longer he is still very much a part of our hearts. He will forever be their dad that they both loved and miss so much.” “You know Anna, you can be very proud of them both. So many young people are just hanging around not doing anything. With encouragement and they will move forward. I would say their momma is doing a fine job.” “Thank you Louis. That is very kind of you. They both like to visit their dad by themselves. Perhaps this is nice for me as well as it is for them. “For whatever reason Luella takes him a handful of bright yellow dandelions in a plastic cup weighted down with a few rocks. I asked Tito one day if he knew the story, but of course he just smiled and shrugged which means he is not telling me. “Tito takes two white daisies that he places in the vase provided. I am afraid to ask just where he gets them.”

“I am sure he didn’t steal them, but you could casually ask one day when you are not speaking about visiting his dad why he chooses daises. You just may get a hint of a clue, but be quick. They turn into clams in a hurry.” “Gee Louis you sound like you have some experience with teenagers.” “I do. I have a twenty-three-year-old son. His mother ed away when he was two. I did some years of volunteering at the local high school for single parents. Now that is where you learn,” he laughed. Before we knew it they were calling for the last dance. Where has the evening gone? I am still feeling like Cinderella.

Monday came much too soon. Now I will need to face the looks as well as the I know all about it smiles. I tried to act as though nothing had happened. But then there was Nancy. She was bursting at the seams. As promised she never said a word about anything. She didn’t have to. Her quiet giggle and huge smile said it all. She couldn’t wait for the cat to jump out of the bag, but she did promise. From then on Louis and I were a couple together but apart. Soon he was openly placing his arm around my shoulders every chance he had. I love the feeling once again. I felt so comfortable and protected near Louis. I had always thought that Bud would be my one and only love so I must be careful to guard my heart.

Spring has sprung. Wanda told me it was time for their ladies spring tea at the Rascal Rally Diner in two weeks. I am sure every lady for miles around will be there. You need to sign up for your preferred seating time. They had two times to choose from in order to accommodate everyone. Mugs were left in the cupboards as they were replaced with teacups that each lady brought with her, and took home again for next year. It was a time to show off your fanciest cup and saucer. Unusual stories of special ones were shared with the cheerful group. Sunday best dresses were worn. This year I am hoping Luella will me. She does have one cup and saucer that was given to her a few years ago from her Auntie Hannah. Luella still calls it her Hannah cup. There will be two choices for seating that day. Small dainty sweet pancakes or dainty sandwiches served with a slice of dill pickle. Desert will be a generous slice of either chocolate cake or white cake with a pink icing. I cannot how much it was last year but I do the cake was free, generous slices and delicious. I promised myself that this was a function I would always, if at all possible, attend. Such a fun time to meet the ladies, and Nancy will be there too. It is held on a Wednesday as stores are closed that day.

The day of the tea began the same as any other Wednesday. Just like last year it was a beautiful warm spring day. The sun was shining. The birds were now gathered in the branches chirping to each other. An ever so light breeze was floating through the air. A perfect day for ladies to show off their best dresses and hats with matching gloves. It would be an afternoon to well into the fall. One evening Tito asked me if after supper I would have time to chat with him. Of course I would. “So son. What is up? What would you like to talk about?” “Well. There is a course on body shop being offered in the evening, but we must have an adult with us. I love you Mom, but you really don’t know much about cars so I wondered if you would be hurt if I asked Mr. Moore if he would like to come with me. There is no charge. I just don’t want either you or Dad to be hurt.” “You are right about that. I don’t know anything about cars. Guess I didn’t have you fooled,” I said with a laugh. “No Mom you really didn’t. Moms don’t need to know stuff like that so it is alright.” “Anyway, I am sure Mr. Moore would love to go with you,” I said. “If he is busy he will say so. He is going to stop here for a wee while this evening so if you wish you can ask him then.” I am not sure which of us was more nervous, but as soon as Louis walked through the door Tito said in one breath, “Mr. Moore. I would like to ask you something and you do not need to say yes but if you do that would be really great I understand that you may be busy.” Wearing the biggest grin I have ever seen on Louis he said, “So when and what is it?” “Next week on Monday evening at seven o’clock at the shop room in the high school.”

With that Louis took a small calendar from his pocket. Quickly glancing through it he said, “I do not have anything happening that evening. So I shall be here for you at six thirty. How does that sound?” “Great and thanks. Moms don’t know anything about cars.” Louis just smiled. Monday evening I didn’t rush home from work. For some unknown reason there were ladies that were also slower than usual checking out at the time clock so we all walked out of the store together where we gathered again for another short chat. I noticed a small group of ladies standing not far away that seemed to be keeping an eye on us. I wondered just what they were so inquisitive about but never said anything to the others. Our group just began to break apart when I heard my name being called as though someone was asking me if that was really me. I looked over but didn’t think there was anyone familiar to me. Again I was sure I heard Anna? A lady with short dark hair wearing glasses began to walk towards me. “Anna? Is that you?” The voice sounded familiar but I couldn’t place her. Her voice was that of a young girl as opposed to a lady. I still couldn’t think whom it was so I asked, “Do I know you?” “Yes, if your husband is Bud. We met as we arrived in Colorado as we both waited for family to pick us up.” “Of course! You are Lily but I can’t your husband’s name.” “Arnold Baker. We had a lovely chat. We hoped that we would meet with you again one day and here it is. In Canada no less! The land of opportunity.” “Yes it is!” I replied. “We just have to make it happen. We were always told that it is the land of milk and honey, but Gus said no. It is the land of opportunity. I think he is right.”

By now another lady had wandered over to us. She was introduced to me as her cousin Linda. “Her husband is Earl Finn. We are visiting them for a few more days. How is Bud?” Lily asked pretty much in one breath. I was left with nothing more to say other than Bud has been taken from us. After receiving her sincere words of sympathy Linda asked me to visit them for dinner on Wednesday evening so Lily and I can catch up. As Tito and Luella are now old enough to be on their own I thanked her very much. After being told there was nothing to bring but myself I got directions and bid them goodnight. They both seemed very nice. Just the way I Lily being. Since Luella has being seeing Frank very regularly she doesn’t seem to have much time at home. They have a group of friends they get together with a lot. I do keep reminding her that there are more fish in the cold blue sea. She just gives me that smile and “I know Mom. You were young when you fell in love with Daddy.” What can I say? Bud was different. He was genuine, and sincere. I do like Frank too. He is so very polite and respectful. Tito says he is a nice guy so I know when I am outnumbered. As I wandered home on Wednesday evening my mind filled with happy thoughts of my evening. They are such nice people. Bud and Earl certainly would have hit it off. They made me feel so welcome. Their children have already left home, but still we seemed to have so much in common. She will be easy to visit with. She carries no baggage. I had not expected how well Tito and Louis would be getting on. Tito never stops smiling. He has been a much happier young man. Luella was happier too. They both kept saying such nice things about Louis. How he made our life seem like their friends life etc. Without a word to me one evening when Frank had hung around a little while picking Luella up, their conversation went to Louis. Tito was telling Frank something funny that happened at the body shop that of course included Louis. It was Mr. Moore this and Mr. Moore that. Finally out of the corner of my eye I noticed Frank nod his head ever so slightly. “You know Mom,” Tito said. “We would like to call Mr. Moore Bubba.” “What? Why is that? What kind of a name is that?”

As Frank smiled at me he said, “My father died many years ago too. My mom has a gentleman friend. I started calling him Bubba. It means special friend. Somehow I still call him Bubba. He likes it and so do I. I have no desire to call him Dad and neither do Tito and Luella have such thoughts. Bubba says he feels both respected and loved. “In America they use Bubba as a term of endearment for brother or someone special. Sometimes for Uncle.” “It is fine with me then, but it must also be fine with Mr. Moore. So when are you going to talk to him about this?” I asked. “Well Mom, so that is where you come in. Luella and I thought you might talk to him for us. Would you Mom? Please?” “No, I don’t think that is a good idea. He may get the wrong idea. We are just friends. Perhaps Frank could be there too. He could explain where this unusual name came from and why and how it works in his family.” As they sat there looking at Frank my heart was getting heavier and heavier by the second. I cannot imagine how difficult this must be for them but I feel it would be more heartfelt if I was not in on this. “Mom, when will you ask him over again?” asked Luella. “Which evening works for you three and I will ask him. Alright?” Two evenings later Louis came to visit. I had prepared him for Tito and Luella wishing to talk to him about an important matter. He just smiled as he took my hand. “I am always open for your children as I am for you.” While I was in the kitchen doing the supper dishes, banging the pots so as to not seem as though I am listening my heart was pounding. Where will this take us from here? Is this something I wish to have in our relationship? I could not hear any words being spoken but guessed there was. Luella should be on a roll by now. I trust Frank will keep things in order as their family has gone through this. After a while I sat at the table reading the newspaper and still I couldn’t hear them talking. Now I began to worry. Did they upset Louis?

Finally I heard the door open followed with “Night Bubba! Night Bubba!” and then the door closed. Now what do I do, I wondered. I couldn’t breathe. I was scared of what lay ahead. Then Louis was beside me with his arms wrapped tightly around me. We stood there, neither of us saying anything for the longest time. “Anna. I have just been made almost the happiest man on earth. I now look forward to the day when you will feel you can say you are ready to give me your heart. That will never mean that Bud will be forgotten just as Lilith won’t be.” The sound of her unusual name always made me respond with a slight giggle. Never would I let on it was because of her name. As a young girl there was a girl at school called Lilith which was said to mean night monster, and so she was teased by the boys. I vowed at that time that if I should have children I will be sure their names do not have a meaning that others can tease them about. Life is hard enough.

While I was doing dishes tonight I thought about Linda and Earl and how Lily innocently asked about Bud. While I don’t think I need to include all the finer details it probably is time to give serious thought to sharing a few details when I am asked about my husband. It is time I no longer keep him locked away. Bud always said he enjoyed working at the grain elevator, but had no desire to work inside a silo. The dangers were enormous. Curtis Powell, his boss, assured Bud that would not be necessary. At the moment he was needed outside. They needed a man that knew and understood horses. Bud cared for them as though they were his own. The majority of farmers were bringing their grain in by horse and wagon. At times there was so many teams lined up that some would get antsy. Some do not like any other horses near while others stood silently as though they were half asleep with their head hanging patiently as they waited. At times it would be necessary for the farmers to leave their team untethered for a short time. Farmers are not encouraged to bring their dogs with them. Dogs are accustomed to running loose around the farms barking and chasing anything that moved. Some horses do not like strange dogs near their feet and will retaliate with a kick or two. While these situations are not a frequent occurrence, any at all can spell serious trouble. Bud was the outside foreman keeping things running smoothly. He also did the clean up around the silos. He cleaned and disposed of the mess left behind by the horses. At times farmers had to be convinced they could wait their turn in another spot other than the one they usually use. They would not lose their turn. He kept the water trough filled so the horses could have a drink before heading for home. Some still had a long trip at the end of their already hard day. A silo is a structure used on a farm to store grain. Silos are generally used for bulk storage. Gas can be formed through the natural fermentation process. This odorless and colourless gas can be very dangerous as it replaces the silos oxygen giving a person little warning that they are about to be overcome. Safety officials now say that one foot of grain covering an individual produces about 300 pounds of pressure. These gases can also result in a worker ing out and falling into the grain to become engulfed resulting in death by suffocation. Standing on moving grain is deadly. The grain can act like quicksand and bury a worker in

seconds. The day that Bud suffered his terrible accident is one I shall never forget. It was a Wednesday. This is my day to be at home. I had given thought to going browsing in the city but decided against it. Tito and Luella were both at school. I had been extra busy that morning that before I knew it lunch time had come and gone. I thought if I don’t sit down soon it will not be happening. First I rooted through one cupboard and then the next finally settling on opening a can of sardines. It would make a healthy quick lunch. If I wanted to have the laundry finished in time to make supper I knew I had to hurry and get at it. Danger is a part of agricultural life, but rarely discussed. Working the land and all things related may be one of the oldest professions. Long hours and close with machinery and horses represent much of the injuries and fatalities. This day Bud was calming a team down as they impatiently waited in the hot air for their time to go home to their stall in their familiar barn to rest. In his quiet way he spoke to the more agitated one of the team rubbing his nose to sooth him. It appeared that he was getting things under control when something startled them. Tobias was working nearby when he sensed there was a problem. Tethering the team he was tending to as quickly as possible he rushed over to lend a hand. Before he was within reach the one horse reared up with a toss of his head sending Bud flying through the air to land in the dirt against the silo. By the time Tobias was with Bud someone else had left their team to help. There was little room for safety as the team frantically fought back to get their freedom. Men were running from everywhere to help. I don’t know how long it took them to move Bud to safety. Someone had gone for the doctor. No one seemed to have the finer details for me. I wanted to know each detail. Did he call for help? Did he ask for me? Did he suffer? Did he away with someone beside him? I needed to know it all. I wanted to see my husband. He had now been moved to the hospital. Gus had been notified. When I entered the still dim room it was like the most eerie feeling I have ever had. It was both strange and frightening. At first I thought he looked as though

he was sleeping until I saw the other side of his face. Where had it gone? From his cheek bone down to his chin was a crushed tangled mess covered in blood. His hair, neck and shoulder were covered in his now drying dark red blood. I found myself screaming. “That is not my husband! Where is my husband?” I was in another place with a stranger. When Gus arrived I was in hysterics. My body was shaking. My legs were weak. I was trying to get close enough to hold him, but nurses were holding me back. When Gus took me home my children were home from school wondering where I had gone. After taking me to my bed, giving me a sedative he returned to the kitchen where Tito and Luella were standing with tears streaming down their faces. They didn’t know what had happened. They just knew that something terrible had happened to their daddy. The daddy they both loved so much. No matter how many days have ed it is never enough to erase that terrible scene from my mind. I shall forever see him lying there in a pool of blood with half his face missing. For the next couple years I slept lying on my pillow covered with his shirt. I had no idea how I would manage. I was in a new world. A world that I was still getting acquainted with. I had so much to learn with no one to lean on. Time moves on and so we must too. At first I visited Bud at his new and final resting place each day. Tito and Luella were reluctant to come with me for a while, but soon they told me they had gone by themselves. Instead of saying how surprised I was I calmly said how proud I was of them. If they needed anything they just had to ask. They never asked. At first I just thought that as time went on I would be open to share his accident with others. It was such a long time coming before I felt I could. Then no one asked so I never brought it up. When asked I just said that he has left us leaving them feeling as though they shouldn’t ask. Tito and Luella disappear whenever it is brought up so I never pushed them either. I have decided that the next time I have coffee with Wanda or with Linda I will bring the subject up. As friends I am sure they will be sensitive so no need to worry until the time comes.

Chapter Six

Wanda and I had had a quick cup of coffee together on afternoons following our grocery shopping time. Time was short, but we managed a little time. Enough time for me to draw some of the worry from Wanda. We agreed that after the tea we would get together for a longer chat. She has had so much happen with Curtis I am not sure how she manages to sleep at night and then come to work smiling. She did tell me one day that her work time was her time away from her problems. For me it is church so I understand. She told me Curtis has been allowed to communicate with her via letters. With them being censored he cannot get too nasty. Wanda says these letters are from the phony Curtis not the one she lived with. Each letter has been filled with comments of how she has provoked him into his jealous rage. How much he loves her and their boys. He has never meant to hurt her, but she provokes him. He is sure there has been a man in her life. Just the thought turns my stomach upside down. I will never trust again she told me. My bones are healed but my heart and mind are still mending she has told me. My sons do not wish to be anywhere that he is now or ever she added. His last letter told her how he wishes to have visiting time with her at the prison. “Oh Anna. I cannot do it. I have begged Father Noah to intervene. He is not sincere, but he can be so sweet and convincing that others believe him. They think I am the one that is making up everything I think he says. I know I am not. How can I prove it? I wish I swore so I could call him a jackass. Both John and Charles said they would never again call him their dad. They have both disowned him. While I think that is sad I am relieved and proud of them for making such a mature choice. “After listening to them telling me bits and pieces I am amazed just how much they had heard and seen. They too have been carrying a heavy load all this time. Mr. Hayes, a very kindly gentleman from church has been counselling them. I didn’t know this but am relieved to hear they are speaking with someone that they trust. Just how they came to meet him I am not sure. I feel better knowing that Bud and Mr. Hayes had a lot of respect for each other. To John and Charles he is old, but to us he is middle aged. Mr. Hayes was just old enough to be their father.” Wanda said she had been trying to think of a way to ask them if they would like

to visit with Curtis, but after telling her about this she no longer has this huge concern. I suggested that she keep this in mind for now. They just might change their ideas from time to time without any pressure from her. “You know Anna. It is only six more months until Curtis can request visiting time with us providing there is an escort with him. Apparently I don’t even have the right to refuse. He will take me to court if I do. I am sure I will lose. Husbands have more rights than we do.” “You are right there Wanda. I expect that you do have a witness to confirm his behaviour with you. Or do you already?” “No I don’t think I do. John and Charles should not be dragged over this time and time again. Sometimes I feel they are not children any more. Do you think I would be asking too much to ask them to speak up in court for me?” “Well I am not in your shoes, but as a mother and since they have openly disowned him I would think you could maybe sit and talk it over with them. One thing that would concern me is if your sons should have children will Curtis then insist on seeing his grandchildren?” “I know they both spoke of things they heard and saw, but I am not sure if the judge will accept that because of their ages at the time.” After us parting I reminded myself that I had not mentioned anything about Bud’s last days. I felt her troubles were much more heart breaking than mine. There will always be time to share other things on our minds. For now Wanda has her head and heart to overflowing and not with love.

This Sunday Louis and I are going to visit his son. He lives about two hours away with a friend in a basement suite. They each have day jobs but both do night schooling as well. Vance is like his father. He loves ing and plans to be a certified general ant. In a big office of course. Louis says his marks are always above 90% making Louis a very proud father. Sunday is expected to be sun mixed with light clouds. This should be a perfect day for a drive. Because their suite is small Louis has arranged that we meet Vance in a restaurant. A good meal is always a sure way to bring out the eagerness. Louis says Vance is not one to say too much so not to feel offended. It will have nothing to do with me. The day is perfect. We left right after church. With there being light clouds it prevented the sun from being too bright for the drivers. It was mild enough that we just had the back windows rolled down a little to keep the temperature comfortable. The restaurant was a little more upscale than the Rascal Rally Diner. By the number of guests already seated it must be a popular restaurant with exceptional food. Each table boasted a white tablecloth with a small vase of daisies in the. The neatly folded serviettes were a pretty burgundy. There were couples my age and older. Some appeared to have come from church as well. The ladies wore nice sweater sets, which I thought must have been a little cold for them. Their hair was nicely curled as though they had been pin curled. Today I did not envy them. My dress was not my main focus. It is Louis and Vance. I am in happy and contented heaven. Vance had his father’s manners, a gentleman at all times. He was warm and welcoming putting me at ease. Like Louis he is easy to like. In the car we talked about the menu. Louis thought I might be more comfortable when we get there. He was right. I would never have known just what would be the right thing to order. We settled on roast beef with mashed potatoes. Yorkshire pudding with vegetables of the day was included. How will I ever eat it all kept crossing my mind? Vance kept mentioning the great lemon pie they serve. The meringue is so high and on it went.

We spent two hours in a very enjoyable conversation discussing everything from bookkeeping to sports to Hibbard’s. I was always included. Vance was as considerate of including me as Louis always is. Much to my surprise when we stood to leave Vance opened his arms to me extending a warm and friendly hug. The same awaited Louis. Louis was beaming with pride. I couldn’t blame him in the least. On the way home Louis brought up the subject of Wanda. I had shared very little of it with him. He never pushed me for more information. I know I would have shared a little with Bud too so felt comfortable doing this. Right off the start he said he would never say anything. Just wants to give me a shoulder to lean on so I won’t be carrying too large a burden for my friend. Louis said he would only give me advice when I ask for it. Now there’s a good man for you! I must say that Bud never did either, but I could always tell when he was wishing he could contribute something to my thoughts. Tonight I shall dream not only of Cinderella, but of this wonderful day. Life is so good. Thank you Louis. Never had I thought my life would move in this direction. I began to share a little of my mother Ruby with him here and there, but I was still surprised when he brought the subject up today as we traveled home. He began by saying that Lilith often spoke of her mother. She always regretted that they were not close. Her mother was a controller. She felt she had the right to tell Lilith constantly what she can or cannot do. “Consequently after we were married less time was spent with her if for no other reason than to keep the peace,” he told me. Perhaps it was the peaceful view as we traveled along the country roads that gave me the feeling I could share with Louis. What harm can it do, I thought. This is something else that I have never mentioned to anyone not that there was any particular reason. I think it was just that I thought no one really cares.

I Momma Ruby as being strong, but quiet and gentle. She was a very hard worker. As I think back she did so much for one person. She helped her husband in the barn and sometimes in the field. She cooked, baked and cleaned for the family. She planted and cared for a large garden each year. She canned enough for our family for the winter using a large pot on our wood stove partially filled with water. The sealers that she had washed and rinsed in very hot water before filling them were placed in the water bath for the longest time. Somehow she always knew when it was time to remove them. She helped with the butchering and then canning the chickens, the homemade sausages. She made our soap. There was no end to what she could do. But one day it became obvious that Momma Ruby was feeling very poorly. Without a word she went to bed where the remainder of her days were spent. We never knew why. She was just sick. It was some time later before I was told that she had breast cancer. This was something that was not talked about. The neighbours and friends all fondly called her Momma Ruby and so now I refer to her in the same way. Cancer in the 1960s was a very traumatic experience for both the patient and the family. Doctors did not wish to tell the patient they had cancer. The husband was always told as his wife was his property, type of thing. During that time treatment mainly required radical surgery removing all the tissue of the breast as well as the surrounding area. Surgery went from the collarbone down most of the length of the chest. With the fatty tissue removed the patient was left with a clear deformity. Padded bras were then used to give the patient the appearance of normalcy. Patients were then followed up with radiotherapy. The world was on the cutting edge of radiotherapy in the field of Oncology. There was only a 60% survival rate for cancer patients over a period of five years. Remissions were first reported in the 1960s. The hospice movement was formed to allow cancer patients to die with comfort and dignity while receiving proper pain relief. This was something that was sorely lacking. Louis listened with sincere interest as I spoke of my mother and my love and iration for her. My only regret is that I never actually appreciated just how much she did for her family or contributed to our changing society. I am so proud of her. It still hurts to think of how much she had to suffer due to this terrible disease that is affecting so many people.

It was at least a month before I decided that no matter how many things I had to do I would visit Wanda before she started her Wednesday shift. I spent the morning hurrying through my chores. As I stepped out for my walk to the Diner I was overcome with the natural beauty there was to enjoy. The sun was brightly shining on the pale green leaves of the trees lining the neighbourhood streets. Dark green shadows were cast on the rich grass. The packed dirt road glistened from the sparkling rocks forming its pathway. The blue sky was home to a few soft white clouds floating around. The branches were almost perfectly still. The birds chirped to each other from their perches on the slimmest branches that were barely swaying. As I entered the Diner I was prepared to greet the staff in my usual friendly way. Stopping me in my tracks was a strange face. One I had never seen before. There was no Wanda. This lady offered to seat me at a table. I requested one near the side edge of the diner. “Where is Wanda?” I asked. “I don’t know. There is no Wanda here today,” the unfriendly lady replied. “Could I please speak with either the dishwasher or the owner? It is important.” With a huff she turned on her heels and headed to the kitchen. It was a couple minutes before Mr. Cook came out to talk to me. “I am so happy to see you Anna. Wanda has not shown up for work for a week now. No one seems to know anything about her. I don’t know where she lives. Do you?” “Well, I did visit her there once. I think I could still find it but I would need to walk there from my place.” “Oh Anna! If you could do that for me I would so appreciate it. She is a very nice and efficient waitress. Has she said anything to you about her husband?” “Well, I do know a little. I am not sure I should share with anyone as she told me in confidence.” “I understand. I only know because one time he came here looking for her. He

was very angry because she wasn’t here. I had to call the police in order to have him leave. I worry so much for her.” I quickly walked home so I could do this errand today. I it not being far from my place. At first when I knocked on the front door I could not hear any sounds of life inside. The third time I banged really loud to which a strong male voice yelled, “Hold your horses. I am coming.” An old man in scruffy clothes opened the door. “What do you want and who are you?” he demanded. “I am wishing to speak with Wanda Allan for a minute. We are friends. Is she home?” “Nope! She hasn’t been here for a week now. She has left no message for me either. Her rent is paid up for another two weeks. If she doesn’t return with more rent for me I will be throwing her stuff out on the street. If you see that no good husband of hers you can tell him he is not welcome here. Should he step foot on my property I will be calling the police. You look like a nice young lady. You should be as far away from this as possible. That crazy lunatic is dangerous.” As the door was about to be slammed in my face I yelled, “Please do you know where her sons live so I can talk to them?” “She ain’t got no sons.” Slam! What? How can that be? I must find Father Noah. That is not my church, but I am sure he will be helpful. At least friendly. Seems like everyone is grumpy today. I was correct in that he was more friendly than anyone else today. After showing me into his tiny office and asking me why I was there he settled back in his large chair with a high back. I have heard he sometimes naps there. As quickly and briefly as Father could he began to speak in a soft slow voice that made me feel as though I was now with someone that would be helpful. “First of all Anna. Wanda has spoken, just in ing of you. Yes, she does have

two sons that no longer live at home. I suspect she was just trying to protect them by not parting with information. What seems to be the problem that has you so anxious?” I filled in any parts that I thought Father might not already know. He had no idea where she is or if Curtis is still in jail. Before parting I was assured he would get right on it and keep me informed. “Yes, do stay away from Curtis,” he warned. “He is one mean dude,” Father added. Before I had walked too far from Wanda’s I tiptoed around the back to see if I could get a peek inside. Another shock. There were dirty dishes on the table with items clearly out of place as though some had been thrown. Curtis! I mentioned this to Father Noah in hopes he would see this as important enough to mention when he is at the police station. I have a strong feeling that Curtis has returned! The search was on and getting more intense as the days went by. I was feeling guilty for sharing information that she had told me under special confidence of it not being open to others. If this helps to assist my friend I am sure she will understand. When her two weeks rent was over I walked over to see if her items had been thrown out in the yard for everyone to see. How long before others will have taken the good things Wanda has scrimped to get. There was nothing there. Guess that means another visit with Father Noah, but first I shall peek into the kitchen window. Everything seems to be just as it was on my previous visit. What does this mean besides the fact the Wanda has not been here. The Wanda I know would never leave her home looking like this. Another week went by with still no word from Wanda. Then on my day off just as I was thinking of getting myself a little lunch my telephone rang. Whoever could that be? I wondered. Weeks will go by before someone telephones me. Louis generally sets up a time to just drop by so we have no need to speak on the telephone. “Hello,” I softly said. “Hello Anna. This is Wanda. Can I speak with you for a minute?”

“Of course you can. I have been worried sick over you.” “I am so sorry about that,” Wanda replied softly. “Yes. Mr. Cook told me. I am so sorry. Today will be a slow afternoon here so he suggested you walk over for a coffee. Coffee and pie is on the house for us. Please come about one thirty if that is alright with you.” Forty-five minutes later I was walking home with my head spinning. Mr. Cook ed us for most of the conversation. While his comments were few and far between he continuously shook his head as he occasionally lightly pounded the table with his fist. His face was red so I knew his temper had been up and I was sure it was not with Wanda. Apparently Curtis had decided to visit Wanda one evening. He had been granted a couple days out with a chaperone to visit her. Before he got to Wanda’s home he had slipped from the escorts view disappearing into the back alley that only he knew. Like many prisoners he must have had someone on the outside locating Wanda’s home for his surprise visit. While they were busy locating Curtis he knocked on her door. Not expecting him Wanda began to open it. It was just open far enough for him to put his foot inside and grab a hold of her wrist twisting her arm behind her back. The landlord was not home. She was alone but she screamed for all she was worth with no one to hear her. Slamming the door shut his anger grew into a rage. No one, least of all Wanda could get away with doing that. He pulled her hair drawing her head back so far she thought her neck would break. Then he kicked her in the back of her legs as he continued his verbal foul abuse. When she became too weak to struggle, he dragged her out the back door and into an alley. An old dirty car was waiting for them. The driver got out leaving the keys with Curtis who repeatedly said he just wanted to talk to her. After hour upon hour Curtis lashed out at her both verbally and physically. He accused her of being unfaithful, lazy, cooking meals that were not fit for the pigs, not looking after his boys the way she should have, she was too lenient with them, he could have taught them something with his belt but she always stepped in between.

She has the bruises on her throat from his thumb and fingers from where he tried to cut the air off. He did not wish her to die he assured her. He still had plans for her. She said she was too bewildered to even think of what his plans could be.

When the morning light began to peek through the dark sky he tied her to his belt with a rope from the glove compartment just in case she planned to leave his little party, he kept telling her. With no lights on Curtis drove until they entered an old abandoned farm. He backed the car inside where it was apparent the family wagon had sat. She couldn’t even detect the sound of mice scurrying around. They were alone. After she begged him to let her use the bathroom he agreed. He dragged her across the car seat and outside of the barn where he watched her telling her how he always wanted to see a woman relieving herself. He had thought it would be a turn on for him, this very sick man. A couple days later she had decided to try a way to get his confidence in her. She became meek and mild saying that she is coming to understand what has made him so upset. Repeatedly, she said how sorry she was. She had not been aware of her actions. It was her turn to play into his hand. She would mess with his head. Each time he slept she carefully began to loosen the knot on the rope at her end. Finally the thought of the bottle under his seat became too much for him. He could no longer resist the temptation. Her head began to fill of payback ideas. She began to tell Curtis just how much she enjoyed it when he became very drunk as he danced around the living room naked. Wanda knew this was for her benefit. Instead she had found it disgusting. This time she would lead him on and on until he could barely stand as she encouraged him to sing love songs to her as loudly as he could. This was her opportunity. As luck would have it there was a farmer traveling the road to town. With the light of day not having fully visited she jumped on the back laying as still as she was able until they were in town where she slid off the back landing in the dirt with not a sound. With Curtis now back in his private room at the nearby jail she returned to her home. She said she spent the first day righting her apartment before going to speak to Mr. Cook to beg for her job back. A small town has a way of letting your friends and neighbours know everything that has gone on in your life, both private and public. Wanda then told me how

she has had so much practice over the years of holding her head up high while others talked. She was always too filled with pain to worry about her shame.

Time quickly moved on. I can barely believe that two years has flown by leaving my mind full of the changes that have taken place in my family alone. While I still had concerns for Wanda I did know that I could not solve her problems. She needed help, but from someone that could give her better guidance than me. I tried to focus on Louis and my own family as much as possible in order to sleep at night. One of my most enjoyable evenings was when Louis visited for a couple hours. We just sat sharing our day with each other. While it did make me feel a little lonesome for these times with Bud, I was grateful to have a new friend that cared about my day. Louis and I been laughing about some funny times in our past life when I ed that I was going to tell him a story of my Momma Ruby. “I have a cute and humorous story to tell you about my Momma Ruby,” I began. “She loved to tell visitors about the time when she was six years old. Their family was visiting another family on their farm. The children had to play outside because there was no room in the house. They had no toys so they just chased each other around in a tag game. After a while her right side began to hurt. She stopped running for a couple minutes bringing her brother Charles over to ask her what was wrong. Soon they were playing again but it was not long before the pain returned only this time it was very severe. She couldn’t stand up. She was doubling over holding her side as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Her brother ran into the house to bring their mother out. After a few questions she was told to forget about it and play. She would be fine. A few minutes later she was screaming in pain. Again her brother ran to the house for help. Their mother checked her over and along with the advice of her friend they felt she should definitely be taken to town for medical attention. This time Charles was sent to the barn to summon the men for help. Within a few minutes they all agreed she needed to be taken to town right away. The men left running for the barn where they quickly hitched the team to their open wagon for the five-mile ride to town. They had no doctor in town just a man that was helping the druggist out. In the hospital he checked her over coming to the conclusion it could be her appendix. There was nothing he could do. She would need to be seen by a Doctor MacCauley from Nipawin.

He decided that the 30 mile drive in a wagon might be too much for her. He said if his suspicion was correct it could burst letting all the poison spread through her body. The best would be to place a call to Doctor MacCauly to see if he could find the man that had a two-seater plane to fly him to our hospital. In the meantime Mother was to stay in the hospital where nurses could care for her. She had never been apart from her brother so she began to fiercely cry for him to come. When they left to go to town my mother’s friend had to hold Charles down. He was screaming to go with his sister. Children were not allowed in the hospitals. The following day Doctor MacCauley arrived. After examining her he stated that it was indeed her appendix so he must operate immediately to save her life. Her parents agreed. A room was prepared. Her dad carried her in laying her on the table. Above her were some very bright lights. There was nothing else that she could see. Soon the doctor came in speaking to her dad. They needed to strap her down to the bed, from her shoulders to her ankles. She was terrified. She began to scream and scream. She wanted her brother. She wanted everyone else to leave. Just get my brother she kept screaming. Next in came a nurse with a rubber pad about eight inches square. It smelled terrible. It stung her nose and eyes. They told her they were going to put this over her nose. She screamed no over and over getting louder by the minute. She was so frightened. In order to not get the chloroform into her eyes they had put a cloth over her eyes and forehead. Now she couldn’t see. She was a six-year-old terrified child. The next day she woke in the morning in another room all by herself. Guess who she wanted. There was no one with her but she was assured her parents would be in later in the day. She needed to lie quietly. When breakfast was brought in Mother said she didn’t want to eat it. She had only either had cooked porridge or cold puffed wheat. This was not something she had ever seen. The stern nurse opened her mouth forcing her to have a few bites causing Mother to cry some more. No one had ever treated her like that. Later in the morning her Godmother came in to see her bringing with her the biggest cluster of large green grapes she had ever seen but never tasted. After she left the nurse said they would put them in the icebox until Mother was ready to

eat some. She never saw them again. She tried to lie still as asked with only her tears for comfort. The following day when her parents came to take her home her brother was with them. First thing he did was sit beside her on her bed slipping a piece of tree sap into her mouth and then another into his. This was their chewing gum. Soon the nurse came in. That was not allowed either. He had to move. They hid their chewing gum in the corner of their mouths. Finally she was examined by the druggists’ assistant and released. She will never forget how excited she was to hear her parents being told that she was not allowed to carry more than a half pail of water at a time until she felt better. Somehow she never felt strong enough to carry more. If her brother could carry 4 sticks of wood in from the woodpile she was allowed to carry two. She never offered to carry more. About twenty-five years later my parents went on a trip with friends visiting Carrot River along the way. Mother wanted to speak to the druggist. After introducing herself she asked if he had ever heard of the doctor from Nipawin by the name of Doctor MacCauley. “Who?” he asked. “There has never been a doctor with that name and I have been here for thirty-five years. Why do you ask?” Mother said she quickly told him the story as briefly as she could. Finally as though words had just come into his mouth he said in astonishment, “That guy was no doctor! He was a veterinarian! No people doctor. He treated some people but he was mostly self-trained for animal care.” Mother was deflated. This was the man that saved her life. Mother had been told by her parents that Doctor MacCauly thought the thirty-mile trip in an open wagon would have likely led to her death due to the severe condition she was in. All these years Mother and her family thought of him as a hero. No one was going to take that away from either her or Doctor MacCauly. For the next while Louis and I drove along in a quiet conversation as to what we would have done or what should have been done. Louis thought it was a miracle that my mother survived. So many things could have gone wrong in the blink of an eye. We talked about how things in medicine have improved.

Louis expressed his feelings as to how brave he thought that man was to undertake such a frightening operation. It may have been his first. Now that did not make me feel better! This evening we once again reminisced about our day together visiting his son. When Louis had left me a while after we arrived home I felt like I was floating on a cloud. It had been such a delightful day. When he whispered in my ear that I was the light of his life all I could say was, “Oh Louis!” Then he added, I promise I will try to not rush you, Anna. Thank you was all I could say in barely a whisper. My heart was thumping so hard I know he could hear it. I shared with him my feelings that evening. How the second he closed the door I was wishing he wasn’t going to leave me. By the time I looked into his eyes there were tears dripping down my cheeks. I had only been this open with Bud. I often wonder if I am making the wrong decision? I knew I did not want to lose this kind and gentle man, but if I wait too long will I?

The next day I stopped at the post office to check for mail for me. Perhaps this time there will be some word from Hannah. There was. I was so excited I could barely wait to get home. I did not want to open it before I was inside just in case it held some sad news. I sat my purse on a kitchen chair and began to rip the envelope to pieces to get to the letter as quickly as possible. The first thing I noticed was that it was in Hannah’s handwriting and not Gus. It can’t be too bad, I thought.

Dear Anna Well it seems it was His will for this trial drug to help me. I was told if nothing unforeseen should happen to me, I could possibly live ten years. Now it has been that ten years and I am enjoying life to the best of my desire. There is one more thing on my wish list. That is to see you again. I told Gus I would like for you and I to go to the local coffee shop wearing our Sunday best and our Sunday hats. We will be the ladies of the day. We can have chocolate cake too. What do you think? Gus said he will be happy to treat us. Gus said that next month he needs to go your way for some business so he will take me along. If you have room we could stay one night. Besides he wants to meet Louis. Yes, good news travels fast! We are happy for you. I do not wish to worry you, but since we said many years ago we both would let the other know what is happening. Now I wanted to celebrate my good news with you. Should there be anything different to say I will write you. Until then, Your loving sister, Hannah

As time suddenly seemed to drag the day arrived when Gus and Hannah arrived. I was so excited. Tito was eager to see his Uncle Gus again. He wanted to share his car times with him. Luella had so much to share she was brimming over with excitement for her Auntie Hannah. Whenever I look at Hannah I think of how her mother was called Hannie. I knew these few days would be filled to the brim with family chatter. I planned in my mind meals for each of the three days. Sleeping would be tight but we would manage. Since Tito had the most private room of all of us he suggested that he loan out his bed. He would sleep on the floor in the kitchen. That would mean lying with his head under the table. Our kitchen was not large. It was narrow and long. It was easily filled to capacity when there were more than three people. But I had a system. No excuse for everyone not to help. With the oven door open no one could . Before the table was set it would need to be pulled away from the back door. It was tight but Tito assured me he could squeeze in. That would be his spot. Luella picked the front corner of the table as her spot. Most important was that we would all be together. The night before they left Louis was invited to us for dinner. Gus insisted that dinner would be at the Rascal Rally Diner where we would be his guest. Louis had preordered wine and as well, a decadent dessert for us all. His treat. At the back corner was a large round table that I had never seen before reserved for us. We all sat comfortably as we ate, chatted and sipped catching up on times past. I especially enjoyed sitting next to Louis with his arm draped over the back of my chair. While I am not a big alcohol drinker I must say I did enjoy my glass of this deep cherry red drink. I was surprised just how well Gus and Louis knew each other. There were times that a couple tears sprung loose dripping down our cheeks. No one was exempt or seemed to care. The other patrons came and went. Some ladies took a second glimpse of the pretty flowers on our table. I knew it was Louis to thank. He seems to always think of flowers and/or candy. Back at my place Hannah said she was amazed at how he kept everyone included in the conversation. Frank was there too. Gus said he met with his approval which totally embarrassed Luella as we all chuckled. He was now a

permanent part of our family. Any day now the sparkles will arrive. Will Bubba walk her down the aisle or will it be her Uncle Gus? Hannah had been full of questions regarding my job at Hibbard’s. Shortly before they arrived I had received a promotion. One that was so big it increased my pay. Not just by a few pennies but by numerous dollars. I had been so overwhelmed I could barely sleep at night from thinking of how this would now make my life easier. Now I knew that after I paid my rent and other bills I would have some left over. On occasion I could purchase some material just for me. First I will need to buy myself a new pair of shoes before I am walking barefoot. The last time I had new soles put on them, the cobbler said he would not be able to repair them again. I had also seen some house slippers that were reasonably priced in our footwear department. Oh how my feet will like that. Christmas is also coming a little closer each day. Will there also be bells ringing in our home? Before I knew it winter was on our doorstep. The warm air had turned into a brisk wind leaving behind the gentle breezes. Snowflakes have been falling for the last couple days. The bare tree branches were dusted with white powder. Soon they will be waking to sparkling ice crystals biting into their winter coats. We are fortunate for the stand of pines next to our home that breaks the wind. The time has come for winter hats, scarves, gloves and boots. Now I not only need to carry a lunch to work, but I must also carry a pair of shoes to change into before going to the drapery department. But still most mornings I am excited to begin my day. Winter fabrics have been arriving each day. The lighter summer fabrics moved to the back corner of our department. This was our Sell for Less corner of the floor. Much to my surprise Lily stopped in to say hello as well as to invite me for dinner. She seems to have a special knack for picking up on just when I could use a friend. A friend that does not carry baggage. I try to not feel imposed on when Wanda needs a shoulder to help her through her tough times. There is always the possibility that one day it may be ourselves. While she meandered through the many bolts of fabric I helped several customers that had been waiting for a few minutes. That gave Lily time to choose just which fabrics she would like. When she said she chose a couple, I

thought perhaps two or three. Well, it turns out she couldn’t resist the six different arrays of Christmas fabrics. She was going to sew some gifts for her children to put in with their parcels. It keeps her busy and happy. A few evenings later I was in their beautiful bright kitchen sitting at the table with Lily and Arnold enjoying a very tasty dinner. Our dinner was complimented by a dark moist chocolate cake, my favourite dessert. My table boasted an oil table cloth while hers was a pretty white fabric with little flowers neatly embroidered. The kind you need to wash and iron. Her dishes were Bone China with Desert Rose pattern. The flowers were in a rose colour with green leaves. The handles on the cups were green as were the edges of the plates and bowls. What I noticed most was that each piece matched. It was lovely, but only half as good as the roast beef dinner. The house had the most delicious aroma of a gourmet dinner having been prepared. Mashed potatoes, carrots and green beans accompanied the roast beef and Yorkshire pudding with rich brown gravy. While I thought I was too full to eat another bite I found myself indulging in my favourite dessert. A dark moist chocolate cake with a spoon full of vanilla ice cream on the side. Yummy! I wandered home feeling over full, but enjoying the after taste of a delightful evening with my new friend. We laughed, we shared and we cried over lost loved ones. We shared the lives of our children how they are so different and yet so much alike. When they come home for Christmas my family and Louis are invited for an evening of Christmas their style. Our families will have an opportunity to meet. Lily is already planning this to be an annual event. Now I am wishing for Louis and my family to share in my enthusiasm. We should start a new tradition. They too have had to adjust to a loss in their family. Now my mind is traveling through ideas of just what I could give each of their families for Christmas. A gift from our house to their house would be appropriate. When Sunday comes I will discuss this with Louis, Tito, Frank and Luella. Perhaps they will have some ideas.

This evening I shall look through my sewing basket just to refresh my memory from last year as to what I have before I purchase things I do not need. I am so excited. I can hardly wait to see the rest of my family on Sunday. I even have some transfers that will be of great help. For me it will be exciting to show them the blue bird transfer I have saved since I was a young girl. This is the transfer my mother used for me when she was showing me as I sat on the floor in the doorway listening to the birds chirp. Now that is if they are all in agreement this would be a good idea to begin our part of the new tradition. Perhaps there will be blue birds everywhere, and then again maybe not.

While the last minute of dinner was being prepared Lily just happened to say that Lily was not always her name. She chose it herself wishing that she could be called by this pretty name instead of Matilda. The boys endlessly sang Waltzing Matilda over and over mimicking her doing the Old Time Waltz until she fell down with her feet spread apart as far as they could make them go. Then they broke into gales of laughter. I felt so bad for her. I would have changed my name too. As it was in those days the adults told her she was to just smile because they were boys being boys. When her friend Constance made a comment to one of the boys in teasing she received a detention. She was told she must not make fun of the boys. That seemed to be the way it was back then. When her daughter was a teenager Lily confided just how much she wanted a different name. The answer was simple. “Mom, change your name to Lily. It won’t cost that much.” By the next evening she had her mind made up. Lily she will be. She had already walked to the Post Office to check on the legality necessary. Seemed very simple. There was a form there for her to fill in and sign that she did. The cost was 50 cents. She happily paid the Post Man. It was done. She could not turn back. He told Mrs. Baker that from that moment on she could assume the given name of her choice. Now it will be Lily. Two weeks later she received a government letter addressed to Lily Baker thanking her for her payment. That was the last she has heard. She has never looked back since. She also said it seemed to help her attitude to feeling more independent. That night at suppertime she was so excited. The others kept looking at her wondering just what was up. As soon as she served dessert she let her family in on her secret that from then on would not be a secret. Arnold was a little shocked. The only one that was about to burst into giggles was her daughter Penny. Her son Will just sat there with his eyes darting back and forth from one to the other. When no one seemed to know what to say Will asked his mother, “So are you

now Lily or are you still Mom?” Everyone knew he was just trying to break the ice so Arnold cleared his throat a couple times. “No Will. To you and Penny she will always be Mom. To me she will be my sweet Lily flower.” The short silence then became deafening. So she shared her feelings and thoughts that had brought her to this stage in her life. “I do hope that each of you will be happy with the decision I made. Penny and Will are forever telling me how much they like their names so I thought why should I not have a name that I really like too,” she said. Penny then spoke up in a more affirmative voice than usual, “Mom and I talked about it. I said if she doesn’t like her name she should change it and so she did. The next day!” With that Penny and Will broke into their usual rowdy laughter. Then Will asked the question that Mrs. Baker had been thinking he likely would. “Who chose my name Mom?” “Your dad and I. You are named after your grandfather. Your dad’s father. He was always called William so to differentiate we thought it would be better to call you Will.” “I am sure glad you did that. I would never wish to be called William. We already have a William in my class at school. He is a real dough dough head. Even Ruben is smarter. Well he is!” “So who am I named after?” asked Penny. “No one, well not really in the same way. Your dad’s mother would always say she wished she had a penny. So when you were born we named you Penny.” “So what did grandma say to that?” asked Penny. “First she laughed and laughed. Then she said, “You know I like that. At least now I know I have a Penny since it seems the other kind never finds its way into my purse. Thank you for giving me a Penny.” For the next few minutes their conversation drifted to Grandma and Grandpa Baker. It seems everyone had something funny to share in their memory bank.

Will and Penny agreed they thought her ginger snap cookies were the best. Mrs. Baker thought so too. Finally Will said, “So Dad, do you any funny times you had with Grandpa when you lived with them?” “Well Grandpa was more of a serious person than I am so we didn’t get too many laughs with him. When he did laugh it was kept inside, but I could tell he was laughing by his chin jiggling.” “There was one time he was going to teach me how to get on a horse the easy way. After being sure to say that I was to watch him and how he does it I made sure my eyes were totally focused so I wouldn’t get a scolding. Then Grandpa led the horse, I think his name was Max, to the corral railing. He stepped up on the top rail with one foot waving his hat in the air just like a real cowboy would. As he took a big leap with the intention on landing on Max’s back, dear old lazy Max moved to the side and Grandpa went down landing in the soft dirt face first. I tried to not laugh but it was so funny I couldn’t help myself. By the time I was there to help him up he was standing. Without ing that I could hear, he gave Max a slap on the back as he said, ‘Max, you silly bugger. Why did you do that?’ As soon as he ed I was there he said, “Don’t you dare tell your mother I used that word. She will give us both a scolding.” “Don’t think so, Dad. Just you. Glad you are alright,” I said. Seemed to me they have told this story so many times they know it like they are reading a book, but all the same I enjoyed them sharing it with me. Frank and Louis just sat quietly as they took it all in. By the smiles they wore I knew they were enjoying hearing of the Baker family just as I was. Well, I have one more bit of news to share with each of you. Earlier in the week Lily Baker came into the store to purchase some fabric. While there she invited me for dinner a few evenings later. While the three of us sat enjoying our dessert and coffee Mrs. Baker told me Penny and Will along with their families will be home for Christmas. They have

invited all of us over on Boxing Day. She also suggested that perhaps we could make this a tradition where our two families get together each year. So how do you all feel about that? Even though they all spoke at once I did manage to make out they thought that would be fun. I agree with you all. I thought it might be nice if we could give something to them to start this off. I wondered all the way home what we could do. Finally I thought Luella and I could make a Christmas tree skirt for each of the three families this year. I have lots of embroidery threads here along with embroidery stamps. Would that be a nice idea? After they all nodded, Luella said Tito, Frank and Bubba could help with the embroidering. By the time she finished her sentence she was laughing so hard we could barely make out what she was saying. “I don’t think so! Do you guys think that is a smart idea?” Tito asked. “Not really,” said Frank. “There must be something else we can do to contribute.” “I have an idea,” said Bubba “It is a man idea, but I don’t think we will get thrown out for doing it. I will tell you both after when we are in the other room. So, I asked is it settled then that I can let Lily know we would love to them? we must contribute both in preparation and clean up. Just as they all started to verbalize their agreement Luella said she had a question. “Mom, can you make a new apron for you and I this year?” Of course I can. That is a great idea. We will talk before we turn in for the night. To say I retired for the night full of bubbles rolling around in my stomach is an understatement. For the first time since we lost Bud I feel that life is turning rosy for us all. The next couple weeks the weather had turned miserable. The wind was cold. It was no longer whispering. It was shouting. At times it was bitter cold. The air definitely had a bite to it. The sun rarely showed itself. It was not pleasant to be outdoors, but for some of us we still had to be. It was our way to work and school.

Walking to the bus stop it was harsh. The wind was so strong I couldn’t keep my hat on my head so I changed to wearing my scarf over my head and then wrapping it around my neck leaving it hanging down in front of me. Memories of a previous experience still lingered with me. There was no way I could go outside without my wool gloves. Just when it seems we can relax without our winter attire nature has a surprise for us. Not only does it surprise us, but also the leaves on the branches as they take on their new spring look. The birds have gone into hiding inside the branches where they receive protection from the gusts trying to blow them away. How can those thin little legs hang on so strong I wonder. In this time I made a new apron for Luella and one for myself. I thought of doing the same for Lily, but thought it may be better to wait until I have seen just what she has which will tell me her taste. There will be another year for sure.

Chapter Seven

One evening after Frank, Tito, and Bubba returned from working on their Christmas project we were sitting in the living room chatting about our day when Tito’s face lit up. “Bubba. You said you had an interesting story to share. Will you tell us tonight?” “Sure,” said Bubba. “Once upon a time there were some little boys and girls.” As hard as he tried he couldn’t keep the smile off his face. “Ok. This is not a fairy tale. This is real, but it was a long time ago. “When I was about five years old my mother said that we were going to get a new baby brother on Sunday. Well, you should have seen the look on our faces. We were in shock. There had not been anything said to any of us before this. I didn’t want a baby, brother or sister because I was the baby and no one was to take my special place in my family. This family belonged to me and no one else. With a gloomy face I sat on the floor with my siblings to hear what our parents had to say. “Baby Wayne was coming to live with us. His mommy could not look after him. He is two weeks old. If any of you wish to help me prepare his room for him I will begin tomorrow. I could always use a little extra help, said Mother. Well I was not going to help and that was that. “Sunday came. We all went to church with no baby. We left church with no baby. I began to feel a little better. Just maybe we will not be getting a baby. I still was not going to smile. All the way home I kicked stones as I walked even though I usually get a scolding for scuffing my shoes. I didn’t care. I was the one that had to clean them. This would be no different. “As soon as we arrived home I ran into the house taking my coat off as I ran. Then from the corner of my eye I spied something sitting in the middle of the front room. It was a basket. There sat a brown basket on tall legs. As much as I really wanted to, I would not go over and take a peek. Not even a quick peek. Who wants a baby? Not me! “Soon my siblings were inside running to the basket. They seemed to know that it was THE baby inside. How did they know when I didn’t? There were squeals of delight from my sisters with only large wide eyes from my brother. Everyone was iring this delightful baby except me.

“In a while my mother came into my room. While she gently lifted me up wrapping her arms around me she soothingly spoke to me explaining how I was still their special boy. Wayne would never take my place in her heart. Her arms were big enough for all of us. But now there were six of us. That is just too many. Wayne should go. “The next few days were filled with Wayne this and Wayne that. It will never get better. My life is gone. Soon no one will want me. I am just too big. I don’t fit in the basket. “One day when I was playing with my car on the floor Wayne sat watching me from his rocker seat where he was strapped in so as to not fall out. Suddenly he became very excited. He started to talk to me in some foreign language that I could not understand. Just when I was sure there was no one watching I looked over. “Wayne was watching me with his big toothless grin. His arms were flailing from one direction to the other as the drool ran down his chin. His eyes sparkled. I could not resist from putting my finger close to his hand. In a second he had a hold that was like his death grip as he gurgled to me in that same strange language. I found myself smiling as I whispered a few words to him. This became our secret each time I thought no one was near. “To me it seemed much too soon that he began to roll everywhere he wanted to go. Every time it was to me. As I listened to the oohs and ahhs I began to smile when my family was watching. They praised me for the way I was able to get our baby to be happy. “One day when my siblings and I were on the floor my Aunt Jean came to visit going straight to Wayne. Her first words were ‘Mommy loves you.’ “I threw my car down running from the room as fast as I could go as the large tears rolled down my cheeks. They have lied to me. Whose kid is this anyway? When Aunt Jean went to leave I refused to come out of my room to say goodbye. I was devastated! “As we all sat at the table that evening to enjoy one of my mother’s good dinners I just could not eat. I still was having the odd sob that I could not hide. “My mother began. ‘I think it is time that I explain clearly just who Wayne is

and why he is living with us. “ ‘Your Aunt Jean is my sister. She has always, at least for as long as I can wanted to be alone. Always by herself. She would go behind the straw stack and sit for hours not saying a word. Then when she became a teenager she from somewhere unknown to us, made friends with a boy that too was not sociable. Somehow they understood each other. They became friends. “ ‘One day my mother noticed that she was moping around. She did not look well. Our father noticed too but never said anything unless he did to mother after we all went to bed. “ ‘A couple days later Mother and Aunt Jean went to town. Without asking we knew we had to stay home. None of us said anything. My brother spent extra time playing with me which he usually didn’t like to do because I was a little kid. Today we had fun together. I found that I liked having a brother to play with. “ ‘Nothing was said to us when Mother returned. It became clear that the closer Aunt Jean came to delivering the less stable she became. Aunt Jean would not be capable of taking her baby home to live with her. “ ‘Then the doctor asked me if we would take her baby so as to not have this baby go to live somewhere far away in an orphanage. Your father and I decided that it was just something that we knew we had to do. If anything tragic would happen to our family we would not want for any one of you to go to the orphanage. We just knew that the right thing to do was to take him into our family. “ ‘I am not sure just when we were going to tell you kids, but somehow the time got away. Tomorrow just didn’t come. Now by the slip of your Aunt Jean’s tongue the day is here. “ ‘It is best if we are all just one family as we have no signed papers from your Aunt Jean and her estranged friend for us to raise Wayne. Wayne needs to be your brother. When he is much older we will see what he wishes to be called.’ “Every time I think of it I wonder if Wayne wonders just who he really is. In the meantime I have grown to love having a younger brother. I cannot imagine my life without him around. He is kind, caring, happy and full of hugs and mischief. Whether he is my brother or my cousin he is a part of our family. I never think of

him as being anything other than a brother. He is just one of us. He gets his scoldings just like we do. He calls our parents Mom and Dad the same as we do.” As we all sat in a trance for a few minutes Tito finally said, “Wow.” No more was said as no one knew just what to say. That night it was as though the air in our house was filled with something heavy. I think we each knew just how fortunate we were.

We were all super busy with Christmas moving in day by day. Luella was busy at work making fancy cakes for parties. She can barely keep up. She has a hidden talent that I did not realize. Like most mothers, I am so very proud of her. At church and work I receive compliments on her cakes. She has become known for miles around. Imagine having a famous daughter. Frank is so proud. He never hesitates to tell others of his talented wife to be. Ohh? Wife? With some counselling from Louis Tito has become quite the car guy. He sure can fix a lot of them around town. Tito just recently was hired by the largest garage in town. He is their number one mechanic. Customers ask for him. Louis told me that he is always whistling and so has been tagged as The Whistling Mechanic. That is a interesting nickname at least compared to some I hear. Seems everyone must have a nickname these days. I shall never know why. Work at the store is getting busier every day. Saturdays are madness. Everyone is afraid they won’t get waited on or maybe they are worried if we will still take their money. No fret there! At the end of the day we are literally urging them to leave so we can clean up before our day is done. It seems bolt after bolt is sold out. The stock boy is kept ever so busy replacing our inventory for us. It seems to me that each new shipment is nicer than the last. Each bolt always has a new pattern. Holly and poinsettias are the most popular. Customers are daily snagging them up, yard by yard. Lily has been in as well. One day I noticed that she intentionally chose to have Muriel wait on her making as though she didn’t really know when I would be available. Hmm. Wonder what she is up to? Last week on Monday morning as soon as the doors opened Wanda stopped in. I had no idea that she likes to sew as she has never mentioned anything about sewing. Her purchase was small but important to us just like all the other customers. She needed a spool of thread. As she needed to run off to work we did not chat long besides there already was a line up waiting to be served. I did agree to stop at the diner for a coffee on Wednesday. While I had a lot of preparations to do before this special holiday I truly did wish to spend a few minutes with my friend that I feel as though I have been

neglecting lately. Wednesday came and so did a day of decent weather. The dawn of a new day where the air smelled fresh and clean was a welcome to everyone. The sun was brightly shining just as though it was there until dusk begins to fall. I so enjoyed my walk to the Diner. Working inside is great on miserable days, but do like to take advantage of the days that are nice where the wind is just a whisper as the warm sun breaks through the thin wispy clouds. It was late morning by the time I got myself ready to go turning into a good thing. Hot dogs for lunch were on the menu. As usual Wanda said we were being treated. I can’t just when I had a hot dog last. I must to make a hot dog on occasion for when Tito and Luella are home. Now that they have grown up I no longer think of purchasing those items that young children always ask for even though we all still enjoy them from time to time. For some reason it was quieter than usual for a Wednesday morning giving Wanda and I a moment to ourselves. I was pleased to hear from her that things have settled down. For Curtis he now has extra time to be serving due to his little escape. He can no longer enjoy the privilege of communicating with Wanda. Wanda can once again sleep in peace. She says for the next couple years she no longer fears for her life. It just may be a long time before he can even request parole. Not long enough for Wanda. Her physical bruises have healed. To the public she looks just the same. Word has spread quickly. Ladies just patted the top of her hand. Some had a hug to share, but no one said a word. Wanda told me she still has a couple broken ribs that are not completely healed. It is coming but slowly. For Christmas she will go to stay with her sons. Just for a couple days. She says she will be home again on Boxing Day. She finds it easier to cope if she has something to do each day, and some place that she needs to go. By the time she returns at night she is too tired to think of her past. So often after having spent time with Wanda I either do not sleep well the first night or I dream crazy dreams that are always pretty much the same. I dream of the dark nights when I am standing at the window peering out into a

forest of tall trees. There I see the shadow of someone lurking between the trees wearing a long dark coat with steely eyes that can be seen from afar. They always light up like that of a coyote or wolf. They make no sound. They look at my window as though they can see me. Those eyes seem to know what it is I am doing. Has someone followed me home? Then I dream of the young farm girl I was arriving into town life with no idea of what lay before me. My dress is always well worn, my hair was long and unkempt. I wore no shoes. I had no coat, but I was never cold. I did not shiver. I hid behind a large fir tree where I thought no one could see me. I could see the long black coat. I was not afraid. In some of my dreams the moonlight would be peeking in between the trees leaving room for a friendly wolf to sit waiting for morning to come. Weird dreams. Nothing ever made any sense. As much as they would leave me, they eventually always came back. Those were the nights when I looked forward to seeing the light of day peek between the curtains.

With only ten days left until it would be Christmas, Louis thought it would be a good idea to visit his son Vance. What a great idea. It would be a time to get away and relax spending time together. Our chores will wait for another day. Then maybe I can detect just what Vance has on his calendar for his own Christmas plans. I would like to very much invite him to spend Christmas Day with my family as his dad will be with us anyway. Tito and Luella and Frank have not met Vance as of yet so this could be the perfect time. As we drive I shall bring the subject up to Louis. Being the typical male he had no idea. “Have you asked him?” I asked. As I expected, he looked at me as though to say why would I? This left me to take it for a no. As we drove along in silence for a short while, he looked at me with a guilty smile. “I guess I should have eh?” “Well, Louis that would be nice. Just so he won’t think you are too busy with seeing me to include him. He is always welcome into my family. Besides it is time my family meets him.” “You are right. So will you help me out with this today? Usually I have no problem but today seems to be different. I just think I need a little help.” “And some urging?” I said with a smile in my voice. Little did I know that Louis was once again treating us to a lovely meal at their favourite cafe. Yummy! When we arrived there sat Vance with a pretty young lady at his side. Stealing a quick glance at Louis I knew this was a surprise to him as well. Just as I expected Vance stood to introduce his lady friend to us. Her name is Stella Anderson. For some reason that name seemed to ring a bell but couldn’t put it together. Perhaps it is just my imagination. It soon became clear that she was not a new friend but a serious one. Soon we were nearing the dessert time and still Louis made no mention of Christmas Day. Now what shall I do. It is too close to Christmas to not get things organized so I asked Stella if she was all ready for the big day.

Her mouth fell open. She looked at Vance. “Did you tell your dad?” she asked in a shaky voice. “No my dear. I didn’t. Somehow I believe that Anna is thinking of Christmas Day. Are you Anna?” “Yes, I was. Should there be something else that I tripped up on?” Now I was trying my best to not laugh as I knew just what had happened. Clearly Louis still had not figured it out. He continued to have that puzzled look on his face that brought Vance and Stella to a near hysteria. Finally Vance spoke. “Dad and Anna. Yes we have something to share with you both. Did you not notice this Dad?” With that he held Stella’s left hand up in the air for all to see. Then she began to wiggle her fingers. Finally Louis caught on, jumping up. He was around the table in a flash hugging both his son and his daughter-in-law to be. When I thought it was time I could gently step in as I too stood to the sweetest words I could hear. “Anna, my dear. Since you are now a permanent part of my life you should be in on this hugging.” When tears were wiped and shaky nerves settled we all sat down holding hands around the table. To my delight Stella said that she would like to offer a short prayer. It was short but meaningful. I am going to like this girl. With a glass of champagne for each in a excited toast to the happy couple Louis began to ask questions. “So son, when were you going to tell me?” “Next Sunday,” said Vance with a chuckle. “How is that?” asked Louis. “Well we planned to surprise you. We were going to visit you in the afternoon. I kind of wanted to dine at the Rascal Rally Diner that we have heard so much about.”

“Can we still do that Anna? asked Louis. “Perhaps Tito, Luella and Frank can us too. That would give them all an opportunity to meet each other. By the way, Anna and I would like you both to be with us on Christmas Day.” No one could miss the hopeful look in Louis’ eyes. “We would love to, wouldn’t we Vance?” asked Stella. “We sure would! Shh, but I will ask Stella to make her delicious jam sandwich cookies.” As we rode home dusk was beginning to sweep in. We were enjoying this special day that time had gotten away on us. Next Sunday the seven of us met at the Diner. Everyone was getting acquainted even though it sounded as though they had all known each other for years. Louis and I tended to sit back and take them all in. Their craziness was bringing laughter to our table. I thought that Luella and Stella had made instant friends. As we settled down a little more to enjoy our dessert of chocolate cake with ice cream, Vance’s favourite Stella said, “Anna I am sure this is where my cousin Sally works. Have you ever heard of her?” Ah, so that is where I have heard the name before. Trying to remain calm, I said, “Yes. Actually we have become friends for some time now. I don’t believe she normally works on a Sunday.” As if on queue Mr. Cook came out of the kitchen heading straight for our table. “Why hello Anna, he said. “So nice to see you all here. You too Louis. And here is my favourite cake decorator,” he said giving Luella a wink. Following introductions Mr. Cook excused himself to return to his kitchen duties. I didn’t know what to say to Stella. After a moment of silence Stella spoke. “So Anna, by any chance are you the friend that Sally has made that she has finally shared her terrible secret with?” “Yes, I am Stella. We met in the grocery store. It seemed that that is where we both go at the same time. Then we began to enjoy a cup of coffee together. She is an excellent waitress.” Now keep quiet Anna, I thought before I get myself in trouble.

“I am so happy to know that. Sally is truly my favourite cousin but, forgive me, that donkey that she married is on my hate list. Now that is not Christian like but he does treat her very badly. Guess you already know that.” As I noticed the tears well up in her pretty sky blue eyes I nodded nudging Louis on the leg to take over. My poor Louis. All he could think of to say was something about their drive here that had already been said. Frank ever so alertly stepped in to help ease the day. That evening Luella said to me, “Mom do you think that maybe you could make Stella an apron too? It might make her feel like we have accepted her as part of our family. I know it would me.” That night I couldn’t sleep so I got up and organized my sewing supplies for another apron. Such a good idea! As I carefully peeked inside I discovered that I have a lot of a soft lavender threads. It would look very nice on the pale yellow fabric background. Tomorrow as soon as I am home, and have dinner over with I shall begin. The following day Luella can begin her fancy embroidery. There are still plenty of patterns for her to choose from. As I climbed back into bed I began to relive the day. I wondered just how the guys’ project is coming. I wonder what it will be but have no doubts it will be great and appropriate for our new friends. I promised myself I would not try to guess. I shall just enjoy their surprise along with the others. I never thought when Bud was taken that I would have such a wonderful day again. Today was filled with happiness once more for Tito and Luella as well as me. We were all truly happy. They were both filled with laughter as they were kibitzing with each other throughout the day. Later in the evening Luella and Frank had said they were going for a drive. Frank wanted to show her the nightlights shining across the water in Stanley Park. Being a mother I was hoping that was all he was going to show her. Tito retired to his room to look through a book that Louis had given him on car mechanics. Tucked inside near the back was a note to look on the back porch. There sat a box filled with tools that Louis said he no longer could use. Tito just had to bring them into the living room to show me. They were so shiny that it was clear Louis had polished each one until they shone. Tito was thrilled.

Louis had given Luella a pretty circular brooch with her favourite coloured pink gemstones. To say she loved it was definitely an understatement. She danced and danced around the living room showing it off ending with a hug for Louis. He was beaming. It has become obvious that she was becoming more and more fond of him and him of her. One day she said to me that Louis will never be her father but he sure is a great substitute daddy. I had managed to locate a book for Louis that he requested. Before retiring for the night he likes to unwind with a favourite book. This was a book I had seen him iring more than once. For me he chose a beautiful necklace with matching earrings in gold, real gold plated, dotted with pearls. Luella and Tito rushed over to me to have a closer look as they expressed their amazement. Tito gave one of his big whistles that was not allowed in the house. With a quick hug he whispered sorry Mom but it is a beauty. What is coming next? I chose to not answer that. Vance and Stella left shortly after dinner. They both repeated how they enjoyed their day. Stella and Luella have become fast friends. I had to chuckle when they opened their gifts to each other, a Diary both with small pink cherry blossoms on the front cover. Now I know they both shopped in the stationery department at Hibbard’s. Tito proudly showed me his special rasp file Louis gave him. It is just like the one Louis uses for most of his woodworking projects he went on to say. I also learned from my son that files only cut in one direction. Louis explained to him that you do not file back and forth as the teeth will become clogged. They discussed it ever so many times throughout the day. Clearly it was a favourite gift for Tito. It is becoming more and more Louis this and Louis that. When Vance said it was the kind of gift he would give to his brother tears welled in everyone’s eyes. Louis and I looked at each other with special feelings coming to each of us. What is happening? Are things moving too fast? Our parcels were all wrapped for tomorrow. I made a batch of rich buttery Thumb Print cookies with both red and green cherry centers to take in a pretty Christmas tin. While Lily said not to bring any food I just really wished to take something that we like at Christmas time. Before Louis left for home he brought up the subject of their gift for the Baker family.

“So Anna, did you think it would ?” Louis? It was exquisite! This is such a great idea. The idea of making the two a slight bit smaller, one for each Will and Penny with a little different style will impress them all. Candles are something everyone likes. Not many will have such a lovely holder to place them in. Thank you so much for making Tito and Luella’s Christmas so special. I think now we can all move on without that lonely empty feeling gnawing at us. It was a while before Louis and I wished to part. As we stood inside the door holding each other as we covered our lips and cheeks in kisses I knew then that one day I would be able to give my answer. As for my heart, yes it would be included. First I will talk it over with Bud, then Hannah and Tito and Luella. While I want to feel comfortable with my decision I also wish for those that are special to Bud and I to feel the same.

Vance and Stella would not be going with us as they were spending the day with her family. Being the youngest of four children she is the only one at home. Her two sisters will be home along with their little ones. They have made this the day for the Anderson family to be together. As for us, it was such a delightful day. The Bakers made us feel as a though we were truly a part of their family. I am not sure how many times Arnold made the comment that Will and Tito should have been brothers. Yes, the mischief kind.

Chapter Eight

Sometimes Vance has taken Will along to help when he goes on a Big Brother outing. They go for hikes returning for a campfire with hot dogs and marshmallows followed by a sing-song that leads into the dark night with chaperones leading the fun. Will has found himself befriending another fellow about his own age that has no parents, and so lives with his grandparents. He returns home with that feeling that he too has reached out to someone in need. Maybe one day Will will also be a Big Brother. I was not surprised to hear that Stella is a Big Sister. Apparently that is where Vance and Stella met. There was an area meeting to be held in order to share ideas for outings and perhaps two local field trips a year. It was totally out of bounds for the two groups to go together. That could be an opening for trouble with teenage hormones being what they are. But on separate days they could enjoy the same outing. I noticed Luella perk up when Stella was telling of some of their fun times as well as some of the difficult outings. It is not rare for a youth to act out particularly if they are new to the group and have had trouble adapting to a new life. This is happening more with the Big Brothers than the Big Sisters. Girls tend to keep things to themselves and become sullen whereas the boys will act out creating a disturbance in one way or the other. Apparently she asked Stella if she could accompany her, but was told it would be too far. However Stella has a friend living in the same area as us. She would be willing to her on Luella’s behalf. That is such a good idea. I do hope it works out. It is a great program with so many young people experiencing changes in their family life. I also feel it is good for Tito and Luella to see there are others with broken family troubles. After a moment of silence Frank cleared his throat. Looking at the floor he said he has a nephew that he spends time with because his father was killed in a car accident. This young lad was twelve at the time. Suddenly he had no one to go for a Saturday bike ride with to Buntzen Lake. So Frank bought himself a second-hand bike, and with some persuasion his nephew has agreed to ride with him. It was only last Saturday that Frank said he felt he had relaxed knowing that Daniel was accepting him as a friend and not trying to replace his father. They have talked about school, home life, life among his friends. How that big

change has affected him. Frank went on to say that it is not our responsibility to change their values. Through your example your Little may come to respect values that are more positive. This may be a long process so we must be patient. Reinforcing this behaviour with positive remarks is a delicate way without hurting feelings. Try to they also learn by example. Point out and praise their strengths. Not all Big Brothers and Big Sisters find themselves a match with their first Little. Every leader has training before they begin. You are not just thrown out there for the wolves. There is leadership assistance. The Big Brothers program began in Canada in 1913 with the Big Sisters having been formed in Canada in 1912. Canada’s home city was Toronto. This is where it all was formed for the Sisters and then the Brothers. Frank told us how he asked his dad if he had helped to form the Big Brothers program, “After all,” he said, “I knew he was pretty old. Well old to a twelve year old. After my dad got over the shock and my mom started to laugh she said, ‘You know Frank your father is old but not that old.’ I shall never forget that moment. Not sure if I was more disappointed that he was not one of the famous men or what.”

It seems that Frank and Luella’s outing to view the lights was just that although she did say they talked a lot about their future. Now my ears really perked up. Tito was just hanging his coat up as he came home for dinner. I knew by the look on his face he did not know just what they had talked about. Those two always share these things with each other before they even so much as drop a hint to me. Another sign I am Mother. Just as I thought it was another few days before Luella casually told me that she is expecting to receive a ring from Frank. Before I could say any more she said that Tito was glad. He likes Frank. Apparently he thinks Frank will make a good brother. Now I am getting that what do you think look? I agreed with all she said. While she is young I did even without her reminding me that Bud and I were young too. I took this opportunity to let her know that no matter how much her dad and I loved each other, there were days when we both just thought it was more of a like than a love and so kept our distance. I think that if Bud was here he would be saying, “I when I thought there were days when you did not really even like me, but those were only the times that I smelt like the barn when I came in for dinner.” I would just return his smile. It was after these difficult days that were mostly caused by poverty that we would go outside for a walk around our place with only the light of the silvery moon to show us the way. With the howl of the wolves in the distance and the caw of the Owls creating a nocturnal ambience we felt at home. It was our home. To that Luella said, “I know Mom. I those were the days when you two did not talk to each other. Tito thinks you still kept your promise to always say goodnight with a kiss. Did you Mom?” “Yes we did. It was hard sometimes but we both knew how much we wanted our marriage to work so we worked at it. You both will need to as well. Besides I had never met anyone that I would even try to love.” As we chatted for the next hour it became clear that she had been thinking this over very carefully which was good news to me. She shared her thoughts what

Frank had as a prospective husband both in expectations and what he must contribute. She had shared her thoughts and feelings with him too. “You know Mom, this is kind of changing the subject but did I tell you about the elderly man that lives in the little slab house near the edge of town where the blacksmith lives?” “No you did not Luella. What about him?” “He comes in about once a month to get a loaf of cinnamon bread. Apparently that is when his daughter comes to visit him. We always put a few cookies in the bag without him seeing us do it. He tries to sound grumpy about her coming just to check on him. We think it is his way of being independent and tough. Anyway last time when he came in he was just leaving when he lost his balance. Fortunately he was saved from a terrible fall by another customer entering. We got a chair for him and some water. After a few minutes he seemed to recover. He was so eager to be on his way even though we felt he maybe should not walk alone. “The customer coming in said they were neighbours and so they would walk together. He tended to not pay any attention to the elder man’s grumbling as he took him by the elbow winking to us as they left. “Just before we closed he came back to make his purchase. We already knew that he buys two loaves of bread so we made sure to save it for him. We were then quickly filled in on their acquaintance. “From his kitchen window he can view Old George’s place so he is able to know if he is up and about. He tells us Old George is a very poor, proud and private man. He does not like company, at least so he says. The daughter tries her best. One day she was able to tell him that she wants him to move in with her, but it is not even open for discussion. He just gets upset so she has decided to not upset his apple cart any further by asking him to move in with her and her family. “The neighbour also told us that Old George refuses anything from a church as that is charity as he does not need or want it. So what can our little community do?” “Guess there isn’t much. I knew there is an older man that is on our church prayer list. I just did not know who it was, but likely this man, Old George.”

For the remainder of the evening he kept coming to my mind. It has been so cold outside we just need to hope and pray that he has enough wood for his stove and food to eat. The following evening I spoke to Louis about this. Did he have any idea how we could help without upsetting George? To my surprise a smile crossed over his gentle face. “Now please do not let on you know anything about this. Not even your family because I do not want them to have to keep a secret from others. Better to not honestly be able to know than have to cover for it. “During the night when the moon is not out my neighbour and I sneak up and add logs to his woodpile. So far he has never seemed to notice that there is always a full wood box. You know Anna, I suspect Old George nips a fair bit, but who can blame him?” “Oh Louis that is so kind of you. Do not worry, I shall keep your secret.” With that our evening concluded with the usual sharing of our day. There did not seem to be anything of difference happening. Just as we were saying, or kissing, goodnight he said, “I nearly forgot to ask you if you would be interested in going to visit Gus and Hannah on Wednesday. It would not be for a long visit but thought you would find a couple hours better than none. I need to discuss some business with Gus. What do you think?” “I sure would. There is not anything I am doing that I cannot put off for another evening in order to do two of my favourite things. One is extra time with you and the other is with Hannah. Gus too!” As I prepared for bed I thought of that little old house that appears to have been forgotten. Only our townsfolk are aware there is still someone living there. Both doors are so rickety it is amazing they do not fall off. The upstairs window has been boarded over. There are no curtains just some old sheets covering the windows. Two very old rocking chairs sit at the front next to the door. A large willow tree grows tall and crocked alongside the house. The wild grass comes and goes as the weather allows. The wood box sat under the tree lending itself to shelter the split logs. Why does pride always get in our way?

Wednesday morning came with the sun shining into my bedroom between the break in the two curtains quickly letting me know that today is going to be a special day filled with sunshine and roses. I made my bed with lightning speed rushing to the kitchen to prepare a pot of coffee. The fragrant smell will bring both Tito and Luella out of bed in a rush for their morning brew. Now that they are old enough to prepare their own breakfast I no longer have to wonder just what I will make. They each like to tend to their own desires in the morning. Seems they have no idea just what they would like before having some hot coffee in their tummies. First thing I knew we were pulling up to the front of Gus and Hannah’s home. What an attractive cottage they have in the middle of town. Gus has been busy keeping it repaired and painted. Everywhere we could see Hannah’s green thumb has been hard and tenderly at work. The front yard was bordered with a ring of bright orange marigolds surrounding the rich green grass. Inside was a smaller ring of blue Tital Pool Veronicas intermixed with a carpet of white alyssum showing another plush carpet of lush green grass. The showy alyssum looks as though it is a pretty white welcome mat. Next to the front steps was healthy tall Candy Tuft the colour of sheepskin snuggling up to the soft gentle pink fuchsia bushes. So stunning. We had so much to talk of. Firstly I needed to be reassured that Hannah was feeling fine. Doctors say she is pretty much back to her old self. As long as she takes care, exercises daily, eats healthy and gets plenty of rest she shall too live to be a ripe old age just like her mother did. And just what every woman can do, she is not to overdo it. As promised Gus and Louis returned in time to share a cup of hot coffee with a homemade cinnamon bun before we were to leave for home. Gus made a big show of checking out my fingers, one by one. “Now Gus,” said Hannah. “You promised you would not.” “Would not what?” asked Gus trying to be innocent with that teasing look in his eye. He has always loved to tease Hannah. This may be because Hannah

pretends to be so angry with him. For a couple seconds that is. I think this is their little game. The one they have always played for as long as I can . Most of our drive home we were both quiet. I could tell that Louis was deep in thought about something. I was sure it had something to do with business so I enjoyed the ride in silence as I leaned against his shoulder. Now and again my heavy eyelids would close for a moments rest. Just before we arrived home I ed I wanted to ask Louis how he became friends with Gus Miller. “I do not really know. Somehow somewhere we met and began talking. Then it took off. You know how it is.” When we returned I thought this was not the direction of where I live. With a smirk on his face Louis said, “I think we should stop at the Rascal for dinner. I have some thoughts to share with you. Is that alright?” “You know Louis, any time a woman does not need to cook is alright with her. I am no exception.” We both had a good laugh because it was so true. It was very apparent that Wanda was surprised to see us. Not that she made any such remarks, just the look on her face said it all. At times I felt it was kind of tricky to if I should call her Sally or Wanda. I did not wish to give her secret away. Louis was also always careful to guard my friend’s secret. While we were waiting for our meatloaf dinner to arrive Louis took my hand. Looking into my eyes he said, “Anna, one day when you are ready I would like to marry you. When I do ask you I wish it to be a special day. A day filled with our time together. In the meantime I purchased a piece of land from Gus, on the edge of town. It is the edge that is near Hibbard’s. Not because I want you to always work because I do not. By that time it just might be that you can work a couple days leaving you with a few days to do the things you would like and still have your own spending money for your independence. If you wish to completely retire at that time that will be fine too.” I suddenly felt very hot. My legs were going all rubbery. My head began to spin. The next thing I knew I woke to Louis kneeling beside me on the floor with numerous pairs of eyes searching for answers. A glass of cool clear water was pressed into my hand followed by instructions to just take sips. I knew word would spread like wild fire throughout the town. I began to smile to

myself. The first thing people always ask is she pregnant? Imagine! At my age! Furthermore we both were waiting for marriage, and to each other. I hope so. Now I knew that I must be ready to make a commitment. The next morning at work nothing was said. By lunch time I felt that word had not gotten out. Oh sure! No such luck. Nancy greeted me as well as the others like any other day. I felt pretty certain that Louis would not have mentioned anything to anyone. Still, something felt strange. It was as though everyone was making idle conversation so as to stay away from the topic they would love to discuss. Maybe it is just me that feels that way. Can it be? Nancy was not as bubbly as usual. There was no kibitzing around like there usually is. Someone made mention they were so tired. Was it the weather? I must say it is a bit disappointing when we get those cool dull days. This one was more brittle than usual. Some were wearing their winter coats and hats. Not me. I just cleaned my winter clothing up so it could be sitting to the side of the closet for next fall to arrive. When I arrived home that day Louis was outside waiting for me as he carried a brown cardboard box with steam rising from it. Our supper. He needed to discus some things with me. Hmm gee I wonder what it could be about I thought to myself. As soon as the dishes were cleared, the table wiped and dried Louis opened up his brief case taking out a large folded drawing. Is that a house I asked myself? “Anna, I would like to go over these plans with you as you will live here too. I want it to be suitable for you as well as me. When it becomes too much to clean we will get a girl to help. I also thought that if any of our three children should come to visit it would be nice to have a place for them to stay. You may even wish to have Hannah visit. Gus is fine too.” As we leaned over the table discussing the rooms Louis was comparing the size of each room to my bedroom. That made me laugh. With a strange look Louis asked me, “What is so funny?” “Oh Louis. I think my bedroom will fit into any one of the closets.” “Oh Anna! I did not mean to make fun of your home. As I have told you before I

think it is always so attractive and inviting. You truly do have a good eye for decorating.” as he planted a kiss on my cheek. “I thought their bedrooms should be big enough for cots or cribs. Even though they will be visiting us they should still be the ones to get up at night. Not us.” “You have that right Louis. I think we have both done our share of that. Let them have a turn. And I will be able to dress a nursery and then a child’s room. How much fun that will be? Should we be starting to encourage babies?” “Actually we really should encourage weddings first. Like our own sweetheart.” I knew I was sitting there looking at him like a love-sick teenager. “Oh Louis. You do know how much I love you, do you not?” “I do my darling. How about we work on the house and our future starting now? You can begin making all the plans you wish. I know ladies have a good eye for pretty things. That reminds me. Here is a book I picked up today for you to keep your future wishes in it. You do not have to share any of it with anyone else if you do not wish to.” “Oh my. It is so pretty. You know I love butterflies as they flutter around dancing with each other. Such pretty colours too. I can already think of so much to write. Thank you my sweet man,” I whispered into his ear. After a couple moments to gather my thoughts and emotions we both fixed our eyes on this huge blue print. “Oh. What is this? At first I thought it was the bathroom.” “It is. It is the master bedroom bathroom. It has a partial wall to give you privacy. My father insisted their bathroom be big enough for my mother to keep her privacy. On your side of that partial wall we will have a mirror. I know you like to check to be sure your stockings are straight.” “Ha Ha. Have you caught me checking my stockings? My mother always said that was so important for a lady. Another of her favourite sayings to me as a teenager was ‘you should always look as good going as coming’. She had some sayings that I now find myself using on Luella to which she promptly replies

‘yes grandmother’.” By now Tito had returned standing behind us looking the plans over. Louis began to nudge me. What is his problem I wondered and then it hit me. Tito is humming here comes the bride as he walked away to his room. Cheeky kid.

That night I could not sleep. I stepped out onto the back porch where I thought no one would be able to see me in my nightgown if they too should be up. What a beautiful night it was. The night air was dark and still. The glittering stars and moon made the inky night world sparkle like a snow globe. I was tasting just a little of my heaven. As I ired the bright twinkling stars my mind returned to the time that I as a young farm girl first had a real dream of moving to life in the city. My dreams were filled with important ideas such as ice cream cones, shoes instead of gumboots, stockings with seams up the back and a pretty bedroom instead of a cot in the corner of the always cold farm house. I would no longer be shy, skinny and poor. It was the life of a fairy princess. That would be me. Who would be my prince charming? Little did I know that when we were settled I would meet Bud. At the time I was too young to plan to marry anyone. But I knew that one day I would marry Bud. He was my prince. I would be Mrs. Miller. He was always nice to me, friendly and gentle. He had a beautiful shade of dark brown sparkling eyes that at times winked at me. Soon our feelings were being returned. We were both still too young to share our feelings with anyone much less think of marriage. We just hung out together sneaking a moment to hold hands. Sometimes we just stood extra close so our shoulders touched. I was in heaven. We were falling in love. One day as we were walking to our homes from church he took my hand. I felt all tingly with butterflies in my tummy. Much later he said my cheeks were a pretty pink. He knew I was smitten. I would one day be his wife. Several years later my father cornered me. So far I had always avoided the subject of Bud with either of my parents but today was not to be. “Anna. You are the apple of my eye sweet sunshine.” “Thanks Daddy. You are the best Daddy in the world.” “The next time you see Bud mention to him that I wish to speak with him,” he said with a gentle smile.

With that he turned and walked away but not before I saw his smile begin to take shape. Now I knew he was highly suspicious. Some days later Bud suggested to me that it was time for him to step up and speak to my father. My stomach made a quick somersault. Is it too late to fess up to what I had just not gotten around to telling him, but then we hardly have had a minute alone. I can not just let him walk in there without knowing. Or can I? Sunday afternoon he would come by hopefully to see both my father and I. I knew he was scared by the way he was shaking as we spoke of it. There was nothing I could think of to say that I hoped would ease his nervousness. Sunday afternoon following church we hung around with some of the other younger people our age discussing everything that meant nothing, but avoiding any mention of our future. It was a beautiful day with the sun shining, the birds chirping to each other, the breeze being very gentle. The breeze was just enough so as to keep the mosquitoes at bay I decided I would do some hoeing in the garden. Then mother reminded me not on a Sunday. As she walked away she gave me that quizzical look that said it all. What is it with you today? She had a look that always told us just what she already knew. We would immediately think, Oh no! She knows. Great, I will take my only book, Little Women and sit under the large cluster of birch trees. I will read but with my mind not being on it I knew I would be rereading these pages again. I kept my eyes open for any sign of Bud, but nothing. What has happened? Did he decide to not come? Is he not ready to speak to my father? I felt deflated. Was this his way of breaking up with me? Today it seemed forever before Mother called me to help her with dinner. When we had it on the table and covered with tea towels to keep the flies away I rang the dinner bell. Actually it was a cowbell that Dad had hung outside with a piece of rope attached. Moments later I saw both Dad and Bud walking towards the house laughing together. First they washed up at the well on their way in. Once inside Dad announced that he had invited a visitor for dinner. “Seems this one is very fond of our Anna.”

Bud blushed. I went weak. Mother nearly jumped to the ceiling as though she was not already fully aware. They had both clearly discussed it. When we had finished our dinner of canned chicken, cold potatoes and homemade bread from yesterday my dad said, “We are about to have a new son added to our family. David has asked me if he could marry our daughter. Being the fine young man he is, I said he could if you agreed.” Poor mother. She did not know what to say. She wanted to say yes, but everything else came tumbling out of her lips. In the end through tears and laughter she loudly announced, “Of Course! I have been waiting to get this out in the open. Now Anna and I can start planning a wedding. Welcome to our family David.” As the young people from church were calling him Bud I began to do the same. It was another week before I saw him again. I was dying to know just what they had discussed. Mostly what did my father say to Bud? It ended with that we would be moving to the Martin farm. We would then be attending a different church as we would now be living about ten miles away. Mr. and Mrs. Martin are no longer well enough to manage the farm. With not having a family they must move to town. Our fathers went with Bud to speak with them as to how they can work out a deal that will be beneficial to all. Bud and I were to be married on my parent’s farm just after seeding time. Fly season should be mostly over. Mosquito season should be manageable too. I would wear my mother’s wedding gown that she had made over from her mother. Plans were taking shape. It appeared to me that my mother had already been doing some planning of her own. She keeps repeating what a nice young man David is. At first I was embarrassed, but now I just smile at her. I must agree. We had little time during the week to be together as Bud needed to work on his new farm. I worked long days helping my mother to can enough for them and us. Before we know it next spring will be here. Now I know why she insisted the garden be much bigger this year. Gosh, I hope I will too be such a wise and alert mother. Always one step ahead of the game my children think they are playing on me. Hmm, I wonder how many children I will have.

Suddenly the autumn leaves were stopping their food-making process due to the changes in the length of daylight as well as the temperatures. The green colour disappeared and the yellow and oranges become visible. Such splendid addition to fall. The children ran around gathering the prettiest leaves to take home to decorate the family home telling their friends they have the found not only the largest leaf, but the prettiest leaf. The beginning of November brought about more changes. We are experiencing thick ground fog at times and misty days. The days and nights are much colder. The wind is more brisk. In some areas there are strong gusts of wind that blows fiercely cutting through to your very soul.

By the end of November leading into December the crisp white snowflakes were beginning to fall. It is a little late this winter. At first the snowflakes fell ever so softly before they began to pile up higher and higher. The main conversations throughout town is always the weather. Will we have snow this winter? If we have snow this winter will it be deep and how long will it last? The children are anxious to build a snowman. Some talk about building a fort. The braver more adventurous ones boast of building the longest tunnel, all the way to the North Pole. That is still an unaccomplished feat. Icicles hang from the eaves on some of the homes near the edge of town. Suddenly Christmas was here. On Christmas Eve Bud asked me to go with him for a buggy ride to see the beautiful sky that was showing off the falling snowflakes. The wind blew them to a slant that hit our faces leaving them pink and tingling. In a while we came to a wider piece of the road. He slowed his team down until they stopped. We sat there snuggled together under a thick warm blanket discussing what next year will be like for us. After a few kisses he pulled a box out of his pocket. “Merry Christmas my darling,” he said as he handed the little square red box to me. I began to shake as I fought back the tears. They were tears of happiness. As I tried to open it Bud began to softly laugh. “Perhaps you should take your mitts off, my dear.” That settled me as I too laughed while I removed them. Inside was a beautiful sparking ring with one diamond in the surrounded by bright red rubies. Not my birthstone, but it was my favourite stone with its sparkling deep rich ruby red. It was that of his mother and my mother. It fit me perfectly. As we rode home in the horse drawn sled the snow began to fall heavier and heavier. We had to hurry as he then had a ten-mile ride by himself. Oh no. I just ed. My mother had suggested that he stay overnight and spend Christmas Day with us. He would then need to leave right after dinner. This will be the way for us too. This will be our last Christmas without having to worry

about milking cows. When spring came Bud and I were married on the farm. Mother was so excited. I felt so proud to wear grandma’s wedding gown. With age it had yellowed slightly. I thought it added to its beautiful charm. Our wedding was small with just our families and a few close neighbours present. Mother and the ladies served a delicious lunch. Congratulations were once again extended as everyone began to leave for home. The cows were in need of milking. It was late by the time we returned to our new home. We quickly got ready for bed as the alarm would be ringing at five. Time to get up and begin our new life together. This was a memory that I frequently found myself visiting. I wanted to keep it close to my heart forever, but now ever so slowly I have new thoughts to think of and cherish. My love for Bud has never dwindled. It is just that life has moved along. In my mind those memories are not always first and foremost.

Now a new prince charming has taken my heart. As much as I tried to be nonchalant concerning my ring when we returned to work, it only lasted until morning coffee time. Nancy was the first to spy it. With a scream she stood up reaching across the table to have a closer look. The three smaller diamonds on each side set the dazzling center diamond sitting on a pedestal off to perfection. Everyone ired my ring saying Congratulations and how beautiful my ring is and of course when will the big day be. Hugs and questions were flying at me. I felt like that of a princess once again. Where is Louis? Why has he not ed us for coffee? I began to wonder. Louis has been busy working on his new home that I will get to share with him. First I must wait for summer weather to come. If the house is not built for this summer we shall wait for the next one. But can I? Gus and Hannah visited us many weekends. Gus said he just had to help his future brother-in-law build his castle. Hannah arrived carrying baked cinnamon buns and the usual fresh bread for lunch. As I worked on Saturdays she looked after feeding the men. Dinner was piping hot and ready to be served when I came home from my busy day at Hibbard’s. Luella said how she was enjoying talking to her Auntie Hannah concerning everything from cake decorating to Frank. While Hannah never gave away any secrets I knew they shared some special thoughts. That was fine with me. I totally trusted Hannah to give some great advice. While I never mentioned it to anyone it seemed strange to me to have the owner of Hibbard’s working on our new home, visiting at my place and eating at my little table. He came as often as possible to lend a hand for his brother Bubba. Esabella, his wife, did not come along as she felt she could be of better help by sending along some cakes and cookies for everyone’s lunch. Tito was impressed. All day at work he was Mr. Moore, but at home he will be Uncle Wade, Bubba’s brother. One day he will be my brother-in-law. I felt it was rushing things a little to have Tito and Luella calling him Uncle, but it was his wish. He said Mr. Moore was too cold so Uncle Wade it was. Whenever Tito could he spent his spare time at our new house. Mansion, he called it. He was not just their gofer. He was their apprentice. Both Gus and Louis did their best to teach him the many lessons of safely using power tools,

measuring and cutting framework. Soon he will learn about electrical and then plumbing. I must say Tito was lapping it all up like a fancy new sponge. Tito still talked about cars. He enjoyed his job, or so he says as a mechanic. Now that he is learning so much about building he no longer is sure just which route he would like to follow. Louis has been encouraging him to not make a set path just yet. It is never harmful to know about more than one thing he would say to Tito. One day Hannah brought this subject up to me. “You know Anna,” she said. “Gus mentioned to me after we were here last time, that Louis speaks to Tito just as though they are father and son. Are you alright with that?” “Yes. I have noticed that but then I wondered if that was wishful thinking on my part. Now that you brought it up, does Gus feel comfortable with it since Bud was very close to him?” “Oh yes, he is fine. There is no problem there. We are both very happy for you and your family. We wish you all much happiness.” I do not know where the months have flown to. One minute it seemed I was getting my first glimpse of a large house plan and now I am walking between the studs picturing the size of each room. The living room with its large window overlooking the wraparound sun deck was going to be my dream for the warm sunny days. A quiet sheltered place to sit and read. Someday grandchildren will run back and forth chasing each other as they squeal with delight. Louis has already put his claim in for two rocking chairs, one for each of us just so we can rock the young ones on the West side to enjoy the evening sun. There will be lots of space for a 2-seat swing as well. Apparently Gus has suggested that these would be great projects for Tito. If that is fine with Louis, it will be good with me. I must to keep my eyes open for a small table to sit between our chairs for our after dinner coffee cups. The catalogues that Louis had given me to choose from were the ones that the buyer for Hibbard’s used. It was the wholesale that Wade felt gave him the best prices for good quality and service. Delivery could sometimes be a little lengthy.

Since Hibbard’s was well known for their quality merchandise, and I worked at Hibbard’s, I was more than happy to make my choices there. To me it still seemed to be a long way off before we would be at the finishing stage. Louis wanted to take a peek at the pictures I had seen in the catalogues for the separate rooms so any little adjustments could be made while in the rough stage. I was more than happy to choose a dream home for us, but I wanted it to meet with his likes as well as mine. He said as soon as I have each room chosen to the finished look we will go over it. Sometimes things are not feasible for every home so changes may need to be made. In my pretty little butterfly book from Louis I began to write catalogue pages for the designated rooms. Any changes from the display that I felt may be more suitable for us and so on. Then I also wrote the colours I had envisioned the rooms to be painted. When I assured him that I had my ideas for each room, it was now his turn to take a peek. “I hope there will be some ideas that you will like too,” I said to him. “Do not look so worried about that my dear. I would live in a granary, but something says you will say no to that. Besides what you do not know about me is that I am colour blind just like an owl. Owls are the only type of birds that are colourblind by the way. A teacher in school told me that when she found out about my blindness. Unfortunately for me she said this during class and so some of the boys began to call me ‘hooty’ for a time. I still get a kick out of it. Those were perhaps the most fun school days for me. Speaking of my school days. This afternoon while I was working away this fellow with a big smile stopped by to say hello. Well, that is nice I thought. Either he is extra friendly or he thinks he knows me. After we spoke for a few minutes mostly regarding framing, he said, “You do not me do you?” “To be truthful no I do not,” I replied. “I gather I should. You will need to fill me in.” By now I was hoping this was worth stopping my work to chat with someone I am not so sure I even know or knew.

“Daniel!” That was all he needed to say. “Where have you been Danny boy?” I asked as we began slapping each other on the shoulder. “The last I of you was when you were hot on the trail of that cute little blonde. I can not her name, but I do that her mother did not like you or your fast noisy car. You sure did like her little girl though and were determined to get some time alone with her. Whatever happened?” “Her name was Sally. Sally Martin. And by the way, I won that battle with the old battleaxe. We got married and are still married today with four young ones.” “Well, congratulations Mr. Turner. How did you manage to win over her mother because I her saying there was no way in hell you would ever get to be with Sweet Sally. Ya, that is what we all called her and she was a sweet young thing,” I stated a little smugly. “So tell me, what are you up to these days?” “The Mrs. and I are farming just south of town. We both enjoy the outdoors. The old battleaxe is now living with us too. I think she really does like me, well a little, now that she is over the idea that I knocked her daughter up. Since the little one never looked like me it was easier for her to warm up to the idea of being a grandma especially when everyone else was fussing over the baby. I sure never wanted the old bat living with us, but there was no one to take care of her since Sally’s daddy ed on. Neither of her sisters would have her as they too have husbands where there is no love lost between them. Just because I do not like her and her antics does not mean I would put her out on the street,” he said in a softer tone. Following a moment of uncomfortable silence he began to speak again. “I hearing that you married but lost your wife some years later. Any family?” asked Daniel. “Yes we had one son now all grown up and planning to marry a very lovely young lady. I too am planning to marry again, but first I need a home for her to live in. She is a widow with two grown children.” After wishing me well, Danny said that he must get what he came after at the local store and head home. A farmer always has chores to do he laughed. That is still so Danny. Some people never change I thought as I smiled to myself.

Taking me by the hand Louis led the way to the sofa with my notebook in hand. “Let us see what you have found. Lots I hope. Now tell me, my dear all about your findings.” And so I began. My first choice was for a sofa set that I just happened to spy. Then I felt we could build around it. Catching my eye was a Victorian style two-piece sofa with a floral chaise lounge in a charcoal colour with paisley black and tan swirls throughout. The wood feet and trimming across the sides and going up the arms were scrolled in a rich chocolate brown. The accent cushions in charcoal set the rich colours off perfectly. The matching two-seat sofa would make the living room comfy and homey. I spied a floor lamp in a light tan colour with a unique shape. The base had the design of a tripod with a lampshade in a matching light colour to let the light shine through. We could order two, one for each sofa. There was even a contrasting easy chair that would set the room off. We will have just the perfect corner for a relaxing chair. Something tells me that Gus will lay claim to it whenever he visits. Before ordering all this furniture we will need to choose cupboards and flooring for the kitchen. To me the most exciting is the pretty stuff rather than the necessary items like flooring. That is the part that I see Louis being excited about. When it came to the kitchen I really did not know just which I should choose. I did find some things that I didn’t like such as dark cupboards and dark walls. I like my light and so does Louis so that shall be an easy choice. So to be sure that I would not forget to mention this I wrote that in my notebook as well. The next evening with Louis looking over my shoulder as he held me tight with one arm around my waist we both agreed we liked the light maple cupboards. There was one displayed that caught our eyes. It was a corner cupboard with a glass see through in each of the two doors. There was a open shelf below to hold I am not just sure what, but am quite certain I will be able to think of something. The darker maple coloured counter tops would set it off. Guess we will be looking for maple table and chairs. At least I would think so. With the cupboards in a light colour they suggested wallpaper accenting in a darker

brown. Louis really likes the built in wall ovens and built in countertop stoves. The stove fan will likely be a dark colour such as black from what I have seen. He said it would be much easier for me to lift things out of the oven. I will be sewing some pretty cafe style curtains in a white with a mixture of burgundy tiny flowers. There is always a bolt or two of that in our inventory at the store. The double stainless steel sink will be a real treat. Many times over the years I have thought how helpful that would be. Lastly I looked up bathrooms. What can they come up with besides pretty towels to make it look attractive, I wondered. A bathroom is the one room that I always thought was for the basics. What can one do with a bathroom? Well, wonder no more. It was not long before I found two bathroom suggestions that would be just right for both of us. Tonight I will see what Louis has to say before I set my heart on them. My favourite was a unique style one large bathroom that was designed to be two in the one room. How creative! The one side for Louis had a shower and a pedestal sink. The two-piece plumbing was in white. To church and to the office he wore a stingy brim fedora in tan. For the summer months he had his favourite tan straw fedora. A hook hung on the wall for a man to hang his hat when he comes home to shower. That would make for a perfect Louis bathroom for this man I have fallen in love with. The window was frosted to give privacy. No curtains needed. One less curtain to wash was my first thought. A mirror was demonstrated hanging on the wall above the sink. There was room for a garbage container under the one side of the sink. A note in my memory bank tells me I will need to check Hibbard’s for a soft scatter rug if we should go with this style bathroom. I still cannot break the habit of watching for specials so as to not have to pay full price even though Louis has assured me I can just choose what I like. While I say thank you to him I can not help but think that is just too wasteful. My side would have a bathtub with beautiful Victorian style feet. Louis had already purchased an oval mirror for me that would look perfect on the wall at the end of the bathtub. I have not as yet seen it but was told it had an attractive frame that I would just love.

There was a space left for bath towels to be hung with a corner sink in the other side. A three-way mirror was above the sink. They had also left space beside the oval mirror for one of those fancy glass shelves. Louis said it was for my pretty things. I can choose the one I like at Hibbard’s. There will be a special at the store for me. Just add any items you wish to it Louis told me. A closet for linens was opposite the bathtub. As we would enter our private bathrooms we could hang antique looking wall paper on each side just like in the picture. We will need to choose a colour and design but no hurry as yet for that. At least I do not think so. “You are right about that Anna, but time does fly. I can tell you made some thoughtful choices. There is nothing in here that I do not like. I especially like the bathrooms. We can make the small bathroom that is near the laundry room suitable to be used by company as well as us when we have just come in from the outdoors,” said Louis as though he was thinking out loud. “That is what I was thinking too.” My choices were sealed with a kiss of approval. Things like wallpaper and towels will be the last items unless I should see something I really like at Hibbard’s that is not a regular stocked item. Louis said I should then just buy it. I just might do that! That would not only surprise Louis but myself as well. Each evening when I went to see how our home was coming along I would not see any big steps taken. I know things like plumbing and wiring do not show so it can seem as though they are working hard with no results, but they both tell me how pleased they are with how much they are accomplishing. Tito mentioned to me how Lu would stop over for a while before coming home from the bakery. Lu said to him that she has adopted the corn broom as her very own, but not forever. “I told her that sweeping floors would help to get rid of a big butt from eating mashed potatoes,” said Tito with a laugh. “Tito! That is rude and uncalled for. I can not believe you would say such a nasty thing.”

“Gee Mom. I was teasing. She is my sister, and no she doesn’t have a big butt, but she is still my sister.” “Tonight I want to hear you apologize to her. I want to hear a sincere apology. You must look at her when you are saying it. Do you understand?” “I am sorry I said that to her. Will I need to hug her too?” “That will depend on how well your apology goes. And do not ever make such a hurtful remark to anyone again. Even if you are just kidding.” “I promise I will not.” “And do not roll your eyes at me. You will never be old enough for that,” I said as I walked into the kitchen hoping for a cup of coffee to have magically appeared. Just when you think they have grown up so much you get a whammy like this. I was sure I had taught him better. I do not like threatening him with his dad, but I am sure Bud would be so disappointed. Bud would sit him down and calmly have a talk with him explaining how comments can hurt someone and so on. Not me, I just lash out at them and get it over with. I was sitting down on my big chair when Luella came home. Tito was hot on her heels. Lucky for him. I had the feeling nothing was going to be said for a while so I thought I would open the conversation as I was beginning to stew. The more I would stew about this the angrier I would get. As a mother I cannot let this go. That little ???? whatever. Before you both reheat the soup on the stove come tell me about your days. “Mine was normal,” said Luella. “So was mine.” stated Tito sheepishly. “Really? That is amazing.” I carefully said in as neutral a tone as I could muster. Now Luella stood there kind of feeling a little frozen as she knew something had happened just not what.

“Well actually,” said Tito, “I was thinking about when I told you, Lu that you needed to use the broom to get rid of a big butt I did not actually mean that I thought your butt is so big or anything like that.” As soon as I cleared my throat she knew he was in trouble, but did not say anything more. Before I could blink he turned taking a look at her backside. “No Lu. You do not have a big butt. Honest. I am sorry if I hurt your feelings.” Just as I thought this was all taken care of she punched him in the arm as she walked away quietly saying,” “Ha Ha you were in trouble.” Some times mothers just can not win.

With not a word being said Louis and I both worked long and hard for our future together. It would not be anything lavish which I do not feel newly married couples should have. It is best for them to begin at the bottom and work their way up. Louis agreed with me, but was happy to tell me how that does no t apply to us at our age. We have both been there and done that. This time it will be more special in a different way. And so the time went from spending our days at our jobs to spending our off time at the new house. It was taking shape rather quickly for the most part. Sometimes it seemed as though they had not done anything. I tried to not feel disappointed because with a second thought I knew there is much to be done behind the scenes such as wiring. Yesterday as Louis and I surveyed our new home he suddenly got the chuckles. Try as he might he could not stop. I saw him take a couple sneak glances at me to see if I noticed. I let it go until I thought he was going to choke on his own laughter. “Alright. So what is so funny?” I asked. “Oh, my dear sweet Anna. This I did not intent to share with you so you must promise you never will let on to Tito or Luella about this. Promise?” “I promise. Now what did you do?” “I was just thinking back to the other day when Tito was helping me at the new house, I asked him to do some measuring for me. I thought it would be a great opportunity for him to learn about cutting corners and stuff. He is always so eager to do something new and different, which is what I really like. After showing him what to do, I left him to try it on his own. If it did not work out it was something that could easily be fixed. When I no longer heard the hum of the saw I thought it must be time to see how your young carpenter is coming. I was so impressed. Right off I felt that he had done a great job, but he was looking at me with a quizzical look on his face. I just had to ask was there something that was concerning him.”

“Well Bubba,” he said. “I do not think this is as good as when you do it. Can it be fixed?” “No need to fix anything Tito. That is as close to being right as dam is to swearing.” All of a sudden I knew I should not have said that. So I suggested that just maybe he not use that expression when you are around. It was one of my mother’s favourites. I find myself frequently using it. Then Tito gets that mischievous look on his face that I knew there was not a chance he would not. That will be one he will keep in the bank for his rainy day. “Well I am sure there will be many more things you will teach him. I am not concerned. I hate to think of all the things his pals have taught him.”

Chapter Nine

This was a friendly town that I loved to walk around just enjoying the sounds of the birds chirping with the distant sounds of children at play. The days were calm. The people were friendly. The children were safe as they played with their friends. The residents enjoyed keeping their places neat and tidy in a simple way. Flowers bloomed here and there during the summer. It had earned the friendly nickname of Peaceful Glade. That it was. When I wanted to unwind from the stresses of the day I just needed to leisurely walk around with my own thoughts to keep me company. Some days I didn’t just what I saw upon returning to my ample suite. Everything that I need and more is here just the way I like it. Warm. Homey. Peaceful.

Today as I strolled around town my mind went over the possibilities of someone falling off the roof one of these days especially when they are all tired. Roof disasters are among some of the most injurious I had heard it said. Not to mention broken bones there can be internal bleeding followed by death. Even when the injuries are minor, the damage may be extensive on the inside. The leading causes of worker deaths on construction sites are falls, followed by electrocution. While I know according to an article I read in the newspaper one day, all the falls from roofs for one-third of all fall related accidents during construction. I try to not dwell on this as I know that both Gus and Louis are very cautious while up so high. But then Louis said he could trip over something and fall too. Then there are those that fall off ladders. This also happens. Mostly there are falls from ten feet or less which can still cause broken bones and head injuries. I doubt that generally it would cause death but still not a pleasant thought. I need to be thinking of more positive things before I am awake all night fretting. When Louis said that anytime they need to do work that is not on the main floor, he would like to see there always being two people there. If anyone should spy something that could be dangerous he asked them to speak up. When Louis told me they always know where the other person is and just what he is working on I felt so much better. Hard to believe that tomorrow is Wednesday again. Seems as though we just had Wednesday. Since Hannah is not able to come along tomorrow I shall make a short stop at the Rascal in hopes of a quick chat with Wanda before I go over to the new house to once again make myself acquainted with Luella’s broom. Between her and I we try to keep the floor swept reasonably clean to not leave room for a potential problem to surface. I woke up bright and early to the dawn of a new day where the air smelled fresh and clean. Even though I was hurrying along I was able to hear the whisper of the wind in the trees. The thought of seeing my friend again brought smiles to my face. The minute I laid my eyes on Wanda I knew there was a problem. Her smiley face was not with her today. She seemed jumpy and on edge. “I am so glad to see you Anna. Have a seat and I shall bring us coffee.” With that

she turned and headed for the coffee station returning with cups and a fresh pot of steaming coffee. “This whole pot is just for us,” she stated trying to make as though she was her happy usual self. I saw different. Knowing Wanda as I do it appeared to me that she was looking and feeling as though the life has been sucked out of her once again. Her face was pale. Her hair had no shine. It looked as though it required some tender loving care. The kind of care she had taken since I first met her. She appeared to be a little unsteady. Her hands had a slight shake in them. She began to talk so much more than is her normal self. I thought she was upset and rattled. The last time I had seen her so down was when Curtis had paid her his visit of terror. After that she required so much to get her old self back again. She had told me that with every communication she has with him she is left feeling as though she has ceased to exist. He loves to play his mind games with her. That is what bullies do. Wanda told me that she does not fit easily into groups so leads a quiet life of her own giving her too much time to think. As soon as she sat down I said, “So what is wrong Wanda? Is it Curtis?” “Yes. I understood he is not to have with me but yesterday I received a letter from him. How does that happen? I wonder just whom he gives it to smuggle out for him. The tone of his letter is just like him, slippery and smug.” “Wanda,” I said placing my hand on her arm. “You must take it to the police station to show them what is still going on. They have to know. I agree with you. He is having a visitor that is just as sick and corrupt as he is. Insist that it must stop. Don’t take no for an answer. You have stood up to Curtis so you can stand up for yourself. The time for you has come. Would you like me to go with you?” “Thank you so much Anna, but this is something I must do for myself. Besides I do not wish to involve you with that life style. Leaning on your shoulder is all I really need. Knowing you are there for me keeps my spirits up. Well, I am trying to keep them up. Just when I am getting on with my life he finds a way to feed my insecurities. I am getting so tired of running and hiding. The more that his past comes to me the worse it is. How could Curtis be two different people with so very different personalities. If they will not help me then I must look out for myself,” said Wanda as she stared at the table.

“What is it you are thinking of doing?” I asked as calmly as I could even though I could feel my knees knocking. The look on her face is beginning to unnerve me. Just what will or could Wanda do? The look I see in her eyes is not one I have seen on her before. There is no sparkle. Her jaw is set tight and straight. I began to feel afraid. There is no doubt that she would never hurt me, but I am now wondering just how far she will go to protect herself and her sons. How big a price is she willing to pay to have peace restored to her life? “Well, Anna. You are such a sweet gentle Christian lady with never a cross word to anyone, you cannot likely even imagine what this is like. But I am at my wits end. I am tired of running. Tired of trying to smooth things over. Tired of pacifying him. No one will stand up to him. Not even the police. Basically he just tells them he is sorry and that he had a bad childhood. Well, you know what? Many people did. Not just him. It is one lie upon the next and they believe him. While they say they will protect me I no longer can believe it. Whose side are they on? To me, it does not appear to be mine.” With that she set her cup down so hard the saucer shook. Were those tears forming in her eyes? Others were looking at us as they tried not to stare. Mr. Cook had come to the thru for a closer look. This is not their caring waitress they have always had I was sure he was thinking. Her voice was trembling just like her hands. She normally is very quiet spoken, but the more she had to say the louder and angrier she became. Not that I can blame her. What will she do? To me that is a bigger fear. Curtis is safe and sound. She cannot hurt him, but can he harm her? We sat for another short while not saying anything both deep in our thoughts. I was wishing I could think of something to say to comfort her. Perhaps a suggestion or two that may be of help for her, but nothing would come to my mind. As though she read my blank mind she said, “Do not feel bad Anna. You help me by letting me unload on your shoulders. There is nothing you can do to help me other than that.” “Now Wanda. Just what are you planning to do? Please do not do anything that will bring more troubles to yourself.” We sat in silence for another while with no answer coming. When I looked at her

I knew she had plans, but was not about to share them with me. I wanted to ask her if she owned a gun, but did not wish to give her any ideas that she may not already have. Then just as though the tide turned she got up from her chair, put a smile on her face and began clearing our table. “Time for me to get to work,” she flatly said and walked towards the kitchen. I remained in my chair for a few more minutes to watch her go about doing her job. Not once did she so much as glance my way. Next Wednesday I must be sure to stop in again. How much can one person take, I wondered? It was not long after I had begun sweeping the floor and at the same time picking up usable nails here and there when Gus walked over to me. “So just what has you trying to beat the life out of that broom? You seem to be swinging that broom with a fury. Who are you mad at?” For a moment I just stood there deciding just how much I could or should say. Finally as I began to feel the tears well up I said “Wanda” as I returned to my sweeping. “What did she do?” he asked as sympathetically as possible. Apparently he had no idea. “It is not what Wanda has done. It is what I am so afraid she may do. Do you know anything about her?” “No I do not. Who is she?” Gus asked. “She is the waitress from the Rascal Rally Diner. She is married to Curtis Allen.” Instantly his face went pale. The steam left him. He was deflated and clearly shaken. “I know of Curtis. He beat a friend of mine to within an inch of his life for no reason other than he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I had heard that he had a family but that is all I ever knew. What is going on?” As quickly and briefly as I could I relayed to Gus just some of what I knew. My biggest fear right now was what has Wanda got planned. Gus left me with the

assurance that he would speak to a friend. He was not about to share anything more with me. Knowing Gus he will not share with me whatever has taken place in earlier times between Curtis and his friend, but it still is obviously close at heart. Gus has a strong hand in the community. He is highly respected for both his wisdom and his demeanour. It is well known that he gives back far more than he takes, and above all you don’t mess with Gus! Before I had the opportunity to speak with Gus once more I had a visitor. Much to my surprise it was Wanda’s boss, Mr. Cook. As we sat at the little table that has come to be called the portable kitchen table in our future home, both of us wearing grim faces I asked, “What is it?” Of course I knew the problem was Wanda. I had planned to visit the Rascal Diner to see just what is happening, but had not done so as yet. It seems time just gets away from me. “As you have probably guessed it is concerning Wanda. She has not shown up since the day following the day you stopped in for coffee. I was hoping you would have some news to share. Good news Anna, I hope.” “Gee, no I do not Mr. Cook.” I tried to look as concerned as I felt inside without saying too much. “Around the time you came in she had been having me worried. I felt sure she was planning something. I tried to reach out to her, but she is so private, and for good reason, I knew she would not reveal anything,” Mr. Cook went on to say. After we sat quietly each in our own thoughts for a few minutes, Mr. Cook asked me if I knew Curtis’s brothers at all?” “No I do not. All I know is she has two sons living in the City of Chilliwack. They are her sons are they not?” “Yes they are, and for some reason they do not seem to be any too eager to visit their mother. For this reason she tends to fight off Curtis and his brothers on her own. It is difficult for children to have to take sides no matter how bad they know a parent is or how old they are.” As I looked at him I noticed his face had turned to fright, not concern. “You must

value her presence at the Rascal highly. Most owners would just tell them to not return again. What is it that draws you closer?” I asked. Just as I was about to say earth to Mr. Cook he turned back towards me. I knew this was more than difficult for him. Finally he said, “She reminds me so much of my sister Sally. I hurt so much for her.” Wow! Did that take the wind out of my sails. Then I just knew I had to say it. “Is Wanda your sister or your daughter? Your secret will be safe with me.” But which one I now wondered. After a long silence, “Yes,” he said in a quivering voice. With that he covered his face in both hands leaning his elbows on the table. I was shocked. I had absolutely no idea. No wonder he is so forgiving of her. How will I ask the question that I really need to know. Which one? I could not keep myself from sharing with this upset man. “I had the feeling when I last saw Wanda that she may be up to something that would be more than she should get into by herself. She did not exactly say she would or would not so thinking it may not be any of my business I never pushed it. I did caution her to be careful of her actions. I cannot imagine just what I would do as I have not been anywhere near walking in her shoes,” I said in a whisper. Tears were now filling my eyes. They were ready to overflow into a steady stream rolling down my face. After a few more tense minutes Mr. Cook said, “I did something I promised Wanda I would never do.” “What is that?” I asked cautiously. Do I really wish to know? It is too late now. My words have been spoken. “Wanda made me promise that I would never visit Curtis when he is in jail which has been a few times. She is afraid that he will find a way to go after me. If he does away with me she will have no one left to take care of her. I keep her wages low so that scumbag thinks that is all she has. Her sons think that too. They do not help her, but I do not think they would take advantage either. I make it up to Wanda by paying her rent and utilities always doing it with cash so there is no trace. I am always upfront on my income tax, but hopefully they shall never get to see that.”

I sat there not knowing what to think or say. Finally I asked the question I knew I just had to know. “Where do his brothers live and what are their names?” “The dirtbags live in Squamish. Not near far enough away to suit me. They do not like me either because I take care of my little sister. They are both lazy and sleazy. They would steal from their own mother in fact I am sure they did when they were in high school. They barely have one conscience between the two of them. They are two scruffy filthy looking bums. I would love to rub their noses in the spit they spew onto the ground for others to walk in. Up until now I was careful not to visit Curtis in jail for fear he would have buddies there that could describe me for his hit men. I am pretty sure Curtis would not have the guts to kill anyone himself. With that type of people the favours go back and forth.” Mr. Cook sat for a few more minutes preoccupied with his thoughts. I am sure he was wondering just how much more should he share with me, but his heart was becoming heavier by the moment. I patted his arm for a moment. In a weak whisper I asked, “Did you say she is your sister?” That was just a wild guess on my part. “Yes, Wanda is my little sister. She was the accident that was bound to happen one day. My father loved to drink just like our brothers. That is why I never touch the stuff. I learned a long time ago just how bad that stuff is. How it can drag you down and down until you can no longer get up. “As much as I hate to call him my father it is what he is or was. He would wake in the morning all hung over promising mother that tomorrow he would do better. He always sweet-talked her into believing he truly was sorry, but for some reason she always forgave him. It seemed to be the way in those days. But then what other choice did wives have? With children to care for and no money they had to stay hoping that tomorrow may be a better day. “The next time he came home drunk ready for a fight she managed to get outside to hide in the bushes. Later that night when he was ed out in bed she emptied every bottle of booze she could find breaking the bottles as she finished. Fearing he may take one to her she hid them outside in the bush waiting for him to go to work so she could take them someplace further away. “Later Mother told me she just could not take it anymore. If he killed her in the

process that would be fine too, but the abuse will have stopped. “Eventually morning came. In a stupor he stumbled around looking for his medicine bottle as he called it when suddenly he grabbed mother by the hair pushing her to the floor where he proceeded to beat her. It was not until a neighbour found her and took her to the hospital that she found she was pregnant once again. The good part of it was she got her baby girl. She named her Sally. “That night after the doctor left my dad let into her again in another fit of rage. This one was worse than the last. ‘How many times have I told you not to get pregnant? Huh? I can not keep feeding more and more mouths. Do you hear?’ This time he yelled so loud the neighbour could hear him while in her yard. Fearing for Mother’s safety she reported it to the police. The kindest thing she could have done. This was to be my father’s last stint in jail. “While he was spending this short time in jail someone did not take kindly to wife beaters. Our brothers then began to take over for him. They were determined to be just as ruthless as their father that they ired. Since I had already left home I did not know any of this was taking place until one day when I stopped in to visit her while I was sure her and Sally were the only ones home, the neighbour stopped me as I drove past her place. “ ‘Please,’ she begged. ‘I need to speak with you. I am so afraid for your mother and Sally. One day she asked me for a box. Not knowing what she wanted it for, but thinking she wished to use it for a drawer I gave her an apple box telling her there was no need to return it. If she needed another box in a couple weeks I could give her another one. Still I did not think anything of it,’ Mother’s neighbour said. “ ‘Then a week ago our calf Betsy managed to get out. When I saw her at your mother’s place I went over to fetch her,’ she continued. ‘While there I heard the wee sound of a baby cooing. I knew it was Sally. I knew that your mother was desperate. Never would she leave any of her babies outside in a box.’ “All I could say was, ‘Thank you for telling me. If there is anything else please get word to me.’ I kissed her on the check and left. This was little pay for saving my own mother and baby sister.

“That night I waited for those two rotten scoundrels to return home in their inebriated state. There was no doubt in my mind what they would be up to. I had taken Sally to the neighbour. With a long thick stick in my hand I sat waiting for them to cross that doorway. They did, with their filthy mouths lashing out at a sweet lady. Our mother. “I had the back door propped shut so they could not enter there. They had to come to the front door clearly seen by the neighbour. “Due to my jobs on the farm slinging hay I had built up some muscles. I maintained my strength just in case one day one of them planned to take a swing at me. This day could be the day, I thought. “While I witnessed their abuse I was biting my tongue so they could not say they never did anything wrong. That was their customary song. Today it will not work. “As soon as I had seen more than enough I turned the kitchen light on, my signal for the police to be called by Mother’s neighbour. “Soon they came quietly letting no one know they were there. The two large officers just walked in taking in the scene for a couple minutes before they were noticed. They were my witnesses. Mother’s Calvary had arrived. “Sally grew up to be a sweet smart young lady. I talked to her many times about sticking up for herself. But those two had beaten all the confidence out of her. With strict Court orders they were to stay away from her or it would be jail time. They moved away. Not far enough though. “She needed to take on a new identity. I had never said anything to any of my staff or customers that I had a little sister. Perhaps this way she could return to town. I wanted her near me so I could take care of her. I loved her dearly. “She had her hair cut short, changed the style of clothes to dresses that she had never liked wearing. Most of all she took on the name of Wanda. She would from then on be Wanda MacCaa, an orphan. “With her sweet quiet manner everyone in town soon fell in love with her, and

she with them. It just happened that I was in need of a waitress. Wanda did in no way resemble me. Much to my dismay I looked like my father. “Wanda was her mother’s daughter in every way. Small boned, bright blue eyes with a tiny waistline. I had always been told I was built like a farm tractor, sturdy with broad shoulders. She calls me Mr. Cook insisting it will not raise any anticipations. So far she is right.” “I must ask. Wanda has said she visits her sons. Does she really and are they nice to her?” “Yes she does. They are both quiet mellow young men that keep to themselves. Never searching for trouble. They both have jobs but do not associate with others if they can help it. They try to stay away from their father’s eye.” Suddenly Mr Cook got up. Looking at no one with that look in his eye that said he had had enough. “There is more than one way to skin a cat!” With that he turned on his heel walking out into the dark. No matter what I tried to do to keep myself busy after Mr. Cook left, I just could not take my mind off this heavy subject. Where is she? I cannot just sit here in my comfortable house worrying. That will not help to locate her. I must think of something. Like what? I do not have the brave inquisitive heart of a detective. Three days later and I still could not think of anything useful to do I decided to check out her place. After one peek through the kitchen window I found myself gasping. It looked as though it had been ransacked once again. Worse than the last. I carefully took a better picture with my minds eye to report to Mr. Cook. Once more Wednesday came around. The birds were chirping, dogs were laying on the lawns too lazy to move, the slight breeze that had been blowing lately seemed to have run out of steam. I began to listen in on other people’s conversations both in and out of Hibbard’s. I knew that was forbidden in the store, but I needed to do it. I felt there was someone out there that knew something that would help find Wanda. All of a sudden as I walked home from church on a mild sunny day something struck me. Father had looked at me with a strange look in his eyes a couple Sundays ago. Is he hiding her?

Please God let it be true. She would be safe. Now the question is, how do I go about finding out. I cannot just straight out ask him. Or can I? I will bid my time, if it does not take too long. As I walked home I felt that already summer was giving way to an early fall. The days were more brisk. The sun was losing its warmth. With the exception of the odd day it has begun time to add a sweater to my daywear and a jacket in the evenings. Much too often we are seeing dark inky blue skies. Louis suggested that we visit with the Bakers’ as we have not seen them for a while. I suggested that one mild evening when Louis wishes to take a little time off from building we walk over to their place. Perhaps they may be home. A couple days later Louis said to me that we should make it a short day. Let us go for that walk he said. As usual the town was peaceful. Not much happening. The Baker’s home was as tidy and peaceful as the rest of the neighbourhood so we knocked on the door. In a moment Arnold was at the door welcoming us into their home Lily was in the kitchen but called a warm hello to us. “If Arnold does not say how happy we are to see you both we are. We have been thinking of you. Now sit down and I will bring in some cups. I have just put the coffee pot on for our evening treat. So cookies and coffee it is tonight.” Before I could say to not go to any trouble she was in the front room carrying a tray fixed with cream, sugar, small spoons, cups and sweet smelling sugar cookies. I do not know what Arnold heard that neither of us did, but he suddenly jumped up to return with four cups of freshly brewed strong coffee teetering precariously on a silver tray just as though Lily had called him. We were just about to say that it was time for us to go home when there was a loud banging on the front door. Someone was hollering, “Arnold, Arnold! There is a fire! Come quick!” Only Arnold could understand this unusual gibberish, but it was his house. We all rushed to the door to see who it was and where the fire is. Thinking it was here we looked around for some flames. There was nothing.

The young fellow, about twenty years of age began to say to Louis something. He was shaking so and out of breath we could not understand what he was saying. I did not know that this was Blake. Lily had spoken of him one other time. He is the energetic friendly man that helps out his neighbours mowing lawns in the summer and shovelling snow in the winter. He never asks for anything, but he is gratefully given some spending money for his kindness. Blake is not one to take anything. The townspeople just insist. All of a sudden Louis said, “My house that I am building?” Shaking his head up and down with huge terrified eyes he pointed to the fire. As we all ran down the streets we soon saw the flames crackling in the air as they tried to reach the sky. By the time we arrived the town fire truck was there with only two men. Before I could ask where the rest were, men came running from every which where. Some carrying buckets while others had hoses to hook up to the neighbours taps. Before the truck had come to a stop Louis was climbing onto it to take down the ladder. It appeared to me that there were men and women coming out of the woodwork to help us. In a matter of minutes the fire was extinguished. While it did leave its mark Louis felt so grateful that the damage was small and could easily and quickly be repaired. It appeared to the firemen that the fire had started in the spare bedroom on the main floor. It had burned a large black hole in the expensive hard wood. There were singe marks from the heat in the master bedroom as well. The little girls in the neighbourhood like to play house in that bedroom when we were not there, but as Louis said they would not have had matches. They were not our only visitors apparently. The flames we were able to see on our way over were from the wrap around sundeck. Another few minutes and the walls would have ignited. Who knows where it would have stopped. Now I wondered just how much damage has been done by water and smoke. How far will this set back our occupancy date? We hoped to be settled before Christmas.

That meant that we needed to be married before we moved in. Louis kept saying how he thought a winter white wedding would be lovely. He has been speaking of us going on a sleigh ride through town leading us into the pretty country where the fences will be dusted in white. He speaks of a red sleigh pulled by two black Fresian horses. I have seen this team with a sleigh behind during the winter months since we have been here. We had spoken of Christmas in our new home this year with one large family before any of them would possibly be moving away. We would have a turkey big enough for all to take some home with them for a sandwich the next day. There would be dressing, that I would make, mashed potatoes, vegetables and red and green jello topped with creamy white Dream Whip. Tito’s favourite. Later in the evening we would all have a dish of Christmas pudding that had been warming as we went for a sleigh ride. It will be dusted in powdered sugar in Rum sauce with a squirt of whipped cream on the side. This year was to be no exception. One present for each but lots of food. A large wooden bowl that Tito had made in school during his woodworking class filled with a variety of nuts still in their shells sat in the center of the coffee table. Always an extra side dish of peanuts with the shells still on sat next to it. Louis said they had their peanuts warmed in the oven which he promised he would show me how. I do not think I will ever be able to master it. Somehow it just may require his special touch to make them just right. Both Luella and I tried to not say anything about the fire as we knew Louis already had a lot on his mind besides our disappointment. For now it is first things first. Louis needs to take care of his fire issues to be sure we will be moving in there before Christmas. We will not be married until that is determined. The following day Louis said that Vance and Stella would be visiting us on Sunday. Vance will help his dad while Stella has some things to show me. With their church service being earlier than ours, they will arrive about the time we get home. I wonder just what she wishes to show me. Vance dropped Stella off at my door before heading to our new home. Judging by the way she was bouncing around that large box she was carrying, I thought it must be filled with light items. I wonder if her veil is in there.

Much to my surprise that is what filled this pretty box. She asked me if I could attach it to the lovely headpiece that sat nestled in amongst the veil. She had chosen a two tier Fingertip Bridal Veil with a scalloped edge. The soft sparkly white was a perfect match for her dress. There were dozens of tiny pearls and sparkling sequins embellishing her specially chosen headpiece. After carefully fitting it on her head I tried a couple different ideas as to how it would look the most attractive. Also I needed to hear her gasp to know the one that was truly her favourite. Following our third try I heard it, loud and clear. Her big smile said it all. This was how it was to be, unique and dainty. As I hand sewed she began to share her memories from yesteryear and recent of her cousin and good friend Sally. I soon realized she was not aware that Sally had once again disappeared. Her voice quivered as she spoke. Soon little droplets of sweet memories of tears dripped down onto her pink cheeks. I quietly excused myself to make us a cup of warm sweet tea to settle Stella’s nerves. By the time I returned she had gotten herself poised and ready to continue. It suddenly struck me that Stella does not know about Sally’s name change to Wanda. Now I need to to not refer to her by her name lest I slip up, and I must to tell Louis, Tito and Luella to be careful of it too. “Anytime in the past that Curtis was not able, due to being behind bars, to inflict his power on Sally his two nasty brothers were there to step in. I am not sure who was the nastiest, Henry or Leroy. It seemed to me that each had their own set of terrifying ideas. Neither one is exactly smart. “While I am not a gambler, I would bet that in this case it is Leroy who has the upper hand. He would be calling the shots as it always seemed to me that he disliked Sally the most. “Sally is a scrapper. She will not go down quietly and they both know it. She will kick, bite, pull their hair or anything else she can manage to defend herself. My feeling is that they would like to have raped her when she was a teenager but quick thinking Sally was one step ahead. It was as though she slept with one eye and one ear open.

“If she has been gone this long she is in trouble,” Stella continued. “I am surprised that brother Cook has not had his bloodhounds out looking for her. If he finds Sally and one hair on her head has been hurt by these two, brother Cook will settle this issue once and for all just like he promised them he would a couple years ago.” “I did not know that there had been words between them before,” I said. “Oh yes. Brother Cook has told them he is no longer putting up with their shenanigans especially when it is at the expense of his sister. If you two do not wish to have your backsides whipped and then hung up by your bootstraps then stay away. And do not think I can not do it single-handedly,” he told them in no uncertain . They knew without a doubt he meant business. They were not about to test him. On a lighter note I was going to tell you a funny little story about our mothers. While Sally and I were teenagers we both wanted a puppy. A lot! We decided that if we both begged our mothers we would just maybe get one. And so the begging began. We made all kinds of promises as to how we would look after them. Most of which we kept. There was a neighbour that had a medium brown poodle. She was quiet and friendly with a litter of pups that was in need of a home. Perfect we both thought. It was agreed after dinner we would both approach our parents. We could hardly believe it. Neither one flatly said no. We could look into it they said. My dad was the first to say that mother and I should visit her, but if they were too expensive then the answer would have to be no. The following day I came home from school to find we had a new member to our family. Goldilocks! She did not look anything like gold. She had very light brown short curly hair with a white patch on her chest. She always looked at you with an inquisitive look as she tilted her head to the side. “What made you choose her above the rest?” I asked my mother. “That is what the lady asked me. Like I told her if she should shed a little she would match the carpet. I do not like dog hair everywhere as you know, but you have been asking for a dog for so long Stella I thought it was time. Her hair will not show and you are old enough to look after her. I suspect she is a mixed breed

which would be just fine with your father and I.” “What can you tell me about Poodles?” My mother then asked the lady. “For starters they truly do not shed. They are intelligent, and easy to train. They are great family dogs. Mixed breed dogs are not as strong willed. I am sure with soft gentle care she will be a great dog for your family,” the lady concluded. “By now Goldilocks had won my heart. I had to bring her home. Now it is time for you to make this her home feed her and house train her. This will be up to you Stella as well as your other chores.” my mother instructed me. “I was so happy. I could not wait for Sally to visit. I thought I really should take her for a walk after dinner to show her off. That evening I had the supper dishes washed, dried and put away in record time. I willingly cleaned the kitchen to a shine for this adorable gift. Then I put the tiny leather collar around her and set off for Sally’s house. When Sally opened the door there in her arms was a cute cuddly chocolate brown floppy eared dog that looked so much like Goldilocks I could not believe my eyes. They both got excited at seeing each other. They were squirming and yelping to get down. It was clear they knew each other. “Her name is Coco!” exclaimed Sally as she grinned from ear to ear. “Let’s take them out on the grass before they both wet the floor. I also want us to share our puppy stories,” said my elated cousin Sally. As we sat on the grass watching them play together Sally told me the story of their family getting this adorable puppy. It was the same version my mother had given me of it. While Sally’s father was very sick he always thought of family especially Sally which we were all aware of. As our mothers talked of this while we were at school they both felt this would be good companions for us. From the same litter would be a good bond for two little puppies. That certainly helped for them to be on our side. While my mother was settling on the little blond puppy, her mother chose a dark teddy bear puppy in a chocolate brown with curly hair and a white patch on her

forehead. This little puppy seemed to be the odd one in the litter drawing her to the unusual colour in the litter even more. Sally had immediately named her Coco for some reason. Perhaps because she likes hot coco so much. Instead of us sitting on the grass with our dolls we now rush home from school so we could sit together with our adorable and funny puppies. They soon grew more playful with each other. They chased each other around on the grass tumbling over their own feet as well as each other. We worked together to train them. No house messes or chewing up shoes were allowed. Her mother donated an old pair of brown leather low-heeled shoes that were worn out so she never wore them. In Coco shoe we laced in a black thick lace from a man’s work boot. It was hard to do but we managed even though we had to use a pair of pliers to pull it through. When the neighbour lady came over to see what we were doing, she said her husband has a pair of thick brown laces we could have for Goldilocks. As they grew they shared their chewy toys, their food dishes and their water bowls. They ate and drank at the same time. They were happy to nap on the same towel no matter which house they were at. We both loved our puppies as they grew. We trained them to lay closely with a paw over the other. They truly loved each other. Never was there any fighting. As they matured we took them for walks going a little further as they grew stronger and bigger. They went everywhere with us except to church and school. When I marry Vance Goldilocks will remain with my parents. She is now too old to move just like my parents. Her days are spent lying on her towel in the sunbeam as it shines through the kitchen window. Coco died a few years ago after she suffered injuries from a kick by one of the neighbourhood boys. Ezra was a troublesome lad. He was always angry. His vindictive life seemed to be filled with disdain and hatred. He wore a constant smirk on his face that many a man wanted to remove, but knew it was likely not all his fault. Usually you can begin with the father they said, but who really knows. The two grocery stores in the area have been harassed along with items stolen as the small group of troublesome youth were in the store. One person cannot

manage them all alone. It has been reported but nothing can be done until they are caught in the act. This particular day the boys had been walking through the community swearing in loud voices as they tried their best to cause a disturbance. They seemed to love a confrontation. Coco was lying on a warm carpet of grass enjoying her lazy day in the sun when Ezra walked over and kicked her sending her flying to which his buddies thought it was funny. Of course they all said that was not what had happened at all. They claimed Coco had charged Ezra eager to bite him. Ezra was afraid. Well, so he said. Their fathers stormed into the Police Station defending their sons. It was quick to see where their vulgar language and behaviour came from. While trying to emphasize the nature of their deploring act, they had no other choice but to let them go knowing they would soon be in this office again. Needless to say Sally was devastated. Then at school they taunted her with unkind remarks. One day when she no longer could take the harassment she quickly turned around landing a strong punch square in the middle of Ezra’s nose. While his broken nose bled profusely he ran into the nearest shop for help. Officer Hill was in the store at the time buying himself a cool drink of Pepsi. He insisted on giving the three of them a ride home. This was their final warning. Next time it would be the local detention center for boys. The officer said he did not need to witness the attack to know it had been provoked by three obnoxious youth. A charge of cruelty to animals will also be on their records. Should this puppy die from her injuries charges will be laid. Suddenly no one had anything to say. No one knew who had placed the kick except Officer Hill. This was his silent defence should he need one in the future. While I was glad Stella shared this sad story with me, our chatter had now gone from cheerful to sullen. It was also a challenge to keep straight if she was referring to Wanda or someone I did not know. I felt so bad for Wanda or Sally as Stella called her. Stella too as they were so close. Poor Goldilocks seemed to have lost her desire for playfulness. Not only was her playmate gone but also her only sibling. Goldilocks no longer had a furry family. Every time I think of Wanda and her name change I feel so sad that she has had

to leave one life behind just to protect herself. I certainly do not wish to be the person to give her away where she will promptly fall into harm. Each night as I say my prayers asking for Wanda to be returned safely I shall give thanks for my simple peaceful life that has always been full of love and attentiveness.

We were just gathering up the remnants when Louis and Vance appeared. Vance was now eager to head for home as he had to work the next day and it already was showing signs of darkness outside. Soon the sky would be a dark blue with rain clouds cluttering it up. Tomorrow I shall need to wear my raincoat and carry an umbrella when I walk to the bus stop. It is not that cold, but when I get wet it is then I feel the cold going through my bones. As soon as we waved goodbye to them Louis asked me if there was any news on Wanda’s whereabouts. Neither of us had news to share. Louis suggested that on Wednesday I visit the diner being sure to speak with Mr. Cook privately. Perhaps you could ask if this is a normal length of time for her to be gone, he suggested. Maybe this is normal. I could not imagine that, but some families are different. “Did Stella mention to you that Sally is to be in their wedding party?” “Who? No she has never mentioned anything about who all they have asked to stand up with them. I never even thought of it.” By the time Wednesday rolled around I was more than anxious to get to the diner. I accidentally arrived just at a perfect time. The morning rush had just quieted down. The kitchen was just being sorted before they prepared for the lunch crowd. As I walked up to the kitchen Mr. Cook was looking at something on the counter. Normally he is fully away of anyone and anything coming near, but today he never so much as noticed me. It was as though he once again was in his own world. A dark world far away. One filled with worry. “No Anna, I have not heard anything. I am sorry,” he said turning away. Clearly he did not wish to speak of Wanda. I could tell his heart was broken. His head was full of dread. I am sure he thinks of all the worst that could happen.

Four months later . . .

Louis and I were married two months ago without my friend Wanda there to celebrate with me. I was so afraid that she would never be found. Louis had to agree with me. Wade and Hannah were our only witnesses. Gus walked me down the isle. Tito was there beside me for the day to be sure my needs were all met. He drove me and then Louis and I around in his car that he had polished to a shine. The day was sunny and warm. Perfect for a convertible ride to enjoy this beautiful warm fresh day . . . There were so many people there it was amazing, but there was still that hole. We chose a Wednesday so most shops would be closed. I am sure everyone for miles around attended. I had no idea the Moores’ were so well known and ired. I am sure it will be weeks before we get all the presents opened. Then there are the thank you cards to be sent. Louis assured me he would be there to address the envelopes. Vance, Stella and Luella were constantly offering their help. From the eager comments from some of the older ladies I highly suspect I shall have enough teacups and saucers for the whole town. The food for the lunch was brought by the guests. There was everything from potato salad to jellied salads to sandwiches. The town bakery donated a gorgeous tiered wedding cake. Cakes and cookies had arrived from I do not know where. After everyone had left to mingle as they slowly made their way home, a beautiful gray horse was hooked to a sparkling white cart. Louis and I were going for a ride. Two young teenage girls from the store rode on the back of the cart with a couple of large boxes between them. Louis knew just where to go. We drove all over town stopping in front of homes where Louis knew there were people that had not attended. Inside each little package was a small piece of wedding cake with a sample of our lunch. The bells on the horses rang letting everyone know we were there. We waved and thanked them all for their good wishes. After returning the girls to their homes we went for a quiet slow drive around the country fields. It was so peaceful and beautiful. A perfect ending to a long exciting day. As we neared our new home I could not help but think of this friendly town that I was a little leery of at first. I thought it was a strange town. But as I grew to know it I fell in love with the friendly people lock, stock, and barrel. What better place could there be to live?

A couple weeks later Lily and Arnold Baker accepted our dinner invitation. While Louis and Arnold sat outside discussing man stuff, Lily and I cleaned up the kitchen before settling into a comfy chair in the room with the magnificent view to enjoy our cup of tea. We loved to share stories from our past. Our life before we came to North America. Gee Anna, I wish you could have met my teenage friend Maria. I had so many fun times with her even though neither of us had spending money. We just got by on what we had from doing chores here and there in the neighbourhood. Most of our fun times were spent walking around talking about boys. We would get dressed in our best school clothes as though this was somewhere special, but we never knew who might see us. I have told her of the fun times we have together wishing she could have met you too. She has the cutest laugh. When she laughs I can not help but start laughing too. “Oh Anna,” said Lily. “I must tell you about the time the two of us went to Seattle by ourselves. I could not stop laughing.” Wish I could have some daring times to look back on, but for me there was always farm work I thought to myself. “Well, it was for my 16th birthday present from my parents. My driver’s licence. In mid fall my parents were going to go South to visit a friend. I convinced them that Maria and I should go to the Penny’s store in Seattle. Just a day trip. I really did need a new winter coat. “I could try them on. Choose one. Then ask the clerk to hold it for me. My mother will pick it up next week. My story was set. “Maria’s mother gave the green light for her to go along with me, but she was to know she would not have any spending money. As for her father, he regularly came home from work drunk. He was too happy to have Maria out of the house. I do not even think he comprehended just where we were going. “We would go on Tuesday when the highway was not so busy. As soon as he left for work Maria left for my house. Minutes later we were on our way full of confidence and excitement. “Just before we arrived in the small town of Everett there was a loud bang. The

car swerved taking a sudden pull to the center of the road. I hung on to the steering wheel for all I was worth. “With no experience or wisdom I put my foot on the brake quickly realizing I was making matters worse. In my terrified state I took both feet off and froze. My hands had a death grip on the wheel, but I was not strong enough to override its strong pull. Somehow we eventually came to a stop in the rough median. Now there were cars going both directions beside us. Somehow we had managed to not hit anyone else. “After our hearts began to beat a little slower and the smoke had somewhat dissipated we got out ever so deftly. Even for me it was quick to see the problem. As I looked back on the highway I saw pieces of rubber lying across the Interstate in bits and pieces waiting to hinder other drivers. I held my breath as a few cars slowly wove their way through the obstruction we had created. “Now what were we to do? We did not know where the spare tire was much less how to put it on. As we stood there for a couple minutes wondering just what we should do a friendly trucker pulled over.” “So ladies. Are you two responsible for all these road gators I see on the highway?” Judging by his big smile we knew he was not angry, just friendly. Trying to sound grown up and worldly Maria said in her sweet innocent voice, “What gators?” I was too scared to speak. Trying his best to not laugh he said in his heavy voice, “That is what we truckers call all the pieces of rubber that are laying on the road in bits and pieces from a blow out. Are either of you hurt?” After we assured him we were not, just a little frightened he introduced himself to us as Noah. When we both just stood there not knowing what we were supposed to say he asked. “And what are your names and why are you out here all by yourselves without your daddy to care for you?” After a short get acquainted few minutes Noah assured us we need not worry. He would change the tire and in minutes we will be on our way. He was right. Before we knew it Noah had put the spare on. Got out his pump and added a little more air. Noah also told us about tires while he worked. Apparently when they are just riding along in the trunk they do tend to get a little flat, but not to

worry he would take care of it for us. Before leaving us he handed us a ten-dollar bill just for good measure. Somehow he seemed to sense that we each had less than two dollars for the day. We just might need something hot to warm us up for our return trip. In the meantime we should be on our way so we get home before it gets late and the owls come out to hoot. Of course we thanked him many times over. Climbing back into our old car we still felt a little shook up as we began to get on our way. I had a coat to buy! “So Lily. Share with me one more adventure. You know how we always shared with each other,” I said as I tried to nudge her on. I was afraid that before she would spill the beans something would come along and I would never get to hear another story. Besides I am so happy to hear that she too had a good friend while living in her strange new home. We had both cried so hard when we had to part thinking there will never be anyone to be special friends with. A friend to share our fun times, our sorrows and our struggles. “Well, my other close friend June and I would sleep over at each others’ place about once a month. Actually, her name is Juniper just like the shrub, but if anyone calls her that she will punch them in the nose. I do not blame her. Why would anyone name their baby after a shrub? “We generally spent our chatting time thinking of fun things we could do. Basically things that we should not have been doing. “This one time June asked me if I wanted to go with her to her Aunt and Uncles place because they had a couple apple trees and had said to June’s mother they could come and get some. Summer holidays were coming up quickly so why not if her and I took her dad’s car and went for apples. We could easily pick all we would need and still return before dark. It was not that many miles away. It was just on the north edge of Lynnwood. Our edge. “After assuring June’s parents that it was all right with my parents if I went with her we began putting our plan together. I was to take a box with me so I could bring apples home for my family as well. Great idea I thought. My mother was so pleased they were making this generous offer. And yes Mother, I will tell them thank you. Unless I forget I thought.

“So early in the morning as the sun rose beginning its assent in the clear sky we set off in her dad’s car. It was not long before I began to wonder by the sounds of it just how safe this vehicle is. Already I had second thoughts as to what my dad would say if he could hear it. It really was a rattletrap. Would it take us all the way there and then home again? I sure did hope so, but was not extra confident. Feeling there was nothing to worry about I decided I would just enjoy this oneday adventure. “June’s mother had packed some sandwiches and cookies for us to enjoy on the way. Auntie Z (I have no idea what that stands for) would give us snacks for the ride home. Soon June once again assured me there was nothing to worry about. I just smiled in compliance. “Her dad had assured us we could not get lost as long as we stayed on the main road for about two and a half hours. Then we would see a red barn on our right hand side. The road turning right was just past the barn. We could not miss it. “It was a gravel road barely two lanes wide with an abundance of wild fox tails growing as they happily waved their fuzzy heads in the mellow breeze. Here and there we could see the bright yellow heads of the wild dandelions as though they brought a ray of sunshine to those ing by. The blue Creeping Myrtle here and there added a striking beauty to the wild sea of blooms. Nature’s perfect picture was completed with a fresh scent that brought a clean fresh air to our senses. I wanted to drive on this pretty road forever. “Before June had turned the motor off a plump smiling lady was stepping out the door with her arms stretched out ready for hugs. This had to be Auntie Z. I would have recognized her anywhere. She was everything I imagined. She looked and smelled divine. “Her hair was tied back from her wrinkled forehead with a narrow piece of red and white fabric. It was tied in a knot above her left temple with the ends standing out. Her salt and pepper curly hair was like a mass of springs in every direction. “She wore a large flowered dress in bright colours with a pale yellow apron over top. This she had tied in a large bow at the back. Setting her attire off was a pair of black well-worn gumboots. I could immediately see why she was called Auntie Z. There was no name that would possibly suit her better. She was

everything perfect there was in between. Already I was wishing she were my Auntie Z. “Her first words came tumbling out in one big jumble. Auntie Z hugged and kissed me along with June as though I already had a special spot in her heart that I am sure was as large as the sky above. “Before I knew it we were seated in her cozy kitchen with a tall glass of cold chocolate milk and a large plate of apple cake with toasty sugar crumbs on top. Now to eat these delicious morsels and not make a mess everywhere. “As though June read my mind, she said ‘Do not worry about the crumbs. I get crumbs everywhere. We can clean them up before we go outside.’ “ ‘That is right,’ said Auntie Z. ‘Anything that is good to eat needs to be crumbly or sticky. Now you girls eat up. Finish this cake before you go outside to pick apples or you will need to take it home with you. I will be out there myself cleaning up the mess that Mr. Wind makes with my lovely fruit trees. If he is not careful I will take my rake to him,’ she laughed. “I had never been this close to a fruit tree before much less this many different kinds of trees. There were other fruit trees there too besides the three apple trees. I wondered just how many she has. To me it looks like she is living the end of her life in fruit tree heaven. Later I was to learn that there was an apricot, a peach, a cherry and a pear tree. Everything that Auntie Z loved. How she has managed to take care of so many trees was a wonder to me. “Soon the boxes were filled with bright red apples, plump and juicy. We loaded them in the car before searching for Auntie Z to say goodbye. “It was only a moment before she came hurrying towards us wearing her huge loving smile. She handed June a box filled with sandwiches and cookies and what not all else. It smelled so good. Sure enough the remainder of the apple cake was there too. “As we said our goodbyes I felt as though I had just been wrapped in the warmest hug. A hug like that of a soft winter comforter. “We had barely been chugging along for an hour when we heard like a big puff coming from under the hood. Smoke soon billowed out. June gave me a smile

filled with her sweet laugh as she told me not to worry. She has done this before. June clearly was not worried, but I made up for her share. “June reached under the seat to remove an old grimy towel. ‘Come on,’ she said. So out I climbed following her to the front of the car. She knew exactly how to lift the hood to let the smoke out. As it billowed up to the sky as though it was going to hide behind the fluffy clouds, June fanned them away with that black towel, or was it blue at one time. “While we stood there looking at things just in case something would come to our minds, a truck pulled over. “ ‘Well young ladies. I see you have a slight problem,’ he said trying to be unconcerned about this issue. That look said it looked like something we should be concerned about, I thought. “ ‘Just stand to the side while I get my tool box. Sometimes I can fix these problems in a jiffy. Then you could be on your way.’ “As he whistled away he took out different tools, but ended by just putting them back. ‘Sorry, but this is one beast that I cannot fix. It needs the expertise of a real mechanic. Who owns this vehicle and where are you from?’ “ ‘It is my dad’s car,’ stated June. ‘We are from Canada.’ “ ‘How come he let you two take this rattle trap so far away by yourselves? What were you doing way out here anyway?’ “After explaining why we were here and who we saw, etc. the concerned look on his face turned into a grin. ‘I know your Auntie Z. I am sure she is the only Auntie Z around. She is an old school friend of my Mrs. They have not seen each other for many moons but I am sure she is just as nice now as I have heard she ever was. “ ‘Well, take anything you do not wish to leave behind and I will give you a lift into the garage. I use Buffalo Bill all the time. He is as straight as an arrow. He has told me how his Pa showed him how to shoot an arrow. Says his Pa took down a few buffalo in his younger years, hence the name.’ By now he had laughter written all over his face. I began to wonder just how much is true and does this story grow each time?

“Soon we were at the garage. This kind man explained the situation ending by saying to give the bill to him. He will be stopping in next week on his next trip through. Before he left both June and I thanked him profusely. Even though he said how safe we were I did feel a little nervous when he left us there. We were now on our own in a strange place. Two sixteen-year-old girls suddenly were not as worldly as we had always thought we were. “Buffalo Bill had sat our boxes of apples to the side so as they would not be touched by anyone. While making a phone call to June’s dad he explained that there was another trucker expected to pull in about a half hour. He would be going our way and he was sure we could catch a ride somewhere nearer our house. A lucky day for us I thought.”

“Buffalo Bill was a large man with broad shoulders. He had been a bull rider doing the circuit until one day he was trampled by an ugly bull with a real mean temperament. Bruiser was dark gray with two nasty looking horns that he was always waiting to sink into some poor cowboy. Weighing in at 1,750 pounds of meanness he drew a great deal of respect from everywhere he went. “When he witnessed first hand the meanness in Bruiser he knew it was time to trade in his hat for something else while he could still walk. He would be feeling the unfriendliness of Bruiser for some time to come. Trucking was not for me said Buffalo Bill. He needed something that he could claim as a not moving home. “This one day Bill’s brother Tuff, also a bull rider had the bad luck to draw Bruiser. As soon as Tuff went near the chute he knew he was in trouble. Bruiser was pawing and snorting. One look at Tuff and he began to shake his head furiously. Now it is time for prayer. “The end result was that Tuff hung on until we thought he would make the eight seconds, but with two seconds to go he was flying through the air landing hard on his back just below the shoulders. His bull riding days had just ended, but not without leaving him with a yen for the road. “A couple days after being released from hospital, he visited an old buddy of his father’s. Just like his Pa said he was looking for a driver. A truck driver. The loads would always be light with long days. His knew he would be bunking in a big wheeler. He would eat and sleep there. By the end of the day Tuff was looking for a closest size room to rent to store some of his valuables like his beloved saddle. “By the end of the week he was settled. He had a new address to collect his mail if any should come his way. His treasured saddle would be safe. So would the memories that came with it. Could he really still smell the scent of a pretty flowery perfume that had been left behind when Flora left him to go home to take care of her mother. With many promises to write her letters became shorter and fewer until there was no more. Had she found someone else? While he told himself it was over he could not stop looking for a special letter. One day he took his broken heart and headed out on the road for good. No more looking back.

“Returning from Tuff’s first trip on the road he showed up with a smile on his face. I finally had my brother back again said Bill. Even my heart is lighter. “Just as I was about to start kidding him about a new lady in his life, she jumped out of the cab. A pretty little red head. He always was partial to red heads. Only this one had four feet and curly hair. “She was a standard poodle that somehow got mixed with a smaller dog that also had been a mixed breed. Tuff liked that better than a pure bred. He could not have one that was about to leave hair everywhere or was full of energy. Her name was Lucy, and she was trained. “It was not long before Lucy and Tuff were pals, but then who would not wish to be buddies with a guy with a pocket full of treats. “Lucy was not just a dog. She was his companion. One that he talked to. Shared secrets with. Discussed his problems with her. She always listened with not a whimper of complaint. “Tuff’s first paycheck he spent some of it on two special soft large towels. One for him whenever he stopped at a truck stop that had a shower for the drivers needing to freshen up for the remainder of their haul. The other was for his new lady friend. He carefully folded it to the just the right size to fit the front enger seat where he could find Lucy contentedly curled up for her naps. It always appeared to Tuff that Lucy was sleeping, but whenever he slowed his rig down she jumped up taking a look out the window. Either to check things out or see what was so special or where they were. She knew every stop. “After a couple trips she knew her favourite stop. Lucy was ready and waiting for them to come to a full stop. It was the one where they both had a shower and a hot hamburger. When Tuff ordered the two hamburgers he asked for a slice of cheese on one. It was the one that was specially for Lucy. The staff gave Tuff two individual packets of jam for his extra bun. There was a black coffee to go for himself and a milk to go for Lucy. Then a walk around the wild grass for Lucy to find her favourite spot to do her business. She never missed. Then they were on their way again. “On his Friday trip she seemed to know that this was their longest day, but tomorrow we would sleep on a different bed in our very small room. Lucy missed the sounds of the vehicles pulling into the truck stop at different hours of

the night. “Saturdays Lucy could be seen following Tuff around town as though they had been friends forever. She knew when she had to wait by the door, sometimes outside, and when she could walk by his side. “When Sunday evening came she would jump up on his lap licking his hands until it was time to settle for the night. Then it was time to stand up and smother his face with kisses. Was this her way of saying I am glad we are on the road again tomorrow? “As for Bill, affectionately known as Buffalo Bill, he had thought it was time to hang up his spurs. His bull riding days should be over for him too. He recognized that he is not getting any younger. This is a sport for the young bucks. “There was this tiny garage in town that was for sale. Just his size and budget. So with a lot of hard work, long hours and penny pinching Bill was able to build his business to what it is today. Truckers come for miles around to have it serviced by Bill. He was good and he was always honest. “Bill had a very large charcoal coloured dog, a mixture of a Newfoundlander and a Russian something or other breed. He was big with no energy, but exceptionally friendly and well trained. Each morning he would take himself for a walk around town returning in time for his morning nap. Thunder was gentle. He carried his leash in his mouth drawing attention from visitors to take his picture. Thunder loved to pose. He had been trained to not accept food from anyone but Bill. Buffalo Bill and Thunder were a well known pair. They could be found at the local fairs and rodeos posing for a picture whenever asked. They were a couple of showmen. There was no charge. “There is the story that says Bill and Thunder lost control of their black horse Lusitano on the way home from a night on the town a few years ago. They had stayed in town to close the Monkey Ranch down at midnight. Bill had never quite done that so thought he owed it to himself for one big splurge with his buddies. Thunder patiently waited by the door for his friend. While travelling along a bushy area they came across a black bear that Thunder had startled. Lusitano went into action. One swift kick of a hoof sent the young bear running to the bush to the safety of his family.

“Bill said there was no doubt his heart was beating overtime. His stallion had flown into action. His huge black dog doubled in size as he too seized upon the young bear. Seeing the back end of the bear instead of the front end with large teeth flashing was a beautiful sight. A sight that he will never forget. “There are many stories to be heard from Buffalo Bill for the young people. They could pet Thunder and Lusitano. Sometimes mothers brought their camera along for a keepsake memory. Whenever Buffalo Bill had time he would let them have a ride within the coral. “Even as a youngster Bill was an animal lover. No abuse of animals allowed in his town. He was no veterinarian and never pretended to be, but as a youngster he trailed after his Uncle as he visited sick animals always asking questions. He was known to bring small animals to see his Uncle to be fixed up. Bill soaked up every word he could that would help his furry friends.”

Chapter Ten

A couple years later . . .

For the first couple years of being away from the circuit he had a difficult time hanging around the rodeo grounds for long. It was like a part of him was missing. He did not wish to go alone. Thunder had become his steady companion, but Bill often told him that fur does not replace delicate soft skin. Thinking that Bill would be more comfortable outside of the coral he was asked if he would pose under the Gum Tree for pictures. Perhaps where Bill can view the activities near this end of the grounds will cheer him up. They would announce his presence periodically. There were pictures of Bill and Thunder displayed around the grounds. Since Bill was becoming a little more withdrawn as the days wore on he readily agreed. He knew he needed something to get his life back on track. This time it was a very warm day. There was not a slight breeze to be had. It was hotter than usual on rodeo days. Either that or an unexpected rainstorm blew in. Pesky flies were hanging around to either pester the horses or enter your house the moment the doors open. There was no way Bill wished to be standing under a Gum Tree waiting for the mothers and children to show with their cameras. But no matter what he was not about to let himself down. This was the least he could do for his fans, and there were many. Everywhere he went someone would call his name. The children ran to Thunder so they could rub his head as they snuggled against his soft fur. Bill had promised himself he would never forget his fans. They were the ones that made him who he is now. He owed them, and he knew it. Buffalo Bill always paid his debts. The Gum Tree became just as famous as he and Thunder. People that visited town stopped to take their pictures under Buffalo Bill’s Gum Tree. This Gum Tree was one he sat under as a teenager when he was sweet on a young lady in town. Petunia. This was a memory he never shared and no one else seemed to . They shared their first kiss as the moon shone brightly in the night sky with twinkling stars.

They spoke of their desires of a future together, but then Bill landed a job in the Rodeo. At first Petunia was going to wait, but time moved on. Returning from one trip a letter waited for him. My dearest Bill. I am sorry I can no longer wait and the circuit is not the life for me . . . The rest of it was a blur that he no longer could . It hurt too much. He too would move on. Each time he walked to the Gum Tree that held some of his heart he envisioned a sweet pretty lass with strawberry blond hair waiting for him. Each time he left with his heart breaking into more small pieces as he wondered just what had happened to Sweet Petunia. It was as though her and her family had disappeared along with the dark rain cloud that had showered them that romantic night. The rain gave them the shivers but Bill didn’t mind. It was another reason to snuggle close. Finally the day came when Bill neared the Gum Tree that he thought he could see someone sitting on the ground looking up at the blue sky. Must be a tourist he thought. Perhaps someone ing through town that wished to have a quick picture before continuing on their way. Thunder walked beside him sensing there was a stranger nearby. He was in his protective mode lest someone wished to tangle with his owner. After a couple growls of warning the lady stood up. “Goodness Gracious Sakes Alive! Is it you Petunia?” “Yes Bill. It is I.” “Where had you gotten to? Why did you just run off?” Bill was not in the mood for small talk. He wanted answers, and now. The answers he had been waiting for. “That is a bit of a story,” said Petunia. “This is now and that was then. Can we talk? I believe there is so much for both of us to say.” “Are you alone?” Bill asked. After a couple moments of silence, a few tears trickled down her face. “My children are here with me.” So she is married. And with a family! Do I have anything to say to her now or

better yet does she have anything to say for herself. Bill just stood there waiting for Petunia to lead the way. He did not know what to think. Before she spoke a family came over requesting a few pictures. And then another couple and more families came with their cameras. It was nearing dusk when the last visitor left. Petunia patiently waited, but now there were three young red heads with her rolling around on the wild grass. As Bill stood there wondering just what to say they all stood still. As it turns out the middle one was a girl. A chatterbox. “Do you know our momma?” she asked as she squinted at me. “Yes. We were friends in school,” Bill said not willing to offer anything more. “Perhaps we could meet for coffee tomorrow while my children are in summer school. Please?” asked Petunia. “Alright. See you at Jacks Coffee Tin.” “At ten o’clock,” Petunia said. With that she turned and walked away as she listened to Chatterbox asking questions. Bill would need to leave the shop in the hands of Wilbur. Wilbur had only been left alone once before and he didn’t burn the place down so Bill figured he would not this time either. Wilbur knew the rules while at the shop. Wilbur had been with Bill for nearly a year. He is a very quiet young man that takes his responsibilities seriously. Since his father suddenly ed away from a heart attack he has stepped up to the plate to be the man in the house. He has two little brothers, and a mother that works at the local hotel cleaning rooms. Bill always said he felt bad that Wilbur is not able to continue with his schooling although he has said that he is doing some studies at home so that one day he will graduate. The next morning Thunder and Bill arrived earlier than usual. Bill had a few things to do to make up for the time that he would be losing. Besides, he wanted to set an example. If this is what he would expect Wilbur to do so must he. When Bill entered Jacks Coffee Tin he noticed an empty table in the far corner.

It looked like a good spot for sharing some private talk. Tables were clean but did sport a few cigarette burns even though a clean ashtray sat in the center of the table. Bill chose the chair facing the door. His excuse would be so he could keep an eye on Thunder. Everyone knew it was more like Thunder kept an eye on him. Bill had no idea how Petunia feels about a dog but he knew Thunder was not going anywhere except with him. He was not ready for a-forgive and forget conversation. Well, that was until Petunia walked in. His heart took a leap followed by fluttering that said really? Settle down, heart of mine for murgatroyd sakes! Being the gentleman Bill was, he stood and held a chair for her. Now he is not a man of many words, he knew that but even the few he knew would not come. After some steaming coffee was set before them Petunia thanked him for coming adding my name is now Petunia Scott. All Bill could do was nod as in his head he heard, Speak Bill, speak. Shy Petunia let it all spill out in one tumbling string. The end of her story is that her husband ran off with a young girl a week after Petunia and baby came home from the hospital. This was their third child. Crying children bother him he told her. He was not going to listen to noisy kids any more. After they covered the basics Bill said he was sorry but he had to get back to the shop. Perhaps they could talk again another day. With that they parted ways with no promises as to when they would meet again. From then on Bill and his troubled heart could be found working long hours in his shop, the Pit Stop Auto Shop. Rumor was that Petunia was now living on the edge of town while working at the other cafe in town. The Grind. Bill set his mind on fixing vehicles for his customers. Many noticed that his mind was not just there, but somewhere in cloud heaven at times. No one made an issue of it. It is just Bill being himself.

The months rolled on by with winter creeping in. For some reason this time of year always brought back memories for Bill of him and his father discussing the future. Somehow everyone thought his father did the speaking and Bill the listening. Bill says he will always those times and the wisdom his father shared with him. His dad told him over and over how one day Mt St Helens would erupt. “Dad. No one knows anything about that mountain in Washington. And besides it will never effect those of us living in Canada.” His dad said that they were predicting there would be Volcanic Ash and steam spewing out. The plumes of fiery hot ash expelled will kill people. Will this giant Volcano shake the earth? Will this Volcano be accompanied by a huge earthquake changing the world to come? How fast will the blast travel? Some thought it would be all throughout North America while others thought only in Washington. How much of the forest will be burned? Others spoke of the wild animals living in the forest. What would happen to them? Some boasted of taking pictures with their cameras when the day came. They would sell them to tourists. Most people were determined to save some of the ash. There were many false predictions made during his father’s time. One Harvard biologist predicted that civilization will end within 15 or 30 years unless immediate action was taken against the problems facing mankind. Some believed him while other laughed at him. Another hot topic was how man must stop pollution and conserve their resources to save the race from deterioration and maybe even extinction. If nothing else this brought about great controversy. At least it was something to talk about, mostly by the men. Someone spread the word that people will be starving to death in the next few years due to the small increases of food supplies. Bill said he could not there being any end to the wild predictions of the future. Many people were frightened while others thought some people were just going bonkers. The men never seemed to tire of discussing these predictions.

Everyone had an opinion, and they were willing to share given half a chance because they were the ones that were right. Just like his father Bill enjoyed listening to the predictions as well as the news traveling throughout our country. Now it is the young people that come to visit Buffalo Bill. They are in awe of this whale of a man. They call him the Story Teller wondering if his stories are true or just something he has made up. Either way they all look up to him and Thunder. Thunder was getting old. He was content to lay in the shade soaking up the affection that came his way, and the treats. Arnold went on to say him and Bill were just a couple of young bucks sharing dreams and guy talk. Arnold had his eye on Lily. He was getting ready to settle down with a family of his own. Bill had his eye on the rodeo. Just a couple more years he would say. Every season he would say, ‘I just want one more kick at the can.’ The other evening Louis and I were enjoying our second cup of coffee as we took in the view from the fresh outdoors when Louis asked me if I was happy living in this now intermediate town with all its quirks and oddities. “I sure am. It has so much to offer do you not think? Like a husband, or is it the wife?” I laughed. With that said, Louis put his arm around my shoulder pulling me closer for a kiss on my temple. I shall savour these little moments of tenderness. Many women do not have this tenderness to relish. “There certainly are a variety of folks and shops to suit everyone. I always wished it would not grow too quickly giving everyone an opportunity to establish themselves. It does seem to have paced itself prudently. I really am pleased that brother Wade chose this town to put in a department style store,” Louise said. At the time it was very small leaving some people to wonder if it will grow or shrink into the past. It grew! And Hibbard’s has made the largest contribution. Folks can stay here and shop instead of giving their money to the larger retailers in a larger city.

There were enough visitors from the farms to help our economy grow. Strangers were not creeping around the alleyways. There was just the Allen family to keep things interesting with one antic or another. Everyone felt the only one in their danger zone seemed to be Sally. Curtis constantly had his eye on her. For some reason the Allen men felt that women were their property, and they could treat them as they wished. Curtis was determined that Sally was to be his girl. As a child Sally was a scrapper. The boys in school would call her names. She was not one to ignore it. Well not until she stuck her tongue out at them before running away to play with the girls. Her favourite game during recess was Red Rover. She was tough, but always smiling. This game was played by dividing the group into two teams. The teams formed a line approximately twenty feet apart. The teams then took part in calling out, “Red Rover, Red Rover, let ?? come over!” Sally loved to be called. She would run as fast as she could to the other line breaking her way through. She then chose someone to move to the team she was on. By the time the game ended Sally’s team usually had the most players. Most of the time the opposite team would not call her over as she would always break through the line. But the boys wanted to prove to her she could not break through. Their arms were stronger. So with all their might they hung on to each other’s wrists as tight as they could. Sometimes they triumphed and sometimes they did not much to their deflated ego. Sally and her team cheered wildly. It got so bad the teacher said she had to take turns as to which team she would be on. There was to be no bad sports, but some boys went into class rubbing their red arms and sullen faces. One favourite neighbourhood game as it began to get dark out was Ghost in the Graveyard. This was much like many versions of tag. When the hidden person is found, the first player to see them shouts Ghost in the Graveyard running back to their base before the Ghost catches them. This always involved much spooky sounds, yelling and whooping. The scarier the game and tougher the game was what brought Sally into her element. She loved to beat the boys. The feeling was not willingly shared. While she was cheering with her arms in the air the boys were booing her. The girls were going wild with exhilaration. Next time, and there will be a next time.

Soon Curtis had his eye on Sally. He was the prefect gentleman. He was always charming and polite. He knew the right words to say. He told her how he liked a girl with spunk. One that could laugh. One that was not afraid to take on the world. He unknowingly built up her confidence more than he will come to appreciate. Eventually he persuaded Sally to marry him with promises of how he would take care of her. She would never go hungry. He loved children and puppies. They would have a home of their own. Everyone saw Curtis as the golden haired boy that came from a tougher home life, but grew up to be a gentleman. Every girl in town thought Sally had met her prince charming. It was but a matter of months when Sally found herself pregnant. A little sooner than she had wished but Curtis assured her they would be fine. The baby was only a matter of months old when she found she was once again pregnant. This time she began to wonder just what he had done. He assured her he had taken a precaution and did not know what happened either time. The next day while Curtis was at work she decided to check things out. Sure enough there was a pin-hole in the end of each condom. He was making sure she got pregnant. What was he up to? A month went by and all she could think of was how she would not have any more babies. Two was enough. Her feeling was there could be a change in the air. Now it was her turn to turn the tables. She had a plan, but first she must have this baby. John was eleven months old when Charles was born. They would be playmates. Six months flew by. If she so much as coughed he was asking her if she was all right. After a month she decided to play along. She began to feign morning sickness, just a little. While Curtis tried to be concerned about how she felt there were moments when she caught a glimpse of a smile on his lips. After a couple days she returned to feeling her normal self. “I must have eaten too many onions,” she would say. Whenever he made it clear that it was time for another baby Sally would say, “Well, maybe. We will see. Right now I am busy with the boys.” Some days she pretended she was completely worn out when he came home.

The boys are so much work she would say. Dinner was still expected to be on the table and waiting for him. If the boys required her attention he would demand she put them in their room until he had his dinner. He needed to eat in peace and quiet. This was playing heavier and heavier on her nerves. It was beginning to show. Curtis was cutting her off from her friends and family. As the days went on Sally knew he was working on more control over her and he would not stop until he broke her. What could she do? Then one day it appeared to her that her prayers were being answered. Curtis was going to be laid off or he could move to their other store. This was in the next town, not far away. While Sally was heartbroken because she would not be near her parents they assured her it would work out. She plugged through it all. The thick and the thin. So as to not aggravate Curtis she kept herself busy with the boys going nowhere. Soon they were both in school. She was now coveting a waitress job in town, but first she must convince Curtis that she would take a job to give him better meals. They would no longer be eating soup from pork shank that he hated, but it was all she could get with pennies as he continued to spend his paycheque on booze and chewing tobacco. Her extra work would be all for him. The butcher gave her bones for her dog she had convinced him they had. Word around town was that he never believed it for a moment, he just thought she was desperate. The bones he set aside for her had meat left on them. He just could not bear to do otherwise. Her package always held two wieners for the boys. She hid them until the next day when she packed them in their lunch box. Somehow they knew to never mention it at home for fear of receiving a whipping because they didn’t share with their father. Eventually Sally decided to brave it and approach the Rascal Rally Diner. Much to her surprise she was greeted by a gentleman that looked vaguely familiar. Actually much like her father. They each held their breath for a moment until they knew it was true. They were siblings. He was the older brother that had moved away to build a life for himself. A life where his father did not know where he was.

As soon as she spoke he reached for her hand. “Sally?” he questioned. “Tell me it is you.” “Yes it is.” Clifford Cook said he needed some more help. It was hers. “You will be safer here where I am near. Please say yes.” By the time Sally left she had a job and a new name. From here on at the Diner she would be known as Wanda MacCaa. Curtis never needs to know of her name change said Clifford. Should anyone ask she is an orphan. There would be no familiarity between them, just boss and employee. So Sally called her brother Mr. Cook to prevent any suspicion. At work she was Wanda. Curtis loved the idea there was now more money for him. As soon as she walked through the door on her payday he had his hand out. He said it was his. When she tried to explain that it was for the household such as food he got rough with her until she handed it over leaving her with barely enough to cover the basic food bill. He loved to pull her across the room by her hair until she felt the roots would come loose if not out. As the boys grew older they quickly learned to rush to the table when asked. They became the two most sullen boys shrinking into themselves in order to avoid their father’s wrath for even the smallest thing. When the boys were little Curtis was often seen by someone in town pulling their ears so hard they were afraid he would tear them off their heads. The word was that Sally had to sneak a damp cloth in to wash away the blood that was surfacing inside their ears lest the teacher would notice. They quickly learned to not cry or he would give them a wallop across the back of their head as he yelled at them, degrading them in front of others. He was a nasty bully. Life became a little easier when the boys moved out. They could not stand the abuse any longer. It was a few years before either of them was in with their mother. Until Curtis was in jail Sally never ed them. Such a terrible burden for a mother to bear. How anyone can survive in such abuse and fear is beyond me. Even her sons never knew of her name change. While it was not legally changed no one knew the difference. At work she was Wanda. It seemed that whenever Curtis was in some scrape he was given a week in jail

to sober up. While no one dared to say it they knew it was also to give Wanda a week of peace. I often wonder as Stella speaks how Wanda re if she is Wanda or Sally. I am not sure I could find peace with such a life of pain and turmoil. Wanda says she never speaks of Anna in front of Curtis for fear he would then lash out at her after all Wanda was not to have any friends or even to be speaking to someone got her a strong lashing. To Curtis should he witness Wanda at the Diner, Anna was assured she was just a long time customer. Hannah took sick shortly after Anna’s wedding. Louis had a telephone installed for Anna’s convenience. He was always adding some little thing for her handiness. She could also use it to call her mother and or Hannah once in a while. Anna was careful not to overuse it even though Louis would say it was no problem. Without anyone mentioning it she knew to never call Wanda as Curtis could trace it to her. This would be dangerous for both her and Wanda. Telephone operators were sometimes nick named the “Hello Girl”. In some rural areas and small towns homeowners were on a party line. There was a ring system for each household. It was not considered polite to listen in on anyone’s conversation on your party line, but it was also known to happen. The word of caution was to never say anything you did not wish to have spread throughout the community. While Curtis insisted they have a telephone Wanda told me her and the boys never used it. They were adamant they would never have anything that was listed in their name. Just like Wanda tried her best to leave no trace behind they did not either. She was even too afraid to use the phone in the diner for fear he would trace her activity even if it was only once. Gus and Hannah had requested their telephone to be near the bed so as for Hannah to receive and make calls. It kept her connected to the outside world. Whenever she felt up to it she would call Anna. There were times that she felt like confiding in a friend. While when anyone asked her how she was feeling her standard answer was pretty good followed by it does seem that I am forever needing more rest. To Anna her answer was much more direct. There were times she just needed to unload her concerns. She was not holding her own any longer. Within herself she

knew she was failing. While she never wished to have visitors Anna and her family were always wanted. Tito did not visit as often on his own, but he did take some short moments to say hello to his Auntie. Luella seemed to visit a little more. Frank frequently had some business not far away so he would drop Luella off for some alone time. One day they both asked me if I thought Auntie Hannah was failing. I could not lie to them so I said yes, but it is something she finds very hard to talk about. “Why did you ask?” “Well we both think she does not look as well as she always did and her breathing is not nearly as good. She seems to be tired all the time. We never stay long so she would not feel she must stay awake. Is she going to die soon?” Luella asked. “I really do not know. As you both know only God knows that. It does seem to me too that she is slowly getting weaker. For now we need to pray for her. that we never wish to see someone suffer from the pain of any disease.” It was just a few weeks later that I received the phone call that Hannah had been taken to the hospital. She needed oxygen full time. She would like to see me. While I went to her bedside to hold her hand Louis and Gus stepped out for a few minutes. I know it was to give us private time. I was shocked at just how much more she had gone down. It was frightening. Now I knew why she asked for me to come. She wished to say goodbye. How does one say goodbye to someone so special? We all know that one day our time too will be up here on earth, but it is never today. It is always sometime a long way away. When we were leaving Louis said to Hannah he would bring me back in a couple days unless she wished for my company sooner just have someone call. We are never too busy to visit someone so special. With that we turned and left. By the time we were at the car I was so overcome with tears I could barely see.

They were streaming down my face like a water-fall. My handkie was drenched so Louis handed me his blue plaid one that I had washed and washed every week. The remainder of the trip I sat closer so I could rest my head against his shoulder as I continued to sob. After we were home for a while Louis excused himself to go to his office. He would phone Tito and Luella. I knew he was trying to spare me the added grief of hearing this story over and over. Some moments I was wishing I could hear every little word to be sure I was not missing anything. Then I knew that if I had I would find it too much to bear. I must go to work tomorrow. Life should remain as close to normal as possible. That is what Hannah would want. She always said life was for the living, but not without those dear to you.

Chapter Eleven

This terrible whirlwind seems to have been ages ago. I still can barely think about it. One day Hannah was smiling and laughing and the next she was in a coma. How could one’s life change so rapidly? As much as I have tried to not dwell on that sorrowful day when we said our final goodbyes at the end of a beautiful service my memory still takes me to the sad moments of the day. As I walked behind her from the chapel to her resting place I realized this would be the last time I would ever walk with my dear Hannah. My heart was so broken Louis was practically carrying me as we both made this slow walk as the guests all sang “Just a Closer Walk with Thee.” Neither of us were able to in. We were too overcome with grief.

Life has a way of moving on. One moment we think we cannot live another day without our loved one that has gone to heaven, but we must. They are always in our hearts and minds as our body trudges ahead in the tiniest steps. Just like the winter wind a new life creeps up. A life that we learn to live with. We had just finished our Sunday dinner when Luella and Frank said they had something to tell us. It was not that often that they came to visit us on a Sunday so we like to make the most of it. Tito even is sure to be around, and this time it is not just to eat. I was about to cut the fresh apple pie that everyone loved. Louis had brought home some vanilla ice cream to top it off. Our minds were not hearing what they were about to say. “Gee Luella,” I said. “I am sorry I did not hear what you said. It seems my mind is still not where it should be. Please tell me again.” “She is pregnant!” stated Tito in a clear voice. “Oh my goodness! That is great news.” Both Louis and I jumped up to hug the two of them. This was just the news we needed. I went from glum to excitement in a flash. Now we had something to look forward to. After sitting and talking over the apple pie Louis started to laugh. If you kids need to head for home I shall help Grandma with the dishes. “All right, thanks Grandpa,” said Luella with a twinkle in her eye. She sure has Bubba wrapped around her finger. As Louis and I sat in the living room after clearing the supper dishes we of course went over and over the idea of a new little one in our lives. All of a sudden something hit me. “Louis did you hear Luella say something about a girl to Tito. Then he promptly shushed her?” “Gosh! Yes I did. I meant to mention it a little later, but the news of a baby took over in my mind. Do you suppose there is finally someone special there?” “I hope so, but do hope it is not that girl that I have seen him with. You know, the one that is the daughter of the doctor.” “Me too,” said Louis. “She is a spoiled brat. Her age and she still has temper

tantrums. I think I will cautiously have a chat with Tito. Are you alright with that?” “Of course. I think a man-to-man talk will go over better than a mother to son talk.” A few nights later when we had finished our supper for some strange reason I felt a flicker of emotion run through my bones. Something is about to happen here that I am not aware of. Sure enough, Tito and Louis had disappeared. Whatever is up? Something is going through their minds. Just like when children are young, they are much too quiet. After finishing the dishes and making sure the kitchen was tidy I went in search of the two main men in my life. They are already needing to make room for one more. Frank has fit into our family ever so nicely. He said to me, while the mushing was going on, that he feels as though he has always been a part of our family. Just the way I like it. Bud would be so proud of Luella’s choice. But how would he feel about his little girl now being Mrs. Harris? I am not usually one to eavesdrop but given this opportunity I found myself being a good listener. Tape measures were reeling in and out. I could have been standing in the middle of the room without being seen. Finally I could not stand it any longer. “So what are you two up to?” I asked. “Well, we thought it just might be time to do our man job in the baby room so Grandma can fill it with all kinds of frilly stuff,” said Louis. “But what if it is a boy?” Just as he went to go out to go to who knows where other than the girlfriends place Tito said, “Mom is it alright if I bring someone to Sunday dinner with me?” “Of course it is, and by the way you do still live here, do you not?” Wearing a huge grin he just shook his head. “Well Lu said that I had better or she will tell on me. So can I?”

Louis was nearly bursting by the time Tito walked out the door. “Now my dear, you look like the cat that just ate the canary. What is up?” That was as far as I got with that conversation so thought I may as well drop it until Sunday. Time will tell, it is always said. I was so excited to go to work this week. As quickly as I could eat I headed to the baby department to see what I could find. Ohhh! so many sweet things. Could I just buy one of each or is that overindulging? Well perhaps just a little. It is times like this that I miss my crazy friend Nancy. Her husband was transferred to Alberta so we just do not get to see each other. I miss her goofiness. We had so many laughs every time we were together. Now we have memories but it is difficult to hear the ring of her wild laughter. The week went quickly. My heart was all aflutter. Sometimes I thought I would jump out of my skin just from the pure joy and excitement. I shall be a grandma! Yes, a grandma! Oh Bud. I miss you so much. You were my first true love. My only farmer to love. We dreamed and shared of the beautiful life we would have together watching our family grow. You always made sure I knew that you loved me. There was no other. We would laugh at the night you first came for dinner. Farm life was hard work, but we were so happy. We had very little and yet we thought we had it all. Then you were taken from me. My dear loving husband. You left me with a shattered heart that I was sure would never heal. As much as I love Louis I still think of you when I am having a quiet time. I think I hear you coming thru the door wearing that beautiful smile. I can still feel your kisses as you held me close if only for a moment. I miss you darling!

Chapter Twelve

Before I knew it I was making Sunday dinner. This was a good day to put a big Chuck roast in the oven. When cooked for a long time at a low temperature it was fork cutting tender, lean and succulent. Everyone looked forward to cold roast beef sandwiches in their lunch, depending on the amount of leftovers. Eventually I heard the front door open and closely followed by soft voices. I thought this girl is really receiving the special treatment. Our family uses the kitchen door. Soft footsteps were quickly leading towards the kitchen. This is the moment. “Mom, this is Glenda Brown. This is my mom.” “Hello Mrs. Moore. Thank you for having me in your home for dinner. It does smell delicious.” What a lovely girl both filled with manners and beautiful looks. She must be the keeper. “We are so happy to have you with us,” I said. “Dinner will be ready in a couple minutes. Tito can show where you can wash up.” Much to my relief Louis walked in the door. “Hello Glenda. Are you going to be taking this appetite off our hands?” With a shocked look I felt so embarrassed for her. This is so unlike Louis. Before I knew something else could happen I handed him the butcher knife. In seconds Tito and Glenda were back. Tito began to place chairs around the table while Glenda was beside me asking if there was anything she could do. Such a delightful girl. Tito could not stop smiling at her, and she at him. As usual there was little chatter during the main meal. Glenda was quick to jump to her feet to help clear the table for dessert. Tito whispered to her, “Told you there would be apple pie. Bubba picks them on the edge of town in an empty field.” “I am sure they are good. We will all just love them,” said polite Glenda in a soft voice. Louis could not stop smiling at me. He too was taken. When the remains of a big dinner were cleared away we all retired in the living

room. While Tito and Glenda sat next to each other a polite distance was kept. Bud would have been so proud of his son. He is being a perfect gentleman just like his father. Following a few minutes of idle chatter Louis suggested to Tito that he would take a look at his car to see just what the problem squeak could be. As they got up to leave Tito said, “Oh Mom I am not sure how much you know about Polio, but Glenda knows everything there is to know and will tell it all to you. It will give you two something to talk about. Bye!” Oh! That was all I could think of to say. But sweet Glenda jumped in to my rescue. In a moment she was chattering away. “First of all please do not worry about upsetting me when we talk about it. It has been a part of my life since I was young. My parents taught me about Polio from the start, and how to react when others are around. I was eight years old when my father noticed a slight limp in my left leg. Two days later I began to feel pain so I was taken to visit the Doctor as I could not getting hurt but there was definitely a feeling of stiffness in my leg. My throat was sore. By evening time I had a fever. I had a flu-like symptom typical of a virus illness. My limbs were beginning to feel loose and floppy. By the next day fatigue was settling in. All I wanted to do was sleep. My parents insisted that I follow the doctor’s instructions to exercise so as to prevent as much loss of strength as possible. They massaged my limbs to keep my circulation moving. They helped me stand and encouraged me as I tried to walk. Even just a few steps each time. I was getting weaker. I had no appetite. I was losing weight. Soon I became a slight replica of myself. Once a happy balanced little girl, but they never gave up. I must be vaccinated. My new home was now in the hospital away from my family and friends. The average age of polio victims was now between 5 and 9 years. I fit right in. Parents lived in fear of warm weather - polio weather. Public health and recommendations and warnings were everywhere. People were dying. Every time children turned around their parents were curtailing their activities. I was rushed to City Hospital and placed in an iron lung, a cylindrical machine designed to do the work of paralyzed muscles that affected breathing and

swallowing. It was terrifying. Perhaps it was fortunate that I was too weak to fight my confinement. Normally I would have fought like a wild cat when they put me in that horrid metal box with a set of bellows attached at one end to pump air in and out. I was enclosed in an airtight chamber with the exception of my head. When I settled my mind down and began to relax and let the lung breath for me I would drift off as though I was floating in the clouds with no worry. I was too weak to cry for my parents. They came and went as often as possible. I continued to drift in and out of sleep. After losing my older brother three years earlier from a drowning accident, they were extra fearful at the slightest irregularity. No matter how much they were reassured that I was in good hands they wept just at the thought. My dad tried to be the strongest. He would stroke my forehead while he sang to me. He has a beautiful voice. He is the choir leader at our church. At first he sang quietly so as to not disturb others until one day a doctor heard him. He was asked to sing louder to cheer the others up too. Soon he found he was walking up and down the long rows of iron machines singing to everyone. The children received an extra gentle touch. He would stroke their foreheads for a moment just as he did mine. Long after I was released he returned to sing for them. My mother also became a caregiver of sorts. When my dad was with me she would spend a couple minutes talking and praying with a frightened patient that had no family to visit, like most of them. Parents all worried frantically about there being a power failure. There would be no way to keep the iron machines breathing for us. They all knew we would die.” I sat there staring at Glenda. She spoke so maturely and calmly about her horrifying experience. She said it is now behind her. Well it is until she gets older. This is a disease that will likely return, but for now she is not going to let it ruin her life. As we prepared for bed Louis asked me how I liked Glenda. “I think she is not only very pretty but a very nice young lady. So polite. She told me all about her polio when she was a young brave girl. I can not help but ire her.”

“That is good,” said Louis. “I think she will be ing our family, that is if her dad says yes to Tito. I was both surprised and proud that he asked me if I thought it was all right to speak with her father. He wanted to know if I thought you would like her.” “Well, we do not really know her, but we need to trust Tito. Not all marriages are made of the best choices. I try not to be biased but I do think that he is like his father. He has a good head on his shoulders. Thanks for taking your time to listen to him. I am so pleased that both Tito and Luella look up to you as their father figure.” “And I am so proud they feel that way. By the way the last time I talked to Vance he said that he is now comfortable having another mother and is planning to call you Mom. Hope that is alright with you and Tito and Luella.” “For sure,” I said. Now that we have all that settled we can just become happy grandparents. It is time to end all the fussing and get on with our lives as one family. Hopefully Vance and Stella will also give us some little ones to enjoy. A few weeks later I was wandering through the baby department at Hibbard’s just to be sure I was not missing anything that we just must have I heard someone call ‘Sally!’ My heart stopped mid-beat. Who was calling? I have to know. Where is she? Is it Wanda they are speaking to? After wandering to where I thought the voice came from I saw two ladies chatting. I found myself frozen. I stared at them. Neither one was Wanda. As I turned to walk away I realized they were staring back at me. I needed out of the store for fresh air.

For days I could not shake the feeling that Wanda was still alive. She just needs to be found. It was a couple weeks later that Louis needed to visit with Gus regarding some business. “I think you should come with me just for the drive and change of scenery.” While the air was fresh and the breeze was lightly shaking the trees the sun was peering out between the wispy clouds giving us an ever so little warmth as it shone throughout the car. As we drove past the wild rose bushes I noticed how extra pretty they looked. In particular there was that one large deep pink bush that was so much bigger than the others that today seemed to glow. I could not take my eyes off it. It caught my curiosity. What was it about that was taking hold of me. On our way home Louis pulled over beside the road where I had seen the beautiful rose bush. As we sat in the car with the window rolled down we both commented on the powerful scent it was giving for the breeze to help share with those ing by. I wondered why it should be so much sturdier than the smaller bushes. I had not realized that this bush was becoming the talk of the community with its fragrant scent. Many said how they had never noticed it before. I wonder what makes it so special this year was a popular comment. Perhaps it is just something new to talk about. Something that noone has paid any attention to in the past. As Louis said, if this is the most there is going on in this small town we should be grateful. But let us be careful how we think. A few weeks later at work on a peaceful Monday morning word was given to each department to be aware there was an unkempt strange man wandering throughout the store. A store shadow has been following him around. Exits were monitored. No one had seen him in town before, but perhaps he just had not been drawn to our attention for any particular reason. We just need to be alert. For the first time since I have been in this community I felt a little nervous. Could the big city life be touching our community too? Each day was the same for the remainder of the week. He just walked and walked around touching nothing, but visiting all the aisles ones by one. What did those dark blank eyes see? Better yet, what was he looking for?

Days went by and still no change. The quiet private gentleman walked the floors, both floor 1 and floor 2, from the time the store opened until closing. By now the employees all had an opinion as to who he was and why. Some thought he was a copy-cat Gentleman Stalker from the city, while some thought he was a copy-cat Lounge Lizard. Everyone had an opinion as to how much he could be trusted. The only thing they agreed on was that the ladies should be careful. They should be escorted home so as to not open any unwanted doors.

Chapter Thirteen

Outside the wind was blowing harder. The branches were swinging so hard some of them creaked as though they were about to break. Leaves were turned upside down. It looked as though a storm was brewing. I wonder if there is a storm brewing inside that distant man too. He seems unreachable. Everyday he wears an old tweed cap with orange and blue lines throughout. It appears to have pull down earflaps for the cooler days. He wears a well-worn dirty moss green shooting jacket that desperately needs cleaning or is it him? On his feet he wore a very old pair of combat boots laced up with twine that has been knotted several times. Everyone wondered if there were holes in the soles. If the number of steps that he has put on in Hibbard’s is any indication I am sure there are. Perhaps the home knit grey calf length wool socks kept his feet warm and sometimes dry, but how many holes has he worn in them. A floor manager recognized his ever so worn mitts as German Army surplus. His shoulder bag that was slung over his left shoulder was Army green canvas from the 1940s used for a gas mask. Today it held his worldly possessions. Had he or someone in his family served in the war? Did someone donate these to him? We will likely never know nor do we need to. No wonder he shuffles when he walks. He seems to walk on the outside of his right foot. Poor soul. Somehow I think there are many stories walking in those shoes. Wade came in today to observe our visitor as did an officer of the law. What is he up to? No one recognized him, but everyone in the community was now aware of his presence. Their curiosity has certainly perked up. Many came to see if they recognized this stranger to no avail. It seems he just floated in- thin air. It was but a week later that he left like he came. No one heard him, no one saw him. He just disappeared leaving not even a fluff of dust behind. That evening I began to reminisce of my time spent working in the art store. It was just a small store next to Hibbard’s. While I patiently waited to be on their staff full time I worked in the ever so little Art for Everyone store next door demonstrating supplies sold in Hibbard’s art department. It was an old shed made over into an antiquated store. An old easel that was not being used was set up for me. I illustrated how to use their supplies. While I used broken pencils and returned pastels customers

gathered around for ideas to use their odds and ends of supplies that were gathering dust at home. Most customers left with grab bags made up of odds of supplies. While these grab bags brought little income in, they did encourage future artists. Some bought them with their youngsters in mind. We felt it was a win situation all around. In turn the art department was slowly increasing in sales. My lunchtime was a part of my working day. I earned an extra dollar by working while I ate my spam sandwich with homemade relish and mustard. I had requested a bookshelf be added to one side of the room for books. Some were returns while others were books that had not sold. The price was right It was not too long before my full time job in the drapery department became available. I was now leaving the Art for Everyone store behind. The wife of a fellow employee was anxious to take over. She too had very little art experience, but was filled with enthusiasm. The little art store next door will continue to thrive. Oh my dear Bud. How I wish you could be here to see what beautiful adults our children have grown to be. I am so proud of them. You would be too. While Luella has not had many beaus, there is one that had been hanging around. His name is Frank. He is a very nice polite handsome young man. Rather on the tall side. He has always spoken very highly of his family. His father, mother and two younger sisters. Sunday family dinners together is very important in their house. Now I do wonder just how that will work if they should get serious. Perhaps I am getting ahead of myself. I do keep encouraging her to take her time before making any commitments. A few months later Luella excitedly told me how Frank had asked her to go to the Seven Seas House for a seafood dinner. Valentines day is getting closer. This particular Saturday was not a special day of any kind. It would just be an enjoyable evening out. I felt excited for her. She definitely needed a new dress for this special occasion, and so since I had picked up some fabric on a clearance at Hibbard’s I would make it for her. She

just needed to choose the pattern. As I am sure you can how I love to sew and Luella loves new clothes like all girls her age. I thought it is nice for her to have this special time out. I will even extend her curfew that I was not going to do until near the end of school. The next evening she was asking me what she should order. What kinds of Seafood will there be? Frank told her he thought they should have crab with hot melted butter for dipping. Now she was feeling both excited and nervous. Someone had told her to never order anything too expensive while on a date. Could that have been Auntie Hannah? Like I suspected, Auntie Hannah had told her that when she is not sure it would be a good idea to ask her date what he suggests and to you will always like it so be sure to try anything you can. It seemed that all this was yesterday, but time has moved on but not Frank. He has become a permanent fixture around here. I just knew he was going to be the one, and I am not disappointed. Tito is ecstatic. He says he loves having a brother. Before I forget I should also tell you my dear Bud, that I have been seeing a very nice gentleman during lunchtime, Louis Moore. We are just enjoying each others company while we eat, but Tito keeps saying that if Mr. Moore wishes to ask me to go out with him I should say yes. He keeps reminding me that he is sure you would agree. You would not want me to be lonely. Luella has been working very hard at her part time job at the bakery during her high school days. You would be so proud. Her marks at school are very good. Her cake decorations have taken off. Everyone thinks so highly of her creations. “You seem to have been seeing Frank a lot lately,” I said to Luella. “Does this mean you wish to give him a small gift while you are enjoying this special dinner?” “No, I am not even considering it.” said Luella. “Besides I don’t think there is any reason he will be giving me anything other than this elegant dinner. Actually Mom, I am not with Frank that much. I am at Mary’s a lot as she is trying to plan her wedding. It is going to be a garden affair at her parents place. They have a lovely yard and home. I am sure it will be beautiful.

Like I mentioned to you before Mom, she wants me to stand up for her. I can wear any dress that you choose to make for me in any colour. She is not fussy, but I do think I should decide ahead and let her know.” “Yes you should. That would be the polite thing to do,” I said. You know Bud, being alone can be difficult. Sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly bear it. Company would be nice. Do that no one will ever replace you. The next day Louis picked me up after work. He wanted to go to the Rascal diner for dinner. Any time I have worked all day I am more than willing to go out for dinner. Everything was the same as always. The usual crowd filled the tables with delicious foods and chatter. It sounded as though there were twice as many patrons as there were. It is such a homey feeling when you enter. There are so many people either saying hello or waving their greetings. Today the special had to be fried chicken. Yummm. As soon as there was a quiet break Mr. Cook came to our table wearing a forced smile. We both could see the worry on his friendly face. I did not need to ask but did anyway. Just in case. “Do you have any news at all?” I asked quietly so as to not have anyone overhear. “No there is not a thing. I am still keeping her room available should she return. It is hard to be thinking of the worst and wishing for the best day after day.” “What is the latest with Curtis and his brothers?” asked Louis. “As far as I know Curtis is still serving time, but that will soon end. As for his brothers I have no idea anymore just where they are, but my feeling is they are hiding in a hut somewhere not far away. Now I must determine just what they have done with Sally. It is like a puzzle I cannot solve for some reason. I feel certain those scumbags have her somewhere close by. Very possibly somewhere not too far away just to taunt me. They would love to flaunt it in my face that I could not see her. I thought she would be

safer near me, but I have let her down.” “Clifford. May I call you Clifford?” asked Louis. “Yes of course. You both may.” “Sorry to interrupt your thoughts dear, but if I am to be Wanda’s friend so it is best that I make it a habit to call you Mr. Cook,” I said. “That is a good idea Anna,” said Louis. “Let us not let our guard down. One of these days someone will make a slip. Let it not be one of us. It is long past time that this community steps up and takes some action. I will get permission from Officer Julian to quietly set up a search party of the area. If nothing shows up we can expand our area. First we need to be sure the law is on our side. We must also stress that no one takes the law into their own hands. We just want to bring Wanda back. What do you think Clifford?” “Louis. I am overcome with thankfulness. Perhaps I should have spread the word early on instead of keeping this a family secret. Actually I can not even think of where to start,” said Clifford Cook with a quiet voice that was beginning to break. “I will be in touch as soon as I have something in place,” said Louis. You just keep cooking. With a forced smile Mr. Cook again expressed his appreciation. “Dinner is on me!” “Thank you,” said Louis “but I will pay for us. Please give a dinner to someone who cannot afford a dinner out at your fine establishment. The food is superb.” A few days later the word was out. Posters were placed around town that their favourite waitress needed their help to come home. Within days stories were coming in. There were unbelievable stories of Curtis and his brothers. Everyone was angry and eager to bring them to justice. He has hurt so many people, but somehow has managed to keep it quiet and to remain away from the law, but no longer. That evening Louis made a phone call to Gus. Tomorrow Gus will visit Officer Julian. He has an old story to tell.

That night I retired feeling there was going to be an end to this mystery. She must be somewhere. It breaks my heart to try to imagine just how much she has been hurt. It also does seem a little strange to me that when we are with Vance and Stella there is not a word spoken of Wanda’s disappearance. The occasion of another big moment was drawing closer to when Tito and Glenda would be married. Louis and I had spent some time with her family here and there getting to know them. Just as we have fallen in love with Glenda so they have drawn to Tito. Luella and Frank were also feeling as though they were becoming a part of another big family. Our extended family was growing in leaps and bounds. It seems like yesterday that there was just Tito, Luella and myself against the world. I think when summer comes Louis and I should host a big summer celebration. We could call it the Full Deck Picnic. Our yard is large enough to set up for a picnic of families congregating as they reminisce of times past. Excited children can run around while their parents visit with each other. We could make it an annual event. Sometimes I really love my ideas. Not only our family but that of other families in our neck of the woods were drawing closer together. It seemed that everyone was leaning on the other for . Still there were those sad thoughts creeping into everyone’s mind. Wanda was the center of those depressing thoughts. Will this ever end? A few weeks later a stranger and his dog came wheeling into town looking for Officer Julian. His story was that he was just ing by when Rio became antsy. He was barking incessantly. Apparently he was always too happy to lie on the front seat and nap to the hum of the truck. This time as they neared The Wild Rose area he stood up changing from his barking to whining and pawing at the window. His pitch became more of a long high-pitched cry as he frantically pawed at the window. He wanted out. But why? The knowledge of our missing Wanda was unknown to them. Amos and Rio were just ing through on their way to visit a sickly relative. Following his chat with Officer Julian he suggested he would stop in the same area tomorrow just before lunch. If they could bring something for Rio to have a sniff perhaps it may help. He is not a trained dog, but seems to have an ability to sniff something out at times. It wouldn’t hurt to try.

Rio looks like a mangy mutt that sleeps outside in the bushes that Amos says he does. Amos says that he comes to the door when it is time for him to get up. There is definitely a great bond and trust between the two. Amos too looks rather bedraggled. He wore a very large pair of well-worn overalls over his plaid shirt that was tattered at the sleeves and collar. Old Red, as he called his truck sounded like it was on it last legs. It sported many dents here and there. When Officer Julian asked him when he rolled it Amos gave him a big proud smile. “How did you know I rolled her?” “Well it does have a few bumps and seems to be missing some paint.” “She is still looking good though,” said Amos with a huge toothless smile. “Why do you call it Old Red?” asked Officer Julian. “As you can see she still has some of the red paint on her. The rest is paint that I have at home. Keeps her from going rusty, don’t you think?” Nodding his head in agreement he turned to leave. “Will look for you in the morning. Thanks for your help. Appreciate it.” With that he turned and walked back to his cruiser smiling to himself. Amos may be a little different but he does seem to have a good heart. As he closed his door behind him all he could see was a cloud of dust as Amos and Rio took off down the road. Next morning Officer Julian and two others met at the Wild Rose Bush area to find that Amos and Rio were already there and waiting. Rio was jumping and running in circles anxious to get started. “Morning! Seems like Rio is rather anxious this morning.” “Sure is. I told him what he has to do so now he wants to get started. Like that about him,” said Amos showing his toothless smile. After letting Rio sniff Wanda’s favourite sweater he put his nose to the ground before taking off in a hurry. It was a while before he came tearing back to Amos giving their code that he needed Amos to follow him. Everyone took off trying to keep up when finally he stopped to sniff around. This time Amos tied a long piece of binder twine to his collar giving Rio

instructions to wait for him. Those two seemed to speak the same language. At least they understood each other. After trudging this way and that through the trees for a couple hours we decided that it best to just call it a day. As we neared our starting point Rio became excited once again. Had they circled around to throw searchers off? In the end there was no sign of anyone being there. Our hopes were deflated. The many posters were not bringing in any tips. The few ideas proved fruitless. Time to expand to other towns. Now it is in the hands of Officer Julian and Louis, the lead civilian headhunter. Their determination was rising. The weeks dragged on when finally they had a break. Their hearts began to soar. It was just what they were hoping for. Louis and I were asked to travel to Fernie, B.C. to check out a sighting. I would be able to recognize her, I hope so, even with some attempts at changing her appearance. With Fernie being in the Elk Valley area it was a lovely drive even though our thoughts were on the difficult time ahead. Fernie was very much a tourist attraction. It hosted beautiful skiing with an inviting lodge to attract everyone of every age. Very charming. It is Elk Valley’s playground. The drive was both peaceful and beautiful. I loved the scenery. If only there was not so much stress behind it. The wild grasses along the roadside, the healthy green trees lazily swaying to the rhythm of the flow of traffic along the highway. The sun was peeking out from behind the clouds showing off the most amazing mountains in the background. As we drove through this new to me quiet town I found myself relaxing. Life appeared to be moving in slow motion. There were elderly people sitting on their wicker rockers. Some on wooden porch swings in a variety of designs and colours. Little boys were tumbling on the grass with their puppies licking their faces as they showed how much they enjoyed this special time. This town vibrated with friendship and friendliness. Now it was time for the search to begin. We began to investigate by showing our posters in hopes of someone leading us to Wanda. We had nearly made the rounds with one more place to visit. A small drycleaners on the edge of town was left. Something told me this was not the kind of

business Wanda would venture into. It was in need of a new coat of paint on the outside. The sidewalk needed a good sweeping. The windows did not appear to have been washed for many a moon. But then, perhaps if one is hiding it just might be the place. As we entered we both noticed how clean it was although it was stifling hot with no outside air or fans in sight. An older gentleman was bending down behind the counter retrieving something from an unknown package. “Hello,” said Louis. I immediately thought how he does not seem the least bit intimidating, just friendly. The man’s eyes immediately went to the poster. Suddenly nervousness was all over him. His voice shook when he attempted to welcome us. We both knew we had found our spot. This is Wanda’s hiding spot. Now I just need to see her so I can speak to her. Louis quietly said how I was this lady’s friend and was trying to locate her. Now we both wished we would have had a regular picture. One that was not so intimidating. Too late for that now. We will just have to work with it and hope for the best. I decided to plead for my friend. I explained how she has not been away for this long without ing me. “Please help me locate her. If she is here I would just like to speak with her. Then if for whatever reason she wishes to break our I will respect her wishes.” “No. I am sorry. I cannot help you. Please leave.” His voice began to tremble a little more by the second. “Please ask her to me. This is my name and number.” With that I turned and left but not before he saw the tears in my eyes. They were real tears. They were from my heart. As Louis reached to open the door for me we both caught a glimpse in the window. It was not much more than a quick reflection moving in the back. The lady I saw had pitch black hair full of curls, but she had the same round shoulders that Wanda had. I quickly pretended that I was going to say something, but changed my mind and left.

In a low whisper Louis said we will talk when we are out of town. As difficult as it was I did not disagree. Something in my bones told me it was Wanda. We had found her at last. Now we need to gain her trust before she runs again. Without another word we climbed into the black sleek car Louis had rented. Slowly he drove out of town for just a short way. Having a good sense of direction he circled around to where we had a filtered view of both the front and back entrance. I was unaware that he had surveyed these huge oak trees when we drove in thinking they just may be what we need to conceal our whereabouts. We patiently stalled for another two long hours feigning sleep. People walked by taking a look at us, but with our eyes barely open they quickly turned away leaving us to rest. Finally I spotted Wanda leaving by the rear door. Before Louis could say no I was out and running. As I neared she sensed there was someone behind her. For a quick moment it appeared that she was not sure if she should run or not. In the end she stopped. Then she slowly walked towards me with tears streaming down her eyes. In seconds she was sobbing. I had no idea what to say so I just held her in my arms. It was a few minutes of holding onto a stiff body before she returned my embrace. “Oh Wanda. I am so glad to have found you. I could not go on much longer not knowing where you are. Are you alright?” “Yes, I think so. Thank you for caring about me. How is my brother?” “If you can be alright worrying yourself sick over the loss of someone that is very special, then I would say he is fine. He wants you to come home so he can see you each and every day. Mr. Cook loves you more than you can imagine. You know, blood is much thicker than water. Oh Wanda. I have been so frightened.” “Anna. I have needed to have my friend by my side, but it was much too worrisome. My story is much too long and frightful to share with you right now.” “Then how about you settle with your boss so that we can give you a ride home. It will be no trouble and we are going that way any ol’ how. We will have all this time for you to tell your story, and for me to listen to my friend. What do you

think?” For the next while all was quiet. Louis and I both sat as still as we could so as to not disturb a single thought going through her mind. Finally I felt her hand on top of mine. It was ice cold and shivering. What must be going through her mind to shake one up so much? A few days later Louis told me he could see her face in the mirror. It was set with a determination that only a strong willed person could have. Her jaw was quivering. Her forehead creased. What must she have been thinking of doing? And what has she been through. Finally Louis spoke. “Tell you what Wanda. How about the three of us go for supper and perhaps we can help you with your next step. Then we can locate a pay phone so you can call your brother. I have a pocket full of change that needs to be spent.” With that there was the beginnings of a smile creeping back onto her face. As we quietly stepped into the Local Diner just around the corner several heads turned. “They must think Louis and I are new around here. Small town news.” With that Wanda smiled as I led us to a corner booth. Louis said he took in the orders on the tables as we walked by coming to the conclusion that it looked as though chicken potpie was the hot number this evening. Typically he noticed the lemon pie was worth drooling over. A must have. That brought out a real smile from Wanda and I. We would have pie tonight. Pie with mile high meringue. When our orders were placed with a pot of hot coffee to share Wanda sat up a little straighter. “What do you want me to tell you?” she asked sounding a little more like her old self even though she was shaking. “Well how about you start from the beginning. From the moment this all began. Then should you need to tell your story again it will not be so hard to tell. You will have let it out once. Just we are your friends. We are on your side ready to help you,” I said. “One more thing Wanda. Please do not run from us.” “I will not. Guess I should phone my brother tonight. I want to be sure he still would like me to return after all the trouble I have been for him.” “Oh Wanda. There is no doubt he wants you to return. Everyone in town is looking for you. They are looking forward to your return home as well as to the

Diner.” The next morning the three of us set out for home with a little more contented enger. I can understand her saying that it will be so hard to face the people she has always considered to be friendly acquaintances. This next while will be tough as well, but with things being out in the open it will become easier. As for people’s curiosity that too will die down as their interest quickly moves on to some other revelation. After we were driving for about a half hour Wanda said she would like to tell us her story. “Guess I really feel a need to rehearse my time away since I will need to go over it with Officer Julian. I have definitely decided to press charges against Curtis, and Henry but most of all against Leroy. He is downright vicious with a malicious streak in his every bone. I heard him say so many times how he would just like to cut me open.” With that said tears began to roll down her cheeks and rightly so. “You will be asked to tell your story from the very beginning to the day we found you. You can practice on us. We will neither judge you nor criticize you. We are your friends,” said Louis. “Thank you. I am ever so grateful to you both so here goes. From now on I shall take that brave step forward. I came home from work a few days later and walked into the kitchen like I always have done with no idea there was any kind of trouble waiting for me until I heard a stifled sneeze from my bedroom. I froze. Before I could make a move to get out Leroy was behind me with my arms crossed and twisted. In his right hand he had his knife that he never leaves home without. The pointed end was pinned to my throat. One false move and he said he would use it. He was always eager for a reason to draw blood. When we reached his car Henry was waiting. They threw me on the floor in the back onto my stomach and hog-tied me after having taped my mouth closed so I could not make a sound, but I could hear. I knew there was no point in trying to fight so I thought I would try my best to be quiet and relax so I could remain alert. They never spoke for what seemed like hours and hours. Slowly and quietly I managed to get my head turned so I could determine the light of day. By this time I had forgotten just where all I hurt

or rather where I did not hurt. Finally they stopped. I knew it was at a service station by the smell of gasoline and oil. They both got out returning in record time. My hope was that someone would be suspicious as to why they were in such a hurry. With having a black cover thrown over me there was little chance of being seen. As we drove away I could hear bags being torn open letting the smell of potato chips waft throughout the vehicle. I could tell they were also chewing away on something else because they both chew with their mouths wide open. They sound like a couple cows chewing on their cuds only cows do not spit while they chew. Perhaps it is beef Jerky, Henry’s favourite. Just thinking about it made my stomach give off some silent growls that hopefully only I could hear. This old dilapidated junker made so much noise as it chugged along one had to speak loudly to be heard. This had both advantages and disadvantages. We drove and we drove some more travelling over rougher terrain than earlier which told me we had left the main road and were now heading into the bushes farther and farther. At times I could hear the sound of branches brushing along the side of the vehicle. I know there are some huts and a lean-to here and there among the tall trees that were unseen from the roadways. I could not believe that Henry never once spoke all the way here. Henry loves to hear himself talk mostly of all the nasty things he will one day do. Always reminding everyone that him and Leroy are a team just like Dad and you know who. With that feeble brain of his he has never once accidentally mentioned who you know who is. In other words he can actually keep his mouth shut, but now I wonder just how Leroy has threatened him. There is nothing I would not put past Leroy. My bones were starting to feel like that of a ninety year old from bouncing along the rough ground that never seems to end. Leroy does not believe in slowing for the potholes, perhaps because it usually makes Henry laugh when his head hits the ceiling. Today there is no comment. After what seemed to be a long, long drive the vehicle suddenly came to an abrupt halt rolling me against the back of the front seat. It was now pitch black out without so much as a sound from the nightlife living in the bush. They left me lying there in the dark without any idea of just what their plans

were. I knew I was not going to like it. Eventually they came back dragging me out of the vehicle by my ankles as my bare stomach slowly slid painfully along. I felt like all the skin had been striped away. They then pulled me by my hair until I was standing up. The pain was dreadful, but I would not let them hear my cry. Once inside they dragged me across the smelly room. It was musty, and damp along with the stench of mouse droppings. My stomach began to roll. With all my might I kept it down because I knew if I did not they would make me lick it up just like before. Suddenly I was thrown onto a lumpy smelly cot and told to lie in the middle. I will have to keep them both warm. I knew from before what that entailed. In my mind I was calling them filthy pigs that were not fit to live on this earth. I wanted my oldest brother more than I ever had. That night I never slept. Once they were finished taking their turns with me I thought I would, but not to be. I cried so much from both the pain inflicted on me as well as the humiliation. I was thankful for the dark night with not a star to be seen lest they see my tears. It was beginning to get light out when the pigs woke up. I did not know I could hate anyone so much. They were not fit to be called humans. They are a disgrace to God. I spent the following two days tied to the bed. Tape was removed quickly and painfully from my mouth once each day for me to eat some slop that Henry called porridge. I am too afraid to think of what he used, but I managed to keep it down. The third day it was back in the vehicle for another unnerving ride to parts unknown. This night we stopped near a running creek. I could hear the water gently rolling along. I thought there was a chance it would bring me sleep. Once again that was just wishful thinking. This hut was a little warmer. Again it was pitch black out when we arrived. Before going through the rickety door I heard the Owls hooting to each other. They were being very boisterous so I knew it was just shortly after the sun had

set. This is the time of night when owls tend to hoot so ferociously to say that they are fending off intruders. Perhaps my rescuers will hear this call, and come to investigate the reason for their high-spirited hooting. They both smelled of stale home brew accompanied with the strong odour of cigars. I wonder where they managed to lift them. Do hope they did not roll anyone tonight. I know this gives Henry a high just thinking about it. Not being a big strong man he feels power when he can bully a smaller or not so ablebodied homeless person. Every night they took their turn abusing me while I thought of the day when I will see their sorry bodies hanging by a big rope in the middle of town. That is still too kind. I some place we lived while I was small that on the outskirts of our village there was a large noose hanging from a strong frame with a drop floor below. Somehow it was activated, but never did I think I would wish to see it happen. There were some rickety slab bleachers across the front for those wishing to watch someone die in this terrible way. It was always said that he had done some dastardly thing and did not deserve to live. He was not safe for the rest of society to be around. He was determined to have no soul as he neither cared nor felt any remorse for his actions. Henry and Leroy fit this bill. Young boys would tell each other stories as to how it would be to be hung each one trying to outdo the other in hopes of scaring the younger ones. While I thought hanging was too good for them, I really am not so sure that when the moment came I would wish that on even them. I do believe that the best and strongest punishment will come from God. My mother always said we must let Him judgement. It seemed that each day was the same as the last. Each night was getting colder and colder as the ground froze for the winter. Snow was covering the frosty ground. I could not see it, but I did know what it sounded like. The big fluffy flakes were landing so softly. When Henry and Leroy opened the door to go out or come in I could hear the crunch below their boots along with the feel of the cold air rushing inside.

Some mornings I woke to a hut that sounded like each board was motionless. Soon it creaked and creaked as their heavy steps broke its silence. I had thoughts of how I would never wake from my cold night. Would my brother one day find my body as hard as ice and all alone? Finally I decided to not fight for a couple days. I would neither be compliant or defiant. Then I will fight for all I am worth. I just need some strength along with some help from God or whoever may come along. I needed to hone my listening skills to determine where things lay so I can get a heads up. But could I overtake either one of them in my weakened state? No! Think Sally, think! There must be something I can do to help myself survive.” Now and again it would be quiet with not a sound coming from Sally. Louis and I decided that we would not disturb her. If she wished to nap for a while we would remain noiseless. I would take advantage of these moments to enjoy a catnap too. “Sorry, I fell asleep. I have gotten used to having an afternoon catnap when it is my coffee time. I wonder if ever I will be back to myself again. Anyway I am so fortunate to have been helped by Mr. and Mrs. Green. They have become like parents to me.” “How did this fortunate meeting come about?” I asked. “I do not know just how long it was before I managed to free myself. With so little energy I could not struggle too long until I would out. I wiggled and wiggled until I got my hands free. Mind you I removed some skin in the process. Then I began to work on my ankles. I must have injured my left ankle when I stumbled the night they brought me here because it and my foot were black and blue as well as swollen. I searched for something to eat but found nothing. Then I went outside in search of berries. I was always in fear of them returning to find I was loose, but after a couple days I stopped worrying about it. If they find me they will likely just kill me anyway so I had to try. After wandering around in the bush for a couple days with sleeping under a tree I began to smell the fragrance of Wild Roses. Now I sort of knew just where I was. The closer I got the fresher the scent. I needed to get to the beautiful Wild Rose Bushes. Then I can make my way to the road.

A couple days later I heard the sound of a vehicle as I stumbled through the rough landscape. As I floundered along in my dizzy state I knew I needed water. I had not had anything to drink since they took me. Maybe there will be help coming soon. Before I got to the road I fell as I sensed my eyes rolling back into my head. I could feel myself getting light headed and weak with the sensation of everything spinning. Then suddenly my world went black. Mr. Green said he would never have seen me if it had not been for the wife travelling with him that day. She had said she needed a little time away from the house and the shop. Since the weather was nice out it would make for a relaxing day. Mrs. Green loves the wild roses and usually requests that he stop to let her get out for a couple minutes. When she was bent forward smelling her favourite flower she fortunately spied something lying on the ground beneath a bush just as short distance away. Mr. Green said he was standing beside their car enjoying a cigarette when he heard his Mrs. screaming like a banshee. Whatever could be wrong he thought. Finding his Mrs. on her knees trying desperately to wake me he too began to shake. He said they have never had such an experience in this quiet rural community. Who was I and where did I come from? Lucky for me two of the sweetest people found me. They told me how they found me looking like a mere skeleton of a lady wearing only rags that covered some of my body that showed scratches from the rose bushes as well as that of the brush as I stumbled finding my way out. There were bruises all over me. Some black and blue and some yellow and green. My one eye was nearly swollen shut. Mr. Green said he had never seen the likes of it. They brought me back to their place. Taking care of me could not have been done by anyone more sensitive. Mrs. Green gave me a clean dress with small flowers in a bright blue. It had not been picked up by the owner for a year. She sewed me new underclothes that felt so soft and clean. I shall never forget my first bath in their tub that to me seemed like the biggest one in the world. Mrs. Green insisted I soak in her pretty bubbles until the water was cold. She gently washed and brushed my hair even though it took the

longest time to remove the burs and tangles. My feet were too swollen and cut up to even think of shoes so I was given a pair of warm socks to wear. The following day an officer of the law arrived to speak with me. He was an older man sporting that well-fed look. His hair was beginning to gray. I do not his name, but I shall always his soft caring voice. He was the grandfather that I wished I had. In a moment I felt myself letting my head rest against his shoulder as he held me up in a sitting position so I could lean on him while he softly spoke to me asking me ever so many questions all the while reassuring me no one will ever again hurt me. I began to look forward to his visits. For the next week I could not my name. I insisted it was Sally while they said there was a missing person by the name of Wanda. That is not me I kept maintaining. With them tenderly caring for me I began to get myself together, but still had doubts about this Wanda person. Was she an impersonator? I was beginning to know enough that I needed to help out for my keep. Little by little I began to do small jobs around the shop, but I only went when Mrs. Green was there. I felt safe with her. Gradually she drew me into sharing what I could which I insisted was very little. Each day it seemed that a small amount more came back to me, but I only shared the same things over and over. Then she showed me the Lost Person poster. Yes, it was me. The shock seemed to refresh more and more things in my mind.

I kept the things I ed that I was not ready to share locked inside me as I was not ready to face Henry and Leroy. Curtis neither. So I remained as quiet as possible at times making out that I had no idea what Mrs. Green was talking about. For me this was my mechanism. I needed to protect myself. This was the only way I thought I could survive, at least for the time being. Will there ever be a time when I will be brave enough to the world as I knew it before Curtis came into my life? I have no idea how long I have been staying with Mr. and Mrs. Green. From one day to the next seemed all the same. There was no beginning and no end to each day except for going to bed, but napping in the daytime confused me. Sometimes I thought another day had come. Would this be the day someone would come looking for me? It was your voice Anna that I recognized, but was actually thinking you were my cousin. When Mr. Green said you were my friend from the Diner it triggered something in my dazed brain. Things began to come to me at lightning speed. I was ing things faster than I could put it all together. I ed the Diner, my brother and you Anna. After talking with Mr. and Mrs. Green about the Diner, I tried my best to answer their questions. My dreams were always the same. It seems I shall never get Henry or Leroy out of my mind. At least not out of my dreams. Mrs. Green told me they are more like nightmares. I had no idea just what she was speaking of. So I asked just what is a nightmare. “A nightmare is a disturbing dream that can be caused by many things, but usually unpleasant or terrifying experiences. Were you having any of these things?” asked Mrs. Green. “Yes, I was terrified all the time. They are my brothers-in-laws but I know they hurt me. They always try to put fear into me so I will comply with their ugly wishes. I know they have put the fear of the devil in others as well. They have also hurt people. I know that because I have heard them bragging to each other about it. Henry especially. He is too stupid to keep his mouth shut. At night when they came in super drunk I knew they were going to go after me

so I tried to play dead just as though a wild animal was after me. I barely dared to breath. Will I out from not enough air I wondered. Whenever they turned towards me I held my breath until I no longer could for fear of letting it all out in one big puff. I very slowly let the air seep out between my lips until I held no more. Then I began to draw in air once again as gently as I could without letting my chest move. By the time they went outside I felt as though I would either explode or crumble from the pressure. In the next couple days I perfected it so well they thought I was beginning to draw my last breaths so they may as well just leave me to die on my own. The rats will feed off me they were bragging. I had to survive. Suddenly my will to live was becoming so strong I could smell the fresh outdoor air. The scent of wild roses was becoming stronger each day. The kind grandfatherly officer had visited me so often that I began to feel that he was just that. He was a friend that I was beginning to trust a little more each day. I found myself conveying to him some of the things that I heard Leroy and Henry saying, especially Henry. They were boasting about how they strung up this fellow from a big oak tree using his belt and the rope hanging on the side of his saddle. Too bad his dog and horse took off when he began yelling for help they said as they laughed. No remorse with them only annoyance that his horse and dog got away. They also talked of the women they raped especially the young girls and the old lady. Their talk was so filthy I could not repeat it, and so the kind officer never asked me to. It made me sick to think of it. Maybe one day they will hang from their you know whats I thought. Louis said the best phone call he ever made was to Clifford who was so overcome with gratefulness and emotion he could not speak. We were to take her to the Sleepy Hollow Inn where he would be waiting for Sally at the back door that was reserved for deliveries. He said he had a room waiting for them where she would be safe. Several days later I visited Wanda where she was recovering in the local hospital. They wanted to keep her there for another day until they had all their test results in. The nurses called her their miracle angel. They relayed to me the

sight they saw upon her arrival, one of disbelief. She was a walking beaten up skeleton of a lady. We all wanted to take turns caring for her during the night shift so she would never be alone just in case her nightmares came to visit. Worse yet should her captors come looking for her we would be there to raise the alarm. After a couple nights they said she would drift off to a peaceful sleep with a smile for her nurses. A special bond was forming. It seems that after her stay in the hospital Wanda was rested and willing to share everything of each day so we all let her speak as much as she wished. “When I walked into my home however many days later with Clifford beside me,” Wanda said,” there were tears of gratefulness rolling down my cheeks. I was overwhelmed with love for my brother. I never knew just how much we meant to each other. As he held me close I sobbed and sobbed until I was all out of tears. Then it turned into a fierce hug along with tears of relief and joy. Wanda is back I knew. Thanks to so many friends and those I never knew I had. How will I ever be able to thank everyone, especially you Anna and Louis? I know there is still a lot of harsh time to overcome, but I will make it just like Louis said I would. Tomorrow I want to begin the process of having Curtis, and his two brothers charged. Not just for what they have done to me, but also to others. Just thinking of it makes me wish the noose was still there. Hanging is too good for those scoundrels.” With a heavy heart Louis and I both went to work the following day. He was meeting with Gus later in the afternoon. Then Officer Julian will be dropping by for a coffee to get our side of the story. I thought when Wanda was found I would be able to sleep restfully, but really have my doubts about tonight once again. Tomorrow Wanda and Clifford will be living in a new place, together. As much as Clifford would like it to be kept quiet there is no such thing in a small town. You might just as well paint your names on a neon sign at the front of the building. News will spread like a whirlwind. While your privacy is taken the help from the community will come tenfold, and they both know it.

Louis and I can begin to get back to our life while it will be some time before Clifford and Wanda will. The inside of the Diner boasted many posters of welcome and love to Wanda, we miss and need our special waitress etc. While we were happy to be able to help a friend, we were also happy to be able to be with our family once again. A big relief washed over us to know just how well and happy they were.

Chapter Fourteen

A year later . . .

A year has ed by with so much to change life in this community. Some has changed for the better, and some reminding us of the horrors that have struck two favourite hard working people. It seems that it has changed everyone. New neighbours are not so openly automatically accepted as being kind and trustworthy. Some people are more sceptical than others. Soon we will be hosting our annual Full Deck Picnic with hopes of bringing the community together once again. New residents will be cordially invited just as though they have always lived here among us. We are trusting that no one will bring up the subject of Curtis, Henry or Leroy. Louis said he will be putting those that may be loose tongued wise ahead of time. There is only one lady that we know of, that has openly told Wanda that the problem goes two ways. What did you do to him to make him treat you like that Wanda was asked. Clifford too will be on a sharp lookout we are sure. Clifford has told Louis that he knows where the three are spending their time. It is a very small town with not a bush in sight by where they can hide. Everyone knows everyone. There are numerous residents that are lumberjacks so we will see who will be taking the lead roll. Leroy is suddenly becoming very meek. Leroy has already had words with one, his next-door neighbour setting them straight as to who runs this town, and it will not be him or his brother. As for Curtis, he is in a halfway house where he is awaiting his next court appearance for crimes that have surfaced due to his abuse to his wife and sons. He can thank Gus for this. Slowly Gus has become a hero in his quiet way living an honest life, but one that he should have come clean about years ago. Sometimes when we do not wish to be involved we all of a sudden find we are withholding valuable information. Like it or not we are then involved. Many prisoners serving time are eventually nearing the end of their sentences. Now they will learn necessary skills to re-integrate into society. There is a curfew with which they must abide by. Many need to learn to better and care for themselves.

Most prisoners can see the end of their sentences, but not Curtis. He is awaiting another. Curfew time does not apply to him as he is not allowed out without a guard at his side, and that is only for emergency situations and not of his own choosing. There are rules that must be followed. Curtis has never liked rules. The prisoners need to pay for their keep. Since Curtis is not allowed out he spends his time from sun up to sun down working on the compound, usually in the kitchen washing dishes and cleaning up. These are chores that he has always detested. Leaving a halfway house can land you in prison as the felony charge is the same as trying to escape, or successfully escaping from prison. Wanda keeps saying that it is unbelievable that she is married to a felon. Finally she is accepting the fact that it is not her fault. He hog washed her. To feel that your ex-husband will always have a criminal background is devastating. It is a nasty stigma that will always be there with a portion rubbing off onto you. Wanda had at first wanted to move somewhere where no one knew of her life, but big brother talked her out of it. As he said she would always be looking over her shoulder. No one can run forever without it catching up to you, he told her. Together we will face your demons so you will be able to move on.

We suddenly found ourselves having the beautiful stretch of that warm calm weather we were waiting for. Just perfect for an outdoor picnic. With no rain in sight we thought it best to put out the invitations before natures meanest little friends with the large sharp teeth come out to play. They are not too friendly. Always hungry. Actually they don’t have teeth, they have long tongues that do the trick for them. Mosquitoes are the same as flies. With no teeth they have 47 sharp edges like teeth in their tongue. Bites from a mosquito is more dangerous than any other animal. Putting that thought behind us, we dwelt on the perfect day ahead. Once again it seemed that everyone in the community came. The morning sky was clear with a calm breeze leaving a fresh aroma behind. All kinds of chairs were brought. Each guest carried their own dishes and cutlery in a tote bag of sorts. Most were home made with a drawstring top to prevent their cutlery from falling out. Dishes were taken home, at their insistence last year, to be washed. Wanda and big brother came with a picnic basket loaded with savoury scents wafting throughout the yard. There was everything one could imagine from cold meats to salads to desserts. If any food was left in their pots, I requested they take that home too. Somehow there was enough left in our refrigerator for several days. Wanda had such a good time, at least after she began to relax, that they stayed until the end. She wanted to share with us some of the comments they received from others. The most important one was from a couple by the name of Helen and Herbert. Herbert and Clifford had known each other for many years, but with the Diner there was not much time left over for socializing. Since Helen and Wanda quickly were becoming good friends perhaps that will change a little. Now Wanda will have someone besides me to share bits of life with. They seemed to spend much of the evening laughing which is ever so good for Wanda. Even Louis noticed it. Our three and their spouses were no longer living in this community, but were within a three-hour drive. With babies on the way it was a little too far for my liking, but they needed to be where the work was. Stella’s oldest is now two. No matter who he sees Theo looks up with big pleading dark brown eyes, ‘I wanna

wabbit gammie’. So I have requested Hibbard’s to bring in a stuffed wabbit for the next occasion. Isn’t that what grandmothers are supposed to do? Louis had been suggesting that I retire completely from my job with Hibbard’s and do something else. The conversation always drifted to my crafty talent. “You enjoy that so much I think it is time for you to do the things you really have fun with,” he would say. Each time I was a little more convinced that I would, but the usual played on my mind. What would I do with it all? Louis and the girls all think I could sell them but to whom? The Art for Everyone store next to Hibbard’s was empty. I could set up my store there at no charge. The outside was beginning to look like it had been trashed. We could fix it up both outside and inside said Louis. With the number of requests to make bouquets for weddings that alone would be worthwhile. Due to not getting fresh flowers to our community at a reasonable price, bride’s were choosing the silk artificial flowers. After seriously thinking this through, I thought why do I not look into some kind of deal with Hibbard’s for ordering my flowers via their store. Since delivery day would always be on a Tuesday between ten and one I could be there to receive them, take my order next door and put them away ready for use. I was quickly becoming excited. Louis conveyed how he would redo the inside to make it more workable for me. I could give the outside a coat of paint. Now what colour? It will work, will it not? Following a couple more days of pondering I decided I should do it. This opportunity may never present itself again. That evening I asked Louis how much some sky-blue paint would cost? “Let me see. Would that have anything to do with the little hut? If it does I know just where to get it. The price is perfect for you, my dear. I am so happy to know that you are willing to step out into this venture. I am sure it will be a success, what with your talent and pretty smile you will have all the customers you wish. That night I was so excited I could not sleep. In my mind’s eye I painted the outside a pretty blue. Then in spring colours with a larger brush I painted a floral bouquet with smaller flowers displayed in the smaller areas. There were flowers and more flowers everywhere in every colour.

The door sported a welcome banner with my name on it as well as the days and hours of business. When I woke in the morning I could vividly visualize the little hut, and it would be mine with my customers coming and going. Soon all the ladies for miles around would know my name. There would be the beautiful perfumes of flowers especially that of a wild rose bush wafting through the air. Who knew there were floral scents in a spray can. While Louis and I had breakfast together in our designed for us dream kitchen I relayed to him my aspiration spreading a wide smile across his handsome face. “Are you going to be home today?” he asked me after patiently listening to me. “No. I plan to go to the hut to clean it up. It needs a fresh scrubbing inside and a good sweeping outside, but that will take me most of the day.” “Perhaps I shall stop by and see how my pretty scrub lady is doing. If there is anything high leave it for me. I can take a few minutes from my day to help out. I do not want you falling off a ladder.” As I walked the short distance on the familiar route carrying my scrub bucket and broom I noticed a few eyes secretly peering out from behind a curtain. That is good I thought. Curiosity is sure to get the better of them. It was nearly noon when Louis arrived carrying paint cans, brushes, wipes and a can of paint thinner. Probably more like a paint remover. I had managed to improve my painting expertise on the house. Along with all of this was a new lock and key for the door. Then lastly out came a bag that smelled like a delicious lunch. While we ate we sat on the outdoor bench to warm ourselves in the beautiful orange rays of sunshine. The first thing I did upon my arrival was to sweep out the hut and then the benches outside. Somehow I just knew this would be my resting spot. Well, at least until the weatherman changed to bringing the cold air along. It was nearing a week by the time I felt my shop was ready for customers to view. My last task had been to sew tie back curtains for the two windows to give it that homey look. Now it was inviting.

Our three and spouses went together to give me a welcome mat. It was so pretty! It was a sand colour with a bouquet of spring flowers to one side. Next to it read the words, WELCOME TO MY HUT. The black border framing it set it off perfectly. In the bottom right corner in smaller script was my name. It belonged only to me. Wednesday will be my big opening day. Flyers were handed out after church service. As well there were flyers on the counters throughout Hibbard’s in a smaller size should anyone wish to take one home with them as well as to display in shop windows. There were larger posted both inside and outside of the Rascal Rally Diner. Now I am becoming nervous. What if no one stops by this week? Wednesday came with the sun shining brightly into our bedroom window. I thought it was going to remain dark forever. With the first vivid rays arising over the tops of the trees to where they could peek into our homes, I felt my special day was here. I quickly jumped out of my cozy bed and into the clothes I had prepared for my first day on the job. This was even more exciting than my first day at Hibbard’s. By the time I came out of the bathroom our bed was empty. Where had Louis disappeared to in such quick time I wondered. As I headed to the kitchen to put some coffee on, I could smell the wonderful fresh aroma brewing. Our two prettiest cups sat on the table. In minutes our toast was lightly brown ready to be buttered. We sat and chatted together as we enjoyed the delicious taste of fresh home made wild strawberry jam, my favourite. No need to make my lunch today as it would be delivered. I wonder who the special fairy is? I was so excited that I bounced all the way there wearing a huge smile that no one would be able to remove. A few ladies waved to me calling best wishes or have a nice day, and some good luck. This helped to stir up the butterflies flitting around my tummy. It was but minutes after opening the door that I heard chatter. Female chatter. I did not recognize the voices, but all the same my tummy began to buzz with the feel of butterflies again.

As they walked inside I stood there awestricken for what seemed like minutes, but am sure it was really a few seconds. Then I found my tongue welcoming them inside. I heard so many oohs and awws between the mixture of compliments. Are they are merely window shopping? A short buxom lady walked over to the counter greeting me with a friendly smile. “Good Morning!” With that everyone else chimed in repeating their names one by one. This lady wearing a pretty blue dress that I silently thought kind of matched my hut asked if she could speak to me about her daughter’s wedding. By the time we finished discussing the bridal bouquets she had included bouts, as she called them, and more for the church. For now she would like to bring her daughter over to make the choices. My first appointment! Then another lady loudly proclaimed that she was next and that she had really wanted to be my first customer, but her friend beat her to it. After the laughter and kidding died down she made an appointment for Saturday with her daughter and future mother-in-law to attend. Shortly after another lady entered coming straight to the desk to speak with me. Her daughter was graduating from some special school that I had never heard of and therefore flowers were needed. Could they please have a Saturday appointment making sure I knew how disappointed she was that they did not get the first one of the day. By the time they all cleared out it was noon. I was left standing there wondering just what all had happened. The remainder of the ladies had each purchased something. I had plants on display as well as a few flowery aprons that I had sewn. One lady ordered three more aprons for gifts. By the end of the day I was on cloud heaven. There was little plants and miscellaneous items left and there were still more days in the week. I never expected to be so earnestly welcomed. As I walked home in the waning sunshine I was plainly in a frenzy. What all happened? Does this mean there will be no one visiting my store for the remainder of the week? Louis had suggested that he make a corner table with a cupboard door below to hold some of my supplies. Up until now I had no idea just what I would use it for, but now I had loads of ideas. I could always be busy when there were no

customers. I wonder if Louis could build it tonight, and perhaps make my hut a little larger at the same time. That evening Luella called me to see how my day went that ended by saying they would be stopping by on Sunday afternoon for a cup of coffee. I was of course looking forward to a visit from family. Sunday afternoon came sooner than I thought. Louis was in his garage making the final touches on the corner cabinet so it could be installed this evening. I decided I would take an inventory of what had sold mostly that I should replace. My goodness, aprons were a big item. I knew that I would be making them in seasonal flowers as time went on throughout the year. Now I must dig out my pattern for aprons for little girls that I used for Luella. I was surprised just how much money I had taken in. I did realize there was some but so much? As the days and weeks moved on I was never without anything to do. I had five weddings to take care of. Ladies and their daughters came in from places I had never heard of. The steady consensus was that no one wished to travel to the city when they would be able to someone in their own community. Now the door was open for new opportunities for me. I do have some unique ideas that are not randomly seen in the big stores that I have been hoping to use. Sunday came with Frank and Luella stopping in for a short visit in the afternoon. Frank and Tito had made a high backed stool for me that I welcomed with open arms. Luella surprised me with a variety of sewn items such as aprons, a pair of rod pocket kitchen window curtains in a soft blue background with tiny flowers. I am sure they will sell, but perhaps we should wait and see. Frank built me the sweetest mailbox. It was a replica of my Hut painted in the same soft blue leaving the addition of tiny flowers for me to add. I loved it. I did not realize when they came to visit that he also brought a stand for it. Louis attached it to a sturdy base, levelled the area near the front step and then anchored it in place. Instead of placing it straight with the line of the door, he placed it so the mini hut was on an angle giving it an interesting and captivating appeal. It was but a few weeks when I checked my mail to find papers requesting

everything from flower appointments to curtains and most of all aprons. So it began to be the place I checked before unlocking my door. For such a small community my little hut was bustling, but would the well run dry? I am so grateful to Luella and Glenda for their help. They were just as excited as two school kids. They seem to have so much fun when they are together which we find very gratifying. One never knows how that can turn out in any family. With Frank and Luella not having children she likes to keep busy. She says she enjoys the evenings to sew while Frank is often at work and Frankie and Thumper are sleeping. Two ladies in the community donated their retired sewing machines to them. To express my gratitude to them, I made a floral centerpiece for each. Now requests are coming in for more. The word has spread. Most ladies had never heard of having flowers displayed in their home. Usually it was just what was needed most. Hibbard’s was very generous in giving me a special price on their materials for curtains and aprons that I then turned over to the girls. They were in their glory sewing up a storm. With the rod pocket style curtain there was the assurance they would fit most every window width. Months flew by as the money rolled in. The majority of my customers were from nearby communities that wanted to purchase something a little different than was seen in the big city. The country look had become inviting. After receiving so many compliments on my dress I decided I had better make another couple, but this time they will both have semi large pockets to hold cash that was often handed to me as they were walking out the door with a prized purchase. Grandchildren had become the latest craze in our family. They seemed to be popping out left and right as Louis said. The little nursery was getting well used just like we had hoped. They are such a joy. One thing about them, they can get wound up with Grandpa and then go home as we stand at the door throwing goodbye kisses to them.

Chapter Fifteen

Day in court . . .

After all this time the day had finally arrived when Curtis, Henry and Leroy would get their day in court hopefully followed up with jail time. First of all Wanda would need to tell her story before the judge and jury. The first week the courtroom was filled with onlookers. Some were there to Wanda, and of course some were there just to hear the sorry details of someone else’s life all to Wanda’s embarrassment. Wanda was dressed in a new pair of black pants with black flat shoes. Her white top held some red blotches here and there. The short cap sleeves showed her thin arms. Her expression was tight as nervousness crept throughout her thin face. She still had many bare spots on her scalp as a result of having her hair pulled out. Some gasps in the courtroom could be heard as she took the stand. Tears of sympathy could be seen on some faces. With eyes downcast, Wanda placed her bandaged hand on a worn bible as she swore to tell the truth as only she would. She told me she was no longer going to be afraid to speak her truth. As promised on her first day that she would be on the stand I was there sitting as far up front as I could. I wanted her to know she was not alone. I also wanted to remind her that the shame she was feeling was really their shame not hers. She had done nothing wrong. Every time she slouched down in her seat, I sat a little straighter reminding her to hold her head up high. Henry was the first to be called to the stand. True to form he had plenty to say. Wanda’s lawyer stood directly in his eye line with Leroy. Following minutes of Henry trying his best to see around Mr. Schoem, Leroy was removed from the court room until it was his turn on the stand. This promptly drew a few curse words from Henry which only received him a tongue lashing from the judge. Any more and he will be held in contempt of court. Ahhh, one point for Wanda I thought. Henry was quickly showing his hidden side. Later Wanda said she felt a little better knowing that from then on Henry

and Leroy would not both be in the courtroom at the same time. They also could not be there when Curtis was in attendance nor could Curtis be there when either Henry, Leroy, or Wanda were on the stand. While the Judge was very stern with them, he showed a much warmer side to Wanda. His reputation was known to be a no-nonsense man. I felt the air in the courtroom change from curiosity to sympathy for Wanda. Sometimes it seemed the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The criticism hung low and heavy. Whispers could be heard but not understood until the judge ordered quiet in his courtroom or everyone would have to leave. I silently prayed this would not happen as I then could not be there for Wanda. As I left for the lunch break I noticed Clifford there. I breathed a sigh of relief. She would not be alone. Big brother was here. Since I was not allowed to her for lunch I decided it best to just leave. The next few days my mind was forever in the wonder cloud. Wonder what is happening to Wanda now. Wonder who is testifying against Wanda. Wonder what lies Leroy was trying to spread. Mostly I wonder just what Curtis is doing and saying and planning for the future. You can be sure he is trying his best to think of some kind of revenge for her. Will Wanda ever be free? It is bad enough that our private life follows us wherever we go, but to have it aired before the whole community is a huge lump to swallow. Most people will move on to some other piece of chitchat. There is always something to keep the busybodies jabbering. In the meantime Wanda must try to hold her head up high because she is the one that knows the real story. A few weeks later Louis and I were invited to the Rascal Rally for a late after hour dinner. There would be a party of four. As we entered via the back door a weird feeling washed over me. I looked at Louis just as he was resting his hand on my arm. It was cold as ice. Before I could mouth the word what to him the door from the dining room opened. In entered Leroy spitting and cursing away. My heart began to beat faster. My feelings immediately turned to anger while Louis said he felt the worst fear he has ever felt. What were we about to find in the dining room? The tension was terse. It was obvious that Leroy was about to settle a score with Clifford. He knew that anything he did or said to Wanda would infuriate

Clifford. I knew Clifford would protect his sister to his last breath. My eyes had quickly scanned the counters for any sign of knives that may lay handy for Leroy. I had seen nothing, but was I able to actually focus on everything or did I just see a little on the surface. Within a short minute Louis had talked our way into the dining area. An area that he thought would be safer at least until we got our bearings as to what all was and had taken place. There sat Wanda tied to the chair she always used when we visited. Her face was white with fear. He had gagged her with a tea towel. Her sweater had been cut in several places across her chest with a knife. I could not see blood seeping through which was small consolation. There was blood on the floor. The beast tied the tea towel so tight her mouth was tearing. Leroy made sure I could see the blood dripping down the side of sweet Wanda’s lips. Now I knew I would be next. I desperately willed Louis to be with us, but deep down I knew that was not to be. Where is Clifford? Like me Louis was scanning the dining area for signs of a struggle to give him a small clue as to where he might find Clifford. At the very least the direction to search but there was nothing. As I expected Leroy walked over to me displaying his filthy tongue with spit running down. Before he got to our table I heard Louis speak in a voice I had never heard before. He was fired up. He was ready to take Leroy on. I knew he has never been the type of person to start a dispute, but he will not walk away from seeing anyone hurt. Trouble is brewing in here. I must help my husband and my friend. But how? Before I could do or say anything Louis spoke calmly to Leroy even though his legs were shaking. “So Leroy, what is it you would like to speak to us about?” “I do not got nothin I want you to say. Ya just start listenin to me. Ya hear?” “Alright. Tell us what it is you want us to know. We are listening, but you need to speak openly without shouting so I can help you to get whatever it is you want. Understand?”

“Ya, I understand. Ya think I is stupid?” “No. I just want us to understand each other. I will listen to you, but you must listen to me in return. Deal?” “You cannot trick me man. I make the deals here. You listen and do what I tell ya to do. That is how it is done. Do not you know nothin’?” With slobber running down his chin that he periodically wiped off with his sleeve, he began to become more impatient and angry as he tried to spit out some words of hate to Louis. I could tell Louis was trying to make out the meaning of this jumble of words. “Sorry Leroy, but you will have to slow down and repeat yourself so I can make out just what you are saying.” Standing at the table I had my eyes fixed on a spot on the floor near where extra tables and folding chairs were kept. I was now sure this was a secret escape route from during the war. I must look away. Trying my best to not move so much as a muscle I turned my gaze across the room to where another table was leaning against the outer wall. What could I say about it if Leroy got agitated and demanded to know what I was thinking? “You is not very smart!” stated Leroy. With that Louis had an idea. “Mostly it is that I cannot always hear very well when I am getting tired so you will need to speak up.” That brought out just what Louis wanted to hear. Leroy began to shout as loud as he could distinctly carefully separating each word. Now anyone ing nearby could hear. Perhaps they will call for help. Wanda was losing her strength. Her head was starting to loll. What will I do if she es out? After what seemed like an eternity to me the front door and the kitchen burst open with officer Julian leading the way. With him were a couple more officers from nearby communities as well as three newly sworn in men from the farthest community from here. Guns were drawn. Suddenly Leroy became very quiet and polite. It was yes sir, no sir all the while keeping his hands above his head. While Officer Julian grilled him with one

question flying at him after the other Leroy began to beg to have his hands resting on the table. “My arms is gettin’ tired,” he whined. “Maybe they would feel better if I laid you on the floor and tied your hands above your head for a few days. Or is that something only bullies do to others? Is it punk?” spat out Office Julian. When no answer came he kicked the back of Leroy’s chair sending him flying against the table in one quick harsh move. With that Leroy let out a groan as he made a move to push his chair back only to find a heavy foot preventing him from doing what he thought he could easily do. “Oh yes Leroy. I forgot your ankles should be tied together. Can someone do that, but be sure they are nice and snug. Wrap it around about three times.” With a gun between Leroy’s shoulders he was tied. Tie his wrists too. “Now fellas, we can relax for a while as we talk to the local bully.” Several hours later and a few cups of coffee for everyone except Leroy the interrogation sounded as though it was winding down. Louis and I were excused. We drove home in silence. Both feeling too drained from trying to take it all in we could barely think never mind speak. Once inside Louis suggested that we each have a shot, well a little shot of whiskey that is. The word shot is not one I like to hear, but first I want to prepare for bed just in case I should sleep tonight. Out of respect for Wanda and small town chatter the next few days were under a closed courtroom. It is difficult to have an unbiased witness in a small town. Due to the number of offenses again the brothers and their father time dragged on. While Leroy and Henry could only be tried on this one offense by their own ission there would be more trials coming in the future. Their new home now had bars instead of curtains. Thankfully business was booming for me in my little hut. I certainly have no idea where all the customers came from, but pleased they found me. I felt bad that some of them were wanting to see the community that homed this waitress. I had been so wrapped up in Wanda’s trial I forgot that graduation along with funerals is just around the corner. Ladies were wanting to place their orders. Some asked questions to which I calmly said I really do not know much of

anything and other times I just said I felt it was not my place to comment. At times I added a thank you for their concern which I would on to Wanda as I told them how much she appreciated their . I was surprised when some customers kindly dropped off cards for Wanda and Clifford. It was but a few days later that the cards began to come in in clumps. I was so afraid of mislaying one that I went home after a tired day in the shop with determination to make a mail bag just for Wanda. After scouring through my odds of fabrics I found the perfect piece. It was drapery fabric in a soft pink. Wanda’s favourite colour. Before I threaded the drawstring through I took out my paints and scrolled her name in large letters across the front. I hung it on the end of a tall counter just inside the door near the odds and sods baskets. This basket began to empty faster than I expected. Luella suggested that I have a button basket. Such a great idea. I knew just where I could purchase them at a clearance price. They were new. They also were in all sorts of colours and sizes. One day a salesman came into Hibbard’s. He was selling small sewing items for the lady of the house. This was not something they sold, but did direct him to me. I decided to take a chance on it. In the bag were assorted thimbles, tape measures, pincushions and some other little thing that I was not familiar with. The price was right. As it was near Christmas time children came in with their coins to see what they could find for their mothers. With only days to go before Santa would arrive my basket was empty. My little hut became the talk of the town in the kindest way. My business began to grow. When it was only a few weeks from the holidays Glenda, Luella and Stella each alternated a day in the week to come in and help me. They were like celebrities. The ladies came in just to meet my girls. I received so many compliments on my homey shop and how welcomed they were. I often witnessed a couple ladies at a time gathering under the big tree with the wooden bench out the front just to chat. This brought back memories of my mother telling me how ladies clustered in the back of their general store in their town when it was too cold outside to stop on the old rickety boardwalk for a visit with neighbours they only saw on the odd trip to town. For her these were special times, and so I am too happy to try to

make room for these ladies. May their memories be of my little hut as well. Christmas came quickly this year. Somehow there seemed to be numerous presents for Joshua. Louis made the most beautiful rocking horse crafted from pine. The floor boards between the front and back feet were inset crosswise with four sturdy boards. His mane and tail were made of twisted deep purple rope. I am not sure just what he used to make the eyes, but the rivet in the center looked like his pupil. So realistic. Along the side of the runner he painted Joshua’s name, It was a hit. Now Joshua needs to name him. So far it appears that he shall be called Horsey. I did not know that Horsey would go vroom whenever he moves. I had also located a puppy pull toy. With rollers under his feet and a leash of red and yellow rope Theo was able to take him along inside or outside as he was made of a solid plastic white with black spots. His ears that flopped and tail that wagged as his moved brought giggles to Theo. His dark red nose was intriguing. Throughout the day it received many slobbery kisses from his new owner. Theo seems to think his name should be Horsey as well. By the end of the day Theo had forgotten about his favourite saying, I wanna wabbit gamma. By the time we finished our early dinner everyone was ready to sit for a couple minutes before heading to their homes. Vance and Stella had the longest distance to go so they headed out first. It took a while for everyone to thank each other for their many gifts as they put boots and coats on. With numerous hugs and words of appreciation they managed their way out into the cold winter night. At least it was clear with neither rain nor snow falling. When quiet fell over our home Louis and I sat in our comfy chairs looking out over the peaceful sky. The six of them had done an excellent job of cleaning up so all that was left for us to do was to drink some red wine in our new glasses. There was so much to of this special day. This was a day that we shall never forget. Our first grandchild! The news was spread during the day that there were two more on the way. Louis was right. Now that they all have the hang of it there shall be more and more babies to come. Tomorrow they shall all be back for our annual Boxing Day brunch with Lily and Arnold Baker and their families. This year it is my turn to host. Brunch each year consists of apple juice, thick fluffy pancakes, browned sausages with syrup

flowing freely over them, and hard boiled eggs for those wishing a little more. Then I make a blueberry breakfast cake to have as we relax with our coffee. It is good to see everyone leave feeling well satisfied and contented. This day is a time to catch up with each other’s families. They have one granddaughter Susie. Just perfect for her and Theo to grow up together. Lily and I had decided that the one not hosting would bring a small gift for the grandchildren to play with. This year Lily brought a stuffed kitten for each. Susie’s had a pink ribbon around her neck while Theo’s had a blue ribbon. They were so soft and furry that they both snuggled to them for their afternoon unplanned nap. Just as I thought one promptly was named Horsey while the other was Puppy. There was no need to coax myself to go to sleep that night. Not sure which came first, the pillow or the sleep. As I approached my little hut in the morning I began to realize that something did not look just right. Not as I had left it a couple days ago. As the breeze was brisk filled with the feel of snow in the air to land on us at least by lunch time I had picked up my pace as my face was feeling the brunt of it. Sure enough! There had been at least one visitor since I locked the door on the 24th at noon closing for this special holiday. My heart sank. What had I done to acquire this distasteful behaviour? Who does not like me? Is it my business or my connection to Wanda? Or neither. I could hardly believe my eyes that my beautiful flowers had been painted over in a bright grass green. As much as I could see, the front and the one side wall will need to be redone. I wanted to sit on the bench and cry, but the wind had now picked up giving a real bite so my better judgement told me to go inside. With my heart resting on my black winter boots I tried to concentrate on my work with very little luck. My mind was wandering outside, but there was inside work to get caught up on. As I straightened the counters and shelves from the ‘just before closing rush’ I made a note of my inventory. To my surprise there was not much left. Before I place things back on the shelves I would dust and remove finger prints. At least the inside will be fresh and clean.

Being deep in thought I had not heard the door open. Suddenly I let out a gasp when Officer H cleared his throat. “Good morning Officer. Sorry but you did scare me this time. I was so deep in thought.” “I am so sorry. I really did not mean to frighten you but as I was driving by I noticed that someone has defaced your well cared for hut. Mind if I take a look around?” “Not at all. I do appreciate you stopping by.” “I will let you know if I see anything outside,” he said as he turned and walked out into the cold winter pulling his cap down lower over his forehead. Before noon came a couple ladies came in hopes of there still being some thread in the basket. The first lady was in luck but not the second. With a promise of ordering some more and a thank you for coming we wished each other a Happy New Year. As she stepped out into the bitter winter air she stopped. Turning to me she said, “I apologize for whoever defaced your lovely hut. Some people are just ignorant. Do not let it get you down. You and your family are a great addition to this community. Let me know if I can be of help,” and she was gone. Hmm, I wonder who she was. It was middle of the afternoon when I heard the door open and the wind rush in. I really think I must get a bell for that door. As I turned with my heart beating a little faster than usual, Louis was standing there with two cups of coffee and a big smile. Hopefully it is me he is sharing those with. It is me! That night I went to bed feeling a little better after mulling it over with Louis. We will make a few smaller changes within the next couple days. Tomorrow Louis will pick up and hang a bell at the door. I will purchase a small cash box as well as an inventory book to record those items that are of more value that someone just may be interested in taking. Louis said he felt that he should change the lock on the door to something more secure. But then, there is the window. How paranoid do we wish to get? We decided that it stops here.

When Tuesday morning rolled around my spirits were much higher. My little hut had been given a face lift. It now looked fresh and bright ready to greet the community. By mid afternoon Officer H stopped in for a visit to give me an update as to what he felt the problem had been. I wish his name was a little shorter instead of the fifteen letters. Even his name badge on his uniform said Officer H. Good enough for him it must be good enough for me. Besides he is such a nice young man. I have heard rumors that the young people call him the Smiling Officer or sometimes Mr. Smiley Sir. He told me that it is now quite sure that this little episode has to do with our defending Wanda. Curtis, Henry and Leroy are no longer able to have visitors. At least not until he is cleared of any connection with this. Wanda has returned to her job two days a week until she has rebuilt her stamina. Her nerves are settling down other than she continues to look over her shoulder at every sound. Whenever Louis or Clifford inquire if there is any news as to the disappearance of Wanda the answer is the same. We are still continuing our investigation, but we will get the evidence we need, comes the usual reply.

Chapter Sixteen

One year later . . .

It was close to the day of her capture that a knock came to their door. Clifford and Wanda had just returned home from work. They always have their supper at the Diner before leaving for home. For some reason Wanda said she had a strange feeling as they walked up the steps to their kitchen door, but seeing nothing she just thought it was her nerves. “Oh dear! What is it, Wanda?” I felt as though I could barely breath. Louis was standing there with his mouth open and shaking his head. I could see the steam beginning to rise. For the first couple seconds her lips began to quiver. Then just as quickly Wanda took in a deep breath, straightened her back and blurted out, “I refuse to run any more.” This time we had to calm Louis down. He was furious. “This has to stop!” he said as he tried to contain his anger. After I managed to herd us all into the living room where we could sit I suggested that they start at the beginning as to what is happening. Clifford began by telling us that a couple times lately there has been two male customers come into his diner. After they were seated and Wanda approached them with coffee she was told “Yes, but not from you you sl**. This is all your fault.” This was all Clifford needed to hear for the last time. Before they knew it he was at their table along with a couple customers. “Get out and don’t ever show your faces here again! Now move it!” shouted Clifford. “If you don’t want to be charged with harassment you best stay clear of us and especially Wanda.” “Make me,” sneered the one guy. Suddenly he found himself flying towards the door along with his buddy after him.

“I never touched him,” stated Clifford. “The two customers happened to be loggers ing through town. They had heard about our troubles here, and decided to lend a hand.” “Now that we have seen and heard first hand we think we will spend some time in this town before returning home. My sister lost her life to lowlifes like this a few years ago, and I will no longer stand back when someone needs help. By the way, I am Puck and this is my buddy Herb.” “Well Clifford, sounds like the remainder of the Calvary has arrived,” said Louis. The next few days were quiet, but word had spread throughout our community. Words of encouragement were shared. You are both welcome in our home if and when you need a place to go or just want to be out was the most common. The sentiment was the same everywhere except for one home near the outskirts of the shopping area. Not a word was heard from them. Suspicions were high all leading to the same place. Puck said to Clifford, “just leave it to me. I learned a few things from my sister’s horrific experience. Now we will speak to Officer H.” We have no idea just where in town Puck and Herb were staying. They just seemed to disappear into the darkness, but we knew their eyes and ears were on full alert. Louis had high hopes that these two burly men would bring our community back to us. For the next couple weeks there was no sign of trouble or of Puck and Herb. After having had a big wind storm one night I said to Louis, “Well maybe the wind has blown our troubles away.” “No my dear. That is not the case, but would be nice if it could be. They are just waiting for this town to let their guard down. They are here listening and watching, day and night. I think it might be a good idea if you went to the Rascal one Wednesday to have coffee with Wanda, but do not let your guard down either in word or action.” At my first opportunity I went for a nice easy walk to the Rascal. While I tried to make it seem as though there was nothing different my nerves were on edge. My eyes were darting from tree to shrub expecting someone to jump out at me.

That night I said to Louis this town is eerily calm. So much so that it gives me goose bumples. I know Wanda is feeling the same. There seems to be nothing to do but wait. Puck is likely right. Given enough time they will get itchy fingers. This community is ready for them. We want our own back. I had noticed that the neighbour next to my little hut had a dog that he had not had in the past. He brought him over to meet me one day explaining that this was his son’s pet. His name was Pup Dog. One look at him and I thought of the Little Red Riding Hood story. My what big teeth you have I said to him as he opened his jaw wide to show them all to me. There was a low growl with them. He was definitely standing his ground, and I was not about to challenge him. After being introduced I was able to pet him. Mind you I do so cautiously always speaking to him first. Soon be began to meander over whenever he saw me wanting to be petted. He loved to have his ears scratched. For this we became buddies. Pup Dog had been trained to not eat anything but that handed to him from his owner. This was something that was not d. Whenever untouched food was found it was a large clue that someone had been there. Soon I was back into my regular routine with thoughts of Wanda close by. From early on in our friendship I had found myself thinking, and somewhat comparing our lives. While Bud and I lived a very simple farm style life Wanda lived the town lifestyle. Until we began to share some of our personal lives I thought she must have had it so good. Little did I know. I imagined her going to the store here and there as she needed something or just to dream of all the pretty things that were available. Bit by bit I learned that I could not have been more wrong. I was shocked! Just listening to her made my skin crawl. Bud was gentle and considerate. As I think back at how many times he put his arms around me in the evening as he would say how bad he feels that he cannot give me any of the pretty things I must see in the General store, but one day he will give me the moon and the stars because he loved me so much. I never felt deprived as he too could see so much he would like. There was never a day that I did not feel loved.

My only concern was that I always had a hat for Sunday church, and so I did. I loved the ones with a small amount of tulle tucked in to give it an airy fancy flair. When a hat or other item was no longer usable I would carefully remove the tulle to save for a hat that was less expensive because it was plain. I could fix that. He disciplined his children with words rather than the sword. They knew to never push him or they would be taken to the barn for a more severe chat. It seemed that just the thought of having to go to the barn was punishment enough. Bud thought it was the embarrassment that they had disappointed him. To this day I do not know what it was he said as he always told them it was now over and done with. I often think of that when ever Wanda tells me of the way Curtis treated their boys for the slightest thing. Sometimes for just being in the room was too much for him. He never allowed them to speak or laugh when he was around. They did not receive a talking to, but rather usually a slap across the face leaving a mark for at least the next day. No one ever questioned them as to what had happened for fear of embarrassing them. In our family striking someone was not allowed. When Tito and Luella became of age to go out to play with their friends the first thing they had to do was have it cleared with me and then Bud. He would sit on a chair and one at a time he spoke to them looking into their eyes. First he told them how proud he was of their behaviour, how he knew they would not do things that were not approved. Then a few more words of trust before telling them to have a good time. He seemed to add that he was sure they would never let us down. This was his way of giving them responsibility for their actions. As I look back I can see where it worked. Loving kindness works. If they ever got into any mischief we were sure to not hear of it. I cannot imagine what it was like for Wanda to have to feed her sons in their bedroom just to please their father. Nor can I even imagine having to stand up to eat my supper to please someone that is supposed to have married me for love and not to control or bully. She told of how she kept her portions to a bare minimum lest he take it off her plate to throw it into the garbage. If it is going to be wasted it might as well go into the garbage for the wild animals to find during

the night he would say to her. They need it more. As her sons grew older they told their mother to put it on their plates where they could save it for her after their father had ed out for the night. It was cold but helped her to survive those gnawing hunger pains that followed her into the dark night. While Curtis chewed his food like an animal she had to be sure not to make any sign of partaking. The lion’s share was always to be his. What was left she could have providing he did not demand it be left for him to eat later. This seemed to be appalling to me. With us we shared equally being sure our children had enough to eat as well as Bud and myself. I tried to picture in my mind’s eye Wanda being still hungry but not able to touch the remainder of the food because her husband wanted more for himself even though he had already said he was stuffed, and could not eat another bite. As usual this was followed by three loud belches. A couple minutes later he would go outside as he told her he was going to puke up all that food he had to eat that was not fit for the animals. Then Wanda received the lecture about how her momma should have taught her how to cook so she did not have to feed him that slop. Just as I had been wondering how she felt upon hearing such cruel comments she said how she always wanted to pour the left overs over his head after he had ed out, but was too afraid to. She knew she would suffer his wrath when he came to meaner than a bull which would likely be even worse. I found it difficult to understand how our lives could have been so different. While living on the farm I always had visions of town life being so much better. Yes, they had access to more. They did not need to work from sun up to sun down each and every day. The more we shared of our lives the more grateful I have become. The little I saw while in town always made me feel like it was another life. One that I was never to enjoy. The shops were neat and clean. Merchants waved to each other as they ed by. Customers were greeted with a warm friendly smile. There were plank sidewalks freshly swept with a corn broom each morning and night before closing.

When I was a young girl I seeing the wood tree on the counters displaying lollipops in so many colours they made me drool. It is still that way today. My favourite would have been the bright cherry red pops just waiting for me to lick the sugar off with my tongue. Now I will be sure to let my grandchildren choose their favourite one to lick and get sticky all over their faces and fingers. Missing Bud and his kindness will forever be in my thoughts. Each night when I say my prayers I to include my thanks for bringing Bud and I together. I often reminisce of the day Bud spoke to my father. How I was so nervous that he just might say no, but why would he? My mother was saying how she had been waiting for this day to come. I was on cloud 9. From that moment on my parents treated Bud as though he was already a member of our family. For their love and care Bud returned the feeling. Once again time ed quickly as I tried to keep my mind on the present time as each day seemed to be uneventful in our community. Louis would say this is a good thing. It means everyone is busy with family and their jobs. Everyone is staying relatively healthy. I wondered just how long this would last, but never said anything to anyone. Puck and Herb seemed to have vanished. Be careful what you think my father would always say. Never mind wishing for it. This particular day I was just preparing to close shop when I heard heavy footsteps out the front followed by vicious growls and barking that I knew was from Pup Dog. Ever so carefully I tip toed over to the door. As quickly and quietly as I could I locked it with the special dead bolt Louis had installed should there be times just like this. By the sounds of Pup Dog I felt sure there was no one around back so again I crept to the window. As carefully as I could I slowly pulled the curtain so no one could see in. Just as I was about to breath a sigh of relief Pup Dog began ferociously barking at something or someone that was near my door. There was no way I could see out, and I certainly was not going to open the door. But who is out there? Just as I saw the door nob give a slight turn I heard Pup Dog doing what he was trained to do. This was the time that I had to do as Louis had said even tho I was

shaking. I was terrified. Pup Dog was ready to tear someone or something apart. In seconds the fight sounded as though there was a war going on. The only thing I had to help protect myself was my scissors. Would they be enough? Before I could move to get my scissors I heard some loud cursing from outside. By now I knew there were two men out there in front of my door. One was screaming that he had been bit. The other said he would get him. Oh no. Please let Pup Dog win. This community needs his protection. By now I knew it was me they were after. Were they intent on killing me or kidnapping me? I did not like the prospect of either. Thoughts began to flash through my mind. Will they do away with me here? Will they make me relive Wanda’s life in the bush? I am in no way as strong as Wanda. Perhaps I should be like the fairy tale and leave some crumbs for Louis to follow. In the end I decided to drop some things on the floor just like Hansel left a trail of crumbs behind. I knew Louis would know I would never leave a mess trailing after me. On the way to my shop today I had been thinking how the air was heavy. At the time I thought it felt as though it was laden with fear and unease. The branches on the trees appeared to be ready for a big storm. Their leaves were turning over. I could hear a howl in the wind that is not normal for this time of year. Is my mind playing tricks on me or is the wind telling me something? Why oh why did I not listen as I hurried along. My father always said nature was giving us lessons if only we took the time to listen. After what seemed like an enormous long time I heard my neighbour shout, “Put down those weapons or I will turn my dog on you. This gun is loaded. Which do you want or both?” Out of the darkened evening I suddenly heard two more voices ing in. It was non other than Puck and Herb. Where had they come from? As I stood tight against the back corner of the wall I could hear fighting and shouting. At times someone was thrown against my door frightening me even more. How strong is that lock? Tonight I will be asking Louis to make it even stronger. “You two! Hands above your head and I mean now!” What a relief to hear his

stern voice. A voice of authority. “Tell you what,” said Officer H. “How about the two of you walk this one over to the jail. I will take the mouthy one in my cruiser. We will make quite the picture going through town. By the time we get there everyone in this community will know what these two look like.” “What about my pal here?” asked my neighbour. “It would not hurt if he kept watch around here for a while. Then perhaps the two of you could escort this fine lady home, but check her house out before you leave her.” That night as I tried to sleep my mind was rolling with thoughts of all the things that could have gone wrong, and what will come next. My first idea was to leave town for a while, but this is where I have made my home. Since Pup Dog will be residing outside my little hut for the time being I should feel some comfort. I will at least be able to sleep at night with Louis beside me. My customers and I will be safe with Pup Dog outside. If Wanda is not going to run neither will I. Who will be next? What about Helen and Herbert? Are they going to be targets too? The next morning when I opened my door to go to work there sat Pup Dog waiting for me to scratch his ears. We are friends now. Without my asking he walked beside me all the way to my hut. A short while later he meandered over to see his Master. Must be his breakfast time. As Pup Dog and I wandered along my thoughts went back to Wanda. So much has been happening lately that I had not been thinking just how long it has been since Wanda has been gone. Within minutes I was engrossed in my business. There were messages for orders in my mailbox. This always brightens my day. It gives me something fun and interesting to think of, but I must to speak with Louis about Wanda. Before I knew it Louis walked through the door with two coffees. Looks like I shall be sharing my spam sandwich once again. I really do not mind. The afternoon flew by what with some ladies stopping in to either place an order for something or to chat. Either way I enjoyed those afternoons.

Since we decided to go to the Rascal for dinner to see what is happening with Wanda I felt as though I could take my time walking home, sit down and rest my feet for a while. I found myself taking a longer route home. The one that takes me through a neighbourhood with multiple beautiful shrubs on their front yards. The colours and aroma were so fragrant I could have stayed there for hours just to breath it all in. As I walked by friendly greetings were extended by some ladies that have come into my shop. I think whenever possible I shall walk through other neighbourhoods here and there just to be friendly with our community. As we were finishing our mile high lemon pie that Louis can never resist, Clifford walked over to our table pulling out a chair to us for a short visit he said. Well here it is an hour later and the three of us are still sitting there. We both felt it has been some time since Clifford has been so relaxed. As he told us of the changes in Wanda’s life he could not stop smiling. There were some that he felt Wanda should share and not him. “Her divorce has come through. Her name change has also happened. Wanda is ready to begin this new leg of her life. Two more days and she will be here waiting on her customers,” Clifford said, “The first thing she will want to tell you is how she is not looking over her shoulder any longer. My spunky sister is back. I will let her tell you all about the rest of her exciting news.” With that we packed up and left with promises of returning the day after tomorrow for dinner. I felt as though the day would never arrive. What could it be that she has to tell I wondered. Finally we were seated at our special table with orders placed. As soon as Louis and I had finished eating he insisted that Wanda sit with me. He was going to help Clifford clean up. Time for girl talk! I could tell she was jumping to share something with me. Without waiting for Louis to actually leave I said to her, “Alright. It is time to just spill it. I cannot stand the wait any longer. I want to hear it all so do not leave anything out.”

“Oh Anna. I am so excited to share my good news with you.” “Well Wanda. I know that but tell all the stuff I do not know before I burst.” Wearing the largest smile I have seen on her face for ever so long she began to laugh as she pulled her hair back with two pretty white clips. So much prettier than a hair net look. “I have been staying with Stella’s parents. Her mother Mabel and my mother Mary were sisters. Her mother Mabel had such a good marriage. Her father was a good man as both father and husband. Unfortunately my mother did not do so well. Oh, my father was plenty nice for the first years, and then he began drinking with his buddies after work. Mother said they just did not have the extra money and so the home suffered. Mother took in mending to make a few extra dollars, but with four of us it just did not go very far. Then as you know two of my brothers became a problem that you already know all about. When Clifford left home I missed him something fiercely. I no longer had someone to protect me. Mother did her best, but usually was just too tired to notice it all. Anyway before I left for Aunt Mabel’s place I had a list of questions for her. The first thing I wanted to know was did she think I could gain a divorce. I wanted to be rid of Curtis and his name for the rest of my life. Henry and Leroy decided they had too much iration for their father to not stick with him and his nasty ways. No matter how much my mother talked to them they just became firmer in their ideas. She was wrong and their father was right. Eventually she managed to have them removed from her home due to abuse. Either they left or she would press charges which meant jail time. By now my father had been in and out of jail so many times I can not . I can not even begin to imagine what it is like to contemplate pressing charges against a member of your own family, but there are times when one must just to be safe. Anyway, Auntie knew someone that worked with the law so she asked him about a divorce for me. Following a couple visits to his office to answer questions and fill out forms, he assured me it was just a matter of time until it would be finalized. Like a couple weeks. I was ecstatic. It can and will happen.

At the same time I wished to change my name for once and for all. I had chosen Sally Mary MacCaa on my way there. Mary was also my mother’s name. I often think how upset my grandmother would have been if she had witnessed her daughter’s life. Mary was also my grandmother’s name. From now on I shall try to make her proud of her name sake as well as her granddaughter. It was so nice to have Stella there to talk to about some of my troubles. I got an idea of how someone else my age felt. It was a lot to take in for the both of us,” she said. As I expected Stella said it was hard for her to imagine what it has been like since she has had the most kind and loving parents. I felt she had reassured Wanda or rather Sally that it was a good idea. “Since it is your idea, Sally I am sure you will be happy with your choice,” Stella said. “Now when I am at work I wear a large name tag with Sally on it. If anyone persisted in knowing why the name change she would say that Wanda is her second name and always liked it, but has now decided she is happy with the name her mother chose for her.” Of course we know that is not quit how it was, but no one pushes further and we certainly will not spill her beans. Several weeks later a very nice young man appeared in town. He was here on business for the law firm he was working with. I could not determine his age by looking at him as he was so well groomed with a young face and sparkling bright brown eyes. He wore casual dress pants and a well pressed shirt with a matching sweater over top. He was all business with that friendly smile. To Louis and I he introduced himself as Gabriel Fournier. “Well it is nice to have a Frenchman in our midst,” said Louis. “Does this mean you originated from Quebec?” His accent was ever so slight, but it was there. “Yes it does. I left home when I completed high school to attend college in the big city which had always been an attraction to me. My father willingly gave me his blessings, but added that I had better do something good with it. So I thought, why not go to law school and here I am today. By the way during college my friends started calling me Gab and it seems to have stuck.” “Well, Gab welcome to our community. No idea just how long you plan to hang

around but looks like you will be a welcome sight.” I just knew that Gab was representing Sally. While my mind told me how they would make such a handsome couple I kept my thoughts to myself. A week later Louis and I walked into the Rascal to Clifford and Sally for dinner and there sat none other than Gab wearing one of Clifford’s aprons. Quickly he was up and helping to carry out our dinners. Louis and I stole a brief glance at each other, but saying nothing. As we walked home later that evening we both blurted out, “did you pick up on what I saw?” Sparkles had been flying, nerves were jittery and secrets were being kept. This was no casual business acquaintance. Sally could not fool me or Louis, but if this is a secret we shall keep it too. I will not ask questions. When and if she is ready to share she will. Next Sunday we were planning to have a family dinner which now included Vance and Stella so I asked if the three of them would like to us as well. Gab immediately thanked me for inviting him, but said he was leaving for home on Friday afternoon. Sally and Clifford thanked us immensely for including them even though they would be busy preparing for the week to come. Sunday is the only day they open late so they make the most of this time. Every time I stepped outside for a walk whether it was for work or just whenever, Sally flew through my mind just like the wind flicked the pages in my book as I sat on my rocker reading. Some days I couldn’t keep up with the thoughts of my friend. It seemed as though so much was changing in her life just over night. I know she is smitten with him and Gab with her. It is beginning to concern me with thoughts of sincerity on Gab’s part. This is so fast. Is Sally so anxious to meet a nice young man that she will believe a bag full of tales that are not sincere? Sunday came faster than the birds in the fresh spring air. When the winter winds come they leave even faster as they fly to greener pastures where the sun is bright and warm without so much as a chirp of good bye or see you in the spring.

The air was a little on the fresh side. The breeze gently swaying the willows back and forth. At least the sky was a clear blue with only a few wisps of white cloud floating along. The morning yellow sun was bursting through the faraway trees. A gorgeous day ahead for a picnic. I best leave my dreaming for another day as soon our guests will begin to arrive. Already I can smell Clifford’s fried chicken. Before I knew it there was only the remains of a feast left behind. As usual I was too busy tending to our guests to do more than just nibble. Then I ed Sally telling me to be sure to check the kitchen cupboard beside the refrigerator. That sneaky smile told me she had been up to something. Sure enough there was a platter covered in chicken, salads and all things tasty. Another plate rested on the shelf above filled with yummy desserts. The center of the fancy plate displayed all things chocolate. My favourites. Just for me, but I will share with Louis. The following weeks flew by. Business in my little hut was holding its own. Each day ladies were dropping in to see what was new. I increased my sewn items to include potholders and children’s aprons. The Chef style with a chef hat for the boys. For the little girls accenting pockets and on some a frilly accent around the bottom. Little hats to match. An enticing way to have their hair off their face. Christmas fabric and Easter fabric were so very popular. Here and there I sprinkled some little nightgowns among the aprons. Also a few workshop style aprons for the boys. Whatever I could think of to make from small pieces of fabric sold. Hankies for both boys and girls were a hit. Head scarves for the young girls to keep their hair from flying all over in the wind and dust sold as fast as the girls and I could make them. Whatever will I do when this well runs dry? By now the news was out that both girls were pregnant. Well, not Glenda. Just Stella and Luella. They seemed to think they would have their babies within a month of the other. Vance tried to tell everyone that it was planned so they could grow up to be friends. I am not asking just what he means by planned. We shall wait and see, but for sure we will be in baby heaven for a while. Shortly after this news came Louis and I began to feel that perhaps I should retire. Does he think I am getting too old? Some days I think he just might be

right. I want to have time and energy left to enjoy the grandbabies. The following Sunday we were all invited to Sunday dinner at Tito’s place. The six of them had something important they wished to discuss with us. Now our minds were flitting from one thing to the next. Thank goodness Sunday came, but non too early. Will it be good news or not? Sunday arrived at last. As usual we were greeted with hugs and some kisses before we were escorted to the table. What a lovely spread lay before us. Our favourite. Stella’s homemade potato salad. There was everything one could imagine. A favourite for each of us. Cold roast beef slices, Salmon loaf, coleslaw, baking powder biscuits and so much more. Not only was everything we loved there, it tasted delicious. Dishes were cleared and coffee and tea served along with desserts. There was a lemon pie, apple tarts and my favourite . . . cookies. Three different kinds mind you! Soon everyone declared they were stuffed to the brim. Louis then took it upon himself to thank the six of them for the great meal we enjoyed together. So much thought had gone into it making many of our favourites. And everyone did their part. As he sat down he said, “Ok. Now let us get on with the show. What great ideas is it you all have?” Since Vance was the oldest the task of springing their ideas on us fell to him. In a nutshell, they said how they felt we were getting too old to spend all our time working, especially me. The girls were wanting to take over the little hut. They did not want it sold. Because we started it they each felt strongly that it should remain in the family. They did ask Louis how he felt about Tito and Frank adding an addition to the side so wood toys could be made and sold. It was agreed. As we rode home in silence it suddenly struck me that no one mentioned just when they were going to take over. “Did you detect when they were going to change our lives Louis?” “No, I did not. I thought of it once to ask, but something was said and so I lost my train of thought. I do not know about you, but I feel it could work. Each one

contributing their efforts and time.” “Yes it certainly could. I just hope that it may not be too much togetherness for them.” “You know what. I think I shall build a playhouse under that large tree so they can babysit their own children. What do you think?” And so it came to be. The playhouse was a replica of my shop with two floors. It was insulated so they could be in there year round. I purchased a child’s size corn broom so they could keep it clean both inside and out. Granny found herself getting tough. A few days later Sally stopped by for a chat. “I hear there are big changes coming to the little hut. Can I come over to play in it too?” Before she left I thought what the heck I shall ask. “Any big plans heading your way Sally?” “Gee I am not exactly sure. I have been so busy digesting everything that has happened to myself and how to get back on track that I have not thought about anything else. I am getting myself and big brother settled as we share one unit. Clifford said he feels that our plans are materializing. Clifford has pretty well completed making it into two private suites within one larger home so we will each have our privacy. We can have time together but yet time alone. My suite will be pretty much in the center so if anyone wishes to break in they must go through big brother first. We have two complete kitchens that will likely not get used much as we can continue to eat at the diner, but perhaps one day I may wish to be lazy and just hang out here for a change, said Sally” It certainly sounded good to us. We both felt it will work for them. They each need their own space especially when Gab comes to town. With that thought in the open we both smiled to ourselves.

Chapter Seventeen

Gus

We both had been thinking of Gus lately it seems. Last week we missed his telephone call. Gus had been so diligent at being in touch with us so we would not worry that it seemed concerning. We decided that Wednesday we are going to check on him. No more waiting for a nice day for the drive. Naturally the wind played tricks on us all the way. First it would blow one direction and then the other bringing with it the feel of ice on its wings, but it is much too early. I am not anywhere near ready for an early winter. The feel of a mild fall waiting for me was much more appealing. What is with Mother Nature anyway? Tito says she just can’t make up her mind, that cheeky son of mine that I love so much. The closer we came to Gus’s place the more rain they had. The deep ditches were overflowing with their dark murky cold water. As we drove past the Wild Rose bushes the road was in such terrible condition that Louis had to slow down. There was still the scent of Sally lingering everywhere. It was in the air, in the bushes as the breeze blew stronger than usual. Even though there was really nothing there but roses the thought lingered on. I could see where it would be easy for someone to slid off the road into a pile of trouble. No worry of me going to sleep on today’s trip. It was but five minutes later that I screamed! Louis hit the brakes causing us to sway from one side of the road to the other in the mud. He said he had seen it too. There was a body floating face up in the ditch. From my window I could see him blown up like an inflatable balloon with arms and legs stretched out. This was not Wacky Wack from the circus. In this open roadside ditch the water was deep and swift transporting the body towards town at a rapid clip. We ran along the road catching up to get a better look at who it might be. Neither of us recognized him. He appeared to be about five foot ten with huge wide open sky blue eyes that

stared straight ahead. He had that ruddy complexion that people receive when they are outside in the sun and wind. We ran along side for a while until we realized we must get our car. As we drove along being careful to not get drawn any further into the murky ditch I asked Louis what we were going to do to get him to town. “Well, I think he will just float in on his own like he is doing now,” said Louis with a smirk on his face. “NO. I am serious Louis. We can not just leave him in there.” “Why not? He will not fit in my car unless you wish to walk behind. Besides he is so wet. The speed he is travelling he will be there before dark.” “Louis! I am serious. We need to help.” “I know dear, and we will. As soon as we get to town we shall report what we have seen. They will send someone out to retrieve the body. There really is not much more we can do. For now let us just hope that no one notices him there and decides to remove him from the ditch. They may not realize that the cold water is what is keeping him in the near comatose state. He is in a very deep sleep and so does not respond to the situation around him. It does not appear to me that rigor mortis has set in. From my memory as a teenager of a farm accident that my father and I had come across my guess is that he could hear us speaking. That is why I told him someone would be coming for him soon. I really did want to give him hope. There is a drug that can bring a human from this state slowly back to his bushytailed self. It may not last for a long period of time, but we shall leave that to the doctor to determine. I think it is called ??. Gee I can not , but it is something or other bark. Asonna bark sounds familiar to me, but maybe not.” I have never heard of it, I said. Guess we just wait and see. That poor soul. Whatever could have happened to him I wonder. After reporting the floating body to authorities we quickly went to check on Gus. Like always we went to the kitchen door as to not track inside leaves and stuff.

Going past the kitchen window I could see him sitting in his big chair. He appeared to me to be exhausted. Louis said the same. By now Louis was digging the key to the kitchen door out of his wallet. I tapped loudly on the window to no response. My blood was beginning to run cold. How long has he been sitting there in the most uncomfortable slo in calling to Gus began to fear the worst. Louis said he had a pulse so we called for help. Then I ed that a hospital nurse lived next door so out I flew. Today I cannot think of her name just how much I hope she is home. I furiously pounded on her door bringing her on the run. Poor soul. I am sure her heart was pounding as though it would break through her ribs. After quickly grabbing her black bag from her kitchen chair she flew out behind me calling to Gus to hang on. Molly is coming she repeated over and over. Could Gus hear her? I promised my dear friend Hannah I would make sure he was taken care of she began to repeat if to no one else but herself. In minutes Molly had checked for vital signs and whatever else I do not know. She went from a panicked neighbour to a calm assured nurse doing her job that she has been trained to do. “Get Old Doc on the phone. His number is on the wall beside the telephone,” instructed Molly. Louis flew into action. “Tell Molly she should give Gus a half a teaspoon of laudpheus,” said Old Doc. Everyone says to not worry. How can I not worry? I have no medical training for humans. I had learned how to help Bud during calving season, but they were animals. That is much different than when it is your much loved family. As serious as it was Bud and I pulled many a quill from our dog’s body. Their face was the most scary. All Bud had to calm him was a shot of home made whisky. A couple sips from an empty tin can would relax him while we frantically worked to save the life of our beloved pet. The house was uncannily quiet. The sound of a baby mouse scurrying across the room in search of his mother would have been heard. I could hear Louis and Molly breathing as they stood over Gus waiting for the slightest sign of life to appear. My heart was still pounding. Perhaps that is why I cannot hear Gus. I am making too much noise as I take as little breaths as possible.

Finally Old Doc arrived. “Gus my buddy! What has got into you? How long have you been down like this? I see some colour coming back into your face. How are your eyes? Can you open them for me please? Looks like laudpheus is at work.” After checking Gus over for a while as Old Doc kept clearing his throat with the odd hmm being faintly heard, I found I just had to step outside for a breath of fresh air. My rolling stomach needed it before it rose to the top spilling out. So tell me, what is going to happen to Gus? He must be taken care of. We cannot under any circumstances leave him here like this. Please Doc, explain it to me. “Louis and I will arrange the big sofa so that Gus can remain sitting up for another few days. We will place some large soft chairs around the side so as to prevent him from falling. It is best if the room temperature cools off a little. I will check back in regularly to see how he is doing. Are you able to check on him too Molly and report to me?” “Yes I will,” said Molly in her confident tone that told me it was all good in her hands. “And Molly, do not forget to tickle his cheek with your finger nail so we will know if Gus is able to hear,” said Old Doc. “What? Doc are you kidding around?” I asked. “Firstly I have never heard of these issues and we have lived in this community for some while. How come no one has ever so much as mentioned laudpheus in my presence. Did you just make that up?” All I received in return was a smile as he left the house. “Louis. Tonight we need to have a chat with our family. A serious chat! This is something that has me very concerned as it does not seem to me to be a laughing matter.” Before I could go on with my rant over something as crazy and scary as this Molly suggested that her and I go to her place for a cup of tea. Sounding like a great idea I promptly headed out the back door. Maybe someone will tell me the truth.

We sat for the next half hour at her table sipping sweet tea and a biscuit. Molly assured me this drug does exist. It is from the early years. The only ones to have concocted it in a modern form are two bootleggers in our area. They have also managed another one or two similar varieties to other common drugs. They have both been threatened to either be sure they are not using these drugs to young people that are not aware as to what they would be getting into or will be looking at very lengthy jail times. I suspect that Gus has had only a very tiny bit of it. I am pretty sure that he does not purchase from either bootlegger so am not sure just how this came to be. If you care to leave your telephone number with me I can keep you up to date. I know how close you and Hannah were. Thinking that Louis may be wanting to leave for home I thanked Molly as we made our way next door. Feeling somewhat better I stepped inside to see Gus sitting up at his kitchen table. My mouth fell open just as everything went black. I could hear Louis and Doc speaking to me from a very far distance. Doc was talking about salt. With a whiff of something strong in my nose I came to as I was helped up on to my feet. With rubber legs I was moved to a chair. Louis continued to assure me that this was no joke, and Gus will be fine in a couple days. He just received the brunt end of a terrible joke that Doc was going to report to authorities. Molly appeared to be as shaken as me. Gus was having his vitals taken by his favourite nurse. Now I knew he was in good hands. Between Molly and Doc he shall be fine, but will I recover from such a shock? As we drove home in relative silence I wondered just what life was like in the early years when bootleggers played God as they took someone’s life in their own hands. That night as I tried to build my nest so I could settle down into a peaceful sleep, my mind kept travelling back to earlier today. I told myself to just close my eyes and relax. Just as that was beginning to work and I felt as tho I would drift off Louis sneezed startling me out of my senses. I let out this booming spine-chilling screech that sent him leaping out of bed in a tizzy. With one foot tangled in the

sheets he fell to the floor face down with a loud smack causing blood to spurt from his nose. For some reason this brought me into a state of giggles as I leaned over the edge of the bed trying my hardest to show concern for his nose, but the giggles just would not stop. One peek at me and we were both laughing as though we had lost our minds. There had been nothing funny about our day today. The remainder of the larger part of the night we spent discussing our adventure today. That was not the Gus that either of us knew. What ever was it that possessed someone to give him a bit of that terrible drug and why. Of course I wanted to know how this could have happened. Did this have anything to do with him speaking out for Clifford and Wanda? Was Gus just receiving a warning? What are the after effects of laudpheus? Is this something that shall come back from time to time just to haunt him? No, not too likely was Molly’s answer. With that I gently breathed a sigh of relief. This is just too strange to be real.

I am not sure how the time has flown so fast, but it seems that it is new baby time once again. Theo has grown so much. He loves to chase dogs and cats laughing while they scurry away before he can catch them. Loves cookies and ice cream. Uncle Tito told him he ate so many cookies one Sunday that they made his hair curl. I shall close my Hut for a couple days when Glenda goes to hospital. Juliana wants to stay at Papa’s place not her place. Much easier for us and a treat for her. One Sunday afternoon Vance and Stella along with Theo in tow arrived for an early dinner. Theo had his little suitcase with him. As soon as ice cream and cookies were gobbled up he proudly said Mommy and Daddy could leave. He was ready for his sleepover with Grandma and Papa. We were to help prepare him for the baby that would be arriving in a few months. “So what do you think would be a nice name for your baby?” I asked. “Baby Blue” came the emphatic reply. As requested I suggested a couple more names, but no it was going to be Baby Blue. Time for Grandma to step back and let Mommy and Daddy deal with this one. They had chosen Landon if it was a boy. Baby Blue just would not work. When I thought I had him convinced to agree on another name. Zoe. Now we talked how that may not work as they have a puppy Zoe. Can not be two Zoes in one house. Out of the corner of his eye he looked at me, Baby Blue! The following evening Tito phoned to say we now have a beautiful seven pound baby granddaughter Brynlee. While Louis and I were ecstatic Juliana was just happy they were going to have a real live baby. Older brother Kayden just smiled as he sipped his raspberry Peace Tea taking it all in. It was a Thursday evening, two years later when Tito called to say they were at the hospital, but not to expect anything too soon. He would call us the next day. So what did he know. About four in the morning our phone rang. “Thought you would like to know that you have another grandson, Watson. And no, as much as Brynlee wants to call him Rainbow it shall be Watson. Oh dear, I get to break the news. They also have a two year old golden retriever called Kaiya and a four

month old golden retriever Oakley. One day at our family dinner Theo was looking from one to the other as the wheels turned. There was no doubt in his amble chatter that things were looking up. “Uncle Tito can keep the girls and we will keep the boys,” said Theo in his little know everything voice as he continued to race around with a car in each hand. Once again our lives became wrapped in our family. Babies, diapers and bottles. I was once again wrapped in my Hut and babies. I hung a picture of each grandchild on the back wall just in case there was someone that did not already know. Frank and Luella share their home with Frankie and Thumper. Two fluffy grey bunnies. With Frank loving to ski Luella too has found this is a sport she is quickly getting a liking for. So far nothing fancy, just whizzing down the slopes with the breeze in her face. Customers loved to look at the back wall for little advertisings from me. Each baby brought a smile to their face as they said memories returned of when their babies were so little as well. Whenever there was time to spare I could chat with them usually about how one’s life changes. It was a general open end conversation that the next customer could also in at any given moment. They too were happy to share bits of their family.

The hot dry summer that everyone was waiting for was here. The glorious bright sunshine that we all wanted was shining each day. The cold windy days of winter were soon forgotten. Children were out playing in their bare feet. Hats replaced sweaters and jackets. Neighbours stopped to chat as they took moments from their gardening work. For most people it was not work, but rather a hobby of sorts. The forlorn look from winter is already showing signs of attractive green grass with bright coloured flowers soon to bloom. Everyone took advantage of the great outdoors. Since the evenings remained warm and bright Louis and I decided to walk to the Rascal for some dinner one Wednesday afternoon. Before I stepped outside I snagged a sweater for the walk home. This brought a sudden surprised look from Louis. “What is with the sweater?” he asked. “Well, I have noticed that later in the evening I find my arms feeling a little chilly. Gosh, you do not think that is a sign of old age setting in do you?” “Well, certainly nothing to worry about. If it is you are just normal. Old age will visit us all too one day if we should be so lucky. Do not worry about it. Just be comfortable.” Before I knew it we were there. The path is so much shorter when you have neighbours to greet along the way. As often happens Sally and Clifford take the time to us. We always get engaged in an interesting conversation. Tonight it fell to Sally. “What do you think Anna? I would like to go for a drive to where the wild rose bushes are growing. They will now be in bloom as they show off their sweet fragrance. If I am to truly put things behind me, I think I would like to visit the pretty side of them. I feel as though I have no fear. Since we will be so close perhaps we could pop into the Flower Fresh Dry Cleaners. I feel so bad that I have never returned to visit Roy and Mildred Green after all they did for me,” said Sally without removing her eyes from the table. “I owe them a big thank you for their care and kindness.” Clifford said how he has had a new lady in helping out with cooking duties. Her

pancakes are to die for so perhaps we could go on the day that Norma is available. Perhaps her daughter Shirley will be available to wait tables. That was easily decided that we should take a day trip to Fernie to visit the Greens. We all agreed that it would be a great idea for Sally to put some of these things behind her. As she said, she needs to properly thank these loving people who readily took her into their home. The day finally arrived that everything worked well for us all. The weather was nice. Norma and her daughter were able to fill in at the Rascal. Stella said she would love to be at the Hut for me. No need to rush back she repeatedly said. Enjoy your day out. Louis had the newer and larger car which he readily volunteered to take and besides he loves to drive. Clifford immediately insisted the gas was to be on him not just because he gets a few cents off at his friends’ station, but because he wants to. Sally and I climbed into the back seat placing their picnic basket that was filled with delicious smelling roast beef on fresh baked bread. I knew there would be a couple other choices in there as well. Our basket was filled with cookies as well as other sweets to satisfy Louis’ sweet tooth. I topped it off with a bundle of large red sweet grapes. I also added some serviettes for our sticky fingers. Just in case we stop to watch a ball game or some other outdoor activity, we carry the vehicle cooler with us that contains a large jug of water and tumblers. We also have with us a large thermos of hot coffee from the Rascal. I think our tummies shall be fine today. It seemed as though we travelled for many miles along a gravel country road iring the variety of trees and wild grasses. Soon the ditches became deeper. Now I knew we were nearing the rose bushes. I felt the vehicle slow down as Louis too realized we were nearing the beautiful roses. We had decided that we would make no mention of the man floating in the water. When we left home I made sure that Sally would be sitting on the outside so as to give her a better view.

Suddenly we all heard Sally gasp. Louis came to an abrupt stop giving Sally time to collect her thoughts before any of us spoke. Her left hand was laying limply on the seat next to me. I slowly and carefully reached over placing my hand on top of her icy cold thin fingers. Tears began to fall as her shoulders shuddered. It was just a minute or two when Sally took a deep breath bringing herself in control. |”Louis if you don’t mind I think I would like to get out here for a couple minutes. You may all me if you wish. I just feel as though I would like to share my memories with you in hopes of being able to deal with this part of my capture.” We let Sally lead the way as we slowly trapsed closer to the bush area. After standing still staring into the dark bushes for a short while she turned towards the largest wild rose bush. “Anna, do you know just which bush it was that Mildred found me?” “No I do not. You see I have never spoken with either Mildred or Roy. But if you would feel better knowing you could ask them today. Then on our way home we could stop once more. Is that alright with you Louis?” “That would likely be a good idea. It just might become clearer in your mind. this is not too far from home so if you have more questions that you feel would get answered by being here we could always go this far another time.” “You know Sally,” said Clifford, “I think this is a very good idea for you to get things straight in your mind. Then you will begin to really feel settled and could then get on with your life so much easier for once and all.” As we wandered back and forth past the bushes I spied something sparkling in the dirt below. Always looking for a fortune to be waiting for me, I stooped to brush the loose leaves away. There before me lay a tarnished locket. I carefully picked it up examining it for any engraving but there was none. I stepped closer to Sally with it laying in the palm of my hand outstretched towards her. When I felt I was close enough for her to have a good look I stopped. Instantly her eyes fell to my hand. Seconds later her mouth fell open as the tears began to flow.

“This is the locket my mother gave me a long time ago. I had forgotten that I was wearing it that day. Do you seeing it Clifford?” “Yes. It was for a birthday gift for you. You were still quite young but you wanted it so much so mother gave in. You only had to promise you would look after it.” With the locket tightly clutched in the palm of Sally’s hand we all climbed back in. We still needed to visit with Roy and Mildred. Louis was able to take us to their door as their little wood framed house sat next to the cleaners. Watching Sally knock on the door brought shivers to me. I felt so nervous for her. How would I do what she just now needs to do if for no other reason than to bring the end of her troubles closer to her life so she can move on. Soon a hunched over lady with grey hair leaning heavily on her brown cane came to the door. In a moment I could see her gasp as she realized who it was. Mildred and Sally stood together hugging as they shed tears of relief. Then as they began to speak a stout gentleman walking with a pronounced limp stepped forward dropping his cane in the doorway. Sally leaned forward to pick it up for him. It was a most emotional moment that we were privy to see. So very heart breaking. Just as Sally was obviously going to leave Mildred reached into her apron pocket to retrieve a small box. Handing it to Sally she said something as she squeezed it into Sally’s palm. The ride home was quiet. Sally did not wish to stop along the way. Clifford felt this was for the best as it just may be too much for her to take in in one day. There will always be another. As we neared home Sally told us just how grateful she felt to be able to see them again so she could thank them from her heart. It was so heartening to be able to share with them just how much they have meant to her. To see Roy still having his soft quiet demeanour brought back the many memories of this loving gentleman. Mildred was just like the mother she had lost so many years ago. Sweet. Kind. Caring.

Just as they had told Sally their grandson and wife moved into the little blue house just behind them on Maple. The plan was when I was there that they would take over the operation of the Flower Fresh Dry Cleaners. Grandma and Grandpa would be able to spend time with the little ones. They no longer will have lonely moments. The Flower Fresh Dry Cleaners seemed to be flourishing under the direction of these young people. The outside has been painted. New frames replaced the partially rotting window frames. On the front window was a large sign that read: LAUNDRY

Drop Your Pants Here! No longer hung the cow bell at the door signalling the arrival of a guest. Mildred always felt that guest sounded more friendly than customer. Instead a bell that simply went Ding, Dong loud and clear caught everyone’s attention.

While Sally and I were busy chatting in the back seat Clifford took the time to tell Louis a little more about Herbert and Helen. “Well Herbert and I were just a couple young bucks, carefree and happy. We thought we had the world by the tail. It was as though we did not have a care in the world. Our ambitions were more on cars than girls or work. We both kept enough work in our sights to keep our cars running. Living at home our rent was cheap. There was a little country road a short way out of town that was perfect for night time drag racing. We both liked to compete against our buddies. This one night a strange car pulled up. No one knew the driver. He introduced himself as Andy and would like to see just what we had under those hoods. Andy wore a white shirt with sleeves rolled up past his elbows, black zoot tros that looked like they were popular during the 1940s. But he looked good with his handsome looks and slicked black hair. There was a confidence about him that soon attracted the girls. He was smooth. A cigarette sat on his right ear. Soon the girls began to swoon over this new guy in town. Herbert re there was no way he was going to be giving the eye to Helen. She was his. Like always a great time was had until one dark night that looked as though a storm was brewing once again. The clouds were a dark inky black. The trees were blowing this way and then that. The ditches were half filled with dirty water from last week’s storm. Andy’s confidence was also overflowing. He clearly wanted to impress the girls. As we began to call it a night Andy peeled out leaving a thick cloud of dust behind. The roar of the engine faded into the dusty air. We could tell he was swerving along the outside edge of the road in high speed. Much too high for an unfamiliar country road. That guy is crazy could be heard over and over as the remains of a competitive evening cleared away. The next morning Clifford said he woke to the pounding on the door. With his dad ed out straddling the sofa his mother quietly answered the door. It was the local officer looking for me. Being careful to not wake my father we stepped outside onto the front steps. I knew by the worried look on my mother’s face that I was in trouble. Had I been among those on the country road racing my car? I knew I needed to tell the truth.

“Was there a young man about your age there with a shiny black car. He wore a white shirt and black zoot tros?” “Yes Officer. We had never seen him before. All I know is his name is Andy. He left just shortly before we packed it in for the night.” “Was anyone drinking beer?” “Well we found him in his car wedged in the water filled ditch. Luckily he was able to stay cool keeping his wits about him so he did not drown. Had he not been found before too long he would not have had a chance as the dirty water was seeping inside.” I felt my legs go weak. I knew the colour was draining from my face. Are we all going to jail? I began to wonder. All kinds of thoughts were now filling my head. None of them were encouraging. I just knew that we were in deep trouble. Wait until my dad wakes. He will be beating me with his belt once again. I knew the time had come for me to leave if for no other reason than to protect my mother from taking the brunt of my punishments. As though the officer could read my mind he said, “Do not plan on running away or you will then be charged with mischief. For now we just wish to talk to each of you. I know how much it means when you are a young buck with a car full of horsepower just waiting to be shown off, but this must not take place again. Do you understand? We do not wish anyone to lose their life. We possibly will wish to speak with you again so do not leave town.” With that he turned and left just as my dad reached the steps. My father has never been known to waken from his night out in anything but a fowl mood. Being a disgusting bully he likes to have the audience of the neighbours as he bellows nastily at my mother and I. He dearly loves to humiliate us. Mother says to ignore it as it is his way of making himself feel bigger and better than us. No more. He does not even know why the Officer was here. To him it is just an excuse to be as violent as he can. I stole a quick glance at his puffed out red cheeks to know that he was about ready to explode. That is why he is removing his belt as he took a step closer to my mother. This time it is once too often. I caused this so now I need to bring it to a close once and for all.

Being younger and clearer of mind I was able to do what I had never dared do before. I grabbed the belt pushing him backwards away from mother. Just then my little sister Sally came toddling outside rubbing her eyes from the sandman that had visited her during the night. I was able to grab him by his shirt spinning him around so I could slap him across his back with his belt just like he has done to me so many times. Then I threw him down onto the ground to sober up as I threatened him with what I had been wanting to do for ever so long. The time has come. Without saying it Mother knew that I would be leaving home. I assured her not until this was settled. That evening as I gathered with my friends on the country road, we shared our lives at home with each other, but it was to be kept between us. We would take care of our home lives before we left. The next day we agreed to meet at the sawdust plant where our fathers worked. As soon as we walked in with myself in the lead, Mr. Brooks the Sawmill head foreman stepped out of his office inviting us inside. “Well, gentlemen. What can I do for you?” came his question as he tried his best to be friendly. “We have decided it is time for us to move on, but before we do that we need to feel assured that our fathers can no longer beat our mother or siblings. So now we are asking for your help.” “That sounds very irable, but how can I help?” “As we are confident that you are aware that after work there is much drinking taking place here in the lunch room. This not only leaves our mothers to have to deal with a drunk when he returns, but also deal with there not being any money from their pay checks to feed the family for which she then receives a beating. We are all old enough now to press charges of beating us and our mothers, but we feel it would be more beneficial if their pay checks were made out to the spouses. They could pick them up here on Friday at two o’clock giving them time to cash them at the bank and then purchase some food. They would still be home in time to have dinner on the table.

We have all decided that our fathers can no longer share the bedroom with our mothers. They must remain outside until they sober up and are invited in.” “But where will they sleep?” asked Mr. Brooks. “Well we all have a little hut out back for the sawdust. If it keeps the sawdust dry they will be dry too.” Mr. Brooks was clearly trying his best to keep the smile off his face. Following several minutes of pondering he said, “I will be happy to help you fellows out, but no more drag racing.” We agreed. It was up to us to explain this to our mothers, and he would explain it to his employees. It begins this Friday. With that he stood for us to leave. I shook hands with him feeling that just maybe my mother will no longer be suffering the wrath of her husband. Should any of them not follow these orders they would be able to be charged with neglect and beatings of their families. Jail time is also an open option. All that was left was for each of us to take on a new name as we packed our bag and headed out. “Gee Clifford! That is quite the life, but I surely commend you. You should be proud of yourself,” said Louis.

That evening after Louis told me Clifford’s story I began to wonder about Gus. I can not help but wonder if somewhere back there he too had to deal with some heavy family troubles. Bud never let on that there had been any harsh problems growing up. He did say on several occasions that their father was a stern man, but never mentioned anything other than that. Gus ed away a month following his heart attack. Louis and I attended his funeral. It was a closed casket. All Molly would say was that it was thought to be the best way. His children all came back to say their goodbyes. It had been many years since I had seen them. As quickly as they grew up, they moved away in order to either finish their schooling or to work. I was so pleased to see they are all as nice a their parents. Molly and I had a lovely chat just after the family headed out for home. There was someone there that Louis had met before and wished to speak with so it worked out well. Not that we had planned on it, but it worked out that we were both able to be updated on the Bootlegger situation as well as the fellow we found floating in the ditch. I was pleased to know that both bootleggers spent time in a rehab centre in Alberta. The remains of their home was torn down and burnt. The equipment they used was demolished beyond recognition and then hauled away to a refuse centre in Manitoba. Bootleggers are now being severely punished with jail time included. Both of them had severely damaged their minds to the point of just being a vegetable. They sit restrained in a chair so as to not fall out each day and all day. As for the man we found floating in the ditch, he has never been identified. He is now buried in a cemetery for the unknown in the country.

As far as I know there is no romantic involvement between Gab and Sally. Accordng to Sally he has reunited with a previous girl friend. While sparks are not flying towards the alter, a great friendship has formed. Sally has said that she is not interested in any type of a relationship. She has met a nice lady her age that lives close to her and Clifford. Her husband has ed away leaving her alone too with no children. Someone to share a little female chatter with is all she is interested in. She still is busy rebuilding her life both physically and mentally. There are still some people that give her a second and sometimes a third look when they first see her. It is obvious that she has been in an accident of some kind. I shall always try to make time for my friend. Sally and I have shared so much in the past. We do have a special type of bond. As for Sally’s sons John and Charles I no longer have any idea just where they are or what they are doing. Mum’s the word when either Clifford or Sally are around which is probably good as it really is not any one else’ business. By the looks of the water quickly forming in Sally’s eyes I am so afraid that they could be living a trouble filled life, but I really have no idea.

Wade and Isabella have retired. Neither of their children have any interest in running the store. Wade said that he cannot keep up with it any longer. So he is looking for a buyer. They are very hard to come by. Isabella too has some health issues that confine her to her bed or her wheelchair so she tends to refrain from going into the office even though she carries a wealth of information in her head. Due to the many years of Wade smoking both cigarettes and a pipe his lungs are not very good. Sometimes he coughs so much he loses his breath. While Isabella has never been a smoker she still coughs a lot as well.

Louis and I have both retired. Well, more or less. I no longer help out at either the Hut or Hibbard’s. Louis pretty much keeps himself busy doing odd jobs around our place both inside and out. It seems there are often little repairs either at home, the hut, or one of the kids home’s calling his name. The small light tasks he finds are easy for him to do, and they do help the three sons out as they have full time jobs as well. Since arthritis has come to visit the both of us in the last few years we are a little more restricted to what we can and feel up to doing. We are so fortunate our family is both willing and able to be there for us. Usually at the drop of a hat. My health has deteriorated noticeably in these recent years. At my doctor’s advice whenever I go outside I am sure to have my cane at my side just to give me something to hang on to should I feel that I am going to lose my balance. He says it is much better for the body to prevent a fall than to take one. When I came home from my doctor visit Louis promptly visited the Things in Need store returning with a walker on order for me when the day comes that I shall need it. My friend Dawn gave me a glitzy black and silver cane that had been her mother’s. One that I will love to use. One that is different. My Style. Stairs are beginning to be a challenge for both of us. So even though we only had three steps out the front and four to the back door, Frank built entrance ways that now had steps with grips on one side and a ramp beside them. Also sturdy railings. It is hard for me to even imagine just how quickly our lives have changed. One day we were just merrily going along in our happy way when the next day it seemed to have changed just like the wind. I had to chuckle the other evening as Louis said to me that never did he think he would be using Ben-Gay. Only old men did that, but here he sits on his comfortable chair rubbing it into his muscles and ts as it is a topical heat rub giving temporary relief to those suffering from arthritis and other similar aches. It has a strong distinctive menthol scent that covers a room instantly as it provides pain relief. Louis often laughs at how him and his friends say to each other that they now have become just like their fathers. Whenever any of our

family arrives shortly after Louis has the Ben-Gay cream out they start to laugh. “Dad has it again!” “Listen you young wipper snappers your day will come!” Louis would say with a big smile. He loved how all six called him Dad, but then I liked the way they all called me Mom. Fortunately Louis still likes driving. On a sunny day we usually find somewhere to go just to be out. When the weather is warm out we go for ice cream that we both really enjoy. There is a dairy farm a little way out of town that sells all things cow. Milk, cream, butter and ice cream in lots of different flavours. You get your choice of a single or double cone, a sundae, a banana split or in a bucket to take home. The cows graze close to the fenced off area. They eagerly wait to be petted. If someone leans on the fence they seem to think they are waiting to have their picture taken with them. They actually walk up close and pose. Some of the children like to walk in the pasture among the cows until they realize there are cow pies waiting to be stepped on. Some soft and fresh.

Of the six Tito seems to like to be with Bubba the most. As he says Bubba is the father he can ask for information and direction. There doesn’t seem to be anything that he doesn’t like to soak up from wood work to electrical to vehicles. Now and again Glenda seems to be having some difficulty with her right leg. She said it is the one that Polio attacked first. Her doctor says this could be a early sign of Post Polio returning one day. May it not be for a long time yet. Glenda still has three preschoolers to take care of. It amazes me how cheerfully and calmly she handles the little ones with such a scary threat hanging over her. Stella’s mother lives fairly close to them so she is able to help Stella out at times. When canning season is in full swing, every inch of the kitchen will be covered in jars with everything from pickles, to jam to fruit and vegetables. While the other two like to bake Stella cans. Having six young grandchildren seems overwhelming at times. When they come to visit at the same time we give that sigh of relief when everyone goes home. We get to listen to the quiet as we anxiously wait for the next visit. This evening Louis and I will take a walk around the neighbourhood iring the little homes we have seen for a long time. We comment on how lovely their yards are, how sleepy their pet dogs are as they laze about. We embrace the beautiful flower beds, the shrubs and neatly mowed lawns. We arrive home a little tired, but contented. We love our little community. It is home.

My COVID-19 Life

It was early in 2020 when the news on every radio and television station around the world was filled with talk of a virus travelling through China at a rapid rate. This was not like a flue. This was much more severe. This was a virus they had not found before. It was infecting people faster than the doctors knew what to do. They called it the Coronavirus. A few months later it was named COVID-19. A Pandemic has struck. The first person in the world to be diagnosed was on December 19, 2019. It was 80 years earlier that I was born at the start of WW11. As an infant and then a child I survived whooping cough. My poorer than dirt family survived the Great Depression. The many diseases like small pox, mumps, measles and polio were kind enough to miss me, but not other community children. Vaccinations were coming to the community schools. This was a must. These diseases had to be stopped. Eventually they were only a memory. Now I am once again in the most susceptible age for Covad-19. It is here. This time I am at the other end of the stick. Once again along with more others than I can count people are fighting for their lives. We, the vulnerable must remain diligent as we try our best to stay safe. Our provincial Health officer has guide lines in place to help keep us safe. Some followed them, some didn’t. I am a rule follower. After having tucked my sewing machine away in the bottom of the closet ten year ago, I decided I should bring it out. Perhaps I can still sew. Within my mind I just knew that we would soon need to be wearing masks. Patterns were on many internet sites, and they were free. With trial and error I located a pattern that was simple, and a good fit. Following a couple for my husband I each, I began to sew two for each of my family, thirty masks, and then extras that I gave away. A few for the little greatgrands as well. They were proud to wear them to do their part in this big war of a virus against the world. They would have one to wear, and one to wash. End result was I made close to forty to use all the material I purchased, but with a family of fifteen and some close friends that I tucked one into their birthday card, they were soon welcomed into a new home. First of all from the beginning they continuously urged people to constantly

wash their hands with soap and water for twenty seconds, and this is still and will be a very important health rule for all to follow. Perhaps even after the pandemic is over. We are to practice physical distancing. That is to maintain a distance of two meters or more between ourselves and others. They urged people to stay home when they are sick. No exceptions. As with so many other people some of my family were working from their homes. Church services were closing around the world while preparations were being made for another way to reach their people. Their messages were becoming available online. People were encouraged to be kind to one another. Be patient and comionate. Nearly a year has gone by. For me some days seemed long while others ed quickly. I frequently washed my hands with soap and water for the required 20 seconds and used Sanitizer as recommended. Now I have a dry skin problem because as we get older….With all the lotion I apply I can’t help but not wonder how that could happen. My hands were beginning to look as though I had scalded them. Now my doctor says try to stay away from hot water and as much soap and Sanitizer as possible. As I had purchased Vinyl gloves at the beginning I shall now be wearing them and then sanitizing over my gloves when necessary. I am not enjoying a shower in warm water but so I must. As restrictions became tighter as the number of infected cases rose, we were more limited as to who we could see and places we could go, churches included. For me this was a big loss as I had been attending church services all my life. It meant putting my church friends aside as social time was prohibited. This included our weekly coffee times with friends. More importantly I could not visit with my family. My two youngest greatgrandsons did not know me as I had only seen them from a distance once as babies. The other four great-grandchildren were a little older so they ed, but we were not able to visit as them and I were not in the same bubble. My son and daughter were able to bring me items they had picked up that I was in need of, but once again from a distance. We wore masks as we pushed items towards each other while standing outside. The outdoor yard became our new

living room. We were fortunate to have family that were both willing and able to shop for us as well as do other chores that were too risky for our senior age group. One day I had occasion to speak to one fellow regarding my writing Novels from a country half way around the world that mentioned that if they go outside without a face mask their police will pick them up in their Paddy Wagon to give them a free ride to jail. No excuses. He wished he lived in Canada where we have it all. He was astounded when I told him how we are encouraged to go for walks maintaining our safe distance but only with those within our bubble. That was so much more than they were having. This gave me a new appreciation for just how much we still have left. Our outdoor time became more precious both to our spirits and our health. Life in each country was now different as they tried their best to cope. For the first time that I can recall, and I have lived here in Canada all my life, the borders to our neighbours in the south has been closed to all nonessential travel for an indefinite time. All sports games have been canceled. Theaters closed. That meant no hockey or baseball games for me and others to watch. I also missed our day trips during a beautiful sunny day for a drive south for a few groceries and lunch out. We couldn’t see our American friends and relatives. New scenery is always a boost to one’s spirits. Since our health leader was encouraging us to get outside we too took this safe advantage. One day we took a drive to the beautiful Queen Elizabeth Park in Vancouver. After locating an area in this large park that was not hosting many visitors we went for a short walk along the trails to view the beautiful shrubs and flowers. Many years ago this was one of our two favourite parks to visit. This was during the 1950s. Then I was visiting with my mother and brother on a Sunday afternoon. These visits shall forever be among my many treasured memories to revisit. Early in the pandemic the weather was mild. It was not wise nor was it within our guidelines to visit inside. Visiting outside maintaining social distancing became the only way to see friends and relatives. Being close to a park I could drive over with my lawn chair tucked safely in the

trunk. We each brought with us our drink (non alcoholic) of choice and whatever we chose to eat. Two hours quickly ed. My church friends and I met in the church parking lot where there was ample room to spread out. Again we brought our chairs, coffee and munchies for our lunch. We had been meeting in a restaurant for well over twenty years. Eventually the weather turned on us robbing us of our once a week gathering. Just to get out of our house we would take a drive to our nearest Tims for a coffee and perhaps anything else we fancied. There we could go through the drive by window to both order and receive. From there we drove to the large parking lot outside the Recreation Centre where we sat in our vehicles along with others that were also maintaining their distance within their cars. We all were watching life go by on the busy street. Then it was home again for the remainder of the day. My days were usually spent reading and writing. After a while I thought I might just as well spend a little time here and there cleaning closets. How much fun is that? For a while I had been thinking this was needing to be done so may as well use this time while we are remaining close to home anyway. My second day I made a find. Low and behold there was a box containing two pairs of leather sandals that I loved just waiting to go to the Shoe Repair. They still fit me, and I still liked them. Now I was enthused to continue, but no more finds waiting for me. At first people were making phone calls to check on friends. But after a while it became difficult to hold a conversation as we were staying home with nothing new happening to tell. While some people visited the shopping malls I tended to avoid them. I did not wish to be in the crowds so my days were pretty much home days for the majority of the first year. When the weather permitted I went out for a walk staying within our complex where I felt the safest. After speaking with other ladies I have been so grateful for my writing even though in these last few months it has been a challenge. First of all I had some health issues that prevented me from writing in one form or the other. Then I had the most dreaded computer issues.

When I began this novel I questioned my computer durability to hang in for another book. Sure it will my husband and I decided. Well due to one thing and the other as I turned it on there was a bang with a big poof. Sparks flew. I screamed, my husband hurried into the room to see what was happening. By now I had unplugged it so I could once again breath easier. Our home was safe. So much for this laptop and I am in the process of preparing my manuscript for my publisher. Now what? Well my husband had an old one, older than mine, so out it came but was not set up for Word. So we changed it over to something starting with a W and then that just was not working so to Libre Office I went hoping and praying it would hang in there. It sort of did, but with many added variances. The unwanted kind. I persevered. Finally we managed to get it put together well enough to forward it to my talented publisher. All I now have to complete my added pages is to rely on my husband’s oldest laptop. At this time my son is trying to gain information regarding refurbished laptops etc. One local business seems to have an excellent program in place, but we wish to research further. So I shall continue to hobble along as best as I can. Each day I felt drawn to the local television news for reports from our Health leaders as to the number of new cases in hopes of seeing the numbers drop. I found it heartbreaking to hear of the elderly people in care homes not being able to enjoy visitors from their family not to even mention how many lost their lives to this dreadful virus. In mid summer the numbers dropped, but as soon as colder weather came the numbers of infected cases and deaths among the elderly changed. I found myself being more cautious each day as to where I went. In the midst of all this I found I was doing more coughing than normal. Of course my mind quickly sped forward to Covid, and so I went for a test which quickly was determined to be negative. Now I felt better that I was not infecting anyone. Of course a couple days later it disappeared. This test did not hurt, but certainly was not fun. When the nurse inserted that foot long Q-tip down my nose it went from a tickle to an annoying

uncomfortable swipe. Within minutes the feeling was gone and my nose went home with me. There were outbreaks in Care Homes, prisons, hospitals etc. Just when I was thinking how fortunate I was to not have any of my friends infected word came that there were a couple with Covid. Covid had now struck of my family to their extended family. Like everyone else we anxiously watched for the report as to when we would be able to receive our vaccine. Finally our day came when the over 80 would receive an appointment. We were both so excited. We now had our day and time. The place was close to home. The parking was ample. The greeter was friendly and helpful. The staff were superb. Soon we were able to leave for home. We both were so happy and excited just as though someone had given me a dark chocolate bar. The day was Wednesday, March 17th, 2021

At age nine when I began to tell stories to the butterflies.

Taken at my Presentation at the Surrey Arts Centre on June 6, 2019.

This is when I was writing everything I could think of, but afraid to venture out into the published world.

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank my husband Bob for his many hours of hard work as he helped me with my limited computer skills that made this possible. His contribution of ideas helped to make me sound like my mother. I would also like to thank my family and friends that have been so ive as I worked to fulfill a dream I have had for many years. They pushed me forward each time I doubted myself. While my brother is resting in heaven, I thank him for the many years he stood by me as we travelled a tough path together. He helped to get us into mischief but helped with the consequences sometimes leaving me to fend for myself. This story of my mother in Momma, Momma, the Preacher’s Comin’ followed with the sequel Walking Barefoot in my Shoes is true with added fiction for interest purposes. In the second portion of her life’s story from page 300 on there is no fiction. I owe a special thank you to my family, my daughter Lori and husband Fred, my son Warren and wife Lisa. My grandson Jason and wife Nicole, grandson Chad and wife Chelsy, granddaughter Leah and husband Jason. Yes, we have two Jasons. We love them both. My great-grandchildren Kayden, Juliana, Brynlee, Theo, Landon, and Watson. These little people (even teenager Kayden) bring so much joy to our family.

Other Books by Doreen Brust Johnson

Momma, Momma, the Preachers’ Comin’ Book One

Walking Barefoot in my Shoes Book Two (Sequel)

Sounds in my Shadow Book Three

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